Fragile Pieces
by Leigh Adam
Summary: This is a mostly K/LC fic, but K/L and K/S shipping is there, Now farther into the Occupation more problems have arisen. Mostly follows Canon in some areas, complete AU in others. Spoilers for Season 2 and Season 3.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Fragile Pieces

**Author:** LelaKat

**Disclaimers:** I don't own these characters, they belong to the people who created the series, and none of them are mine

**Notes:** This begins around the end of the Season 2 finale starting down on New Caprica, Baltar is Pres for about a a year, etc

**References:** Just about anything up to the end of season 2 and the start of season 3 might and in some cases will be there, anything beyond that may or may not appear at all as I plan for this to go AU

**Anything Else:** It's my first time trying out a BSG fan-fiction so anything you have to say would be helpful, especially if you don't think I am representing a character right or if I screw up in a reference to something that happened previously in the show.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter One-<strong>

**Leoben-**

* * *

><p>It was almost time. Leoben could feel it with certainty; it was when one of his visions would pass. He had convinced the others it would happen, and though the ones, fours, and fives were doubtful the others had believed in what he had told them. It was comforting, to know his sisters believed him even if his brothers did not. It was the way of things.<p>

He looked at the pieces of the building and the boxes of things to put inside it, the Centurions would piece together the building in half a day or so, creating a place. Originally he had just wanted to make it a place to live, but the Ones demanded if it were to be a place to live, it should hold humans as well. So reluctantly he went back to the drawing board. The top two floors were for cylon use, the others below were for holding humans deemed troublesome.

They were the same for the most part, but one, the one for him, was different. It was the same size as the others, had the same amount of furniture, but the things in it would be different. It wasn't just for him; it was for him and Kara.

The time was soon when the humans who had been lost so long would be found, the refugees and what was left of a once great civilization of humans. It was odd to think of humanity as great, they were cruel, twisted and yet, he loved one of them.

The cylon model pocked through the boxes that were to go to this certain apartment with satisfaction. His plans had everything, there would be running water, hot water, heat and air conditioning, real food which keeping good had been a challenge but few knew that cylons were capable of tending to plants and animals for their tables. Soft blankets, some pillows, a bed for the bedroom, a real home.

Once he had tracked down the blonde woman's former home, her apartment, with the excuse to learn more about humans' habits, and inside saw the mandala, the mandala that would haunt her for days to come. He had flicked through her things and found all kinds of things that he came to believe were important to her. Photographs of someone named Zak, her mother, her father and herself at a young age, Lee and plenty of others, some of which included Boomer, Helo and many others whose faces were hidden from him. He took the Music data of someone who he assumed to be her father. He had also taken some of her clothes for her, maybe the sight of something familiar would comfort her he reasoned.

Looking down at the meager box of things he realized he needed something more to make it her's, to show her it wasn't just for his own fun and games, that he was serious about her. Problem was he didn't know what to get, he had everything for comfort, toothbrush, nice soap that had scents that matched those he had found in her apartment. Good food was already a given, one thing that had to be said about the cylons was that they eat much better than what was left of humanity.

Hearing the clack of heels against the ground of the Basestar he looked up, knowing it had to be one model. Six. Her light blonde hair stood out against the dim lit of the cargo area and she was in a nice dress, the kind Sixes seemed to prefer, something she had gotten to use against Dr. Baltar's womanizing ways to get into the defense programs and come to love. Leoben couldn't imagine Kara coming anything near anything like that.

He waited for Six to speak. She had always liked to speak before the others, and Leoben was one of the few who would humor her, something that had helped her trust him a bit more than some of the other models. She was smiling and the woman he considered his sister had a satisfied expression on her pretty face.

_She's pretty_, the thought coming to his mind as he regarded her with an expression of interest as to why she was here. _But she's not as pretty as Kara Thrace._

"Doral says if what you have seen is accurate we should be there in less than 24 hours." she said happily, she told everyone it was to finally eradicate all of humanity, but in truth he knew why. This six was special, she was Caprica Six, or Caprica as she had come to be called by others. He didn't think she would admit it to anyone, but he thought she missed Dr. Baltar.

"It should be accurate." he said quietly, trying to keep his own doubt out of his voice, what if he was wrong, the Ones, Fours, and Fives would never listen to him again.

As though she sensed his doubt his sister put a hand on his shoulder, a thing she had picked up from humans while getting the Doctor to let her into the defense mainframe. It was a thing of comfort and it was one of the reasons he liked this sister above most of the rest, she knew what to do. "We'll find them, and we'll find her." she told him confidently.

Leoben was not as optimistic, what if they found all the people only to find out she was on the Galatica which would no doubt jump away with it's sister ship the Pegasus? What would he do than? His work would be wasted. He nodded along anyway.

He sunk down to the floor and crossed his legs, lost in thought. He remembered the day as though it was yesterday. He had known she was the one the second he guessed her callsign. He hadn't known it right off the bat, it had been the first sighting he had gotten of the woman, but after, in that spilt second between death and downloading he saw something else. What he saw was the very same vision that kept him up all those nights, wishing it to reality so he could have it.

Kara's hair had reached shoulders and she was holding him, her head resting on his shoulder, seemingly happy to be in his presence. "I love you," the Kara in the vision murmured and closed her eyes while himself in the vision returned her embrace. Leoben clung to any identifying marks, part of the Caprican symbol was etched into her arm, the long hair, her dog-tags returned to her, presumably meaning _he_ was there if Boomer and Caprica were believed when they had last met the human resistance from Caprica.

He of course was Samuel T. Anders and one of the people he presumed would be in the way between him and Kara. Through fate they had met back on Caprica and despite his increased efforts to kill the man before the rescue party showed up, Leoben never caught him. He didn't think Lee Adama would be a problem, he wouldn't leave his precious ship but Sam, Sam was smart he knew that. He had headed a resistance and with some more of humanity's people they would be a problem. Not just because he was close to Kara in the first place but of what Kara might hope he would do to get her back. After all, she had brought back a part of the military for Sam, the least he would do was try to return the favor.

While he contemplated the deeper meaning of what he had seen and it's possible repercussions Caprica Six had reached down and picked up the box of Kara's things. Her lithe fingers, carefully took things out and than folded them back carefully, making the box very neat. He supposed whether you were human or cylon it came with being a woman, that everything was a certain way.

"She has absolutely no taste in clothes." She stated and watched his face flicker. "I mean it Leoben, if she wants to wear it she can but in my opinion no. And this isn't alot of clothes." he watched her bite her lip, another human thing she had seemed to pick up, he didn't remember her doing it before they attacked the humans. "I'd let you borrow some of my stuff for her, but I can't imagine her in anything like this," she tapped her dress with a hand; than she proceeded to smile at him "Can you?"

Her humor was infectious and Leoben returned the smile, "No," he answered the cylon model. He would have gotten more but moths had gotten to her other clothing or it had been ruined or just not in good enough shape. "It's all that could be taken from her home." he said referring to the apartment.

Caprica Six's finger traced across a small painting of the mandala he had seen in so much of Kara's art thinking in the silence, Leoben had never been much of a talker, and Six let him lapse into silence instead of trying to fill in the gaps like the Eights did or tried to dominate the conversations like other models often would.

Leoben didn't know how long they had sat there like that until Six made another suggestion to him. "You could ask the Threes or the Eights if they have anything." Caprica said, and he nodded in agreement which resulted in a rather pleased expression to emerge on Six's face.

Following her out the door he took one last look at the pieces of the building that if all went well would be put up soon. Than as the clack of Six's heels began to fade even farther away he shut the door depositing it into darkness that lurked in the belly of every space faring ship.

Before he and Caprica even reached the next corridor the pair ran into Boomer. The former Galatica pilot who had been used in a botched murder attempt against the now Admiral was visibly excited and ran up to hug him, in one of her fits of high emotion. The Two who called himself Leoben learned early on Eights were very emotional.

"It's just like you said!" She exclaimed visibly excited, a smile stretching across her features, "We found the trace radiation and a planetary system inside the storm just like you said! I'm going to see Chief again!" it was the last part that really made the Eight happy and he knew she would not have said it around the Ones for certain. Leoben did not have the heart to tell Sharon her Chief probably hated her, maybe it was better to let her hang onto a false reality of security.

He and Caprica Six followed her up to the others, visibly excited. Six glanced over at him, her eyes holding his gaze. "We're so close." She whispered to him as they went as quickly as Caprica's heels would allow her until she stripped them off altogether, "Thank the Gods" The woman exclaimed when they came across the others, the copies of their models, and the other five models besides themselves. All nodded except for the Ones which watched everyone else with cool indifference.

Ones had always seemed to feel themselves better than the rest Leoben mused, he wondered why. He vowed to find out.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Kara Thrace sat on a chair in a pair of cargo pants and her standard of two tank-tops. In the cot next to the chair lay Sam, who was asleep, sound asleep. Her dark eyes watched him, with a concern to them. She wasn't going to let Sam die, it was just a small sickness supposedly, but she didn't want it to be like Zak. Her mind told her they were two different situations but she was going to keep him alive.

He stirred in his sleep and she smiled, thinking about how lucky she had been. The Lords of Kobol had given her another chance at love, and she had spent the past year or so, the days were hard to keep track of for her, each of them blearing into the next to her, with him, under a blue sky. She knew it wouldn't last but until than, she wanted happiness for as long as she could, her life had been in measures of pain, a small moment of happiness was cherished.

Finally he woke up and she looked at him, his green eyes blinking tiredly. She gently placed a hand on his forehead, using the age old method of taking temperatures and decided he had a temperature that was note-worthy; maybe she should talk to Dr. Cottle just in case.

Sam, having always been able to seemingly read her like a book, opened his eyes a little wider and looked at her, half of the symbol of the Caprica colony from which they both hailed on his upper arm, the other half that was one her own arm. "I don't need a Doctor, I'm fine." As if to prove his point he coughed a little bit, revealing he wasn't fine indeed.

She rolled her eyes at him, and looked at him accusingly, already deciding to make him some soup to make him feel better. And than keep him at home for a while and see if he did indeed need a Doctor. She would still feel better if he was seen now instead of later.

If anybody had told her a year ago she would be sitting here, married, and pampering her husband who insisted he wasn't sick as usual, she would have asked what you were taking along with some other rude remark. But now, it was kind of nice to not have to wake up early and do rotations, fly the CAP, dealing with Lee, and Dee who still didn't like her, even when she was married to someone else and her days with Lee were long over.

"I mean it Kara. No Doctors." Sam said sternly and she wondered why he was going to lecture her, he knew she was going to do it anyway, they both did, and it was just a formality.

"If it gets worse..." she trailed off letting him know he had caught a lucky break and went back to what was the kitchen part of their tent until they got around to going to the woods for their house materials. She had it all planned out in her mind, a nice one story structure with separate rooms, and maybe an extra room just in case.

The man leaned back against the blankets with a smirk on his tanned face, happy he had won this round, and she returned to cutting up the beans and meat that was to go into dinner tonight. She had decided on soup, putting some nice herbs in it, in hopes it would help Sam feel a little better.

Pausing mid way over the meat she looked back at Sam, nervous to tell him what had been going on in her head the past couple days. It was probably just a hormonal thing, but she couldn't stop thinking about it. "Hey Sam" She started out hesitantly, looking at him, wondering what he would say.

He picked up immediately it was important, and sat up a little straighter, and looked over at his wife, who was back to cutting meat with a knife that had done it's fair share of cutting more than animal meat.

She bit her lip, slightly nervous, "What do you think about us maybe having a baby?" her dark colored eyes held his green ones and she stopped cutting the meat altogether again and sat down on the cot with him.

Sam looked surprised than his expression turned into a grin "Why don't we start now?" he teased her, going along with the idea, or seeming to at any rate. His expression turned serious and he looked at her slightly puzzled. "I thought you didn't want a kid though," he waved a hand indicating the past and what had made her choose to not have kids.

"I know, but I've been thinking lately, and if I am really like her, well I trust you." Not saying it out loud. That her own mother had not been much of a mother, and the ever present fear she would end up that way.

She put her hand on his "So what do you say?" her shoulder length blonde hair falling into her face as she leaned forward.

The former Pyramid player considered her a moment that stretched forever, before smiling "As long as I get to teach him to play Pyramid." he got out before he coughed again, reminding her about dinner.

She got up and went back to work. "She's still going to kick your ass at it." She decided, teasing him in return about it, happy he was okay with the idea. Kara trusted him with her everything and he would hold her back if she ever needed it.

"Your ass maybe." He trailed off joking with her, and she didn't look up from the meat she was cutting, and swept it into the pot to set over the fire with a flourish. She had eaten worse things in her days.

Dancing back over to where he was, the blonde looked down at the man who was in the cot, as if trying to picture something. Her shoes came off and her bare feet tickled the ground beneath them as she feel into place next to him. Curling up next to him, she asked him "What's her name going to be Sammy?"

"No no, you mean his name." Sam corrected her one hand playing with her blonde hair by her ear twirling it around his finger than untwirling the silky strands, and repeating this process over and over again. His finger traced the outline of her ear, and Kara shifted around, getting more comfortable.

Kara had never told anyone, but she felt like with Sam, she fit, it felt right to her. As though someone had made him for her they fit together perfectly, and even though she had felt this way before, Zak, Lee, now it felt even more special. Now it felt, what was the fairy-tale world? Perfect.

That was how she would describe this moment, perfect, it was just them, together, the smell of dinner began to waft through the air, and she whispered back to Sam, "What are your favorite names than? Boy _and_ Girl." she smiled, conceding him another victory, normally the two went for these small victories like a married couple, but for right now, she wasn't going to waste it.

"Hmm" He whispered in her ear, "You're really going to make me think about that, right now?" He asked her, and she looked at him, his green eyes twinkling causing giggles to rise in her throat.

The lightness in her chest felt strange at first but they had become customary, Kara felt happy for one of the few times in her life. "I am going to make you think about it because if not, you get burned soup."

"Later?" he said teasing her and kissing her on the lips again, before getting serious. "Well, I always had a favorite girl's name, Liana and a boy's name..." he trailed off, as if he wasn't sure about next part of what he was going to say.

"Spit it out Sammy," she said sitting up and looking down at him, the scent of roasted meat, a scent that dinner was almost done reminding her to get up and check on it, and a part of her wanted to say heck with it and stay here with him. But their neighbors would complain as usual and besides, as much as he didn't like admitting it, she knew he needed his strength.

"I just always liked the name Zak" he told her quietly watching her reaction. Her light-hearted expression grew more serious when his name came up, Sam didn't know the entire story, but he knew there was a lot to it, she would have to tell him one day but not now. Not now.

She nodded, the name of Zak Adama had haunted her for a long time, she would never forget the thing she had done out of love that resulted in so much pain. "I like the name Zak too," she whispered before turning to the dinner, a silence having grown but it would not stay for long. It never did.

Spooning soup into the bowl, she wafted some of the heat away and pulled a spoon from a drawer. Returning back over to the cot she sat down and looked at him authoritively one hand on her hip. "Open up." as she held some of the liquid in a spoon

Looking amused he raised his eyebrows at her, "I can feed myself Mom." he informed her quite seriously, the look of mischief in his eyes betraying the fact he was only teasing her. "I am not that sick." he took the bowl from her and spooned the soup as fast as his throat could stand the warm liquid. While he was doing that she spooned her own meal into a bowl and said a prayer, in Thanks for food, the people she had, and the safety, for however long it would last. Kara than proceeded to wolf it down, hungry from working hard at making a water system from the river nearby.

The happy couple sat in silence for a while, neither speaking to the other, just enjoying the other's presence. _It should always be this way_ the Viper pilot thought to herself, just the two of them, in a home of some kind, sipping soup under a twilight sky. Some people thought of their old homes back, a nice house, a time when what to wear would be the biggest priority as opposed to food and water. She didn't want that, to her, she already had her fairytale ending right here.


	2. Chapter 2

Notes: This is mainly filler, I'm trying to kind of set the scene and get a feel for the characters. We will get there eventually, please be patient with me, and if you have any comments, good or bad, I'd love to hear them.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2-<br>**

**Leoben-**

They had plotted the distance to be there in a few hours, they would have jumped in immediately but as the Ones put it, 'there was nothing quite like a slow stalk to build anticipation.' He had waited a year plus for his Viper pilot, a few hours wouldn't be too much more. At first just to see her, know she was alive, and probably with that Sam guy, or Lee if she was being really surprising. But than they wouldn't matter anymore, it would be him and her. Together.

He wondered about it all for a few moments, could it have been different? Could he and Kara already be together now if he was human instead of cylon? He felt human, or all the descriptions he had come across in the books he had read matched his own descriptions. And yet he wasn't, he couldn't die within resurrection range, he was strong, far stronger than they. But he had felt pain as they did, he loved, surely it would have been enough.

He remembered her hate as she spoke of him, her anger over what they had done to the colonies. He knew in her mind he would have to go from the bad guy to the good one than to something more. He felt he could do it; he had to, the want to hold her, to have her be called not Sam's girl, not Lee's girl, not even Zak's girl, but his girl. Leoben's girl.

Leoben had to believe it would change, he had nothing going for him if he had the smallest hope of it taken away. The ones lived for their purpose, to destroy all the humans that needed it, he was the two, Threes for whatever Messianic mission her mind had given her. He wasn't sure what her role in the stream was to be honest. The Fours lived for their work in creating a life and the Fives were the spitting image of grunt work, Six for her Doctor and keeping the Cavils in line. The Eights lived for keeping everything going and reminding them what it was like among humans. The Eight who liked to be called Boomer had lived among them the most time; she knew the most, what it was like to even love one.

It was why he was seeking her out now, to talk to her about it; he would need anything he could get to help get Kara to see he wasn't trying to hurt her. His boots made no noise as he walked down the steel floors, down to the area this Eight liked to stay in.

The door was open and he knocked on the door frame. He saw Boomer laying on her bed, reading a book. The book he realized was about the history of flying, how it all started with the simple machines. He watched as the cylon put her book down and turned to face him. He looked at what she put in as the bookmark; it was a picture from a long time ago, of her and a whole bunch of other people all in the Colonial Military uniforms. He picked out Kara's bright blonde hair instantly.

"Come in Leoben." she said quietly pushing the photo farther into the page of the book so he might not see it. He knew that though she had turned and embraced her cylon self, she still missed them, the easy friendship and the affection her humans had brought her.

He nodded in greeting, and before he could ask his questions, the Eight blurted out something. "Tell me the history of the 13 colonies. I know I have it but I want to see it from another's perspective. To actually be told it and not programmed with it." Leoben could see it was the last part that had bothered her, though the vote had been unanimous to send the Eight copy off on her mission to be programmed as a human, let her be human for a long time than strike, none of them had given much thought to how this eight, being told she was human than having it all jerked from under her feet would feel.

He paused; they had a few hours, why not? "It all began on Kobol." He started referring the small green planet they and the humans had both fought on. "That was the birthplace of all mankind. It was there they become, created, and therefore began to learn. They thrived. But the 13 colonies had to leave their home, and it was there the 13th tribe decided to strike out there own way. They left on a different ship, and the oracle Pythia spoke of a planet named Earth was where they went. The other 12 went on to their colonies with their capital Caprica.

"There on Caprica and the other planets, their societies rose again, fighting one another for land, people, riches, wealth any number of things. But it is important for it is where our own race began. They built machines, creating life, playing God. And when they kept on treating the machines unfairly, the robots turned on their masters. It was the first cylon war.

"I was not around for the cylon war, it was before our time. Ones may know some, him being the oldest of us, but just a bit. He says he came near the very end when the armistice was declared.

"For forty years, nothing happened. The humans, human as they are, slowly began to forget. Forget the old Centurion models that had battled so hard against them, they allowed themselves to slip into peace, and the stream of forgetfulness. But we did not forget, we did not feel humanity had paid enough of their debts to us, and such, we began to continue to plan.

"Six, Caprica Six, was supposed to get into the Defense Mainframe through Dr. Baltar, she would help him with him military navigation systems and she would re-write the program, allowing us into the system. Plant her logic bombs in the defense mainframe and they never stood a chance. We used the back way in all their military navigation systems to shut down their spacecraft, the battlestars, the Vipers and the scouting Raptors and than it wasn't a problem, just shot them down, launch the nuclear missiles.

"So we used that to destroy most of the humans except for the human fleet whose numbers are hovering near the 40,000 mark, many of them civilians." he finished, uncomfortable with the story, they were the facts, but those facts were the precise reason when he had met Kara when found aboard a ship and was a cylon, she had taken to shoving his head in bucket of water. He didn't care, he loved her anyway.

His blue eyes looked at Boomer, who took in this information carefully. She seemed sad to him, and he felt bad. She had asked for the information, and yet, it seemed cruel to have dumped it all on her like that. Neither spoke for a moment or two, the only sound was silence.

"I actually have a question for you." He said, trying to break the silence around them, it growing uncomfortable, even for him. The man, the man who was a machine, who wasn't human, who couldn't die like any other of his race, had a hard time bearing this silence. Eights were impulsive, and there were times when he wondered if she was going to hug or kill him. Added with her emotions going to extremes were dangerous, but it was just the way she was made.

She took a moment to hear him, as though he was trying to get through to her from a long way. Like a long time ago, when it took measurable seconds to go from one part of a phone conversation through the other. Her dark brown eyes looked at him and she didn't need to say the words to let him know he had permission to ask.

"I was looking through the things for the materials we have for New Caprica. And I was wondering if you would be willing to lend Kara some clothes" he started, everyone on board knew of this copy's, obsession, with the Human Viper pilot.

Boomer nodded, and got up from the bed and went over to an almost hidden door, and opened it up with a palm of her hand. Even though she had said she left her old life behind here was remnants of it, pictures, even her old uniforms with the human colonial emblem sewn proudly on them. A flight suit even, they could have used that. He didn't tell anyone else, the Cavils would grow annoyed, The D'Annas would call her names and going back with what she had originally wanted to do, box her or put her in cold storage, Simons and the Dorals would plot ways to get even, most of the Sixes, which all had a different name, wouldn't understand and get angry.

She wordlessly, opened a few drawers and took things down from hangers, when she returned he saw things he hadn't quite thought of in her hands, the standard of the gray and black military tank tops and a few pairs of pants, she wordlessly folded them in that neat way women seemed to have a way with.

The Cylon handed it to him and opened her mouth to speak. "There are some things you need to know about Kara, she's a fighter, but she's also a survivor. She will try and do both, when she starts to falter in a will to live you're in trouble. You're going to get killed, and you're going to download." The Eight thought about saying more, but he knew to her Kara was a friend. Betraying a friend felt wrong. Even now, on opposite sides of a war, she still felt loyalty to the loudmouthed Captain who had played cards with her.

"Thank you," The words leaving his mouth, it was such a human thing, and such expressions offended some models, and yet, he needed all the advice he could get. If the memories he had of her were anything to go by, precious few as they were, he had his work cut out for him.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

There were times when Samuel T. Anders wondered how he had had ever gotten so lucky. The world had ended, everything he had ever known had come crashing down, and yet, he had to be the happiest he'd ever been in his life.

He felt like he had a purpose now, he wasn't just some athlete who played pyramid ball, he was so much more than what he had been. Husband to the best Godsdamn soldier he'd ever met, if Kara got her way, which she would, he was never able to say no to her, he'd be a Dad and a face to the people. Back on Caprica after the attack he proved to be more than just a Pyramid player, he was a leader.

It was kind of cool really, he saw respect in the Galatica and Pegasus Battlestar crew and he'd never put on a uniform. Respect from the admiral even, though it came with the warning if he ever broke Kara's heart he'd be out the airlock in less than five minutes. But Sam had no intentions of destroying the woman who'd become his world.

Speaking of the wife, she was awake and looking down at him concerned, and he knew without even having to say it she would speak with the Doctor. Meaning to say something, he sat up and coughs hacked his tall frame. Kara's hazel eyes flickered a bit, upset, she hated him being sick and he knew it.

The silence stretched a moment while she tried to think of what to do, "Do you want some water, another blanket, more soup, anything?" she asked, sitting on what passed as a chair next to the bed and gently pushed his light brown hair away from his face. Kara bit her lip and he again, cursed this sickness.

"I wanna go play Pryamid." he said, referring to the game that was no doubt going on at the edge of camp, his spot taken by the pilot who called himself Jackpot. He couldn't manage to pass to save his life, but he was a good shooter. The game was calling to him; it was one of the good things still left in his life.

She sighed, "You can't play sick Sam, you'll only get sicker. I'm going to find Dr. Cottle, if you're not in this bed when we come back than," she stopped trying to think of something. It was a game they played, there were certain things they both thought unfair to deprive themselves of, so it usually consisted of extra chores. Like doing the dishes for a week, making dinner and other things Kara or himself didn't like to do.

"Than you don't get to play pyramid for a week. You get to sit on the sidelines and watch me take your place in the game." she smiled knowing she had him trapped; she could play a good game, but often had the tendency to play slightly unfair. He decided to go play a part of a game anyway, anything was better than sitting around and being sick.

"Be a good little boy Sammy and maybe the doctor will give you a sticker." She snickered as she went out the tent flap being Starbuck today. Starbuck and Kara were two different people and yet they were the same. Starbuck was her callsign, how other pilots recognized them without saying name or rank. And yet Starbuck was the pilot who pissed off the EX-O, did daring things and had more cylon kills than anyone else in the fleet, Kara was his wife who had confined him to bed. It wasn't even that bad, she was just over-reacting.

As he waited to make sure she was gone, he thought to himself, and how much it was in her character. Her doting on him didn't seem right, and yet, he pulled himself up and forced himself to tie his boots, just a little bit of Pyramid would make him feel better. That was the only medicine he needed, she was just over-reacting.

Peering out the door frame of the tent he made sure she rounded the long row of tents and went to the other side of the tent city, before he left. He passed a couple people and he waved at Chief and his pregnant wife Cally.

He broke into a jog, coughing a bit as he went along. The exercise felt good after being forced to lay in bed and do nothing but sleep and be spoon-fed. He wasn't near one hundred percent, but he felt he needed it.

Making it to the Court those he played with smiled and those who were on his opposing team faces' fell.

"So Sam, the wife finally let you out?" one of those who had been with him on Caprica called out, teasing him, everyone knew better than to make any comment about Kara, in his hearing anyways.

Before he could speak up to say he had snuck out another person from his team spoke up, one of Galatica's knuckle draggers or ship repairmen spoke up. "Of course she did, the Great Samuel Anders does everything she tells him to, Sit Sam, stay Sam, make me dinner Sam." he said amused, than abruptly threw the pyramid ball at Sam's head.

His hands easily reached up and caught the ball. _Now we see how close to being better I really am. _Feinting left and turning right last second before anyone can stop him, shoots the ball and he scores.

And the game has begun, despite it being harder to breathe than normal, and he goes from doing all the major plays, to blocking and passing immediately, Pyramid feels right. When he turns to block the marine with the ball opposite of him suddenly stops and stares behind him.

The game is paused and if you had really good hearing, you could hear the sound of a boot, standard military issues tapping against the ground. When you first saw her she didn't seem all that intimidating, medium small frame, long light blonde hair, the glare was a clue but when you saw her act, things changed. She moved with a purpose, a precision not seen by many from afar yet up close, you could understand how she had racked up the record of most cylon kills the Colonial fleet had ever known. She even beat the Admiral's record from the first cylon war.

She took in a breathe and silently Sam waited, and before she could go off on one of her famous Starbuck rants, a series of coughs hacked his frame, and her expression changed a bit. "Come on Sam," she said crossing the court, and taking his muscular arm and pulling with surprising strength. "You're sick."

He didn't resist, playing had made him dizzy and he wondered what idiot part of his mind had thought playing would make him feel better. It had made him feel alive before, but now he felt drained.

The same Knuckle dragger from before couldn't resist one more comment. "Sit Sam Sit!" he called at the couples retreating back. Without pausing his wife flipped him the bird much to the other players' amusement and the game began again. Going back toward the Doctor, he hated Doctors, something about them made his skin crawl, they were quiet, not saying very much.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

If anyone asked why she had been with Cottle so long before finding Sam out of bed, which she knew he would do, she would have said he was busy. But they weren't busy in fact. Because every six months Dr. Cottle got out a medication, shot it up her arm, and she wouldn't have to worry about any unwanted consequences from the celebration nights she had before Sam or anything the couple weren't ready for. And with the President pushing her whole 'the human race must survive' which was code for go jump in a bed, she would be pressured into keeping the baby. And since no one told Starbuck what to do, they couldn't yell at her, and she couldn't frak it all up, if she and Sam planned to have a baby right?

Cottle had at first been, rightly surprised. For one of the few who saw the effects of her mother on her x-rays and Kara's insistence she wasn't having a baby, ever. He was a bit more than surprised.

He had even wondered if she was joking and tried to tell her to think it through some more. But she had been thinking, and even though it sounded horrible, morning sickness, back-aches, even if she went back to Galatica she couldn't get in a viper. Being with Sam, down here, made her realize life wasn't all guns, and shooting and bothering the hell out of the Ex-O and getting away with it, that there was that nice stuff fairy tales talked about but never quite could capture.

So she convinced him to give her appointment to Sam, and he agreed. Walking back with Sam, she wondered if she should tell him about it. But looking up at him, she didn't want him to worry. Despite his insistences he was fine, he wasn't. Anyone could see that, and no one was going to know it scared her.

Arriving at the tent sure enough Cottle was waiting for her, smoking a cigarette as usual and his hands on his hips. Sam got another coughing fit and she resisted the urge to scream at the Doctor to fix him. Kara had a bit of a control issue, when something went on she could not have any part in controlling she freaked. To an extent she could control Sam, not wanting to, she could control Lee a bit, knowing what buttons to push to get him to just let her have her own way, if Kara Thrace did not have a part in controlling whatever came up she couldn't stand it.

True to his word the doctor didn't say anything to her, knowing when the Great Starbuck made up her mind it was made up. He looked at Same and said with a brief grunt "Get in here."

She followed him into the tent, it was messy true but there was a method to the madness. It was clean, sanitary, and everything had a place. Cottle didn't say anything, just began to talk to Sam and she mentally tuned them out, thinking.

What would Sam say? Would he freak out, would he be happy, or would he get mad at her? As much as she hated it she wondered what Lee would think too. Roslin would be happy she had finally gotten Kara to start a family and the Admiral would say something along the lines of being a Grandfather. But if it really happened, well...

The Doctor brought her out of her mental state, "He has pneumonia." he announced, in his way, and was about to light another cigarette until she gave him a death glare.

"Is it fatal?" she asked, trying to sound normal but slowly she was losing control, and she hated it.

"He's young. He's healthy. He has a very high chance." The Doctor shrugged clearly not very worried but she wasn't going to give up so easy. Sam had fallen back asleep and she looked at the man who had patched her up after so many fights.

"What can I do? surely there's medicine or..."

The doctor cut her off. "Medicine's scare. It goes to the really sick which he isn't at yet. Look if you really feel the need go bother Commander Adama who is sitting on an entire hoard of the antibiotics. But some more soup, rest, should be fine. The worst of it is over, he should be back and going in a few days."

She nodded, dreading the prospect of talking to Lee.

Lee and her went way back. Back to when he was just promoted to Captain and she was a hot-shot problem pilot. Way back before she met Sam, rumor had it she got off so easy because she had a certain Captain under her thumb. The rumors weren't too far off. They were friends than they got into something else and than it seemed to break. That was her and Lee, it'd be fine, could almost be called the start of a relationship and boom. Than she went back to Caprica and met Sam.

After that Lee had always pulled her in tighter. And Starbuck and pulled away from it, and she eventually broke her heart, because when she had to chose she choose Sam. Good easy Sam, asking for her affection, putting up with her and her antics. He let her have space when she got mad at him or fracked something up.

She went to a raptor nearby used for communication. No one was there so she hopped in the cockpit, it still felt natural after a long time, and popped in the launch key. She put in her colonial ID and boom, the Raptor had power. Now to say the right things.

She scanned and found BattleStar Pegasus's frequency, and bit her lip before going on the air. "Pegasus this is Starbuck, request to speak with Commander do you read?"

For a moment she got no answer and questioned calling again when Dee, Lee's wife and the girl he had replaced her with, so easily after she tried to get to terms with the fact she'd probably have never gotten to see Sam again and told Lee to frack off. Her voice was tight and controlled and yet, she knew Dee would be listening in, too afraid that Lee's marriage vow to her wouldn't have been enough,

She rolled her eyes, he wasn't smart enough to cheat and had no poker face at all. He couldn't lie to save his life.

Being let through she heard his voice on the line, "Hello Sir. The rumor down here is you have same anti-biotics and Sam, Sam's sick." it was hard talking to Lee. He had told her he loved her multiple times, and yet here she was, asking him for meds for her sick husband.

"Who told you that?" His voice was neat and clipped, though she could detect hurt in it. Well good, she had fallen for both him and Zak, she was done with what happened around them.

"Dr. Cottle." she answered as fast as possible, not wanting any silences. She waited for Lee's over thinking brain to figure out that if Cottle told her the big secret than it must be bad.

"Alright, I'll send a raptor down with them today they should be there by-" he was cut off by people yelling in the background. She only managed to catch one word. Cylons. She hung up the wireless, and raced out of the raptor, grabbing a fairly large gun, a heck a lot more ammo than she could use in a fight and looked up.

The specks of the fleet were jumping away, and she could see Cylon raiders flying over head, it felt so odd to see them, but not be in a cockpit with some firepower at the tips of her fingers, waiting to be deployed into some machine.

The sight was scarily beautiful.


	3. Chapter 3

**Note:** Hey you guys, thanks so much for reading, it means a lot to me that someone clicks on this and reads it. As always if you have anything to say I would love to hear from you, I'm not too happy with this chapter for some reason so anything you think about it would be great. Also, I know not much has been going on, but I have a certain idea on how this is going to go down and it is taking time to get there. So please bear with me.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Three- <strong>**Shortly After the Raiders flew in**

**Kara-**

For a few brief moments she did not move, standing shock still at the controls of the raptor their blinking lights seeming to mock her. What could she do with a Raptor really? They were meant for scouting and/or good transportation missions and even so this Raptor had no real weaponry in fear of people would get hurt. At was around this time her military instincts kicked in, days of attending the academy, than war college, teaching at the same damn academy, and more than one year of fighting these toasters they were automatic, she went with what was right, what her gut said, people argued against it, but she came back from battle. They didn't.

Right away she knew they were going to lose. They lacked fire-power, most of the military was in the ships that had just jumped away, and she was probably holding in her hands the best firepower they had. In ways of guns, maybe Chief had some explosives or something or Tigh had some in the underground area they had constructed in the tunnels with the need to have a weapon's storage in caser this happened. Either way she was by far out-numbered, and definitely out gunned.

The odds had never stopped her before, why should they stop her now? Running to Tigh's tent she pulled back the rug and opened up the hiding place. She threw in the gun and everything else she had carried from the raptor smaller hand guns, comm links, the computers, ammo everything she could carry. She went back up as fast as possible, having heard the unmistakable sounds of those centurions walking. Metal clanking against metal, a soft hum as they scanned the area. They were sounds you never forgot.

She even saw a couple skin jobs, or the human looking cylons. Brother Cavil, that freak Leoben who said he had a nuke and she spent hours torturing only to find out there was no such thing. Out of all of them, he bothered her the most, he knew things about her he shouldn't. Kept saying she had a destiny, and he knew about her mom. Only a few people knew about hr mom, and she could count them on one hand. Helo, Sam and Zak before he'd died. Her attention returned to the cylons as she noted that reporter lady that had been on Galatica to interview a whole bunch of people turned out to be cylon being there were two of her walking side by side. Kara did not find herself surprised, she even felt somehow deep inside, she had expected it. Simon and Doral, both of which creeped her out for varying reasons. The blonde cylon didn't have a name as far as she knew, but she hated her, she had nearly been killed by that model multiple times, and Boomer.

There had been the Boomer copy on Galatica who her friend Helo fell in love with, she thought he was nuts, but hey if she made him happy, which was the only cylon Kara would accept as not evil. That Sharon had saved her life, the Sharon infront of her was not to be confused with good Sharon even though they were biologically identical. This Sharon had tried to kill Admiral Adama, she had betrayed Kara.

She found Chief, as a large amount of Centurions walked between the people. Cally was beside him and Chief was holding his wife, trying to calm her down, freaking out wasn't good for the baby. She knew Cally had a bad experience with the Centurions and it was taking every ounce of will to stand here and not go out there and do something so very Starbuck.

She wished she hadn't hid the gun. Starbuck wished she had it with her, and would take out as many of these things before they hurt anyone here. Before they took out her. But she was no use to anyone if she got herself shot and killed. She was a survivor, she had survived her mother, the academy, Zak's death and the guilt aftermath, the nuclear holocaust, when her Viper went down on the moon, Caprica and the Farm, Admiral Cain, Lee replacing her, going back to Caprica. She could survive this. These people needed her, needed a hope that things were not as bleak as they seemed. The Admiral would come back, and he would save them, she had to believe that her Father figure would come back for her. That he wouldn't leave her behind with horrors like her own father had so many years ago.

"What do we do?" asked Cally, looking at her husband and the Viper pilot, who along with Colonel Tigh were the highest ranking military on the planet's surface.

"Fight 'em till we can't." she said, even though fighting would be hard. They could do it though, there had been a Caprica insurgency, and there could be one here. Blow the Toasters up till they got sick of downloading; buy time so the Admiral would come back for them. She knew he wouldn't leave them here. He couldn't just leave them here. He wouldn't leave her, he had said she was like family to him. You always come back for family, the kind you care about anyway.

The people shifted, as the human looking cylons walked out of Colonial one, which served as the President's headquarters.

She knew inside before he even said a word to the people, _President Gais Baltar_ had surrendered. When the going got tough he freaked out, he was a selfish self-centered man. He wasn't even a good frak. He wouldn't have lasted five minutes in any kind of military school, not even theory. Baltar was a nut job, and though she normally never voted, she voted for Roslin last election, even though the woman had lost. The former President herself was looking at him in distaste, surrounded by schoolchildren who were frightened.

She shifted, hating the man; he was giving them up, just like that? All these people here, under the mercy of the cylons that had destroyed their homes, fled from, killed their friends and families. It was so obvious who had control here, and it was not her, who had the control wasn't even human, it was machines.

The Basestar was landing down and her inner pilot that couldn't resist critiquing said it was a horrible landing and if she had been testing them she would have failed them on the spot. She wondered if it was safe to explode this close to the human tent city. Probably not, maybe on the other side, she toyed with the idea, and decided she was going to do it. It would take some fine-tuned planning and some out of the box thinking but hey, she wasn't normal. Out of the box was where she lived. .

From her point in the city she could see Centurions furiously working hard. They attacked the ground with a vigor as though it had been a problem or insulted their mothers. If cylons even had mothers, they had tried to make a cylon have a mother, her mind nastily reminded her, but they had failed, or at least she hoped so. At the very least she had made sure it wasn't her.

She stood there for Gods knew how long. Quickly a building was beginning to show, and with the materials she saw on the ground, it seemed to be a prison and or a penthouse. Oh great, knowing her and her anger management she'd end up in one of those things as much as she had gone to Galatica's brig. Which was at least once a month to cool down, it had used to be once a week.

There were also other things that fascinated the woman and se stood on the outskirts, watching. There were multiple couches, chairs and mattresses. Not the military issued mattresses that sucked and made you wish you were able to go planet side, but like, those really good mattresses. Why do machines want to sleep anyways? It disgusted her really, how much the cylons tried to be human, they looked human, they sweat, they punched, their eyes twinkled and they could play a good hand of cards sometimes. But in the end of the day, they were machines right?

She turned at some footsteps running this way, and turned to see Saul Tigh's wife running her way. Kara had never gotten along with her, must have had something with her habit of pushing her husband's buttons and his response of putting her in the brig.

"You have to help me." The woman panted out of breath, conveniently forgetting she had been the one who started the rumor Kara had gotten her promotion to Captain because, and only because, she had been sleeping with Lee. Which was complete BS as Admiral Cain had promoted her before her death, but the rumor stuck, added with the fact at that point in time Lee was said to have worshipped the ground she walked on many believed it.

But hey, the world had ended, and now they were on this rock, with almost nothing in the way of guns or people to shoot them, and with the stupid downloading thing, against an army that could bring itself back from the dead.

"They took Saul." And at this the older blonde began to cry, "We were eating lunch and they just burst in and took him." and she turned to sobs and her shoulders were shaking.

Kara looked at the woman in a loss, she had been told from day one crying was weak. Plan for the worst, pray for the best, crying had only gotten her in more trouble and she had restrained the tears in fear of more pain. She was never good at these kinds of feelings, locking them up and keeping the walls up. Not many people met Kara, they met Starbuck instead. Starbuck was her soldier, what come out at parties, battles, fights anything, Kara was who she was. Kara was weaker than Starbuck and Kara never wanted to show that to anyone. Starbuck was fearless; Kara was the little girl who got the door shut on her hands.

"I don't know how to help." She confessed, not wanting this. She was one of the highest ranking people left on this planet, military wise and she couldn't make these calls. She had had lives depending on her, but this was different. She always had someone to answer to, now there was no one with the Ex-O gone.

Both of them stood there a few moments, before Kara decided to go check on Sam. "I gotta go." she mumbled and a friend of Ellen's or something came to comfort her. Kara began to run, the wind feeling sharp and cold against her lungs back to her tent on the other side of camp.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

In the chaos of the landing and everyone running everywhere from the Centurions, who were very intimidating. Leoben had moved among them, heading to the President's quarters with the others. When he arrived he found the other cylons negotiating the human's unconditional surrender. He did not take a part in it; he had no interest in Government affairs.

His hands flicked through the messed up, disorganized files of the desks many with stains of some kind or another one them. Not a small wonder the Baltar administration never did anything, they were headed by an idiot who drank too much, and took drugs all day. Finally after a few minutes of fruitless searching he came across what he was looking for, a map of the city by numbers and the legend to who was where.

Caprica went over to join him, her Doctor having gone out to explain to the people that the cylons were their new best friends. His lips twitched, he saw a lot of pain for Baltar in the future, most of it spewed from this moment.

He flicked passed the Ss, wondering how in such a small fraction left of humanity, there were so many surnames that started with S. Arriving at the Ts, he looked, Thrace, Thrace Thrace. While looking he silently prayed it to be there, surely he had not been led this far and the vision given to him only to be taunted?

It wasn't there. Bitter disappointment surged through him, had his vision been wrong, was this some kind of joke, had someone inserted the memory for the fun of seeing him act like an idiot?

Caprica had picked up the names and started looking through them, flicking through the As. She bit her lip when she came to a certain spot. He looked up from the papers, vowing to go through his memories again to find out what had happened, when Caprica pointed to something at the page. She was watching him carefully, gauging his reaction. She than instead looked out one of the windows of Colonial one.

Wordlessly he looked down, and what he saw only upset him even more in a completely different way. It wasn't Kara Thrace according to this log, it was Kara Thrace Anders. Which meant she'd married that, that, that man, and she would be even harder to deal with and he would have her Sam to deal with.

At least she's here, he assured himself, Thanking God, and a month may make no difference in the long run. He took the map from the table, there were more maps and set out the door.

With humanity still upset about the cylons he slipped through the crowd easily over toward where she lived. The humans paid him no notice, after all he looked enough like one of them and he was moving quickly enough anyone who might have paused had no time for second glances. Everything was disorganized and a mess, people crying, people swearing, praying to their Gods.

Arriving at the tent that was theirs he poked his head in, it was wonderfully messy, not at all neat like the female cylons dictated everything be on the Basestar. He heard coughing, and it was like music. Sam was sick, and so no one would be surprised if he got sicker, and just died. A devious plan went through his mind, and was stopped by another vision, showing the man taking part in a resistance action against the cylons. Which was equal to telling Leoben this man would live to die another day.

"Where is Kara Thrace?" he asked the sleeping human, who woke up, staring at him in concentration trying to remember where he had seen him before. Leoben watched him carefully trying to watch his movements. He noticed a small handgun on the table and while the man was still deciding he picked it up and took it with him.

The man still hadn't answered for a few moments until he answered he didn't know. She had apparently gone off while the chaos was going on, and it made him nervous. He needed to account for her to make sure she was safe, so that no one hurt her, human or cylon.

Leoben grew frustrated again; nothing was ever easy involving Kara Thrace. Before the human could ask why the cylon stalked out of the tent and into the crowd once more. Kara would not stay quiet for long. Once she made a move to attack the cylons he would know where she was. She had no reason to run from him, she had no idea of his adoration.

* * *

><p><strong>The Plan<strong>

**Kara-**

She was sitting in the underground facility that had been found incase of this underneath Tigh's house. They had been worried about it being found when the cylons made their own building but that was on the other side of camp. This was probably the safest place on the planet, excluding the other side of course.

Chief sat with a computer, trying to get to the colonial frequency in an emergency Raptor that had been put out just incase. All that showed was the signal was jammed, and you had to give the damned things credit. Machines were good at fighting cyber battles.

Her fingers twisted her long hair, a habit she hadn't had previously because her hair was too short to twirl. Sam had convinced her to keep it long, saying it looked good on her. Good old Sam, who because he was sick was sitting out on the first of the fun. Because there was nothing quite like blowing up Toasters. She had promised when he was better he would be allowed to fight but privately she wanted him to have nothing to do with any of this. What he had on Caprica was different from now, he had the resources of a nuked, but still resources from a entire human civilization. This was nothing, this was worse case scenario drilled in every cadet as preparation, it was marked possible, yet unlikely.

But it had happened, and she didn't want to send out anyone, who wasn't trained, anyone who wasn't fit. There would be no more Zaks, she had promised herself that.

Chief was swearing under his breath, a few of the pilots and some of the people from the Caprican resistance were there, waiting patiently, looking at her. She tried to hide in the barely lit room, the only light from the small fire torches burning the wood they had been able to collect. Curse her light blonde hair that stood out against the dark. She had gotten that from her father or so her mother claimed. Kara couldn't even remember much of him anymore, him having left her with her mother when she was eight.

For a brief moment the cylon she had been in charge of interrogating, Leoben's words rang in her ears. _"You were born to a woman who believed suffering was good for the soul. So you suffered." _As horrible as her mother had been, Kara privately wished she was here to be in charge instead of her, though the woman would do as much damage to her as a cylon would. Someone anyone, but not her.

"Anything Chief?" she asked, in hopes of delaying them from asking her the inevitable, what to do we do question, and automatically electing her leader. She could control an Airgroup, but a total resistance, no way. She didn't want a power position; she was fine being underneath her superior assholes.

The question Kara had been dreading came from Jamie, who was a part of what was left of Sam's resistance/Pyramid team. "What do we do Starbuck?" Everyone was watching her and her green eyes looked in everyone's faces for a moment. They were counting on her, they didn't need Kara, what they needed was strong Starbuck. The pilot who got in the cockpit and beat the living frak out of their enemies not Kara Thrace.

"Okay, I say we go for their basestar first. Blow a gaping hole in the side of it, nighttime, not the day, when we set it up and the thing explodes we run for the forest and hide in the trees at the base of Stalin hill. If you are followed ditch them and go to the hill. Don't bring cylon friends with you. You compromise that spot we're all down and I will personally kick your ass. Than we sneak along the tree lines and go up through the river. Any questions?" No one spoke except to offer one other targets, lookout who would go where. It was a rough plan, gutsy, nothing in the textbook like Lee would have insisted on doing. But _Commander_ Adama wasn't here and this was her show for now. She would give these freaks hell, it came with being Starbuck.

Chief agreed to make the bomb, and trigger device for it, she got a couple brave souls to do smaller, yet just as important work on the cylon resurrection station. The plan was if they were running at the explosion at the plant they wouldn't notice the basestar till it was too late to react in time to stop them. Snipers would be set to knock off centurions and mines would be set up just incase some of the friends chose to follow along.

The plans were set for a few days and they would be worked out more as they got more intel on the habits and routines of the machines. Satisfied everyone snuck out from the tunnels and out from Tigh's tent back to their own. The first thing cylons had done was imposed curfew like overbearing parents on teenagers. Unlike parents anyone who got caught breaking it would be thrown in dentition and probably wouldn't come out.

Waving goodbye to Ellen, who she still didn't know how to help, she walked back to her tent. Being thrown in brig happened to her a lot, and yet, the cylon version didn't sound like fun. If it was anything like what they were doing on Caprica, she wanted to be as far away as possible.

Slipping under the flap Sam was sleeping softly, a cough sometimes hacked his frame and she gently took some water over to the bed and thought about shaking him awake or letting him sleep some more. Putting the water next to the bed incase he needed it she carefully crawled in next to him as to not wake him up. She was worried, though she'd never let it show, not even to Sam. Afraid he was going to die, afraid she was going to die, afraid the plan was going to fail.

Kara didn't know at the time that there was someone outside the tent, doing the same thing she would have done if her main enemy was fast asleep in an easy to find location. The silhouette shown against the cylon searchlights and she carefully got up to see who it was, calling out a hello.

When she opened the flap it was gone, a pair of boot-prints the only show it had been real. After she laid down back in bed after she was sure the person was gone, she did not sleep for a very long time.

She didn't know Leoben was crouched behind another tent, smiling at her presence.


	4. Chapter 4

Author Note: Exams had been keeping me down, but I got this finished and have begin chapter five, as always I hope you like it and if there is anything you would like to tell me, enspecailly if there is anything you think I can improve on, please tell me in a review. As always, thank you for reading.

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter Four-<span>**

**Leoben-**

She was here. Kara was here, she wasn't on Galactica, or Pegasus, or anywhere else in the universe during the invasion. Though her name had been on the page there was the chance she was doing supply runs or something up in space. But now he knew, with his own eyes, she was here. He had heard her voice, and saw her for the briefest moment, she was really here, this was really happening. After all this waiting, finally he could see the end of the chase for her.

He just had a couple more things to put in place, make sure the Centurions would shoot at her, but miss. Leoben knew in her personality, and all she had done against them, she was the fleets' golden girl after all, she would not keep quiet. He was surprised there had been no attack coming from her yet. Just a few more coding adjustments and he would be done.

As he worked, he wondered what the other models would think. Centurions had guns built in them for a reason or so the Ones said. And yet, to scare, not kill. To take down an enemy slowly, or watch it destroy itself, Leoben would prefer watching the humans rip themselves apart, explosions became dull after you sat back and watched a nuclear holocaust. But no, like some action movie there had to be guns and they had to hit people, not just scare them and so he rigged the machines to not kill Kara Thrace.

Kara was different from the other humans; something drew him to her like a moth to flame. The rest of his line thought he was crazy and he had been threatened many times, mostly by Cavil, to be boxed. Put in cold storage, a fate more horrible than torture, you couldn't die; you couldn't think you could only be in a vast, cold, emptiness. As a mean joke one of them had put him in cold storage for an hour and it had been horrifying, he would rather die, at least, even if Kara was right and he didn't have a soul, it was better than being in that void.

Making the final adjustments to the metal beings' programs Caprica came up behind him, looking emotionally exhausted. She looked like a mess, rather than her usual put together self and the way she dictated everything around her be.

He quickly finished what he was doing and walked over to his sister, and did a very human thing. He hugged her, like a brother would. He didn't buy into the Ones and some of the other models philosophy that every model would behave the same way. Caprica was different, they could argue because she was designed differently Boomer was, but there was no excusing the other Sharon, they were all different, they shared the same traits, sometimes, and were biologically identical, but they were far from the same. He was a very religious man; while there was a copy of himself who was an atheist, as hard has some of his other models had tried to get him to convert. They weren't all the same, they were people, had souls, different identities, different destines.

When a choked sob escape his sister he murmured to her comforting words. He just held her as the Six, so put together, broke down, he held his sister as she cried. Leoben didn't ask, but he knew it must have had something to do with her Doctor. In his opinion, the Doctor didn't deserve her. Caprica was beautiful, as her brother he knew that, she was smart, she was fun to be around if you caught her in a good mood. Her favorite color was blue. She hated the taste of beef and refused to eat it with stubbornness. She, despite being the one that had given them access to the defense mainframe to kill billions, was a pacifist, hating violence.

Leoben wondered what this man had said to her that made her cry so hard, she rarely showed any kind of raw emotion, while not made of battle-resistant metal like the Centurion counter-parts, she was normally made of it in the metaphorical sense of the expression. And now she was shattered into tiny pieces, crying and upset, tears running down her face.

"He called me a machine," the blonde gasped out between sobs. "and even though I am one he doesn't have to say I'm cruel and heartless and that he hates me." Caprica Six was leaning heavily on him now and he moved through the base star to take her to her quarters, knowing there was not much he could do for this. He felt protective of her in a big brother sort of way.

Part of him wanted to wring that human's neck until he was nothing but a pile of bones. Another part of him knew it would be counter-productive in getting the humans to not rebel, at least not too much anyway, and it would hurt Caprica if he died. So he just stroked her hair and comforted her.

Some people thought the cylons were just emotionless, flat beings that had no feelings. How wrong they were, if they were programs, than they were real to them. One of their own had turned her back on her entire species for her love of a man. He loved Kara Leonora Thrace. Boomer still loved Chief despite her denying it and the fact he had moved on. Caprica loved Dr. Baltar, despite his many faults, self-centeredness, and the fact he would only pay attention to her because he thought Leoben's sister was pretty.

He knew he had things to do, they had decided that there were jobs each would do when they got to the surface and he had to get to work on setting up the power plant at once. But he could not just leave her here, all by herself to cry.

She waved her hand at the wall and her room opened and he realized that even though it was all very put together, she was far from the minimalist he was and she had more than enough clothes to give each human woman a dress and more, it was all very neat and color coded. He got her a glass of water and set the glass on her night side while the exhausted Six laid down.

He staid with his sister until she fell asleep, and knew that somewhere out there was the man who hurt her. He prayed to God, hoping her love life would get better, and for luck in dealing with Kara.

Leoben wasn't sure how long he sat there praying. He just knew when he was done his knees ached and he was going to get an earful from Cavil later today for shirking his work. Exiting the room, he went down the metal hallways at a carefully measured pace with a perfectly measured beat. He had always liked patterns and rhythms, walking was no different. Even on sidewalks back in the colonies, he wouldn't step on cracks.

Without warning an explosion rocked the grounded Basestar, causing structural damage and a fire to break out, tiny chain reaction explosions were everywhere and he began to run to it's source, jumping over flames at a inhuman speed and working to go around those he couldn't jump. All around him he saw dead cylons, humanoid models or Centurion made no difference. Others were shouting and yelling for what was going on, grabbing a gun or bring a centurion with them.

He knew inside him, this had been no accident, and as he grew closer to the gapping hole, and heard faints yells of elation over the noise of the fires and explosions, he was only confirmed right. Humans had done this.

Leoben was depressed; death was a horrible thing, even if you could download. For him it was always a mystery, the wonder if, maybe this time, you really wouldn't go back, or if as a cruel joke one of his brothers had boxed him again, was always there. He could only imagine what it was like for a human, shutting your eyes, never seeing your loved one again.

He had no time to ponder on it; he zigzagged through the flames in a way their God Apollo himself would envy. He saw the figures ahead running into the tree-line and followed them, every running step he took bringing them closer to him.

The cylon knew he couldn't get them all, at least not all at once. Other models, the fives and another two who decided to call himself Jared after being killed by Adama at Ragnar Anchorage. He would have to pick one and zero in on it, only one to chase instead of them all. Leoben wondered in some small part of his mind what Kara was doing and where she was and if she had anything to do with this. She had probably masterminded the entire thing; he ought to be angry about it but the only thing he could feel was admiration for her. He never could be angry with her.

Up ahead one of the figures hood's slipped and revealed shoulder length bright blonde hair. Even in the darkness of an almost complete night there was no mistaking who that belonged too. Leoben switched from a man in front of him to her, now tearing through the trees after the figure. There was only one woman he knew of among all these survivors with hair like that. He had no intentions of letting her go. Not when she was so close.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

There was nothing quite like the satisfying explosion that resulted from the explosives they had detonated around the basestar. It would make anyone's day better, shooting at things, making things explode, making the enemy weaker. It would come back she knew that, and yet, she let loose a yell of ecstasy along with the rest of the fledging resistance. Screw professionalism, they were all on their own with not much of a chance of help, as much as she wanted to believe otherwise.

As she and her people ran off into the distance she vaguely realized they were being followed. She was relieved they were only skin-jobs, humanoid models, nowhere near as tough as centurions. Only a few too, they must have really been caught off guard.

Her mind noted four of them, two Leobens and Dorals. Against 20 able bodied soldiers and some snipers who had set themselves up along the tree line along with rigging some other nasty surprises for the incoming company. Motherfrackers didn't stand a chance.

She didn't like how fast they were coming up however, but they didn't seem to have any heavy weaponry. Nothing like automatics or anything just a couple hand-guns which they were too far away too use. But not for long, as the distance between them and weapons range was dwindling as her people began to show signs of exhaustion while the cylons did not stop. As a five stumbled across a home-rigged landmine, she smiled as the other ran back to see what was going on, it did not seem the Doral models were particularly smart. That left two models now, and they were her least favorite.

The two remaining had begun to draw in on them closer and closer before a shot was fired. Glancing backwards the Doral who had fled fell in the dirt, kicking and screaming as the bullet found him. Two down, two to go.

She didn't like this hand to hand stuff, it reminded her too much of her past, she preferred sitting in the cockpit of her bird and shooting the raiders any day of the week. She wished she had chosen to stay on the ships, then she wouldn't be done here and if it got all fracked up it wasn't her fault. Because that was what Kara Thrace was best at, fracking it all up. She had known that from a very young age even before her Dad had left her all alone with her mom.

The cold bitter wind tore at them, gusting relentless and her hood fell back, revealing her bright blond hair. She silently cursed it, while she did like her hair now was not the time in the middle of running for your life in a dark night and trying to get away from toasters that would shot you were you stood.

Kara wished she had the fore-sight to wear a ski hood, as any chance of dying her hair was far gone as when it was hard to get food day to day what made anyone think they could just go another shade anytime they wanted? They were far from home, which wasn't home just the remains of a nuclear apocalypsed world, little luxuries had never been on a battlestar anyways, not that she would have gone near them if they had.

Snatching up the hood as she ran even harder into the tree line she heard someone following her and went even faster. It was life or death, something that had been drilled into her from day one. Her or the toaster following her, there was no repeats no do-overs for her anyway, damn cylon got as many do-overs as he wanted. No nothing for her, and she was a complete idiot if she was getting caught the first week of the occupation. They hadn't even been there a full 24 hours and if she got caught now it was more than sad, it was downright depressing.

And besides who wanted to be a POW anyway? Not her, it was fighting all the way, she would not get caught by these things. Not after everything. They would not put her back in a farm, she would die first. Not that, anything but that, she was scared of being who Socrata had been, but having a hybrid child? No, she wanted a family with Sam, nice normal family, normal, or as normal as she would ever get.

Oh who had she been kidding? She demanded of herself as she ran on in the woods? _Did you really just think it would all go away, and you could just be let be and start a family with him and that it would be a nice bright shiny future Lee always talked about? You stupid girl for believing in that, you were never very bright but now? Did you really think it would be alright Kara, for one second did you? _Her mother's voice echoed in her mind causing her to nearly stumble before she pushed on, no time for that now, there would be time for that when she was dead or safe. Not now.

Flying over leaves and branches her lithe figure made her way to a tree that was climbable and she had made note of the previous day to climb if ever needed while searching out for food. Well now was a good of time as any right? She was just running for her life here, not trying to disturb the poor sleeping animals.

She came to the trunk running full speed and used her hands to pull herself off the ground and scuttle up the branches, trying to get as far off the ground and into the branches as possible as fast as possible. She wished again she had a gun but they had decided not to as Centurions would notice them and being armed would arise suspicion. No, it had been better to just let the snipers do their jobs. Pity the choice had been the one that was probably going to get her killed. She reached down in her boot and slowly pulled out a knife, keeping the one in the sole of her boot hidden in case she needed it later. She held the glinting thing in her mouth for easy reach should she need to be ready to attack.

Going branch after branch until she was a good ten feet up, taller than a centurion she looked down, the only disadvantage to her well covered hiding spot was she couldn't see much. But maybe it was a small price to pay for being safe, for not being killed.

Her heart pounded so hard she was sure the cylon chasing her could have tracked her through it. She would not be surprised if they were able to do that, you could program a machine to do anything right, why not track a person through a beating heart? It made perfect sense to her; she even knew if she were a cylon, and Thank the Gods she wasn't because she didn't think she could stand it, she would have done it.

She focused on being as quiet and as still as possible as her ears picked up the sounds of someone going through the foliage below, searching. Far too slow to be a resistance member running; too controlled she noted, it had to be a cylon. No apparent fear of death was how she would have classed them if still an instructor, only cylons can't die.

Kara held in a gasp as she recognized the head below her. It was Leoben or a copy of him, of that she had no doubt. She knew that head of hair anywhere, wouldn't you after spending eight hours of it spewing back unwanted memories and crap about how special you were? Kara Thrace and her special destiny; yeah right he sounded like her mother. Kara Thrace was a frack-up, proof of that was that she was sitting in a tree with her enemy not more than 10 yards below her hiding spot.

And he didn't seem too interested in leaving any time soon. Instead of going off to look for anyone else or the person he'd been chasing, presumably her, he sat and lounged against the tree, not looking up, just leaning against it like he was waiting for something. Fracker.

Kara had decided she was going to have to wait him out. She would not lose to these toasters, even if it meant dying of exhaustion. She'd die before she gave up one colonial code, die before she got put back into a farm of some kind where she would be used to help create more cylons the biological way. The thought sent chills down the soldier's spine.

She peered down, the green leaves making a great hiding spot for her, but also leaving her pretty blind she could just see what was directly below and 2 o'clock. And leaves rustling, even though there was a gentle breeze she would be given up in seconds, and they would know she was there. Spot compromised equaled one dead soldier.

_I wonder how Sam is doing. _She thought to herself before cursing herself and her ability to frack up. Because when things went wrong they went wrong so well. She was, face it. Sitting in a tree, with a cylon not more than ten feet from her who would probably hold a grudge against her and had no desire to leave any time soon.

She hoped everyone else on the team had taken her seriously when she said if someone got taken you don't go looking for them. Soon as there is first light, sneak back into camp, no matter who is there and who is not. The last thing she needed to have on her mind was someone getting hurt because they'd tried to rescue the almighty Starbuck.

Because Starbuck would rescue herself thank you very much. She just needed a plan, a way to get out of this mess and fast. Before the cylon got the urge to lean his head back and stare at the leaves.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

Leoben was not, resting his head against the tree. He was not tired at all. As if that running had worn him out, maybe a human but he was made of stronger stuff. Literally. Not what Leoben did was accessing the data stream, and sending for a Simon. And tranquilizers you could safely eject a human with without lasting effects.

It was very difficult to describe what accessing the data stream felt like. It was like using your mind to surf the thousands of pieces of information. He transmitted to Simon to bring a heavy raider, to appear they were just sending out a search party, and bring a dart gun. Simon could not shoot, but Leoben's aim wasn't too bad. The Eight who called herself Boomer had taught him how after he had asked her one day, and much to his surprise he didn't turn out to be a bad shot.

Of course the other two who was running around, Jared, choose that moment to enter the conversation. His voice in the stream screamed out who he was and drowned out everyone else's. Most cylons took care to make sure that they did not put a strain on the stream by being annoying. Jared was not most cylons.

Jared was a wild card. He had been killed at Ragnar anchorage by the military's top officer and upon download the first thing he did was draw back the scar on his face above his eye. It was unmistakable who he was, it was very obvious. He did it after every time he downloaded. He was rude, a rebellious type of cylon, disagreeing for the heck of it. He had no respect for anyone and had taken to telling Leoben in graphic detail if he ever got his hands on the viper pilot what exactly he would do to Starbuck. The thought made him scared, it made her treatment of him same extremely tame in comparison.

'You know, an easier way to get her, would be to just smack her upside the head.' His annoying voice that was uncanny like Leoben's own. They were biologically identical, but there was something in his voice, something that made him stand out. It was colder, more heartless. Little things like that was how you would tell the copies apart.

'That would be counter productive.' He replied back, the Simon having disconnected to go get the raider ready. He had been over this to other cylons countless times, using it as a behavior project. But it would happen; she would fall in love with him, his vision was proof of that. And Jared would not screw it up for him by being interfering.

Jared disconnected and Leoben knew he would not hear the end of it. Jared was like a mean older brother, even though Leoben was the representative of his model, Jared was everything you could think of. The older jerk at school who wore the sunglasses with the leather jacket and pushed younger kids in trashcans. The person you told yourself whose opinions did not matter, and yet you found yourself wanting their approval. Which you never would get.

He waited, and silently the human above him remained tense, waiting for her opportunity to escape. _Not this time _he thought to himself, _not when I've finally found you. _The heavy raiders hum entered his hearing and seconds later entered the humans as well. The poor thing was probably praying to her Gods' to spare her life, or saying final good byes and making final confessions. He hated Kara was so afraid of him, he loved her, she had no reason to fear him. He wanted to be with her forever and forever, he'd never hurt her or let anyone hurt her. That was a promise, he'd die a true death for her.


	5. Chapter 5

So we're back to getting Kara caught, I know, not the most exciting thing in the world but I want to do this a certain way and ask you to bear with me. The next chapter will hopefully be more interesting to you, And I am trying out a new point of view, I want to try differentiating besides just Kara and Leoben. Anyways, enough with the babble, and thanks for reading my story.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Five-<br>**

**Kara-**

What was the cylon doing? What the hell was wrong with him? What made him just stand there like nothing was going on? She had just helped blow up part of a grounded bastestar for Gods' sake. He should be doing something, not just standing by a tree.

But the cylon appeared to be waiting for something and knowing Leoben she wouldn't like it. _"He has an agenda, it's a goal you won't understand 'til later. Your job is to make sure he doesn't achieve the goal." _The admiral's words rang through her head and she knew he was right. Leoben had a goal to accomplish and staying here in this tree wasn't going to help her stop it any. Problem was she had no idea what he wanted, no context clues to go off of, nothing.

Leoben scared her more than anything if she was being honest. He knew things about her no one else had known, granted Simon could have seen it on the x-rays like Cottle had but Leoben was different. He'd actually told her, right to her face about her mother and it was before Caprica. No one had the right to speak about her mother that way least of all a skin-job.

Curled up against the tree she reflected on things while she waited for them to find and kill her. There was no chance to run, years ago or so she might have tried but now, hiding was the best bet. Best way to survive.

Kara thought about a lot of things, Zak, the old man, Lee, Dee, Sam, Helo the Galatica Sharon, The former President, Baltar, how he'd betrayed them. It wouldn't leave her alone, though she and the man never got along she hoped he was okay. He probably wasn't considering the cylons had him but you never know.

She thought about Sam being sick, how she might never see him again, the man had started to show signs of healing but you never knew with that kind of thing. And with what he had done on Caprica against the cylons it was very doubtful they would let him live even if he wasn't sick.

She heard the soft hum of a heavy raider and the branches hit her in the face as the thing landed nearby. It was officially over, there was no chance for escape with how close the machine was to her and she would be gone before she could do anything. Maybe she could do some damage when the time was right she reasoned, taking the knife handle from her mouth and holding onto to it with a vice grip. It was her only weapon besides the one in her boot sole and she would be heard reaching for it.

Kara felt a wave of helplessness cascade over her. She did the only thing she thought would help her. She began to pray to Artemis and Aphrodite in particular but anyone who was listening to her would do gladly. Prayer had always helped her, just the idea that someone was listening to her, made her feel so much better.

_Lords of Kobol hear my prayer _she began, knowing she could die any second made it seem all the more important to her that she do this.

And yet Kara did not pray for herself. No, she knew if the Gods chose her to leave the universe at that moment there was no stopping them. It was all up to them. All she could hope for then was Elysium and that Zak would be there. That was provided they let screw-ups like her in heaven.

_Please take care of your children who may be forced to depart from this world today and the days following. Please watch over the Colonel and the rest of the resistance. Grant us security and safety in the coming days, something we shall surely need._

_If the God Apollo wills it please allow Samuel to heal and go back to being the same he was before. Keep him safe in the coming days of war and please please please let the Galatica and the Pegasus come back and rescue us. Please save your children from the cylons and those who would mock your name._

_So say we all._

She could have gone on but there was movement below, forcing her to end the prayer. Kara hoped the Gods were listening to her, there would be so much trial coming. She needed their protection, there were just some things she felt she could not do without them.

Sam needed to make it, she didn't think she could pull through if he didn't. Was her touch really a curse, was she doomed to kill everyone she loved? She had effectively killed Lee, she had killed Zak, and so many others. The loss of Samuel would be a huge blow to her and she wasn't sure if she could pick up the pieces. She loved Sam, he never asked her to do anything she didn't want to do, and he accepted her for who she was.

Try as she might she couldn't stay as focused on the scene below as she haould, a cylon had emerged from the treeline, it was a Simon and he was holding some kind of gun. It didn't seem to be a regular gun though, she knew it was a gun, it had everything else a gun had, but the chamber seemed different. Starbuck knew she had seen it before, but where was the question.

But in a second it all clicked. She remembered their guns instructor holding the very same weapon up to show all the cadets. The man brawled that it was a tranquilizer gun, meant to bring people down if they were wanted alive. And the second it got a dart in you it was game over.

She shivered against the night not just because it was cold but because she realized she did not get a nice easy death. Nope, she was going to be a prisoner of war if they found her, and there didn't seem to be a damned thing she could do about it.

This had all been a joke that left a bitter taste in her mouth. They knew where she was all along, they weren't going to kill her right now, she would be dragged to a prison somewhere. Or a farm. Panic threatened to nearly overwhelm her and she sought to keep herself under control. Soldiers don't freeze up, you get through it.

Keep it together girl. she instructed herself and slowly below she watched the cylon hand the gun to Leoben, he gripped it expertly, knowing what he was doing, he paused to take aim upwards, knowing right where she was, she saw Leoben pull the trigger and the dart lodged itself in her leg, emptying it's contents into her blood stream despite the speed she pulled it out.

The drug would take effect in five minutes tops and she would be out for the count. Or maybe they were just going to let her fall to the ground and let whatever life besides plants and humans there was on this planet eat her remains because she bleed to death from the fall. It was the type of thing cylons would do.

Kara didn't say a word, no moans, no whimpers, nothing at all, not about to give them the slightest bit of satisfaction. If she had to lose she was going to do it with dignity, but her mind was swirling.

Her green eyes started to close as much as she fought to keep them open and her grip on the knife began to loosen a bit along with her hand on the trunk, and she was becoming unbalanced. The world was slowly starting to fade away from her grasp and yet, all she could think of was how sorry she was.

She was letting so many people down by not fighting until she couldn't. She began to list them in her head as much as she probably shouldn't, giving herself evidence she had fracked this up pretty damn bad made her mind clearer for a bit.

_Sorry Admiral. you gave me a reason to keep living and now I threw it away. After a while I probably won't be able to hang on anymore and will give things up to them, or die first and you always said you never wanted to loose me._

_Sorry Lee for what I did to you along with not being good enough and sorry to you to Dee, you always deserved him more than a frack up like me. I know you faced some rumors about us but I want you to know I will never come between you two on purpose, marriage is sacred. He choose you, even before I let him down. _

_Sorry Madame President for not being able to do my job, I always thought of you as kind of like a mother figure, I hope you don't mind. Even though I don't vote I voted for you. _

_Sorry Helo, you were my best friend. I don't deserve you in the slightest, and you kept picking up the pieces of me that kept breaking, it takes a real person to do that, though I don't know why you wasted your time on me I am sure glad you did._

_Sorry Sharon or Caprica Sharon for being a jerk to you. I didn't want to think that cylons could be different, or maybe was just too stupid too, either way, you deserved better treatment than what I gave you, you helped me, you helped me save Sam._

_Sorry Tigh for punching you, stealing your ambrosia and everything else. And now for leaving you to the cylons. I never liked you but ever since that conversation the day after ground-breaking I can see you really aren't that bad, oh and I'm sorry for stealing your tank and putting it in the red wash causing it to get a slight pink tinge. I wasn't thinking. _

_Sorry Chief for leaving you to lead a resistance. You took care of my bird and you know how much it means to me, I'm such a coward to leave you to get these people organized but you are a better people leader than me, I know you don't think so but you are, rank be damned._

_Sorry Cally for not being around to help with the baby and stuff. I'm sure the baby will be fine, and Chief will be fine. I'm sorry I'll get to miss him, don't know why you were thinking of letting me near him but I'm sorry I'll miss it. _

_Sorry Sam for not being there when you wake up like I know you will. Sorry for not being there like the wife you deserve. Sorry for taking so long to rescue you, sorry for sleeping with Lee on the night of ground breaking ceremony even though you never found out about it. _

Kara slowly lost her balance and fell forward through the branches, leaving a few minor cuts and bruises and the last thing she remembers is someone catching her in their arms. Those arms felt like comfort, home, security, and the idea she would be okay even if she closed her eyes. She also knew those arms were a lie. A voice whispered comfort in her ear even though she couldn't place whose voice it was.

But it felt pretty nice, like someone was saving her from the nightmares her imagination had dreamt up to answer the question of what happens now. She knew they were just giving her a false sense of security, luring her into cooperating until she was under control so her interrogators would not harm her.

Kara wonders for a moment what kind of tactics they will use on her, but before her mind can even dredge up her POW training from War College, her mind fully blackens out, allowing her to sink into a peaceful oblivion that didn't have cylons in it. Just comfortable blackness.

And really, how can you screw up blackness?

* * *

><p><strong>Laura-<strong>

Laura sat in the underground tunnels with a blanket wrapped around herself. She knew she would have to have energy for the coming day, day 2 of the cylon invasion, but she somehow couldn't sleep. Fancy that, former President who had made some pretty big calls against the cylons being afraid they would try and find her to kill her, she was only mildly worried about. It was the people out there risking their lives probably at this very moment she was more worried about. She knew a resistance was needed, an insurgency if you will, and yet, she had never before felt so strongly, the anticipation of which soldiers would return and which ones wouldn't.

The trap door clanged open, and threw some of the early morning light down onto the caves. Laura stood up, still in clothes from the day before and rushed over to greet them. Sam in a bed nearby, moved in fear the cylons would kill him for the Caprica resistance efforts, struggled to sit up to greet them.

Laura diverted her attention from the door to the former pyramid player, carefully helping the healing man sit up, she scanned the people coming in, exhausted and yet, exhilarated. They were coming down from a battle high, that was apparent enough. There was also a sadness to their features, and fear. Fear was extremely apparent in their faces.

When the last man entered and the door shut, Laura did a quick head count. 19 people. That was one less than had gone out, it was only the first mission of the insurgents and they had already lost someone. She knew they were facing almost impossible odds, but it was still a blow to moral they had lost someone already.

"Where's Kara?" Sam said before a coughing fit overtook him. They were not as violent anymore, a good sign Cottle said, but they still hurt Laura's heart. She wished he was better, in the year she had been on New Caprica she had come to like Samuel T. Anders very much.

Chief looked lost and it hit Laura like a ton of bricks. Kara had gotten lost. So many questions, did they know she was dead, was she just taken, missing or?

Hendricks, one of Sam's pyramid players walked over to him, and began very gently. "She was with us all the way to the trees. Than we lost her, it was so confusing and she said not to look for anyone, get to the rendezvous, and than get back, she has to be alive, the only people who got shot that night were toasters. There were no more gun shots than the ones the Dorals took." The man tried to comfort his team captain but it didn't do much good.

Sam looked lost, and Laura knew why. They all looked lost, and she felt lost. Starbuck was someone who always came back, proof that no matter how large the odds, you could get out of it. It didn't matter what it was, she was always alive and fighting again another day. Toasters hated her, she was a heroine to everyone. The people needed that, but now she was gone, and it scared them, it made everything seem more fragile. With the loss of the Colonel and herself, everything seemed more fragile.

"We are going to get her back Sam. We'll start searching the area we saw her last in and go from there." Chief said confidently, it was hard on him, you could see it. Everyone loved Starbuck, even if it was in a grudging fashion. The world was not right without her.

"One of those cylons was chasing me, but than it switched to the person I think was her," One of the knuckle draggers spoke up quietly. Laura looked in the young man who they called Jammer's face. She saw truth there, and why would he lie about this? It was a young woman's life at stake here, despite that very same woman's idea that she wasn't worth it, something Laura had heard her say more than once.

Becoming suspicious of your neighbors already Laura? She chided herself, these people had proved themselves to be on their side many times over, there was to be no questioning of loyalties or the cylons would not have to rip them apart, they would do it themselves in fear of neighbors. It would be like what had happened after it had been revealed cylons could imitate humans.

"Which cylon?" she asked, hardly wanting to know the answer to her question. Kara had a knack for pissing people off, cylons even more so. She had talked to Kara on Kobol and learned about the blonde woman, and the Simon. For a moment Laura wonders if they will start that again, the farms. If so, they would take Maya and may find Hera. And the cylons having that baby was something that could not happen.

The Knuckledragger bits his lip and the entire room is silent waiting for his answer, "Leoben" he whispers, and the room takes note "Yeah that was his name, the one who called himself Leoben."

At that single moment, Laura's blood ran cold. "Are you sure?" She asked. Maybe Leoben had a personal vendetta, she had been the one having him tortured for information until Laura herself had intervened, opting for a different method. Or maybe it was the farms like they had on Caprica? She mentally shuddered, having noted the Captain's scars and demanded an explanation to both of them. Kara after much convincing give up some grudging details, it horrified Laura. She had always been one for women's choice, it was a twisted thing of them to do, low even for cylons.

On the other hand, it could be a combination of both, try a tactic like they had used with Helo and Sharon, get them to fall in love. As much as she can't see it happening, that is not to say they wouldn't try, Leoben apparently already knew a disturbing among about her, judging by her reaction to something he said to her in the interrogation.

Any reason they may have for taking her, Laura knew it was not because they were being nice. No, they wanted her, she had listened to some of the footage they had from Leoben's interview, and he thought she was special for some reason. She wondered if she really wanted to know what that reason was.

"I'm going to take a peek outside to see if it is safe for you to leave, tonight we will meet again to discuss Captain Thrace-Anders" The former President used both names just incase and climbed up the ladder outside, Chief went with her, the men downstairs talking to the ill pyramid player to rouse his spirits and get him to help plan the next move.

"It's unsettling for you isn't it?" Laura asked the deck Chief turned insurgent. He nodded along with her, not trusting himself to say anymore, she knew what he was thinking; if they could get Starbuck they could get anybody. What would the use her for, bargaining tool, symbol of what happened to resistance fighters? Her mind gave her horrible images and Laura didn't like them.

They replaced the rug and went back outside into the early morning light. Today you could at least see this planet's sun, and maybe it would not be so damp and so cold. Maybe.

"How is it Cally?" She asked Chief's very pregnant wife who had been waiting outside, all this strain could not be good for the baby. The question is broad, fit for Cally's interpretation, the former President always admired the spitfire of a girl. She was one of few females who was in a very male dominated field, had bit the ear of a prisoner who'd attacked her aboard the Astral Queen, and was a very sweet girl.

"There a group of toasters coming," She observed and pointed off into the distance; Laura felt fear grip her in its icy claws. It was in the general direction of where the resistance had run.

From a distance you could tell the group was heavily guarded. 8 metal Centurions, a raider flying overhead, all to guard a few skin jobs. But it surely couldn't be for just the skin-jobs. No, it had to be something else. Or someone else.

She waited while the group came into the tent city, hopefully empty handed. It was a futile hope she knew and yet she could not stop it.

A slight gasp escaped Laura when she realized her hopes had been dashed. In the group, which was easy to see as they passed due to the humans scuttled out of their way, not wanting to be killed, there were only three cylons in the group. There was a Simon, whom Kara had brought back a photo and description of from Caprica, who seemed to be the doctor, or scientist of the cylons, and two Leoben copies around him.

One Leoben had a scar right above where the Admiral had given him one, and the other Leoben, the one in between Simon and the scarred Leoben, the other Leoben was the one who Chief, Cally and a huge number of people were staring at.

"Frack." Cally stated, an understatement for sure, because in the Leoben's arms, was a person, unconscious, blonde hair everywhere, a part of a symbol for Caprica on her arm. In his arms was Kara.


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you all for your comments, and I'm sorry this took longer than I had planned, I had difficulty getting this chapter to work, but on the bright side we'll see Kara again in Chapter 7.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Six- <strong>

**Leoben-**

He could feel the glares running off his back from the former President and many of the people. No scratch that, all of them. He knew what they all thought; he was off to torture their favorite smart-mouthed pilot. Nothing could be farther from the truth but somehow telling them he wasn't going to hurt her probably wouldn't sink in to them. People believed what they wanted to believe, fact of life number one. Besides, they wouldn't believe he loved her anyways, so in the end even if they had the truth they would continue in believing whatever they wanted because it suited their own purposes. That his race was monsters.

Were his people really monsters? Well, they had killed billions of people and counting but monsters in and of themselves? Like the humans some of them were good and some of them like Jared were monsters. True monsters, and should be killed for the safety of everyone or at least put away so they couldn't hurt anyone. But who was he to pass judgment, God had created him for a reason, Leoben may not know what that reason was but Leoben knew he had one. God had created all things for a purpose.

He looked over at the building being constructed, its progress was coming along rapidly, Centurions had no need to sleep so they had worked all through the night, the building going much faster than he had expected. Granted the progress was hindered by the fact it was designed to be confusing to someone who did not know it, the halls were labyrinths and you could easily go in circles. He knew it would slow down production but after they got the actual building up it was more of put things where they belong and it would be done. Paint it, small housekeeping things, nowhere near as time consuming as building the actual structure.

He silently conferred with a Centurion as he walked back to the air strip, checking on the time limit the machine estimated, and yet he was so much more than that. More than a machine, he was a living breathing tool of war yes, but there was that word, living, something living out of battle armor. The Centurion was as much alive as anything else. It was really quite brilliant whoever had re-designed them from the original models. Anyway, he forced his mind back at hand and nodded as the Centurion replied back into the data stream it was projected to be two and a half days for his apartment for himself and Kara, included paint dry time and putting everything together, and nailing anything that could be used as a weapon or projectile.

Leoben thanked him, it was something that was not only him, Caprica did it and so did Boomer, but no other model did. Leoben wondered why, they deserved common curtsey, and it was his belief if they treated the robots like the humans had they would have their own uprising. Cavil just told him to shut up. Leoben knew it was folly, that same attitude was why they had killed humanity. So he made it a point to talk to the hybrid, the centurions, even Raiders. The Ones still thought he had more than a few screws loose, metaphorically speaking since he did not have actual screws, but Leoben continued on anyway.

Leoben went over his plan once more in his head. He would first bring Kara to the basestar in orbit, keep her there so she would be safe from explosions like her team had set off, but keep her asleep. No, he first wanted her to wake up in the apartment, maybe she would not feel like a prisoner that way. It was a futile hope, he knew it was a futile hope, but at least it was hopefully not going to put in her head she was going to be harmed and/or experimented on, he would not let anything, cylon or human, harm her. Leoben promised himself that, she had had more than enough pain.

He and the Simon walked into the heavy Raider, Jared opting to stay behind on the planet. Something Leoben was thankful for, her didn't want Jared anywhere near Kara. Not now, not ever, even before Jared had decided to bother him with what he had said Leoben would have never let them met if he had his way.

His mind dredged up the memory before he could stop it, _Leoben was doodling a Mandela that matched hers with her own for a model when Jared sauntered in, even wearing a leather jacket to look the part like some human street dealer tough guy, the scar having been placed back above his eye standing out and making him look, sinister, evil, twisted. He was the stuff of nightmares about the cylons. _

"_Hey baby bro," Jared smirked, he knew it bothered him but Leoben was too much of a pacifist to think of hitting him for it, or even having him punished despite the fact Leoben was technically older and had seniority and more authority being his line's representative. Punishment never would have happened anyway, Cavil liked him and that seemed to be what really mattered, even though the cylons were technically a democracy. _

_Leoben hadn't answered, far off in his own little world with the Mandela trying to find out its meaning to Kara and why it appeared so much, in her art, dreams he had, visions, as he carefully made the pattern on his own paper. It only proceeded to bother his fellow brother, never able to stand being ignored, who stalked over to the table where Leoben worked and knocked a can of red paint over onto Leoben's almost finished re-creation of the painting. _

_Leoben paused a moment only to glare at him and than began an attempt to salvage what of the paint he could while Jared just smirked like a spoiled child getting what they wanted, all the while waiting for him to finish. He sighed when he looked down at his painting; the almost perfect match of the mandela was now marred by a huge amount of red on the painting. Red was in the painting, just not covering up Ninety-six percent of the circle. _

"_Do you need something Jared." His voice clipped, neat and under control and that only made Jared smile. Jared had a talent for bringing out the worst in many of the models and because of such Leoben had talked to Cavil many times about having him boxed due to him being a liability, Sixes agreed, Eights agreed, the rest of the Twos agreed, Threes, Fours and Fives, Only the Cavils said no and that made him being boxed a no. Cylon law stated you had to have a unanimous vote to have someone boxed, and nothing made that vote from Cavil say yes._

"_Your viper pilot." Jared said grinning, grinning evilly. Leoben shook his head not liking what was implied and where this was apparently going, and in that moment resolved to never let Jared speak to her. He would not let him in within 20 feet of her if he could help it or unless he had to. _

_His silence only encouraged Jared. "I mean it," he had seen all of Leoben's memories from the download and knew of his vision. He knew it would bother him, and yet, Leoben could not help but think he was serious about his threat. "Whether she wants to be there or not doesn't matter, and if she resists it would only be more fun." Leoben shuddered slightly, the act seen by his brother who only moved closer and spoke in a lower tone. Leoben wanted to make him go away, to stop, but Jared was on a roll. _

"_But I wouldn't start there; no I think it would be over a time period all ending at that moment. First I'd hurt her you know, tie her up and hit her, nothing too bad, just enough to make her whimper, maybe scream. Maybe I'll shove her in a pool of water, see if she can swim, pull her down below the waters' surface at random intervals, Maybe I'd kick her, play mindgames, not feed her, keep her locked and tied up and than, after that than I'd have her. Get to play with her, most certainly because she doesn't want me too." Leoben's knuckles grabbed the paint can's handle and gripped it so hard his knuckles were sheet white. But the more Jared smirked and let the entire prospect of what the other two had said the more Leoben's self control slipped. _

_Leoben's hands weren't his anymore and lighting fast he brought the paint can he only than realized he'd pick up straight to Jared's face. The impact was strong, enough to push his face back into his head. His brother was dead instantly but it took Leoben a few minutes to realize what he'd done, blood pooling on the floor, the offending paint can in his hands dripping with blood when Caprica walked in. _

"_I know what he did and heard what he said." She said quietly and Leoben just started, partly flushed; only now realizing she must have been listening to their entire encounter. It was before he and the woman had become good friends, she was just a war hero, and he was just a agent who'd got caught, tortured, flushed out an air lock and fell for a woman he wasn't going to get anytime soon if ever. _

_She noted his silence and kept on talking, "I think you were right in doing it. Anyone who thinks of doing that to anyone else is worse than a monster." And Leoben was reminded of the fact Sixes were very beautiful. He knew she most have run into her fair share of humans who would do the same thing, some of it anyways. _

_Leoben started to extend his hand politely for an introduction, he had a thing for being polite, when he realized he had red paint, bright red paint and some blood all over his hands. "I'd shake your hand but" Leoben trailed off as he looked down sorrowfully at his hands. Instead of bring what he had done back up he changed the subject"They call me Leoben."_

_Every cylon knew who the other was through programming, which was which copy and whatnot. But each copy was special, and they knew what was going on with others through the data stream. Caprica smiled, he was unusual in his introduction. _

"_They call me Caprica." she answered and held out her hand anyways. He shook it, despite the paint and the blood, and the two were friends, brother and sister in a true sense of the word, despite a fuming Jared and the sentiment he'd deserved it ill received by the rebel too. He promised Leoben would regret it. Or more accurately, Kara would regret it. _

He jerked out of the memory and the thoughts surrounding it with a start. No, he would not let that happen to her, he'd protect her, and he'd do anything to keep her safe. She was safer with him than she was on the Galatica, or Pegasus, or even some kind of secret tunnel in the ground on the other side of the planet with missiles defense system. Because he could watch over her, and keep her from his brother and the models who would harm her, like a six she had met in the Delphi museum for instance, who wanted revenge.

Settling against a seat in the raider he held the woman, the woman he loved, in his arms, her body warm against his. She was asleep still and would remain that way for a while with multiple injections of the drug, Leoben hated doing it but it was the only way to keep her from freaking out and keeping her calm until the apartment was ready. He did not have the luxury of the apartment already set up so he'd had to improvise and when the opportunity to catch her had arrived he took it, he knew she would be much harder to catch afterwards and it would take much more time. God had given him an opportunity, he could not waste it.

He silently stroked her hair while the Heavy Raider, piloted by a Six, went toward one of the two basestars in orbit. Simon was doing something else and he just held the viper pilot close, breathing in her scent and taking comfort by her very presence. She's here now; the wait had been worth it. Sooner than ever before, she would be his.

He felt the edge of his mind begin to darken, and he recognized the feel of a vision coming. He had found it terrifying at first, for days sitting in a seemingly endless state of fear, but had come to get used to it over time. They would often leave him with a slight headache, one that lasted for hours, but the information gleaned was well worth it to him and often the others. Not one single model could explain it but they had stopped doubting him. Most of them anyway.

Leoben began to feel the familiar tug of a vision at the corner of his eyes and he went into it, not questioning it or afraid. It was only a vision and represented a possible future outcome.

Not everything he saw came to pass, things changed, events changed, and the story changed again, the stream shifted, a person went down a different path. He was only seeing a possible future and a possible outcome.

Leoben let the current show him what needed to be shown and the vision began.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

Sam didn't know what to do. He didn't know if Kara was dead, alive, captured or anything. It seemed unreal she was MIA, as though she would shimmy down the hatch and announce 'gotcha' to the worried congregation and to him, smiling that impish grin of hers green eyes sparkling.

Kara was Sam's world, she was all he had to hang on to, without her he was just a former pyramid player turned militant, a civilian but a fighter nonetheless. He pulled himself up and shakily got to his feet, the worst was over, he could walk now. He was determined to do that much.

Jean looked at him and he knew she knew what he was going through. Kara and Jean had become fast friends and drinking buddies back after the rescue mission and when Jean went down to New Caprica they had all kinds of fun together.

Without stopping or any kind of hesitation, she put her gun down, she'd been the sniper that killed Doral, and became a living walking stick for her former Team Captain. Sam grunted in thanks, not wanting to waste any energy in talking. Jean just nodded in understanding, her red hair held firm by her pony-tail.

She helped him up the ladder and replaced the rug. Before going any farther a bout of coughing overtook him and Jean smacked him on the back, it may have been a move for choking but it helped a bit. He was grateful she was there, Sam had become close friends with many people in that room, but Jean was, Jean was like a sister to him.

The red-head looked a little worried and for the first time started to voice her concern to him, "I think if Kara was here she'd want you to rest." using Kara to hopefully get him back to the tunnel to keep him from being seen and making his illness worse by over-exerting himself. Sam shook his head, thinking if their roles were reversed Kara would already be looking for him. Not thinking, knowing his wife would be out there, swearing at toasters, searching every place possible and many places that weren't for him.

He went out of the tent, blinking his eyes unaccustomed to the light just in time to see a group of toasters arrive at the edge of camp. It was hard, seeing them up close like that, everything in him screamed for him to kill them, and he found his hands acting like they were gripping a weapon of their own accord. But there was nothing he could do; the cylons had them, even more so than they had back on Caprica, this was different. This was worse, far worse.

As the figures came closer he saw three skin jobs and one of them was holding something. What was so important that skin job needed a heavy raider, eight tin cans and two other skins to guard it?

But when he saw he felt he was going to be sick, in a completely different way. Waves of nausea rolled through his stomach and announced their presence and if he wasn't so determined to lay low and just be an observer, which his illness only let him be, he would have thrown up whatever was in his stomach right then and there. No, this couldn't be right, no no no, not again. No, they couldn't take her away. She was his wife Godsdamn it. They had said no one would be harmed, even though she had been trying to blow up a basestar he wasn't thinking rationally. His self control went out the window.

Jean reached over and grabbed his arm, knowing him better than he would have liked. He tried to fight her off but she only hung on tighter. "No Sam, charging like a drunken idiot will not get her back, we need to do this rationally." He weakly fought her, before conceding she was right and dropping his arms, running a hand through his hair, worried.

But why let them know they had her at all? Why not just dangle the bait of the idea of her infront of them, see if he would bite. They had their marriage bands on their arms for fracks sake, why parade her through the streets, to get rid of morale, was that it?

A cough racked his frame once more and the model that held her in his arms, Leoben or something, slightly smiled. The cylon caught his gaze and held it, the thing's ice blue eyes looked him with disdain. Like he was nothing, like the fact that he was married to the woman in that man's, no not man's, machine's, arms wasn't true or worth a damn. But it was true and Sam was clearly not very happy about where Kara had wound up.

The blonde cylon held onto her, pulling her slightly closer to him, causing her head to rest on his shoulder. It was almost, no it was a possessive gesture, but why? What would a toaster do that for? Why did they want her anyway, if she was a problem why kidnap her? Surely they would have killed her, but it seemed they were off to torture her? But if they were going to hurt her way act all possessive about her, like, like a kid guarding his toy from someone else, as much as he hated the analogy.

There was another heavy raider at the foot of base-camp, and the humans were hushed to see what would happen. Everyone knew Starbuck, though it was due to admiration or plain hatred Sam didn't know. Starbuck, not always Kara but Starbuck was impossible to ignore. She was a face they talked about, and now for sure there would be people talking after today's little parade through camp.

She was loaded into the heavy raider while one of the Leobens sporting a nasty scar on his face opted to stay behind. The Leoben who had Kara in his arms, having refused to put her down, looked over the crowd for a brief moment and Sam couldn't shake the feeling the cylon was looking for him again.

Through the crowd Leoben seemed to notice Samuel again, zeroing in on him in mere seconds. The man, no, it turned around and started right back at Samuel and it was unnerving in the least. How he knew right where he was, how he seemed to know Sam was glaring at him. Leoben smiled, small smile, than cheekily waved.

Jean, having seen the entire encounter grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him back with his hands balled into fists, Sam was going to kill him, again and again until he got Kara back in one piece. His imagination was dredging up horrors of what they might do to her, like one of those farm things on Caprica, or maybe something else. Sam didn't know, but he needed her. He loved her, she was the smartest military officer they'd had but now she was gone. She and the Colonel were gone.

Leoben finally turned away and entered the raider which shut with a soft hiss. Sam started to cough again and Cally was nearby, having seen him, off in the distance were the Chief and the former President.

"You okay?" The former deckhand asked quietly, concern etched on her face. Sam shook his head and Cally looked lost. Sam didn't know what to do, couldn't play pyramid, couldn't do anything. Everything reminded him of her and he was sick for frack's sake, what could he do really, what could he do right now?

His eyes went back to the cylon raider which was slowly leaving the atmosphere out of sight and into the confines of space. A basestar was up there that was for sure, so they were taking her there. And than where? Another basestar, another star system, across the universe?

A wave of hopelessness cascaded on the sick man. How in the name of the Gods was he supposed to rescue her from up there? He would do it or die trying but first he needed a plan, and resources and people and intel and

"Come on Sam," the former President said quietly, guiding him back into the tent. "You need rest, we'll get her back, have no fear of that, she'll survive and we'll see her again. She'll be okay." she sounded more like she was trying to reassure herself more than Sam but Sam didn't mind, he couldn't care anymore. The only thought that went through his head was that those bastards had her. And it was nearly impossible to get her back.


	7. Chapter 7

Hey guys, thank you so much for reading my story. I hope you like chapter 7. We do a couple days time skip because there wasn't much else to talk about when Kara was out for the count just in case anyone was wondering. And I would also like to say thank you for the comments submitted to the story, it makes me smile,

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Seven-<strong>

**Kara-**

When she woke up she felt warm. She could honestly say she felt safe, secure, and comfortable. Far more comfortable than she had in a very long time. It felt safe here, the mattress soft below her body and the covers not scratchy like the ones in her rack or cot with Sam, who did help make up for it. The kind of sheets she'd never be able to afford on her salary before the attacks unless she was willing to scrap a month's paycheck just for the pillowcases.

She fitfully dozed between wakefulness and a nap, not true sleep but not true wakefulness either. She was somewhere in-between, that place where reality hasn't crashed in and totally burst your happy bubble, and it felt really really nice. Not to worry or be under the stress she'd been under lately, why had she been stressing out lately anyways, it wasn't because Sam was sick, no he had started to get better there had to be another reason.

Problem was Kara couldn't recall it right now though to be honest she selfishly wanted the ignorance as long as she could have it. It stood on the edge of her mind, hovering like a black cloud or the way humidity did right before a thunder storm back on Caprica. She decided not to pay any attention to it, choosing to ignore it for right now. The most logical idea that she could have ended up somewhere so nice was she was dreaming. Her mind had dreamt this place up because no way were there was any kind of mattress or sheets this nice left in the entire fracking galaxy.

She may not know much about how the human mind worked, but she knew it conjured things up under extreme stress or when it would sometimes choose to ignore reality, it was why her imaginary friend named Jacob had come into existence and not been dropped until she was 10. She had always had a rather vivid imagination. So when you put two and two together, she was dreaming because it was a much nicer alternative to whatever the worry, the anxiety, the fear over what was going on that she couldn't quite recall.

It may be the coward's way she thought, going into a dream like this, but Kara reasoned if she was a prisoner somewhere than surely she would be in a cell, or knowing what they had tried last time, a hospital bed. Surely she would wake up there, not a real bed, with a very nice mattress, soft sheets and whatnot, prisons didn't have that stuff. Or if she was not a prisoner at all she would wake up with Sam, back in their tent on that cot that sometimes barely deserved the name, with old blankets pulled around them and the gentle murmur of people nearby.

She grudgingly decided it was time to take in her dream room, so she hopped out of bed and her hands instantly reached out and clung to the bed-post for support. She was a bit shaky on her feet for some weird reason. It had not happened in a very long time. Kara wasn't quite sure why she was so shaky, but she gripped the steel bar, a plain slab of metal made up the headboard.

Slowly she took stock of the bedroom place, and the first thing she noted was the muted colors. Soft grays and blues mainly, sometimes there was a splash of vibrant colors but not really. Her imagination must not have been so imaginative after all she reasoned. It looked like one of those fancy apartment places one of her co-workers had always been looking at in some house decor magazine.

The room was a fairly decent size, with a door leading out and two sliding doors, side by side, presumably a his and her closet. It was exactly like her apartment with Zak. Only the colors were different. But it was still the same shape of the room, same size, the furniture was where it had been arranged. The only difference was the colors, and it was a great deal fancier than the stuff she had.

The bedspread was a soft blue gray like color and the sheets were cream white. The headboard was some kind of silver metal that had been polished till it shone. The nightstand was some dark wood color, with a good sized drawer and metal legs, again the same metal silver color, and again polished till it shone. There was a nightstand on each side of the bed.

.

The carpet was soft below her feet, another light blue and felt very cushiony. Kara had no idea how her mind had dreamt up this place, she'd never been near luxury like this, as a kid her mom could barely afford the clothes on her back because she drank so much and pilots and instructors never made a huge amount anyways, but this, this was like pent house comfy or what she imagined it'd be like. You know, if pent houses and stuff still existed anyways.

She was still in her clothes from the other day when she'd been doing something, something very important. It hovered on the edge of her memory but she couldn't remember it either, not right now. Her combat boots, as if she would wear or want to wear any other kind, lay at the foot of the bed with a fresh pair of socks. There was a painting on the wall that consisted of dark blues, seemed to fit with the rest of the theme. There were navy curtains as well, the painting was an array of dark blue colors and shapes and Starbuck wonders where she'd seen it before. It, like whatever else she was trying to remember, hovers at the edge of her mind, and she pushes and pushes for it to come into focus.

Than it clicks, she's seen it before because she painted it. She remembers that night vividly. She just came back from Zak's funeral, and had been so sad, and angry at herself and depressed. She'd thought his old man was nice for offering her a spot on Galactica, but it was the only bright spot there had been, she just wanted to forget. Forget the pain of seeing the casket lowered, the only person to ever love Kara Thrace going into the ground.

So out had come that painting, created under the effects of grief, pain at the knowledge she'd killed the only man who loved her and lots and lots of ambrosia.

Blinking away a tear that had come up suddenly after staring at the painting for a full five minutes, she decided to see what the closets held before she ventured outside, she wasn't sure if she wanted to know what her mind had decided to conjure up to be outside just yet. Maybe it was what hovered on the edge of her mind, waiting to be recognized, and spring the truth on her in a terrible fashion.

Kara being Kara and wanting to avoid as much pain as possible, a lesson that stuck with her from early on, she could take pain but never wanted it, never craved it, opted to stay and explore her supposed mental fantasy.

She slid back the door to the closet that had been hers and was shocked at how much it resembled to the one she had remembered from Caprica. Clothes hung up in the same way, even her little forest green dress she'd planned to wear to her student pilots' graduation ceremony she ended up not going to because of Zak's death.

Shoes lined up the shoe rack on the floor, the one fancy pair she had gotten for that evening and the rest an assortment of running shoes, comfort not pretty kind of shoes. Some she knew and some she didn't. There was a dresser too which had drawers she cautiously opened in case something might sprang out on her. Socks, feminine stuff she had always kept in the bottom drawer was there, some shirts and things she would sleep in at night. All there, folded up nice and neat.

A part of her was getting unnerved but another part wondered when she was going to have to wake up. But something bad was coming, or was already here, she could feel it, she just couldn't remember what it was.

A box on the floor caught her attention and she bent down and carefully picked it up, settling down on the floor with her legs crossed and flipped through the contents of the box. Photos of her and her Dad, a picture of her parents, looking happy and the way people should be remembered, her and Zak, lots of pictures of her and Zak, her leaving the academy, her father's music stuff, note sheets, little notes Zak gave her.

Some of her art was in the box too, paintings she had done, some with the mandala she liked to draw as a kid. A whole bunch of stuff that was personal to her, some of her mom's stuff, all kinds of pictures, art, little mementos she'd saved over the years.

It was a trip down memory lane; she wasn't sure how long she sat in the closet she thought her mind had dreamt up, going over the things she used to have. After a while she put them all back and shut the lid.

Of all the dreams I've had, this is by far the most realistic, she thought to herself. Kara still thought the entire place was a dream, not real by any means, just a nice place thought up by her mind. A distraction of sorts to keep her from facing the real problem. Whatever that problem may be.

Kara stepped out of the closet and walked over to the next one, not sure what she was supposed to find. After Zak had died she left his closet totally alone, she never went in there, it was left like it had been when he'd left that morning. Waiting for him to come back.

Starbuck pulled the sliding door back, caution be damned, and looked in at what she had come across beyond the door.

It was a man's closet, that much was obvious to anyone. Not Zak's stuff though, it was someone else's stuff. For the first time her mind began to consider the possibility it wasn't a dream. That she actually was awake and this was not some fabrication of her sub-conscious while she was asleep. But how was that right, if she was awake she'd been in her tent with Sam. Right?

She carefully picked through everything, much more careful as though anything could explode the second she touched it. She carefully moved through the articles of clothing until she came to one in the back, and fell back into the doorway in shock, her mind dredging up bad memories of the shirt and the man, the thing that had worn it. It was the exact same shirt Leoben had worn when she'd tortured him.

How likely was it her mind was playing tricks on her? It all felt real, and to be honest with herself she would have dreamt up something different, so maybe it was real? The idea made her sick to her stomach, Leoben again. Leoben who knew all about her mom with no one telling him. Leoben and his one true God. Leoben and his special destiny and the idea she was special. Leoben the cylon.

The fog on the edge of her mind lifted, finally, and she remembered everything, the invasion, the basestar, the tree, and than the rest is black. Just black, she doesn't remember anything beyond that point. Surely she would have woken up, or remembered a piece of what happened next?

The easy answer was she, of course, had been drugged, but that did not explain her current location. Where was she if this was real and not a weird place her mind dreamed up or something? Where was everyone else? Where was the rest of the people who'd been out there, Jean, Chief, Jammer, where were they?

Kara quickly backed out of the closet, and back into the bedroom. She looked at the table against the wall with a vase on it and tried to pick the vase up. It was, upon closer inspection, nailed to the table. Nailed. She than tried the table all with no luck, it was nailed to the floor.

That this was 'just a dream' theory looked more and more discredited, after all, if this was a nightmare she would have woken up by now, besides, her nightmares did not included being in a nice bedroom all by herself. No, this was real and it made terrifying sense. It had to be real, but the big question was why?

What was the purpose of being here? Starbuck couldn't see one? Why kidnap her and then stick her in a very nice place to sleep? There was a bigger picture here, but there was nothing in this room she could do to find it out.

So all that was left was to go out the other door and face whatever was on the other side. No backing down and no looking back; that was what she did right? When she left to return to Caprica, when she left Lee that night, survivor's choice, make a choice and don't look back. One of the few things she could say Tigh had honestly helped her out with.

Her hand gripped the door handle, she felt more alive than she had in a long time. It was odd, the threat of her worst fears beyond that door and yet, she was oddly glad about it. She was a soldier, and no amount of time playing civilian could take that away, and she felt like a soldier again. It was a twisted thing, and yet.

She began to plan, unknown enemy force, no weaponry, except the knife in my boot but I'm going to save that, she decided, for when she really needed it. It was a small knife, not very large as fighting knives could go, and maybe her enemy didn't know it was there. So it made sense to save the advantage, if they wanted her dead they would have killed her already right?

Slowly, she turned the door handle, green eyes searching for anything that was going to attack her. But what she saw, she didn't expect. She didn't expect at all.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

Three days now. Three days tonight from the time he had shot a tranquilizer dart into her leg and she fell out of the tree. Less than five hours from when she was taken from the basestar and moved down here into their apartment.

Fifteen minutes past the time Simon predicted her to wake up. Leoben knew very well that she may have decided to do some exploring first, he was not going to sit and watch her until she woke up, no, he had decided that would bother her far too much. Or Simon was just wrong about something. It was best to let her sleep and wait until she came around naturally.

The waiting however made him antsy. It was minutes away from when he would get to see her again, he had waited a very long time for her, but it never had seemed like more waiting until now. The anticipation was hardly bearable. The clock on the wall making a soft sound as it counted out the seconds never seemed louder.

Despite the apartment have been able to be ready a day ago, there were certain things he needed to modify, such as the iron barred door in the apartment hallway, no other model had that, no other model needed to. Next there was the business of nailing down all furniture so she could not hurt him, or more importantly herself with it. Make sure anything sharp was in a drawer or something of the like was locked away, and it went by fingerprint lock, and needed a pulse from said fingerprint to open it.

Leoben had no doubt should she want to try and kill him she would find a way to do it, she was very resourceful, she had been the one that used a downed Cylon raider to get herself off a moon and back to Galactica after all. There had to be a whole bunch of other things she had done that God had chosen not to reveal to him. One thing was for sure, she would be able to turn ordinary things into weapons.

He sat in a chair that faced the bed room door, and he just sat, waiting for her in a dark colored polo shirt, that was what they were called right, he'd never been one for understanding human fashion, and a book in his hands. Trying to read, only he wasn't really reading, it was more of busy work to keep himself from crossing the room and yanking the door open to see that she was still breathing.

He fitfully returned to his book on psychology, the book being rather fascinating but now was not the time, when he glanced up for the millionth time in however many minutes, the knob looked different. As in someone was on the other side holding it.

Leoben bated his breath and he pretended to still be reading, all the while his light blue eyes glued to the silver handle. It seemed to take a lifetime to turn, and the door slowly slid open, revealing what he had waited for.

Kara was awake, the clothes she had worn for the basestar mission slightly ruffled but in the end they looked fine. A pair of dark colored cargo pants, with their pockets emptied, a black jacket over her black tank, her hair was much longer than he had remembered it, falling to her shoulders in a wonderfully messy way he had instantly liked on her. It fit her, she was more beautiful than he had remembered, and his eyes took in the sight of her, starved from not seeing her awake for so long. You could look at her asleep, but she looked so much more alive awake. It was in Leoben's view a breath-taking effect of her's.

He slowly put the book away, marking his page and putting it cover down and looked her back in the beautiful green eyes. They narrowed at him and he could guess what was going through her mind. But nothing could be farther from the truth, the thought process being he would hurt her, the truth being he loved her.

"Did you sleep alright?" he asks and the question seemed to throw her off her guard. Within milliseconds she fixed it, her expression remaining neutral. She shook her head yes, not trusting herself to speak until she found out whatever it was she wanted to know.

"That's good," he answered, more than happy to fill in the gaps into conversation, she would talk to him eventually, she would have to, She had Starbuck in her, and she was a person who couldn't be ignored. As for Kara, she had been ignored far too much, Leoben would never ignore her either.

"Are you hungry?" he asked her, blue eyes locking on the green ones before she looked away, and didn't answer him. Not a shake of the head or anything, just plain out refusal to acknowledge him.

Leoben was not daunted by her behavior, he knew it would be hard; He replaced the book on the coffee table and walked into the kitchen area, opening up a few cupboards thinking about what to get her to eat. Kara didn't have any food allergies which was good as he didn't not want to bring up any memories of what his idiot brother Simon and a Six named Ashley did on Caprica, bringing her because of a food allergy would not bode well. He settled on cheese and crackers, surely she would eat that.

As he set to work cutting up the block of cheese into smaller squares she slowly began to walk around the apartment, going from the place she had stood as she mulled over the information of where she was, he noticed her trying a vase on the table in the foyer, and he watched her expression change slightly as she realized it was nailed down. It was clear she thought she was a prisoner, but that wasn't true. She was being kept her for her own protection, from cylons, and other humans. Out there she could get hurt and would anger many cylons for sure, this was safe, she was with him and safe.

When he was all done cutting up the cheddar he carefully washed the knife and replaced it back into the drawer. He could sense her watching out of the corner of his eyes but did not look up. Nope he was going to keep up this act of this was perfectly normal. He did not want her to hurt herself with a knife, and being in a new place and her talent for being unpredictable meant he was not taking any chances. Replacing the knife back into the drawer he reached into a cupboard and pulled out a box of crackers.

Setting some of them on the plate with the cheese he walked over to another cabinet and pulled out two glasses. He filled both with fresh clean water, and set one at each chair at the table. After he sit them on the glass surface he walked back to the kitchen where Leoben picked up the plate of cheese and the crackers and set them down at her place at the table, and sat in the chair at the other side.

For a long while neither of them did much of anything, he just sat there, sipping his glass of water, watching her and thinking while she went from room to room. She did not understand what was going on and the knowledge she would either wait to find out through observation, which he doubted as she was highly curious or would ask him eventually was a reoccurring though in his mind.

After five minutes, his patience was rewarded. Her bare feet padded across the room and she carefully eased the chair out to sit on it, as though it might shock her or he would throw the table again. Throwing the table had been an act of showing off to her, she had not understood what he could do, and if he was really being honest, he just wanted an excuse to touch her. He would have killed the small chance of them ever being together had he kissed her or anything of the kind so he went for her throat. He had kept some pressure on it, but not enough to cause damage, nowhere near enough to chock and they both had known it. Just enough to hold her in place, feel her soft skin under his hand until he was yanked backwards by that guard fellow.

Her eyes weren't looking at him; instead they were on the food in front of her. He knew she must be hungry, after a while of not eating and sleeping for so long, drugged or not, anyone would be hungry. Human or cylon didn't matter. He guessed at what she was thinking, was it poisoned, drugged, have some kind of drug in it that will make me talk and give up information on the insurgency?

Leoben knew what she was afraid of and quietly spoke "Go on, you can eat it, it's safe to eat I promise. I wouldn't hurt you Kara. There is nothing on that plate except cheese and crackers." she made no movement, only looked back at him with hate in her eyes. This was going to be difficult. But the result would be worth it, no it would be more than worth it.

Another minute passed, neither of them spoke, Kara just glaring at him and Leoben was looking back at her calmly. He decided to try to get her to eat again, "You need to eat Kara, if you don't want crackers and cheese I can get you something else but you need to eat regardless." The idea she would go on a hunger strike was not an appealing one, she would get weak, and her body needed food. It needed to be healthy, how else would that little blonde girl with striking blue-green eyes and Kara's face come into existence if she tried to kill herself on a hunger strike?

She spoke for the first time since she had arrived in this apartment, since he had seen her at all. "How long have I been here?" it's neat, clipped, the same tone she used when she first met him. It's so good to hear her voice, after so long of not hearing it he had almost forgotten what it sounded like.

"Almost three days." He answered her, his tone open and pleasant compared to her own hostile one. Her green eyes steel and proceed to glare at him again and he knows she is searching for some trick, confirming what he said against what she already knows.

Not being able to find fault with anything she fired off another question, "Why am I here?" There were so many ways to answer that, Leoben considered briefly the idea of telling her to guess, liking where the idea began to go. At the very least, she would be talking. The possibility she would clam up for a while the second she found out why she was here was very likely and Leoben had been far too long without hearing her voice.

"Why do you think you are here?" and Kara proceeded to glare at him farther. If looks could kill he'd be in a downloading tank right now, but other than her gaze her facial expressions went lax, triad blank, one of her favorite games, a game she was very good at according to Boomer. But her eyes were what gave her away, they were one of her most striking features in his opinion.

Another minute passed before she answered, "You want revenge for what happened aboard the Geminion traveler." He shook his head causing her to give her second guess, "You are going to try and get colonial information out of me?" and he shook his head again. Leoben thought there were probably other fears she wasn't voicing at the moment, probably had something to do with what his brother Simon had done for research. But if there was anything to do with it she was not voicing it.

"Than what?" she snapped, frustration seeping from every pore. It clearly bothered her, not being in control or able to know what was going to happen to her and what was going on. She was not going to hurt her pride and ask him, not yet anyways. Her hand gripped the glass of water and she promptly threw its contents at Leoben, causing his shirt to get wet and water dripping from his hair into his face. The glass was not enough to drench him, and yet, he still wasn't too pleased by it. But it was something to be expected, and Leoben could never find it in himself to get mad at her.

Leoben choose not answer, he just got calmly got up and went to the kitchen. Opening a cupboard he removed a towel and began to dry his face off while Kara looked on, angry. It had not been his intention to make her angry. Leoben never wanted to make her angry, or upset, or sad, or any of those bad emotions; he only wanted to bring her happiness, and love.

When he bent down to retrieve another towel, he suddenly sensed her presence behind him. He had not heard her sneak up, or had simply not been paying much attention. She was very close, close enough if he turned around he would most likely bump into her.

"Kara-" he began but was broke off as she moved her hand and pushed his head into the cabinet, causing pain to instantly shot up from impact. Blood dripped from the wound on his forehead into his eyes, the crimson color blurring his vision. Leoben raises his hands, trying to get away from the onslaught and to regain his footing. Before he could recover however her hands were around his neck and she hung on.

His breath was coming in short gasps, his vision began to blacken and his lungs were crying desperately for air. Air he couldn't give because her hands were blocking it from entering his body, blocking him from surviving. He squirms in her embrace, if that was what you could call it. It took a few precious seconds, but finally he is managing to turn around to look at her in her face.

The last thing he does in this body is look into her pretty green eyes. He sees many emotions there, loathing at him, hatred, pain, anger, and fear. She's killing him because she is afraid of what he might do to her.

His blue eyes close, her expression forever burned into his memory. It's a look he could never forget. He opens his eyes one last time only to find they are closing on him again.

And than there was nothing at all.


	8. Chapter 8

I tried a different Point of view this time so, let me know what you think about it, I am still not so sure about it but wanted to try something different. Oh and just a heads up, this chapter is pretty long and I tried to cut it into half but it just didn't feel right stopping off where it would have ended had I cut it into two separate chapters. So it is a long chapter, Anyways, I hope you enjoy.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8-<strong>

**Kara-**

Kara just stared at the body, lifeless on the kitchen floor. Slowly she bent down and put her finger to his neck for a pulse. Dead. Not in the true sense of the word being he was never coming back, because she didn't doubt for a minute he would come back, but this body was dead. And she had bought herself a few hours.

A minute ago he'd been alive, a minute ago he was sitting at that table talking to her drinking a glass of water. Was it really only a minute ago? How many minutes was it now? Two? Three? Four? Was it Fifteen? How long had she been here in the kitchen, above the body of this man, this thing, she corrected herself. How long had it been since she first killed with her hands alone?

The imagery of the incident is painfully clear. Her senses had gone into overdrive as she had done it, making it all perfectly easy to account. First she had snuck up out of her chair, bare feet allowing her to move relatively easy on the floor. If he heard her he had given no sign, just gone to a cabinet next to sink pipes to pull out a towel to get rid of some of the water she had unceremoniously dumped on him.

Than she'd attacked. He called out her name but by then it was too late, she was already committed to it, make a choice and don't look back was what Tigh had said. Tigh was right, she made a choice, and she couldn't look back and she couldn't stop. She had reached with her right hand and forced his head into the cabinets, causing blood to spout instantly from the head wound. Head wounds always bleed a whole bunch. They always had.

She remembered when her mother had done the same thing, but it was much different than what was happening right now. Memories of a small little girl with her head banged in the same spot against that one cabinet over and over for being bad floated to the surface before they were shoved back away. She would have been forced to pause and reflect on them but she couldn't stop now, she was in pure soldier mode, pure Starbuck. Nothing could stand in her way right now. Her left hand joined her right one at his neck on impulse and they hung on.

He twisted in her grip and it was hard to hang on to him, whether it was because of revulsion of what she was doing was sinking in or because he was twisting and fighting to free her grip, he still fought and a small part wanted to just let him go. Only pure iron will was getting her through the end to finish what she had started, commit to it. Finally he resigned himself to the fate, he looked at her sadly only to shut his eyes moments later, and than his body went still.

Kara, not the soldier and certainly not the legendary Starbuck, dropped the body to the floor, and her feet carried her to the bathroom, operating on auto-pilot, all thoughts of exploring without being watched forgotten. The door swung shut as hands that were her's and hands that weren't her's pushed it closed, pushed up the toilet lid and released whatever small amount of food was in her stomach back up in the form of vomit.

When her poor stomach was done she took a piece of toilet paper, some small part of her mind wondering about that and how it had been acquired, and wiped her mouth off. Inside her mouth she still tasted it, and so she spit, anything she could, anything to get the taste out. Moving back to the sink and rinsing her mouth out with water, not even noticing the two toothbrushes or the two tubes of tooth paste, her hands join under the stream of water, anything to get him off her hands.

She felt nausea roll up again and Kara went back to the toilet, with nothing in her stomach but still the repulsion of what she had done began to dry-heave, vomiting up nothing, as her stomach had nothing. After a minute of clutching the toilet lid, Kara didn't feel the strength to stand, and slowly she moves back from the toilet, and sinks to the floor her back on the opposite wall. Her knees come up and she wraps her arms around her shins, her head of blonde hair safely tucked into her secure little ball.

Kara had often hid like this when her mother was angry at her, drunk, or both. Ran off in the bathroom, curled up, she knew her mother could break open the door locked or not, Socrata had, more than once if she thought it worth the effort, to extract revenge on the small girl for whatever crime it was today. Sometimes she did, sometimes she just gave up on the door and was waiting when Kara left the confines of a linoleum floor.

The lock had always been replaced again and again, Socrata insisted on it, often making Kara do the work and the younger Thrace ended up being given many lashes for not working fast enough for her mother's liking or being unable to install it properly as Socrata had taken away the instructions.

Her voice floated around the present day Kara's head. "You're special Kara. You've got a destiny, and it's my job to make sure you aren't some stupid whimp and can face it. Not like all the stories in the scriptures of those pathetic heroes who weren't good enough, you've got to be the best." The words had been said again and again, in many different ways, in rare moments of triumph for the young Kara or in some of the darkest days.

Kara had grown to hate that word very early on, destiny, she never wanted to hear it again. She still read the Scriptures, despite the popular belief she couldn't be religious and wouldn't know one God from the next even if it was emblazed on her helmet right in front of her, and she still read the stories of the heroes, the good and bad ones, those who failed and succeeded in their missions for the Gods.

As a little girl, Kara had begin to memorize the books of scripture, the only thing she set her mind to really, while her school grades stayed good, nothing spectacular Bs mostly, with sometimes a C or an even rarer low A, her ability to recite the scriptures flourished. She remembered going to the Temple on a road nearby in her Picon town, and the Priestess, someone she had often considered her only friend growing up, helped her learn the verses and her knowledge of them grow.

It gave her something to live for, the knowledge of each of the words becoming safely tucked in her heart, mind and soul. To this day she can still recite most of them, time having worn down bits and pieces here and there, but still it was remarkable. It was her ability, albeit a well hidden one, everyone has a skill.

Ever since she started when she was nine years old, Kara had slowly gone through book after book after book, slowly, painstakingly memorizing the books. They gave her something; she started to think her days with the Priestess, the second, fourth, sixth and seventh days of the week were what all she had to look forward to.

Sitting on the floor of Leoben's bathroom, Kara gently rocked back and forth, and began to recite, the familiar words comforting her slightly, in the fact she still had them.

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica-<strong>

The blonde had been shaken after the explosion of a few days ago, still was as a matter of fact. For a while she stayed well inside the orbiting basestars, only now choosing to think about going down to the surface. Going down to him.

She hadn't been down to the surface since the treaty, or whatever you wanted to call it, had been made with the President. President Gais Baltar. It seemed so odd to think he had become the President and yet, she had come to expect surprises in things that regarded Gais.

Learning he had been alive from the model who called herself Boomer had been a shock in and of itself. Out of all the humans that had escaped, who would have thought he would be one of them, and becoming the Vice President and now the President either. She had no idea that what she had done; shielding him from the explosion had actually worked and saved his life. She had just used it as a last ditch attempt to keep the man she had fallen in love with, shouldn't have fallen in love with, alive.

As she waited for her Heavy raider to finish refueling she went to the data stream and stuck in her hand. Nothing new, nothing as important as exploding basestars anyways. An eight had mysteriously vanished yesterday had not shown up in the downloading stream. She had not reported to her job, had not been in her quarters and searches of all areas in the camp of known high profile, probable insurgent figures, had led to nothing.

No one had sign hide nor hair or her, she had simply vanished. It was worrying. The possibility she was being kept a prisoner somewhere, scared Caprica. Would she be a new Gina, would the humans slowly capture them all, not kill them but keep them in their current body, forced to exist in pain and suffering and not be freed or given mercy.

Where would she be kept? Any certain place? Tents would be stupid, and some had been looked through already, there had to be some other place, but no one was leaving camp according to the Centurion scouts and they were accurate in what they did 98% percent of the time. There had been the incident of the rogue eight and her pet human, Helo was his name or something. But how many things could really get snuck past a Centurion? Were the Centurions getting dumber, more outdated, was it time to revise their programming?

Or were the humans simply getting smarter? Was there an inside agent on the cylons' own side? So many questions, but none of them helped the Eight who had gone missing, she called herself Meghan, none of her reasoning or musings helped Meghan any. Caprica Six swirled the tips of her fingers in the liquid as she thought and batted ideas around.

Wait, something new in the data, it was a download. Leoben, killed so soon by the human called Starbuck no doubt. Caprica sighed, her brother had not downloaded in a good long time, she put her trip on hold and instructed the Raider to go without her she'd take another, and headed to the downloading chambers.

Her silver heels clacked against the floor of the basestar, form fitting red dress clung to her curves. She passed Centurions with a slight nod of her head, wondering if they even noticed she did it or if they didn't. She had never asked them about it. Her brother had always thought if they did not treat them with the respect they were due they might one day rebel against their humanoid counterparts. Ones told him to shut up and the Threes rode him mercilessly with jokes about it, but some of the Sixes thought he was right. They just didn't say anything.

Nodding to another of her model, who had decided her name was to be Ashley after much deliberation, they passed in the corridor, two pairs of heels clacking on the ground. Ashley had quickly claimed the spot of interrogator; privately Caprica thought she was just bitter a human had killed her in the Delphi museum. But Caprica said nothing. It was not her place, and if her line had a tendency to hold grudges and be more than a little bitchy well than.

Finally arriving at the door that held Leoben's tank she walks into the room and settles by the tub to wait. She reached to a drawer built within the device and pulls out towels and a bathrobe, along the wall various sets of clothes were hung up so he could pick out what to return in. Caprica was distracted for a moment, her mind going off on an entirely new wardrobe for him, what he insisted on wearing was so dull, and dreary and did not show him off to his best advantages. But he'd never let her do it, he had said no multiple times and she had eventually stopped asking. But what the color brown would do for him.

While she waited for the process to near completion she told a Centurion to go to the apartment, go through the iron door, shut it, enter the apartment and remove the body only. Nothing else and they were to leave the same way. Body only, nothing else was to be harmed or happen and the iron bar door and the regular door was to be firmly locked.

She stared at the still face of the man she called her brother and wondered if he was a fool for thinking Kara Thrace would ever love him. She wondered if she was any less of a fool when she had known going in that Gais only wanted her for sex and yet fallen in love with him anyways.

Seeing him, surrounded by important looking people and a woman who was surely a prostitute was hard. The blunt refusal he had to acknowledge her was harder and when he did it was to tell her she was a machine. Nothing she felt was real, he didn't love her and had never felt anything for her. The man had broken her heart into ity bity metaphorical pieces.

Caprica was brought from her brooding when the body in the tube slowly began to turn into Leoben, gasping, his eyes not seeing yet, but than regaining focus. He thrashed around and cried out for people. He cried out for her, his sister. He cried out for God, and he cried out for Kara.

Caprica had never understood why of all humans left in humanity he had picked the ace Viper pilot but she supposed that was love. You didn't choose to fall in love; you accepted it or tried to run away.

"Shh shh, it's okay." She said, her hand reaching out to caress his face, anything to calm him down. She had been killed by a Caprican resistance fighter once, she had been so disoriented, at least when she had been in the nuclear blast she had known she would die, with the bullet from the fight, in her mind it was still bullets raining around and she felt the battle around her until she became fully aware she had downloaded.

The body in the tank continued to thrash around and hands automatically reached up for his throat, holding his neck and he greedily sucked in breaths of air as if it would suddenly disappear. Glimmers of anger stirred through the blonde cylon woman. His woman, his obsession, had held his throat till he couldn't breathe.

Kara Thrace had killed her brother physically, Gais had killed her heart. Were the two really any different situations? Truth be told she worried about him sometimes, even though he'd been created before her he still felt like a little brother to her. Despite his protective nature and comforting her when Gais had made it clear the only way to be close to him was a path through his sheets, he really could be her younger brother. He behaved so strangely sometimes, going off on one of his sermons about God, the Universe, and the role you play. Twos were by intended nature supposed to be philosophers and great thinkers, but even Leoben could take it to an extreme. The fact he was representative of his line did not help.

His project with Starbuck was such an example, she'd never actually met the woman but she didn't need to. She had looked at Leoben's memories when he wasn't paying attention and her brother's growing obsession with her had filled the cylon woman with unease. Despite his claims she would one day grow to love him, and many of her brother's visions had come true, Caprica thought even that was a stretch.

_This may turn out to be the start of a very sad story_. She pondered while she gently reassured the body in the tank that was becoming her brother it was okay, _or the greatest love story that has ever been told. _

Caprica was a secret romantic, one of those girls who liked the idea of flowers, the dashing hero who swept the girl off her feet, a wedding ring and stories filled with happily ever afters with the princess and the knight riding off on a beautiful white horse. She only wanted the best for her brother, and she was not sure he would get it. Her brother had strokes of brilliance in him, and yet he was sometimes so, naive, there was really no other word, she wanted to shake him.

If it was true love like Leoben insisted than she could only hope it would turn out for the best. She had felt a broken heart and never wanted Leoben to feel it; she wanted to protect him from it. And yet, would she go as far as to take Kara away from him, she saw the way his eyes lit up when he talked about her, the protectiveness, the whole new tone he got when speaking of her.

One thing was for sure, she mused, Leoben was hopelessly in love with the human Kara Thrace.

After many more minutes of telling the body in the tub it was going to be alright Leoben woke up and she stroked his hair away from his face, softly speaking to him telling him it was okay just like a mother would. She'd thought her and Gais would have a baby once, and she than killed the thought. Why did her thoughts always have to end up on that man?

"Shhh, it's okay now, you're here with me Caprica, shhh, you're fine." she soothed and silently handed him a towel. Her brother looked worried and Caprica wondered what had really happened in that apartment. She knew his Kara had chocked him, but what else, she was curious after all.

Not even missing a beat he looked at her, blue eyes alight with worry "Jared, he is on the other Basestar working on Raiders right?" His tone is quick and urgent and Caprica is glad she can answer yes. She remembered what Jared had said that day, and thought she thought he was only saying it as a scare tactic Leoben had taken it very seriously.

Caprica turned as her brother stepped out and pulled his robe around his body, sitting down against the edge of the tank, the effects of downloading clearly having their effect on him. He looked a little sad too, worn out, Leoben sighed and closed his eyes, leaning his head against the tub.

She waits for him to speak, for once not wanting to be the first to speak about whatever else is on his mind now that Jared is accounted for. He opens his eyes a moment as if for the first time in as many minutes he realizes she is really there with him. "Thank you." he whispers softly, and she just nods.

The Six model wonders if he is going to talk about what happened, or even if he would want to. It must have been hard, seeing someone you loved and knowing they don't feel the same. She knew all about that. Leoben though, always for unpredictability, calmly states "I had a vision the other day."

When he first said it she listened to him, well before the attacks, other models had discussed boxing him. But than when he made a predication, and it turned out to be accurate, many of their views changed. He got a great deal right and was able to avoid catastrophes for the most part. It was uncanny, and yet, she was curious as to what possible outcome he had been shown by God now.

Taking her silence as a cue to continue he started talking again. "I saw a little girl Caprica, and she looked just like Kara. Her eyes were a blue-green though, it's a sign I've been waiting for" he sounded so hopeful and Caprica's blue eyes just look at him, not sure what to say to that.

Caprica personally sometimes questioned his sanity. That child could be Anders's, or that Adama fellow's. Or it could be Leoben's. Or for all she knew it could be some random guy off the streets, Leoben had no idea if it was his or not, lot's of people had blue eyes, but he looked so hopeful.

"Leoben, just because you saw it doesn't mean it is going to happen." She said, trying to be the voice of reason. If indeed the child would ever exist at all. She wanted it to, she knew it would make her brother happy and she did want him to be happy. She just wasn't sure if he could handle the disappointment if it turned out to not be his child at all "And you might not be the father either."

"I know," He broke in cutting her off. "But I have a good feeling about this. Okay?" And Caprica relented. Leoben had been right about a good many things, maybe he was right about this. Even though she had her doubts she was not going to press the issue, maybe it was a piece of hope he needed.

"I hope so." She answered quietly, and left the room for him to change and return back to his apartment, it becoming twilight in the city below. She didn't know why love worked the way it did, she didn't know whether Leoben's mythical child would ever come into existence or not. But she did know her apartment was ready and waiting for her, and she knew that night before she went to sleep she would pray to God for him.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

After everything and sitting on the floor for a few hours, she was tired, hungrier than before, and cold. Slipping out of the bathroom she looks back into the apartment with it's muted cool and calm colors, silent and empty. Someone had come in while she had been reciting to herself and taken away the body and cleaned up the blood.

There was still some water on the table from when she had thrown water at him and the food was still there along with his mostly empty glass. Her bright green eyes looked at the food, her stomach pleading with her mind to go over there and eat it, she decided it wouldn't make a difference if it was poisoned or not.

Kara didn't even bother to sit down; she took some of the cheddar and the cracker and forced herself to eat it slowly as to not bother her poor stomach which had not eaten in apparently three or so days. It seemed right; this building had just been a skeleton when she had seen it last so it had to more than a day or two.

After finishing her small meal she was still hungry, but didn't dare try any of the cabinets, not when she was so tired anyways. No, who knew what kind of funhouse he had created, it could have jars of blood and dog tails in jars for all she knew.

Kara had decided she wasn't going back to the bedroom to sleep, her recently drugged body having already been drowsy, tired again. It was his bed, and the thought of sleeping in his, it's, bed with him sent shudders down her spine. What did he want from her?

Did he want a baby? A hybrid like Hera? Kara silently prayed to the Gods that it wouldn't happen. He already said he didn't want revenge, was she some kind of experiment, some kind of toy, or Gods forbid some kind of slave?

Kara paced a bit, trying to think up what he could want from her. None of them sounded very appealing and the more she paced the more outlandish they become. She ran her fingers through her long hair, trying to decide what in the name of Apollo himself that Leoben, that the cylon, could want from her.

Her pacing led her to the window by the table and she slowly lifted the curtains. Stars had begun to twinkle throughout the night sky and the planet's moons shone down onto the surface. It seemed so tranquil; no one would ever know nor guess something horrible was going to be probably going down on the surface against the humans tomorrow.

Kara slowly raised a hand and her fingers brushed the cool glass, she noted it was bulletproof and shatterproof and she seemed to be on the third floor of whatever building this was. She had a lovely view of some more buildings, more apartments she presumed, those all one stories, or maybe it was a prison. Knowing the cylons they would probably call it the same thing. There was a courtyard in the middle with some kind of ridiculous flower patch. Just beyond was the edge of another building of some kind, she had no real idea what it was, having been sound asleep during its construction.

In the distance she heard an iron door clang open and than the sound of an iron door clanging shut. Just as she thought, she was really in a prison, only it included a cylon there 24/7, nice sheets and nailed-to-the-floor-tables. She never seemed to be able to have anything the traditional way now could she? She would almost prefer a jail cell, it would make her feel better ironically, she felt as though she were betraying the people in the camp, her people, by being here in this nice comfy apartment. Granted, she couldn't leave; she had a cylon there and would probably get in trouble for killing him but at least in a cell she would know what was going on.

She heard keys jingling out in the hall and than the lock turn. Her small frame tensed as the door opened and than shut behind him, locking the door and the dead bolt. Why the dead bolt too, she silently wondered, why not just the regular lock? She could unlock it easily as it unlocked and locked from the inside. Was he trying to keep people out?

As though the stupid mother-fracking cylon could read her mind, Leoben paused and than spoke, "I might just be paranoid, but I don't want to take the chance of anyone getting inside the apartment. Only I can unlock it from the outside, but at night, I still want it locked"

Kara didn't answer him; she just kept on staring out the window. She could see the Pyramid court in the distance, empty now, and her heart ached for Sam. She had promised she'd be back to see if he was feeling better when she came back from the basestar raid, she must be the worst wife ever. Get kidnapped when your husband is sick.

She wondered if he was okay, she wondered what he would think of her little cell. She wondered if he was getting better and if he had bullied whoever would have pitched in and helped take care of him into letting him play pyramid. If he needed meds from Cottle, or if he had started to be able to walk around again.

Leoben took her out of her silent brooding. "Are you hungry?" Before she could shake her head no even though she was, her stomach growled, the small amount of food she had fed it earlier nowhere near enough to satisfy its hunger. She silently cursed her body for being so weak and admitting to a weakness. He could withhold food from her or something.

He didn't press her anymore, he just walked into the kitchen and took down some plates. He opened the stainless steel refrigerator, the same metal color as everything else and not surprisingly shined until it gleamed, and some contents along with it. She just stood at the window, trying to watch him and appear to not be watching at the same time.

If the cylon noticed he didn't comment, he didn't say anything seeming to know she didn't want to talk and unwilling to press her. Why? The last time she had seen him onboard the Geminion Traveler he had taken an almost savage delight in pressing her buttons. And he knew exactly which buttons to push, like her and Lee back in the good old days. When they still had good days.

The memory is pushed down as he set the food on the side of the table that has been designated her side of the table. It's a sandwich, nothing fancy, just a ham, cheese, good stuff like lettuce, tomatoes, other vegetables she hadn't seen in over a year. Not since she got shore leave before the attacks and went back to Delphi had she seen this stuff.

Kara sat down in the chair, and again wondered what he wants. But the thought of food is overtaking, and she berates herself for being so pitifully weak. She's gone longer than this without food, she could do it again. But, her mind counters; she had been drugged for over two, almost three days, and who knew when she would get food again?

Across the table, less than five feet away and it's enough to make her fidget; the Toaster has not looked at his meal. Instead he has bowed his hand and his hands are clasped. _"Not sleeping, praying," _the memory reminds her, and she silently prays to the Gods in thanks for the food and for hope of escape. When he finishes he looks at her sadly "I'm sorry it's not a better meal, I wanted to make something fancier but this will have to do being it's late, I'll make it up to you tomorrow." And than it went quiet.

They took their meal in silence. Neither of them speaking t one another, Kara not wanting to voice her fears and the cylon content with the fact she'd probably talk to him eventually. She finishes her meal after him, and he picks up her plate and sets them in the sink for washing tomorrow. Apparently he only washes and puts away knives on the spot and any other kind of dangerous object, good to know.

The clock on the wall shows it to be 22:00 now, though it is an analog clock and it takes a second for her to convert to her preferred military time. While he crosses the room and goes into the room under the stairs, what used to be just a room for her had been converted into an office sort of space for him with the walls lined with books. Kara isn't thinking about books, instead she moves quickly intent on taking the time while he is distracted to enter the bedroom, not as fast as she could, but fast enough into the bedroom and picks her socks up off the floor. She doesn't trust him at all enough to change into something else to sleep in and this way her bare feet won't be cold. Last second she grabs her boots, not for warmth but for the knife inside. She'll be ready if he tries anything.

He seems resigned to the fact she won't sleep with him, and as she pulls her socks on over her cold feet, he looks like he is trying to find the right words to say from his spot outside the bedroom door. His voice starts out small and hesitant, "Do you want a blanket, or a pillow, or"

"No." She sharply cuts him off and he seems a bit sadder than and maybe she feels the tiniest bit bad. But he is a cylon, he doesn't have feelings, he has wires and programs. He nods a small nod and than turns around and goes to his bedroom, alone. After a few minutes the lights click out and Kara releases a breath she didn't know she'd been holding.

Taking the small break, she opened up her right boot's sole and to her relief the small knife is there. Finally after everything that she learned today, there's some good news. Kara settled down on the couch with it, and curls up into a small ball, her back against the couch's back and her eyes locked on the bedroom door. She doesn't trust him anymore than she believes that deep deep down the cylons are actually nice and caring people.

Try as she might, she couldn't stay awake. Eyelids kept fluttering over tired green eyes, her body was still feeling the effects of whatever had been in her system, and the promise of black oblivion was a pretty incentive promise. The knife still in her pocket, her hand resting on the handle, she eventually succumbed to the blackness.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9-**

**Leoben-**

As he flicked the light switch to the bedroom and plunged the room into darkness with the only light coming from a small light in the corner plug and moonlight streaming from a tiny gap in the navy blackout currents he reflected on his day. It was a habit, categorize everything, the good the bad the ugly, things accomplished and things left to do.

It wasn't all that he had thought it would be, the evening had not been planned to be in a downloading tank at all, but as always with Kara Thrace you had to expect the unexpected, that was not unusual with the woman. Her wild ways and habit of doing something totally unpredictable was one of the many things about her that drew him to her, a moth to flame, a lighthouse and the boats on the sea.

All in all though, it was not a perfectly horrible day, he had expected her resistance at first, he would have wondered what was wrong if she had not done it or attempted to. The fact she had struck so quickly after what had happened was what had unsettled him. Oversight on his part, he should have known better. It had been so good to see her again; every moment he spent with her was a precious gift from God. It was only a matter of time before she wanted to be held in his arms, he sensed it. It was a sixth sense of his, he just knew it would come to pass and that it would happen. Just like he knew that little girl was real, and that he was her father and Kara was undoubtedly her mother. And it was how he knew Kara Thrace would one day tell him she loved him. He knew.

As tired as he was, his body needed rest and the effects of downloading had extracted a heavy toll from the energy he could have, the only problem was he just couldn't sleep. His mind refused to quiet, thoughts kept him awake and plagued him without stopping for breath.. The pleasures of being an insomniac he thought sarcastically. Though he suspected his inability to get some shut-eye had something to do more with the woman in the room next door rather than his problem of not being able to fall asleep at a reasonable hour.

The small alarm clock on the dresser across the room declared the time to be one in the morning, the soft glow of the blue numbers. It was quiet, he had half expected Kara to try and kill him in the night. He nervously wondered how she was doing, she needed to rest and to take it easy Simon said. She would be tired out after the drug wore off but tomorrow morning she should be back to her old self.

Acting on a whim, he got out of bed and clad only in a pair of shorts to sleep in, he went to the closet and pulled down a pillow along with a soft blue pillow case to put it in. He went over to another part of the closet, and pulled down a warm fleece blanket in the same shade.

Leoben was very aware she could, and probably would, kill him for bothering her while sleeping, but he felt it was something he needed to do. Some of the other cylons had complained it got drafty in the living room and while he didn't know if it was true of his apartment or not, he didn't want her to become uncomfortable. A part of him of knew she was a soldier and she had slept in the colder temperatures outside for over a year or so, even so, he felt the need to make her comfortable. He didn't want her to be in pain or suffering ever again, Kara would have the best he could give her, she would never want for anything again.

With the things in his hands, he carefully stepped out the door as to not wake her if she was asleep. The main rooms were fairly dark; some of the kitchen appliances glowed ever so slightly but other than that he needed his memory to guide him to where she was sleeping on the couch in order to not trip over a table.

Leoben knew he could watch her forever, if he ever died permanently he wanted to come back as her guardian angel if God allowed him to do so. She was so beautiful; she was curled up into a ball, her knees bent and her arms tucked under her chin like some children would. Her blonde hair was splayed out and though she was fitfully sleeping, she looked so peaceful, granted she kept on shifting around and it was not a deep sleep, but it was sleep nevertheless. It was something he wanted to remember forever, she still had a certain fierceness to her, but she seemed calmer this way, it showed Kara for who she was, Starbuck slipped on over like body armor the second her eyes opened. It was rare for Kara to emerge.

He would have to be very careful or he would wake her and he knew she wouldn't like that very much at all. He certainly wouldn't and he should give her common curtsey, and the right to not be bothered while she was sleeping. That was off limits and a very big no. He would not do that to her, nor give her any reason to believe he did anything to her while she was asleep.

It was cool in here, goose bumps prickling up on his skin despite not being in here as long as she had. True she had on long pants, a jacket, shirt, socks, and much more than what he chose to sleep in but it was still cold in here. He unfolded the blanket and draped it over her, and made sure it covered her up completely, not wanting a chance for any of the cool air to get in and chill her. Next was the hard part. Gently he slid his hand under her head and slowly picked up her head; she shifted in her sleep but did not wake, for which he was thankful, she would not let herself to sleep for the rest of the night, and she needed sleep, the aftereffects of the drug still inside her system, while he gently placed the soft pillow under her head. Settling her back into her original position he felt much better, and maybe he would now be able to sleep.

He stood there for another minute or so, knowing he shouldn't just watch her sleep, but unable to tear himself away from her. His hand slowly went out and brushed a lock of blonde hair away from where it had fallen onto her pale face that no sun could darken.

"I love you Kara Thrace" he whispered into the night air "I really do." before turning his back on her and returning to his room. He still tossed and turned that night, but it was sleep, and when his alarm rang at seven in the morning he was rested better than no rest at all.

Sighing, he got up and moved around the bedroom, grabbing a pair of clothes to wear for the day and moving quietly to the bathroom as to shower. She had every right to be tired, and he didn't want to wake her up, come to think of it, was she even awake right now, just pretending to be asleep? He didn't look, despite the longing inside to look, as he slipped into the bathroom and quietly turned on the hot water.

When he was done and dressed for the day, he walked into the kitchen, debating what to make for breakfast. It was their first breakfast together, he wanted it to be worthwhile, and good. Cooking had not originally been in his line of memory but after practicing, trying and failing many times, he finally got to the point where he could make above average food. He wasn't a culinary mastermind, but he wasn't an idiot in the kitchen either.

Still trying to make as little noise as possible, he pulled out a frying pan and began to work on making bacon and eggs, simple but hopefully something she would end up liking. Only time would be able to help him in the arena of what she did like and what she would not like as he did not see her sitting down and debating food dishes with him anytime soon. He did hope she liked bacon though; personally, Leoben liked bacon very much.

Every so often while preparing the meal he would glance over at Kara where she was sleeping on the couch, Simon had warned him the drug would cause fatigue as an after effect but he had begun to worry about whether or not she was okay. Shouldn't she be up by now? Worry nagged at him without stopping, as many scenarios of what might and might not happen flew through his mind, each different idea becoming more impossible and outlandish with each one.

Deciding if she wasn't up by the time he was done making breakfast he would wake her up himself, there was supposed to be some fatigue, he could deal with it, he returned to scrambling the eggs, humming a melody under his breath. Yesterday had not been exactly what he had hoped for but it hadn't been all that bad and by ten this morning he was supposed to be down by the river helping the humans work on continuing their river canals, but he really hoped she would talk to him a bit this morning. He was not looking forward to instructing humans where to put things for the water purification systems. And making sure they didn't run off in the woods, or attack each other or himself. Than check through the prisons to make sure some cylons were not overstepping their authority. Leoben shook his head a bit, there would be no mention of work here, this was a good place with Kara and she did not need to listen to him complaining about how cylons bickered and argued like the humans most of them despised.

Out of the corner of his eye, Kara shifted in her sleep causing him to pause for a few moments. He would never be able to tell her how important she was to him, how much she meant to him, how much he loved her. Even if he did there were not words to convey just how much he valued her. Words couldn't capture it he thought, no word could come close to meaning what he felt.

As he stirred the eggs in the pan while periodically checking on the bacon in the pan next to it he sensed her waking up, the smell of food having made its way to her own senses. He knew it was not a wise move to constantly watch her, she had no reason to be on guard and he did not plan to give her a reason to be guarded in any way shape or form and if he watched her what felt like a great deal she would only increase her hostility.

Because killing you wasn't hostile enough a voice mocks in his head that sounds scarily like his brother Jared, that little voice that brought doubt and fear had always sounded like him in Leoben's head. It was cold, menacing and kind of laughing at him at the same time. Fears Kara wouldn't ever care about him had been preyed on by the other cylon many many times and yet, Leoben couldn't get him boxed.

God worked in strange ways, he could only presume he had some purpose for keeping Jared around.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Kara felt much better this morning, her initial fatigue having worn off for the most part, and this time when she woke up she remembered everything that had happened. Her hands checked her pocket carefully just in case she was being watched and she breathed an inward sigh of relief that the blade of sharpened metal is still there in her pocket, just waiting for a use.

She noticed she had a pillow and blanket, something she had gone to sleep finally falling into darkness without. Leoben must have come in the middle of the night and given them to her, even though she said she didn't want any. Flashes of resentment coursed through her, he kidnapped her and than was being nice to her? What the frack?

Now the question to be added to the long list of questions she still had was who was he to do that? Why did he feel the urge to do that, or better yet who was he to do that? It was a nice gesture sure, but she could take care of herself, she had for years and she was not going to stop suddenly because she got thrown in some apartment she had to share with a cylon who would prattle on and on about streams, his one God, quote scriptures he shouldn't and say things he should not know. If he wanted to be nice, the only thing she could think of that would be nice right now was him letting her out, and the cylons packing up and leaving.

She fully took in her bearings around her, her back ached a little bit due to the couch being very firm and not comfortable to sleep on, she would need to stretch her muscles in her back. The clock on the wall said 7:40, sun was streaming into the curtains by the glass table and it felt peaceful.

It was the idea of domestic tranquility which is exactly why it was wrong. Everything in her was too neat, too color coded and matching. It was a far cry from the apartment she had, second hand furniture, paint on the walls everywhere, everything being battery operated due to the power companies keep on turning her power off.

Starbuck took in a deep breath and came back with the smell of bacon. It had been so long she had smelled bacon, let alone tasted it, and yet, there it was wafting through the air. She remembered when her and Zak had staid up one Friday night and played a game with how many odd things they would eat with bacon, Zak had loved bacon. She had never eaten it after all the funeral. It was one of those little things that reminded her of him in a daily basis, the first thing after getting back from the funeral was throwing it all out.

Green eyes found the cylon in the kitchen making the said bacon. He wasn't paying her any mind, just working away on breakfast. She wondered if he would hold food away from her, or what he would do if she didn't eat it.

It turned around and smiled a small smile when it saw she was sitting up and awake. After that he reached into a cupboard and pulled out some glasses, pouring, Gods was it orange juice, into the glasses. She briefly wondered where Leoben had gotten all this food, or maybe her mind really was playing with her head. Either way, how, after the worlds' end did one, long after it had happened, get things like bacon, orange juice, ham sandwiches, lettuce, bread and tomato? Did the cylons have some kind of ship that had all this stuff on it? If so why hadn't the colonials found said ship and taken all this stuff sooner?

Leoben placed the food on the table and she just watched it all with detached curiosity. He sat down when it was all finished and paused, his ice blue eyes studied her and she refused to flinch in his gaze. She would not show anymore weakness; yesterday throwing up had been it. No more episodes where the act of killing bothered her so much, it had been so much easier in a viper when her enemies didn't have faces, but when something in your hands stopped breathing, even if for a moment as it would come back later, it really crashed into her, she had never killed with her own bare hands before, it had frightened her, the horrors her hands had become, even if the fracker deserved it.

"You need to eat Kara." he said pleasantly, liked yesterday had never even happened. He acted as though nothing fazed him in the slightest, not even death or getting his head shoved in a water bucket. It was just another reminder of how inhuman they are Kara she reminded herself. The fact she had ever felt pity for him, it, even prayed for his soul to the Gods, was now forgotten by the fact she was sitting in his apartment with no way out.

Glaring she rose to her feet and slowly made her way to the table and before sitting down flat out asked him. "Why am I here? And no bullshit, the real answer." she kept her triad face on, her practiced mask in place to hide her own thoughts, her bluffs and frustrations while her eyes looked for any bluffs in his own face. She remained standing, it gave her some measure of control, even if that control was just a lie.

He stopped, his hand holding the glass of juice halfway to his mouth while he slowly put it down, her own plate of food, scrambled eggs and bacon, left untouched. She wouldn't let herself eat not until he gave her a Godsdamn straight answer. Or maybe she'd never eat, you just never knew. Maybe she would go on a hunger strike of her own, kill herself of starvation he couldn't stop her, but the question kept nagging her in the back of her mind what did he want, she couldn't fight a faceless enemy. She needed intel, and she needed it to form any kind of attack. Why was he being nice to her, why was she brought her instead of some other cell, it made no sense.

He sat considering his next move, whether to tell her flat out or leave her to come to the conclusion in her own time. After a few moments he looked like he was about to say something but than changed his mind only to re-open his mouth a full ten seconds later. His words had the feel of those spoken with care, carefully chosen with longer than normal pauses at the end of sentences.

"I knew the second I met you, you were special. Special to me and than there was your destiny. Your destiny and mine lay intertwined, the streams converge, and it is our destiny to be together, it is the way God wants it and even if he had not shown me what was to come, I fell in love with you anyway, and one day you'll love me too." He stops and takes a sip or orange juice while Kara herself is found for one of the few times in her life having nothing to say. What did one say to that, you're insane, you're crazy, I have a husband and I love him not you.

"No." She whispers softly, Kara shook her head her blonde hair flipping back and forth, her knuckles white against the chair that she was gripping. "No, it's never going to happen no," her mother had always told her no man would ever want her, she was only good for sex or flings, nothing like the stuff you read in romance novels. So how was she supposed to deal with a completely different kind of attack than the kind she had planned on? How did she make him let her go? Something made her think the whole 'if you love something let it go' was not going to work here. He had gone to all this trouble, kidnapping her, putting her in this apartment, making her breakfast, because he had some strange obsession with her? He said he _loved_ her.

"Of course it's going to happen!" he said again with a force behind his tone, he had apparently argued this before, and the fact did not surprise her. Leoben mixes lies with truth, she had to find out what was real and what wasn't. "You're going to hold me in your arms, you're going to embrace me, you're going to tell me that you love me. I've seen it." He paused and his blue eyes found her own widened green ones, shock had managed to break through parts of her triad face and she turned away before she answered him. "You're lying, it's never going to happen."

Before he could say anything else she scampered up the stairs and opened the apartment door, easily opening the locks and moving out into the hall only to be faced with the only set of bars she was likely to see during her entire imprisonment. He loved her, she hadn't been able to see a bluff in the lines of his face and he seemed so serious, so convinced. He was insane, there was no other explanation for it, and she had nearly tortured him to death and would have finished the job had the current President of the time not intervened. Her hands had wrapped around his neck the day before and taken away his ability to breath, and yet, he loved her. No, he couldn't love her, Sam loved her, Lee had once loved her, Zak had loved her, the Admiral cared for her like family, her ship-mates all cared about her enough to miss her should she ever die, but not Leoben, she didn't return whatever emotion he thought he felt, and the part that scared her the most was he seemed willing to wait, willing to hold her there, for months, years the rest of her life, until she loved him too.

Kara searched the bars in vain for any kind of weakness, not that she expected one in the first place but just in case. Nothing, the bars were solid, and again they were shiny, her hands leaving fingerprints where she searched for any weakness in the bars. She threw herself at the bars in vain and pulled at them, yelling to be let out. Her cries fell on deaf ears as the hallway was free of people, her shoulder felt like it was on fire and she knew there was to be some lovely bruising there.

Hopelessly sinking down to the concrete floor her hands still clenched around the bars she began quietly "Lords of Kobol hear my prayer."


	10. Chapter 10

Well, my first double digit chapter. Thank you all for reading and for those of you who have submitted a comment of some kind. If you have anything to say I would be happy to hear from you. And I do apologize for the lateness of this chapter, I had issues with my computer and ended up losing half of Chapter 10, and so I had to put it in with Chapter 11, which was at the time an incomplete chapter. I should be back on schedule for the new chapter 11 being I update Monday or Tuesday. Anyways, I hope you enjoy.

**Chapter 10-**

**Laura-**

She sat in Sam and Kara's tent, the man finally getting some sleep due to pure exhaustion and his illness. He was getting much better but still needed to take it easy. Which Sam had refused on doing, he was doing anything he could, surveillance gleaned from inside the dentition center in hopes of finding her, praying she wasn't on the basestar. It was sad to watch.

He slept fitfully, but Laura couldn't really blame him. Her own dreams wondered the question of what they were doing to the woman and no doubt so many other people. The Colonel just to name one, she really wanted the Colonel back, if only partly because his wife was driving everyone nuts.

She watched a nightmare envelope the man but didn't move to go over to him. She had learned from stories the people would tell in the bunkrooms you did not interrupt a soldier in a nightmare and Sam counted as a soldier. Anyone on the insurgency was a soldier now she thought grimly, even herself.

Laura glanced at the bucket of water that Cally had fetched for him, The former deck hand had been sent down to the river to work on the canals, he had been taken a day after Kara, while Sam was to report there tomorrow, forcing the people to work, and yet the toasters had said they weren't going to be imposing on the people. Right, she thought bitterly, and people had thought electing Baltar was a good idea. She should have never confessed to rigging the election, she would have never let them settle here.

Laura sighed, what she would have done and what she should have done or could have done were all pointless now. It had happened, and there was nothing she could do about it. Her regrets changed nothing, except that she had them and had to continue to bear them.

It was hard, seeing a person one day than learning the cylon had picked them up the very next day. Or a matter of hours after you had seen them, or even hearing them being dragged away within ear-shot of when you had last seen them or the event happening before your eyes, which had happened a great deal.

She had started to keep a journal, hidden safely from where anyone could find it. She needed something of the like to keep herself on track, and provide proof to future generations a log of what her people had gone through. This would all become a distant memory to future generations; the teacher in her was keeping a log to teach future generations.

Sam sat up with a start and coughed instantly; Laura got up and gave him some water which the man drank. She didn't even have to tell him to, it was like someone had taken Samuel T. Anders who she had known and replaced him with a flat copy. He barely talked anymore, wouldn't joke, would barely meet anyone's eyes. The former President knew he was thinking he should have been with her, kept her safe but Laura privately thought there was nothing he could have done.

Leoben would have gone after her anyways, of that she was certain. What for was a good question but she had seen the security videos and told them to be destroyed afterwards, telling Bill they had lapsed on getting video. Truth was they were disturbing to say the least, the cylon seemed to know a great deal about the pilot.

Since Laura found it unlikely the Cylon God had told him, the only thing that stood to reason was that the cylon had been watching her. Watching her before the Worlds ended, apparently before she had gone into the military, before she had even left home. One day she had confronted the woman and Kara hadn't denied anything which left Laura with a sick feeling in her stomach.

They really had been watching her. Very closely, as she presumed the blonde's mother had gotten away with the level of abuse for all those years and never been called out on it from what she had gleaned of Kara's past. Leoben had thought she was special, going on about destiny and whatnot. Laura to be honest did not want to contemplate what that meant. Or to be more accurate what Leoben and the rest of the cylons thought it meant.

"Samuel are you alright?" She asked desperate to remain calm and not to tell the man of her growing suspicions that Leoben's choice of taking Kara was anything but random. He clearly blamed himself for her kidnapping and Laura could not bring herself to add on to that by telling him what might be nothing but her imagination gone wild. She would if there was proof, but right now, he didn't need that.

But it made sense, the way Leoben had watched her, the look she had seen him give the woman as the hatch had closed, the cheeky wave at Sam, Kara had been taken on purpose, but that led them nowhere.

"Fine." He said after a few beats of silence, not commenting on anything else. He wasn't fine, but than again none of them were. Dealing with so many loses; they were all taking it personally. Chief had even been picked up and interrogated; Jean Barolay had been picked up, the Colonel, Starbuck.

In all over two thousand had disappeared since the cylons arrive not more than five days ago. It made Laura feel ill, and even more so when she knew that each warrant was signed personally by the fracking President Gaius fracking Baltar. Rage overtook the woman, her hate of his antics blocking out every rational thought in her mind for a few moments.

"You okay?" Sam asked, noticing her hands clench of their own accord and her glare off into the distance. Laura felt guilt wash over her, he needed to be taken care of, he needed every bit of rest he could get, she was still over-worrying according to Cottle but not wanting to strain the man. His eyes looked at her concerned and she shook her head.

"I'll be fine." she said quietly. It was a lie, they both knew it, neither of them would be fine ever again. No one ever would be fine again, their experiences were too horrible for anyone to shrug it off. Already there were reports of cylons attacking humans, things that would normally be life changing events on their own were becoming the norm and it was only the first couple days.

It seemed mainly the Dorals and a certain Two with a scar on his eye, the one that had been with the Leoben that had stolen Kara, that went out and attacked the people, beating them savagely, taking advantage of them, generally just destroying them, creating a reign of fear.

And than the sorry excuse of President had the gall to arrest Chief for trying to help someone who had fallen into the canals instead of keeping on working and letting the poor kid drown? What about the poor young woman she had helped the other day, helping Cottle patch up her wounds, a victim of such savage attacks? But no, her attackers were alright because they were with his administration and were cylons.

A knock on one of the tent posts distracted her, and Sam's head snapped up from where he had laid down. Laura's heart ached, she could see the hope in his eyes, she felt it tug on her heart every time someone came up to speak with her. Please let it be good news Laura prayed, Please.

"Come in." Sam called, and in popped in a familiar face. Chief, he looked banged up, bruises appearing more than normal skin, some marks that looked like a whip had hit him, two black eyes, and tired beyond belief. Laura's heart leaped, happy to know they had let him out. Galen looked over at Sam and walked over to the place he was resting.

Laura gave him in her chair, or what passed for a chair and he sunk into it gratefully. "Thank you." He said to her before turning back to Sam. "I heard things in prison. Things about Kara."

"What is it?" Sam demanded, the man having his full attention and Laura knew they would have to be careful. When looking for Kara he wouldn't be rational, and the Caprican resistance leader had to be rational for anything to work.

"Don't say anything, just let me finish okay?" Galen started, a bit uneasy which put Laura on her guard, and Sam nodded, eager for some news, any news. They hadn't heard anything and Laura knew he was growing desperate.

"I got taken by the two who calls himself Jared, the one with the scar right here," Galen drew the scar of the same cylon who attacked people with a ruthless frenzy. Laura nodded, not sure where this was going. "Frackers evil, he and a six named Ashley seem to be in charge of tortures. Trust me, there's screaming in there all hours. But that's not what I heard.

"The other two who calls himself Leoben, the one on the Geminion Traveler or something, the one who took Kara, they got in a row. Him and Jared.

"Jared had been saying stuff, baiting Leoben. He was talking about Kara, and whatever he would do if he ever got his hands on Kara. Leoben got upset, defensive and after a while it went to blows, in front of a whole bunch of prisoners. Blonde cylon broke it up, telling them to go their own separate ways. They looked like they might have tried to kill each other."

Sam was silent and Laura found her breath bated. What did it all mean, she rubbed her temples, and started to pace in the tent across the dirt floor. Sam looked like he wanted to jump out of bed and go find her right now. And Chief stopped at another memory.

"They killed Jackpot. And Greyson." The deck chief said so quiet they almost missed him saying the words. A pilot and one of his knuckle draggers. Both good men and Sam looked sad, both had played pyramid with him at some point or another. Laura felt as though someone had knocked her over and her anger at Gais Baltar returned. Peaceful co-existence, yeah right. People were dying, tortured to death, murdered, for what? No charge, none at all. And yet he sat on his fat ass in Colonial one, and did nothing, he probably slept with the cylons, ate dinner with them, been real buddy buddy. It explained why he wasn't dead yet, Laura knew full well if it had been her the cylons world have killed her on the spot.

"Back to Kara." Laura said after a lengthy silence, her mind having mulled it over for a while and needing the distraction so she did not go do something rash. This gave some credence to her suspicions and the nagging part of her mind that still felt guilt whenever Helo and Sharon were mentioned; told her Sam needed to know, "I don't think she is in the traditional prison. A while back, before Captain Thrace went to Caprica she was to interrogate Leoben, he kept saying something about a destiny to her, which is another reason they might keep her separate, but the blows confirms it." She said and the two men traded glances.

"What are you saying here?" Tyrol asked her while his question was echoed in Samuel's face. Laura wasn't sure what she was saying either, but it was making sense, the cheeky wave, the expression on Leoben's face when he found out who Kara really was.

Laura believed the cylon, the machine, was obsessed with Captain Kara Thrace. "I am saying she is something they seem to care about, the cylons seem to have been watching her for a long time." Laura admits, knowing they have a right and need to know in how she was right. Sam's large hands grip the blanket his tanned skin sheet white, "And if someone were to say something about hurting Kara, what would you do Samuel?"

"Make them pay." He answered without hesitation and it finally sinks in just why the cylons might want her. "Oh Gods." He mummers under his breath, "Oh Gods, Oh Gods Oh Gods Oh Gods." Chief looks sorry he brought it up in the first place, even though he shouldn't because if anyone should be sorry, it should be the cylons. One number two model named Leoben in particular.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

Kara had not talked to him for days. He knew she would at some point, unable to fight in the traditional role, himself more careful after the first night, he hated dying. The not talking wouldn't be so bad if she was eating. But she refused to touch anything he set in front of her, and it had kept up for several days.

Even if he thought she was just nervous about eating by him and letting her eat alone she wouldn't touch it. She would sometimes drink some water but would stubbornly refuse to touch her food. He saw her expression when the food was infront of her, she was hungry but she wouldn't eat the food. Leoben didn't know what to do, he had thought she might do something like this but had no real ability to combat it.

He could force feed her and he might have to if she didn't eat dinner tonight, but that would be counter productive. It would end up being a very traumatic experience for her as she would fight them and need to be subdued. And he didn't want her near Simon anyways, not after what he had nearly done on Caprica. The idea she would be used for that was abhorrent to him.

Leoben sent up a small prayer to God in hopes she would eat today. If not he may have to get a Centurion to help him so she would cooperate and feed her. It might not be pretty but she had to eat, without food she would waste away to skin and bones and that would be bad for her, not only because it wasn't healthy but because she had always been physically active and you couldn't much do that when you were too weak.

Not that it stopped her, he noted, walking in the door. She had not yet noticed him and was on her hands in a push-up position. He could see how much she was struggling to get back up to the original position and not just collapse on the floor. His heart pained, it killed him to see her like this, fighting when she didn't need to and hurting herself in the process.

There had been no more attempts on his life but he knew she was waiting for the right moment. He had tried to be on his guard as much as possible and thought he knew what she was doing. Lull him into a false sense of security and than strike out. He hoped to avoid that, and get her to eat.

She slowly gave up on doing anymore push-ups, a fine sheen of sweat on her skin. He shut the door behind him causing her to pull herself to a seated position. He locked the door behind him and went down the stairs and went directly to the kitchen. Today had been a long hard day and Jared had insisted on baiting him again.

Leoben did not know what Jared's problem was; he seemed to have an obsession with Kara to rival his love for her. But instead of love, what Jared seemed to feel was hate, the Two had said it enough times himself. But the comments bothered him.

_He was in the dentition center, needing to run something through her and get some men released to work on the water project. He felt sadness that something he built, this building was being used for such abhorrent purposes. Someone's screams echoed off the walls in the distance sending shudders down his spine._

_Jared of course had used every favor, threat and charismatic ability in the book to get a spot of torturer. As if he attacks against the free human population weren't enough, he seemed to take an insane pleasure in what he did. It sickened Leoben that one of his own could be brought to such but he was out-voted, he always was on really important matters like this. _

"_So Leoben." He called from down the row of cells, stupid leather jacket and stupid sunglasses on his face, grin to match. Leoben knew Jared should be boxed but there was no way of doing it short of doing it without Cavil's vote. And if he did it without the vote when everyone else found out law said you were boxed yourself and Jared would be let go. He'd never be with Kara again, and Jared could. _

_His train of thought had been broken by Jared "How is your pretty blonde viper pilot" Leoben's hands had clenched into fists. He wasn't allowed to talk about her. "Found out if she's a good ride yet? Does she scream when provoked?" The cylon just didn't know when to stop._

_Leoben crossed down the rows of cells, the fact there were people in them lost on him. No one was allowed to talk about Kara that way. Less than ten feet away Jared opened his mouth again._

"_Now if I were in charge of her, we would already know the answer to that." which pushed the final button for Leoben. Crossing the distance he punched the brother cylon in the head. Jared was ready, getting a shot to his stomach in. But Leoben was angry and refused to lose, the battle was an even match until a Six interrupted. _

"_Jared back to work. Leoben behave yourself." She snapped authortively and the twos stalked off in their own direction. Jared was a danger to Kara, Leoben knew it but everyone assumed he was over reacting. Leoben could feel it in his very soul. _

_Both had bruises on there bodies and both were annoyed and both knew it wasn't over. Jared may play it as just being annoying but Leoben knew better. Jared was planning something and Leoben knew it wouldn't be last_.

Opening drawers to get a pot for a stew he had decided to try, Leoben kept an eye on Kara while at the same time beginning to cut up vegetables and the meat had been cooked yesterday, all it needed was to be heated up. Nice and simple, today had been a long and taxing day. Humans had also nearly thrown him in the river, there was that Jared fiasco and now Kara would probably not eat today.

Loading the cutting boards contents into the pot on the stove Leoben set to washing the dishes he had used to make the food. Kara would wash dishes; he supposed boredom had driven her to do it as he had certainly never asked her.

He put the knife back into its drawer and looked over at Kara who just sat on the floor. The smell of the food had to be getting to her, as Leoben hoped it would. Not in a malicious way, he just hoped it would convince her to eat.

"Kara." He called her softly, but got no response. It was only on the third time did he say her name that she actually looked up over at him. "Eat today, please. You need food and if you don't eat yourself we'll have to force-feed you and to be honest with you I'd rather not do that."

Her eyes narrow looking for a bluff but she can't find one. There isn't one to find. He is being completely honest with her as he never thought lying was a good thing to do to each other in relationships. Sure when you might get sent out an airlock and lie to buy time it was worth it, but not to someone he cared about. He did not want to fracture any kind of trust they would have one day.

He leans his neck to one side trying to ease the stiffened muscles. He had been on his feet all day, and was growing tired. Who knew getting all this stuff finished as fast as possible was so tiring?

Kara is still sitting on the floor throughout the entire process, trying to decide whether to eat or not? Leoben can't tell, her face is mask, a mystery to him. He stops after a few beats, not wanting to make her uncomfortable. Leoben goes to the cabinets and pulls down some bowls and plates along with an apple he begins to slice.

By this time the food is almost ready and Kara pulls herself unsteadily to her feet. She worked herself too hard Leoben realizes instantly. If she decides not to eat she could really hurt herself. She never knew when to quit, admiration for her determinedness springs up inside but if she would kill herself through it, it would devastate him.

He pours her a glass of water, and picks up a soup ladle to pour the soup into the bowls. He notices slightly pleased she is sitting at the table, her compliance worrying him slightly but he hopes he has simply gotten through to her that she needs to eat.

Leoben puts the bowl in front of her and Kara bit her lip. She's hungry, she's killing herself by not eating and insisting on taxing her body to its limits and she knows it. Leoben sent a small prayer to God that she would eat, He didn't know what kind of trauma force feedings would bring.

As he always had Leoben bowed his head and prayed to God. He gave thanks for the food in front of them, the home they had and silently he added in thanks for Kara. Leoben spooned some of the stew and the feel of it is a good one. It's warm, tastes good and he is reasonably pleased with his creation.

Of course none of it mattered if Kara wouldn't eat it. She had to eat Leoben thought desperately, she was only hurting herself and he never wanted her to be hurt. She was by an extension hurting him too, it was hard to see her this way, the lean starved look she had on her features and the quietness, it was a far cry from the woman who had informed him he had no soul.

Her hands were twisting in her lap, her fingers playing with the silver band on her thumb. She was looking down at the bowl of soup before her and the sliced apple pieces he had placed on her plate next to the bowl. Leoben waited the tension seeming like it was going to suffocate him.

"Kara." He says her name softly, and realizes fully just how unused she is to anyone saying her name gently. It is something he has to remember, she has hidden behind Starbuck for so long it was hidden away, and said with affection, he can usually get her to looks at him before she turns away. This time is no different. "I don't want to force feed you and you won't like it."

She glares at him but her hands have moved from her lap and one is curled around the edge of the spoon. Go on Kara, he silently urged her, pick it up. She lifts the utensil and dips it into the bowl, scoops out the food and eats it. Slowly as her training has dictated, but he knows she wants to eat it all. When he had been on the colonial ship he had wanted to eat it all right than and there, shoving it in his mouth without any caution about what it might do to his stomach.

He glances away, not wanting to bother her. He returns to his own bowl of stew and stands to get more. And than does the polite thing, himself having always been a fan of manners. She is almost done with eating and reaches a hand out slowly "I'll get you some more okay?"

Before waiting for her response he picked up the bowl and walked to the kitchen with the almost completely silent of padded footsteps behind him. He silently tenses up but pretends not to notice, he is on guard this time, downloading is not fun. He sets the bowls on the counter-top and reaches for the soup ladle, before he chooses to turn around and grab the hands that had been going for his throat.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

She supposed she isn't surprised as his hands encircle her wrists, stopping her from attacking him. After all twice would be far too easy for her right? Because everything in her life had to be hard, difficult and as fracking painful for her as possible right? She never could just catch a break, find some key on him and get out of this place? No of course not, why should she leave when she could stay and play dollhouse with a cylon for frack's sake.

She hoped if she showed she wasn't interested he would back off. If anything it made him more determined, chattering at her endlessly while she remained silent. Starbuck silent was not something that had ever happened and after years of being ignored by all around her she was tired of being ignored. So she become someone you looked at when you entered a room, and her ability to be ignored disappeared. Now she wanted to have it back desperately if only to shut him up.

"Kara." It stated calmly, moving forward a bit. She tried to pull her hands away, to fight him back. Fight 'till she can't. But his grip is like a vice, and Kara knows if he doesn't want to let go it will be very hard to get him off. She wonders what else he could do to her without her consent and her mind took a very ugly turn.

It was drilled into every female cadet the very lovely fact that they could be tortured in a certain kind of way that was not very pleasant. It had happened to males before but it was a rare occasion, the majority of rape happening to the women. He said he had no desire to harm her, but what that meant to her might mean something very different to him.

"Kara why don't you go sit back down and eat, you're hungry, I know you are. You have to be. So please just calm down and let me get you more to eat." His voice is calm and soothing. She hates herself but it sets her body at ease, something she was unable to control. He seems to know it, and uses the tone as often as possible. She glares at him, this is the first time he's touched her since he pinned her to the wall on the transport ship so long ago. That she is aware of anyway, the thought sending another shudder down her spine.

He lets go cautiously, and never takes his eyes off her while he pours her more to eat. As a game she started to play after her second day in here she devises a way to kill him with it. It is more than a game, but some of it is just plain imagination, and helps keep her mind in the clear and from slipping straight into despair. She needs a hope and if hope comes from devising ways to kill a humanoid cylon with a ladle well than.

She snatched the bowl and made her way as fast as she could to the table. Away from him, no it. The words got confused in her head, It him, was there really any difference. She mentally slapped herself, of course there is Kara, he is just a machine, he doesn't have a soul. But he acted like he did, so maybe. No, stop that train of thought right there soldier she ordered herself.

The stew was still hot against her throat but she didn't care, as each spoonful made its way down leaving a slightly burning sensation. It made her feel alive, as she couldn't do much but exist the last couple days.

She can sense him watching, and she hates it. Hates the way whenever she enters his gaze gravitates to her before he stops as to not make her too terribly uncomfortable. He says he wants her to love him, but he doesn't know it's never going to happen. She loves Sam. She loves Lee. She loved Zak. She loves the Admiral as her father. She loves Helo as her brother. She loves Cally and Chief as friends. But she doesn't love the cylon sitting across from her.

_Look at you Kara going soft_. Her mother's voice overwhelms all other thoughts with her snide remarks. _You know anyone you love ends up destroyed. _

The meal is finished all too quickly and she stares at the sink in front of her full of bubbles. Kara looks around the apartment to find Leoben sitting in a chair scribbling something in a notepad while he refers to the pad than the book. Gods help her it's a psychology book. How to screw with Kara Thrace's head 101.

After a few moments he looks up and notices what she's doing. She hasn't done many dishes before now, but she needs to do something besides curl-ups, crunches, planks, push-ups and the like. Mundane house chores may not be fun but it is a welcome distraction.

"You know you don't have to do dishes if you don't want to." He says, his blue eyes locking in with her own green ones before she yanks her gaze from his and returns to the sink full of lemon scented bubbles. Zak always bought orange scented she remembers, whenever they went shopping he wouldn't let her buy any other kind than orange.

For the first time in days she speaks, her voice sounds strange to her, as if it is someone else's, her self not used to hearing it after a week of disuse. "Not like there is anything else to do around here." and he looks sad she notes before she truly brings her eyes down to the sink and returns to scrubbing the pot.

"You'll understand one day Kara." He says simply and she just snorts. She doesn't look up again and he doesn't push her to talk anymore. He just goes back to his book and notepad after a minute or so and she wishes she was anywhere else. She won't understand one day, she does have nothing to do but simple forms of exercise, devising of ways to kill him and house chores and pray.

Kara slowly began to pick up where she left off from her memorizations of scripture, the words whispered under her breath giving her some comfort as she scrubbed at a stubborn vegetable sticking to the side of the pan. Prayer and religion had gotten her through her childhood, they could get her through this.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11-**

**Leoben- **

She spoke to him. At first he wondered if it was his mind playing tricks on him but there is no mistaking her voice, the tone, and the music of its sound. He wants to never stop hearing it, talk with her till the day they die. He can never get enough of Kara Thrace; no matter what part of Kara Thrace that is, he stopped trying.

He goes back to his book and scribbles down another note on the pad of paper. The book is usually used for study because Leoben found the volume fascinating, and because he wanted to use its knowledge to better understand how Kara Thrace really worked. The best knowledge could come from books; unlike most of his siblings, Leoben understood that, spending a large amount of time at libraries and book stores. Before the cylons left the colonies of course. After that he had whatever he had brought with him, a large collection of odds and ends. Poetry (he was a big Katariss fan) Psychology, Medicine, aerospace avionics, viper tech manuals, cookbooks, all kinds of books that could be useful, and the classics too.

He heard Kara speaking again and looked up at the figure who was steadily scrubbing a pot. The more he listened, the more he realized she was not talking, she was reciting. Colonial scripture, or at least that was what he thought it was. Leoben was very familiar with colonial scripture, but he didn't know some of the finer details. He just knew the main gist of it, not wanting to delve into the human religion very much, just the surface of it.

It was another goal of Leoben's to get her to know God. Bring her on her journey to knowing him and knowing his will than proceeding to go accomplish it. God brought him to her, and God had shown him that they would be together.

"Kara why do you believe so strongly in your Gods?" Leoben asked, some part of his mind from the thought of religion going into what Caprica had dubbed 'full sermon mode'. Kara predictably ignored him, continuing on with her words. "It makes me curious," he admitted "how you could have so much faith in them."

He honestly wanted to know what made her keep her faith, and it was part of another goal. He wanted to help her realize her false idols had done nothing for her, and that by coming to know God she would find the truth of her life. Of course he would use his love for her to help her do that, although converting her wasn't the only reason he had brought her here, away from her people. He loved her deeply with his entire body, mind, and soul and never wanted to be away from her. But part of the reason God brought him to her was to help bring her to know him.

"Did you ever wonder if they really existed? Because if they had, why would they let someone as devoted to them as you suffer for so long?" There was no response from her, she just kept scrubbing the dishes and saying scripture to herself, ignoring him and his sermons. Just like she had sat on the couch and ignored him the night before or done curl-ups by the window the day before last.

"It's because they aren't real Kara. There is only one true God," He hoped this would get him some kind of reaction, maybe she would speak again? But she was still ignoring him, saying the scriptures of her false Gods to herself, not looking up from the soapy water.

He sighed to himself and went back to his book; he would speak when she didn't have something to distract herself with. That was the reason she wasn't listening to him, her mind was simply on other things and preoccupied. Oh Leoben knew that was an excuse for himself, he simply didn't want to face the fact that this was harder than he had thought and he needed to change his strategy. He had not anticipated she would do things like refuse to eat, or stop talking altogether.

Leoben continued to take notes from the book, hoping that by pushing himself into his work, he would be able to get his mind off the depressing fact that he had no luck with Kara. If anything, he had lost ground because when she had pushed his head in a bucket of water, at least she was talking to him. He needed a new way to combat that because what he was doing now wasn't working, which was to get her into doing what he wanted, no _needed_ her to do, one step at a time. He hated himself for thinking of manipulating her but it may have to be done. She wasn't herself and Kara Thrace was who he had fallen in love with. Now she was just silent, biding her time for something, he was sure, but what, Leoben didn't know. It was one of those love/hate things, he loved she was so unpredictable, not weighed down by other, normal or conventional, ideas of thinking and yet, it made getting her to fall in love with him that much harder.

When the hands of the clock read eight o'clock, Kara moved from the sink. The dishes were done, and now maybe he could talk to her. She still had on her clothing from when she'd been captured, not trusting him enough to take it off except in a small interval for the bathroom and only when he wasn't there.

She hated it, being so trapped and in the fear he might do something to her, he sensed it. But he didn't know what to do, if he continued to tell her she was fine and he respected the closed door of a bathroom and the right to not be personally violated while sleeping she _still_ wouldn't believe him. _And why should she_, a voice in the back of his head taunted, _you led her and her fleet on a wild goose chase for a mystical nuke that never existed, you mix lies and truth until no one is quite sure which is which._

He was careful to keep her within his sight when she was nearby or close to him. His mind could easily wander and not notice she had snuck up behind him until she was close enough to try and kill him. Just this evening she had done that exact thing. It saddened him that he had to stop the woman he loved from snapping his neck in two, and yet, there was tiny part of him that relished in the contact between them. Even if it was only his hands on her wrists, it was a small taste of what would one day be his if he played his cards right, and besides, her skin felt right under his fingertips. It was hard, for her to be so close and yet so far away. She was intoxicating and once he started anything, Leoben wasn't sure he'd be able to stop himself. He had to keep a clear head or he would make an unforgivable mistake, the reoccurring vision of her embracing him and saying 'I love you' or his dreams of the little girl with Kara's face kept him believing she would be his, Leoben couldn't take any risk of jeopardizing that.

She was sitting with her back against the wall in the corner by the table, the left side of her body flushed against the floor-to-ceiling window the curtain pushed out of her way allowing her to look onto the outside world. He knew she missed it, she was the kind of person who hated being trapped, it was regrettable he had to keep her here while she learned to love him and deprive her of the free open sky. But she would get hurt out there, maybe even killed, he had to protect her, it was God's will.

He decided to drop by and see Caprica; she'd still been in her heartbroken state last he knew, hiding in her apartment all the time. Leoben had no idea what she was actually doing in there, and he wanted to check up on her. He had no worries about her dying or anything, they were cylons and could resurrect after all, but he wanted to see if there was anything he could do for her, make her a nice cup of hot tea maybe? He didn't know why it would help but people in books did it when the character was heartbroken or someone died, they had a nightmare or something horrible happened.

Leoben was struck by a sudden idea, maybe if he gave Kara a time he would be out and a time to return she would finally feel relaxed enough and comfortable he would not barge in on her so she would get cleaned up. He wouldn't say 'you can take a shower now' to her directly, or hint that she needed to get clean because Caprica had told him women got easily offended at that kind of thing, but hint at it hopefully subtle enough to plant the idea and get it going.

"I know it's late, but I need to run some things over with Caprica Six, I'll be back around nine thirty." he stated, and she didn't look up or indicate she had heard him at all. He sighed inwardly, and tried to get her to at least look at him, "Kara." He said gently and she looked up in spite of herself. "I said I'll be back at nine thirty" No response, not that he expected one he just wanted to make sure she heard.

"If you're asleep by then good night." He called down the stairs softly and she didn't answer him again. But at least she had spoken today, that was an improvement over silence, it seemed she would get to the point where she would speak more and more. She had spent years building the persona of Starbuck, someone who was definitely not ignored, Starbuck couldn't just go away and be cut loose from her mindset, and Starbuck was a highly verbal person. Eventually Starbuck would speak, and than would follow Kara. He could talk with her, earn her trust, get close to her the way God meant for them to be.

He turned the deadbolt lock with a smile at the thought of what was to come.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Her thoughts had been back over the day and she hated herself for giving in. To eating. But she had been hungry, she could go longer without food but she was not conditioned for starving herself or being starved a longer stretch of time. Her mother had forced her to go some days without food, getting her used to not being able to eat for much longer than her time in this cell.

How long had it been anyways, Three days awake? Four days, they were starting to blur already, with the sheer lack of anything to do around this apartment. She did menial house chores to alleviate the boredom but there was only so much you could do before you either got sick of the work or ran out of things to clean. She'd done exercises, running up and down the stairs, curl-ups, push-ups, planks, pull-ups. But it was hopeless, she wanted to run around in a big circle outside with the sand beneath her toes or play pyramid with Sam, neither of which she was able to do.

The clothes stuck to her body and she wished she could take them off and get new ones. But she didn't trust him, but if he was back at nine thirty...

But when she did start trusting a cylon's word, especially this cylon? Did he mean nine thirty in the morning or tonight or even nine thirty at all? The urge to go and get clean, getting stronger by every minute she remained seated at the wall, told her it would be okay. The urge to go get clean was even stronger however, whenever he looked at her. When that happened all she wanted to do was scrub her skin until the feel of his gaze was cleaned off and down the drain with the soap and grime.

Even now when she had heard the lock click, she thought she could feel it on her back. Ice blue eyes always watching, calculating, Starbuck wondered what he was going to do to her, he said he wanted her to love him, that he loved her already but it couldn't be true. She had put his head in a bucket of water again and again threatening to drown him each time. She had him physically abused. He was a cylon, he couldn't love anyway, never mind the reasons why otherwise.

She was off the floor before her mind could catch up, moving on autopilot and entering the bedroom before she stopped. Was she going to play right into his hands, would he come back and invade her privacy? She had lived on a battlestar for years; it wasn't as though she hadn't been seen naked by people around her before. But Leoben suddenly being that person made her nervous, edgy and feeling a little out of control. Which she hated, she was Starbuck, she was always in control, of her viper, the card game, she hated following orders for that exact reason.

But she didn't care anymore, she needed to wash it off, wash off the sweat, the silent tears that had fallen at night as the reality of her situation had crashed in on her, and Leoben's watchful sight. It needed to come off. Grabbing clothes at a hurried pace from the closet, not really caring if they fit or not, and she darted into the bathroom.

There were clean towels under the sink and she pulled one out and turned on the water. Then she set each piece of clothing along with her boots off to the side. She ran her hands over the walls and shower for a good fifteen minutes, determined to find any kind of monitoring device. Damned frackers were good at machines, spy ware, mechanical stuff, and could hide their toys really well. She couldn't find one.

She decided she didn't care anymore, she had a small reprieve, she should take it. Un-doing the zipper on her pants and yanking up her tanks she pulled the garments off and away from her skin. Her mind screamed it was a trick but she went for getting clean anyways, if something bad happened to her she would get through it, she had gotten through before, and she would get through again. It was far from comforting, but she was Starbuck for frack's sake, she could do anything right?

Stepping into the shower cubicle, she jumped back suddenly and almost fell down as the blast of hot water hit her unexpectedly and was much warmer than she had anticipated. Reaching through the spray to get the temperature down, she wondered how the hell he'd gotten hot water. She didn't know how this stuff worked; She knew vipers like the back of her hand but plumbing, no way. She could always ask Tyrol, if she ever saw Tyrol again. She sure as hell wasn't going to ask the cylon about it.

She hated herself on a level for it, but the water felt good to her skin. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had a decent shower, with hot water, and could take longer than five minutes in it. She scrubbed the dirt off until her skin was a slight pink color. The soap smelled like strawberries, the kind she had back on Caprica before the worlds' end.

Wrapped in the towel she wondered about how he knew this stuff, the soap scent, the layout of her apartment, the paintings. It seemed too close to just be coincidence. Stuff that had been hers- had he gone to her apartment and gotten it? It felt violating, the idea of him going through her stuff. But there was no other explanation for it, right? Not like he could go 'poof' and her stuff was there, he had to have gone to her apartment, broken in, and taken it. It had been stuff that wasn't in her apartment when she visited it with Helo.

So it had to have been earlier than when she and Helo made a stop when he went for her stuff. How long had he been watching her, known about her? How had he really found out about her mom and the things Socrata had said to her? It was only logical; his God didn't exist so there was no way for him to be told things from that like an Oracle of some kind. He must have been watching her for a long time, the thought is enough to make her sick, her stomach threatening to throw up the contents of her stomach.

As she pulled the tank top over her head, she looked in the mirror, having avoided it for the most part and she was struck by how different she looked. Just a week or so ago Sam had been coughing (but not too seriously) and she was mulling over the possibilities of a family. Now look at her: her green eyes aren't bright, but dull and blank with dark circles underneath as proof as her unwillingness to go to sleep beyond a doze, her wet hair is darker than normal and hangs in strings down the sides of her face, her face is ghastly, alabaster skin paler than normal. _All in all I look like death_ Kara concluded.

Her mind pangs back to Sam as she left the bathroom and went back to her perch at the window, leaving her old clothes on the floor and the towel along with them, since she would not place it on the rack next to the thing's towel. Off in the far distance she can vaguely make out where the pyramid court is and the shapes playing on it. Is one of them Sam's?

The door unlocks and the cylon returns, not saying anything to the pile of clothes left on the bathroom floor or the towel that covers them. He didn't say anything to her sitting at the window again, now freshly clean and still staring, hoping, praying for a way out of her prison. Her fingers reach in the edge of her boot and proceed to curl around the comforting blade of a knife hidden in her boot still, waiting to be used, should the need arise.

It's nine thirty, right on time, machines like routine, Leoben is no different. His shirt is still the same stupid green one he wore when she tortured him; he must have multiples and multiples of them.

He doesn't look at her, she watches from the corners of her eyes keeping him in range and he seems almost distracted, unsettled. For once he isn't the calm exterior of who she always knew him as, a wall and something unknown, inhuman, he seems rattled by something. She doesn't know if she cares or not.

"It's getting late." he says simply, and she resists the Starbuck urge to roll her eyes. "I'm going to sleep, would you like to join me?" Every night it's the same question in some form or another and every night so far she has shaken her head no. She always will shake her head no. No matter what he thinks or his stupid mind games, that answer won't change, she is married, she loves Sam and she won't do that to him. She can't, it's wrong and marriage is sacred, no matter what ridiculous garbage this cylon believes.

Kara shook her head back and forth a bit, not looking from her perch on the window. He leaves the living area and retreats to his bedroom without another word. The glass is cold against her face and damp hair, her left hand remains clenched around the handle of the knife, not trusting the cylon at all. She naps during the day, short little naps, waking up continually as to not be caught off guard. She spends the nights awake, not daring to sleep.

Leoben claims he wouldn't violate her when she is asleep, he would never hurt her in any way. He respects her privacy and will not disturb her while asleep. But the day Starbuck believes a cylon is the day when she can't believe anything anymore because she's dead, and last she checked, she was still breathing.


	12. Chapter 12

Before I space out again and forget, thanks to my friend, browneyednezumi, for betaing for me. And as always thank you all for your comments and for reading.

**Chapter 12-**

**Leoben-**

Leoben was miffed. True, not much rattled him, but this was, this was different. One of his most staunch supporters and the cylon who was like a sister to him, Caprica, turned on him. Or more accurately, questioned his sanity and wondered if his visions weren't true. Which was the biggest insult to him, very rarely did he see something that had its origin events changed and not come to pass.

_He'd left the apartment wondering if she would do as he had tried to get her to follow through with or not. Either way, he knew she would be glad to be out of his presence for a while. He secretly suspected she talked to herself just to hear someone other than him, but he would not install a camera to prove it. There were some things that were just too low, even for the cylons._

_He went down the last flight of stairs and passed a centurion, the red eye scanning him and recognizing him as cylon. He thanked the metal being, something he never understood why no one else did, it was as though they wanted their own rebellion or something, and arrived at Caprica's door._

_Knocking on the door, it took a minute for her to answer. Her blonde hair was bedraggled and she needed to wash it, his sensitive nose noted she hadn't showered in a while and she looked hollow, sunken. Her clothes were covered in wrinkles and disheveled. She looked surprised to see him. _

"_Can I come in?" He questioned, his mind thinking of half a dozen other things he could go do if she said no, he had said nine thirty and he was not about to show up back at the apartment just because. _

_She nodded. Caprica waved him in and he entered the domicile, noting how unlike her it was. There were dirty dishes in the sink and it appeared something had spilled on the counter. The place felt as unkempt as its owner looked and the open door leading to her bedroom revealed clothes all over the floor. It was a far cry from what he had come to know as Caprica Six's ways. She had always been so neat and clean, and Sixes demanded everything on a basestar be an exact certain way. Her apartment looked like a tornado hit it. _

"_I just wanted to see how you were, haven't seen you for the last couple days." He said quietly, and he felt guilty on the inside too. He had been so preoccupied with Kara and her silences and her refusal to eat that concern for his sister had been shoved back to the back burner. Cavil seemed to take a perverse pleasure to making sure this particular Two had a great deal of work to do as well, and all in all, when push came to shove he'd shoved Caprica. _

_She looked so deflated, so sad, not at all like the happy bouncing woman she had been a month or so ago when they were tracking down the humans. The reason had been hope. She'd had hope Gaius would still care about her the way she cared about him and she'd been rejected. _

"_I don't know what to do Leoben." She started sadly. "Can't eat, can't sleep, can't think. Three keeps yelling at me to go do something but I can't. I just can't go out there." he reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. Sometimes actions meant more than words. He couldn't possibly understand what she was going through and he couldn't pretend he did, it would make her angry. _

"_Do you want me to make you something? Tea or something? Hot Chocolate?" he offered her and she shakes her head no. Leoben wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. He wanted to make her feel better but he wasn't quite sure how to do that. For a couple minutes they just sat on the dark blue couch in her living area which is all bright and contemporary colors, all blues, not saying anything. He takes the time to look around her apartment, noting the excessive use of boxes and squares, and the dominant blue coloring. It's astounding what she came up with Leoben appreciated her work in silence. It wars not an awkward silence by any means. It never has been between them, she's his sister and he's her brother. They know everything about each other despite being able to access the others thoughts through the data stream. She tells him everything and vice versa. _

_After a few minutes of comfortable quiet she spoke again, desperate to get off the dominating yet unspoken topic of her own failed relationship. "How is it with Kara?" she asked softly, biting her lip, not knowing if it was a good question to ask or not. He doesn't mind, it gets him to confront the question of how to best answer that question._

We've made progress,_ he decided to himself. "She's overcoming her shock at the cylons coming back. She ate dinner today and spoke a bit." Putting in words made him realize just how little progress that was. From the look on her face Caprica knew that too and there was something else on her face Leoben couldn't identify. _

_Than his mind figured the expression on her face out. It was pity. It bothered him; he doesn't need to be felt sorry for. He knows Kara is going to be his, knows that little girl is their child, he knows it like he knows he's Leoben Conoy, Cylon Model Number Two, Representative for Model Number Two. _

"_What is it Caprica?" He couldn't bring himself to be angry that she thought that way about the blonde viper pilot and himself that way, not everyone could see the future. But a part of him wass still angry, didn't she believe him? She didn't expect Kara to just fall into his arms, or had she? What was she expecting to happen in the first place? _

"_Did she try and kill you again?" The Six queried and he nodded his head, having promised long ago he would not mix lies and truth to her. Six bit her lip again and said softly "I'm afraid for you Leoben."_

_Before she can say anymore he speaks up. "Why? If I die, I download, and each time it happens it's a learning experience. She's going to love me Caprica, I know it." _

"_But what if you're wrong?" She countered just as quickly. "What if what you saw has changed? What if it is just your fanciful mind creating it as to not disappoint you? What if her destiny doesn't lie with you?" _

_Leoben visibly flinched. He took his gift of seeing the future and the intuition that came along with his gift very seriously. No other cylon had his gift, and as such he felt very important he received the gift from God. To attack it, was a very low blow. _

_Sensing his simmering anger Caprica spoke up again her voice softer this time. "Leoben, I didn't mean to suggest anything else you see isn't true. I just want you to be happy and I don't know if you will be with Kara." He glanced up at the clock above her mantle place. 9:15, fifteen minutes till he was due back._

_Anger still coursed through his body rapidly at the suggestion he was just crazy, or a liar. "I need to get going." he said, his voice one of deadly calm. Leoben always was when he was upset, never one to snap in two and explode. He hadn't had a temper tantrum of any kind and hoped to never have one. Except around Jared, and those were to defend Kara. He's never ever hurt his sister, despite the sting of her words._

_He moved without thinking too much as he made his way to leave. Caprica looked at him with her dark blue eyes long and hard as he leaves out her doorway, sweatshirt and pants still hanging on her tall frame and her hair all over. "Think about what I said. Will this whole idea of yours really make you happy in the end?" Leoben didn't answer her._

_He sat by the fountain in the middle of the cylon apartment complex just watching the clear water come out the top of the fountain and into the bottom pool for a while until he was cold from the night's chill and had to go back inside. He pulled his green shirt around him tighter, not realizing just how cold the planet could get at night. _

_He went back on the route back home distracted, not at all like he had the entire universe figured out and he knew what you didn't. Or at least to some cylons and almost all of humanity he tried to project that image. Caprica knew better, but still, many of them doubted him and his abilities to make hard choices when they learned about Kara and what she meant to him. He had to prove them wrong. _

_Her sudden shift in support had rattled him. Through all of it Caprica had been the one person who believed him, believed in Kara and his future together. The fact he no longer had any of her faith in him and what he had seen was disturbing. The visions he had, of them, together, were not just his mind conjuring them up in fantasy, they were real, just like the vision that had told them where to find this planet. Just like the one that told them the perfect person to use to get inside the defense ministry. _

_Running up the stairs on the second level, he ran into a Three. Her red-ish hair waved around as she turned to see who it was. "Oh Leoben. Didn't see you there." Her accent drawled and he was reminded she was created to have an Aerilon accent. She smiled an and just empty smile before speaking to him again. "Don't forget, we need to have at least up to 100 yards from the city completed by the end of the week, we need that water canal finished. So don't hesitate to work the humans to the grind got it Two?"  
><em>

_He nodded absentmindedly, storing it in his mind. Three's brow crinkled a bit in confusion but she choose not to comment on his odd behavior and went back on her way. Something Leoben was relieved about. If Three had not realized what he saw came true she would have been one of the first people to call for him being boxed and put away forever. And that action would have had disastrous consequences all on its' own.  
><em>

_He checked the clock on the hall wall, it was almost time. He waited outside clenching the bars on the outer door a few moments collecting his thoughts and calming himself down. It wouldn't do him any good to go in there angry, even if it wasn't at her. Kara required a great deal of patience and he couldn't do that if he was already pushed closer than he would have preferred toward boiling point.._

_Putting his hand on the small square on the wall the door opened with a click and he pulled it open, nimbly stepping in before it swung shut automatically. He pulled his keys from his pocket and unlocked the door, still silently fuming. Who did Caprica think she was anyways? How could she possibly know what was going to happen, she couldn't see the future. It wasn't like she had all this expertise with love anyways. His mind thought spitefully before he felt shame for it. She was only trying to help, it had just made him angry that she had tried to interfere or say Kara wasn't going to end up with him. Because she was, he knew._

_He stood at the top of the stairs and looked down at the apartment. Kara was still in the same spot, playing with her left boot, though her hair is damp and she is in different clothes. He was silently quite pleased she went and got clean, even though it was a small victory. The light to the head is still on._

_Leoben moves calmly down the stairs, not overly staring at Kara, Caprica's words still in his head. He'll go talk to her again tomorrow, but for now he wasn't going to think about it too much or get angry. He walked over to the bathroom and takes in the pile of clothes on the floor. He wanted to clean it up, but Leoben knew better than to do it now. Turning around to Kara who was still blankly staring out the window he said quietly "It's getting late." _

_She didn't answer him. He didn't think she would after all, but it was always nice to hope she would because maybe just maybe today would be the day she answered. "I'm going to sleep would you like to join me?" he questioned as he has for the last few days since she woke up. Kara jerked her head side to side, blonde hair swaying a bit and he swallowed his disappointment. They'll be together eventually. Just not tonight.  
><em>

_He entered his room and shut the door as fast as he could. Leoben flicked the light on and sank down to the floor with his back pressed firmly against the door. _

Leoben's been sitting here a while now, and hasn't moved a while either. The clock reads 11:00 at night and he's no calmer than he was earlier. Maybe if he read a book, he could be able to fall sleep after reading something soothing like poetry.

Taking a moment to work out the kinks in his neck, he pulled himself up off the soft carpet, his body complaining about the sudden movement of position after being seated on the floor for so long. He silently wonders if Kara is still awake, he hasn't gone out during the night after he went to bed except for that first night. But he really wants the book, poetry always helped him calm his mind and go to sleep.

Flipping the switch and turning off the flow of electricity to the bulbs to not wake her up with the glow he steps out in the living room and looks for her. He doesn't see her, she's not outside in the living room where she had been sleeping on the couch nor is she by the window. Not to mention he would have heard her if she had gone out of the apartment and into the hall, so where was she?

He, for the first time, notices the light from beneath the office door and carefully makes his way over, his footsteps completely silent. His hand carefully held the door handle and pulled the office door open carefully to peek inside. At first he doesn't notice Kara curled asleep on the floor, a book of Katariss on the floor next to her about to close. She looks exhausted and must have finally fallen asleep due to her forcing herself to stay awake for long periods of time.

She's so beautiful when she is asleep, completely Kara. She had a certain calmness to her when she is asleep, she looks younger. She shifts in her sleep and something is troubling her in her dreams, he wants to be there to soothe the nightmares away, not let anything hurt her. But Leoben knows better than to bother her while asleep.

He goes to the living room and picks up her pillow and blanket and goes back to the office. He carefully puts the pillow under her head and blanket over her body. He pulls a bookmark down from the shelf and marks her spot in her book. He stops for a moment, unable to stop himself from looking at her sleeping form for just a while longer. She is his world, her pale skin glowing against her blonde hair.

Tearing himself away, knowing he would be in trouble with her if she caught him, he went to the shelf and pulled down a book from the shelf, poetry, not Katriss, Durrow. He carefully shut off the light and quietly shut the office door, not making any noise.

Going back to his room and settling down to read until his eyes get heavy, he decided to talk to Caprica Six in the morning. He'll get the work Three wants done and he'll make sure Kara eats her food again tomorrow and every day following if he can. Slowly he drifts off into dreamland while the lines of poetry began to blur together. His last waking thought is of the woman asleep on the office floor. And hoping she has pleasant dreams.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13-**

**Kara-**

When she woke up she felt the soft pillow under her head and a blue blanket keeping her warm from the room's chill. The very first thing her mind registered was that they had not been there when she fell asleep. It was dark in the office when she knew she'd left the lights on and the book had a bookmark in it.

Pushing the covers off of her body she stood up and stretched. This wasn't good, not at all, she thought furiously, he may have covered her up with a blanket and pillows, but what else had he done to her? She should have known better than to fall asleep, but she had been bored, and the book of poetry had been familiar. As a matter of fact there was a copy of the same book sitting in her storage locker on Galatica, which was probably light years away. Before she had known it, her eyelids were closing of their own accord and she was sucked into dreamland.

Nightmares had plagued her for as long as she could remember. It had become a fact of Kara Thrace's life, four out of seven days of the week she woke up often more than once in the middle of the night panting and shaking. It had used to be so bad she'd wake up screaming, but that had long since faded as ghosts of her past didn't become so much of a shock anymore. The fact she was stuck with about 10 of her co-workers in the bunkroom didn't hurt her learning to tolerate them, or at least make sure she was quiet and didn't whimper or cry when she was asleep, either.

The nightmare she'd had was one she hadn't had in a while. She had first started having it after she'd first tortured Leoben aboard the Geminion Traveler. Some of her worst childhood memories played out again for her: her father leaving, when her mother broke her fingers, her pyramid knee injury, and the wet and bedraggled Leoben was there to watch it all. He'd make comments here and there, how it was God's will and his way of leading her to finding him or whatever psycho babble he'd thought up this week. She always woke up before the dream could complete itself.

Her fingers reached into her boot and curled around the hilt of what had once been Admiral Cain's pocket knife. She hoped wherever the woman's soul had ended up she would help Kara through this, despite the short time she had known her. Kara had respected her and sought to please her, because Lords knew she hadn't been able to please her mother. Kara needed a more than a bit of the deceased Pegasus Commanding officer's hard, fiery, ruthlessness right about now.

She moved carefully out of the office, just in case Leoben happened to still be lurking about, she moved across the living room floor with practiced stealth. The clock on the hall was hit by one of the planet's two moon's light reading three or so in the morning. Perfect time to strike, if all was well he would be asleep right about now. She didn't know what exactly the cylon had done to her, but he had disturbed her while sleeping. At the very least he had watched her sleep. At the very most he had invaded her personal space while she was asleep, and that was unforgivable.

Not even Sam, Zak, or Lee had ever done such a thing; they knew that when she was asleep she was not to be messed with if only due to fear of their own health. Starbuck had no intentions of anyone seeing her sleep or the nightmares that plagued her, much less bother her. Everyone knew you didn't bother anyone while sleeping, bunkroom and rooming etiquette 101.

The fact the cylon had broken it, and acted like he cared about her to farther fuel his insane idea that he was in love with her and she would one day fall in love with him too bothered her. He was cylon, she was a human. It was that simple. Helo and Sharon had been different, because she had changed because of her time pretending to be human. Leoben had no such excuse, he was a cylon, he pretended there was a nuke on one of their ships, he'd nearly strangled her and attacked guards. Cylons had destroyed her entire civilization; they had launched nuke after nuke after nuke to destroy her home worlds. They were evil, but she, she was human. And while humans could be evil they could be good too. She had seen some of the worst human evils in her time, and yet she knew the goodness existed somewhere too, it was part of the reason she had gone into the military in the first place.

Shaking her head a moment or two to help get her mind back into the game plan she considered her MO. Obviously she would have to send a message to the cylon that bothering her while sleeping was not tolerated, but how. Throwing a fit wouldn't serve her purposes nor would it get the message across. So she would have to send the message to him the only way she knew how, violence.

Her long, tapered fingers slid the blade out of the pocket knife's handle, which she decided to keep in her right hand. These fingers, were, if you looked close enough, slightly crooked in the same spot. Kara was ambidextrous, she had to be, considering how many times both of her arms had been broken as a child, but she favored her right hand. Maybe because it was the hand she liked to write with the best, or because her paintings and drawings always seemed to turn out better when she used it, she didn't know.

Padding as quietly as she could, something she had also learned from her days under Socrata Thrace's 'care', she carefully found the door knobs handle and turned it ever so slowly as to not wake him up. She didn't know how sensitive he was, but she had learned how to do this quietly, sneaking out of her room for food, leaving for parties and clubs as a teen, and sneaking out of the enemy territory in the Basic Training exercises. She made it in and padded softly to where he appeared to be still sleep.

Three fifteen now, or so the digital clock on the dresser across the room said, the blue glow of the numbers the only real light in the room besides a night light next to the closet. Why in the name of the Gods would a cylon need a nightlight? What was its' purpose, did he have sight issues or something? Sharon had confirmed cylons were like humans, only they could see, hear, smell much better than a human could. So why did a cylon need a nightlight?

Pushing the distraction to examine it later she carefully approached the bed where he was asleep, curled up like a little kid. He slept on his hands, clasped together under his chin like a prayer. His neck was blocked, it was the quickest place to kill him, the back of his neck would be too much to risk, as she would have to reach over him or go from the other side of the bed, both of which left her exposed.

The chest was a no as she would have to shift the covers and that might wake him up, She decided what she was going to do was to grab his hands and move them carefully away as possible, if there was resistance she would push them out and go straight for the kill. Not a textbook plan, but she did live outside of the box.

Pulling her right arm with the pocket knife primed for leverage her left hand carefully moved forward to gently push his hands out of the way. She moved very slowly, taking her time, carful. You need patience to be a hunter, something she was not known for but, at times like this, she had an abundant amount of it. It was so odd, she could pull off things that required an almost Godlike amount of patience, and yet, when it came to other things in real life, she had almost none of it. Oh, the list went on, waiting for Lee and realizing it was never going to happen, waiting to get to go back for Sam, waiting for the shower even. But this, she was a hunter, and now Leoben was prey.

Pity there wasn't a bucket of water around.

Her left hand slowly clasped around his wrist and carefully pulled one of his hands away, giving her a small opening. Almost there, she would kill him in his sleep, he would go download and she could get some peaceful hours of rest knowing no cylon creep was watching her sleep.

The hand she had just moved shot up and grabbed her left wrist itself_. Frack_. She was no match for a cylon. Not that she wasn't going to try. Pulling backwards, another hand came up to try and wrap itself around her torso and stop her where she stood. Leoben had already gotten to his feet and she tried to backpedal, hoping it would give her an opening. He clearly had no idea of knowing that Starbuck didn't give up. Starbuck always won, always came back, and always killed the most cylons. That fact did not change juts because she had gotten herself caught by the cylons and was now apparently playing house with them.

She shifted her weight forward, her right arm coming and neatly drawing a line on his right shoulder down to his elbow. The cut wasn't threatening to his life, much to her dismay but it had to hurt. The hiss of pain that accompanied it only spurred her to attack more. Fight or frack, and since there was no way in Hades she would ever frack a toaster, that left fighting.

He was too strong, if she didn't do something she would quickly be overwhelmed and her only weapon would be taken from her. That couldn't happen. Pushing herself forward and unsettling his balance she let him get a hold of her torso and as he reached for the knife, she kept it just out of his reach and instead leaned forward again.

Starbuck wasn't sure what the hell she was doing, but she had one chance, one chance to make this work. Acting on pure instinct, she leaned forward and attacked his mouth with hers, running her tongue over his bottom lip and pushing itself into his mouth. She was slightly surprised his lips were so soft and he was very surprised by her own actions. His shock at her action was the only opening she needed.

Her right arm slipped free of his grasp and she shoved the blade that had seen two wars now into his throat, causing him to bleed instantly. Starbuck pulled away from him and leaned against the wall, panting, blood on her clothes and hands and the knife firmly in her grip.

The cylon lay on the floor of the bedroom he had predicted they would one day share. His blue eyes looked sadly at her, and what else was in them? Was it Love? Why would he love her, she questioned, she killed him, three times now if you counted when he had been airlocked. She was angry, on her way to leave the room and he was getting near death.

Kara lashed out, kicking him square in the ribs on her way to leave. "Don't come near me asleep again or next time will be more painful." She promised, and waited outside until she was sure he was dead. Truth be told her mind couldn't stop wondering why she had done what she did. She kept on telling herself the kiss was the only way to distract him, it meant nothing.

Kara knew what would happen if she started to think it meant anymore than that. It meant the cylon won. And she was not going to let him win. She was married to Sam, a man who loved her very much. There was no room for the cylon, even if he wasn't a cylon, obsessed with her to the point of locking her in an apartment all day, there wouldn't even be room for him if she was single and just looking for a good time with someone. For someone reason she had never really liked blondes, despite being one herself.

She prayed to the Gods for forgiveness for what she had done against Sam. She prayed they understood her reasoning and didn't punish her or Samuel for her act. Kara had no intentions of being unfaithful to her husband, something few had ever expected from her. Marriage was a sacred bounding between two people, she would not dare think of doing such a thing to it.

Kara took a deep breath and stepped back into the room. From what she knew of the cylon downloading process he'd be gone for a couple of hours. Relief flooded through her when she saw he was really dead. No more worrying if he would suddenly arrive and interrupt whatever she was doing.

Moving back towards the closet she pulled out a new set of clothes and darted into the bathroom. Her old clothes was still there, great what a pair of clothes, a lived in for about a week pair and ones she'd worn while killing a cylon.

Out of sheer boredom she went to the side of the vanity and scratched in one tic mark, than another. Two times she had gotten the best of him. Kara spent another few moments staring at her creation than turned on the shower again for the second time today. She had some fake blood to wash off.

**Sam-**

His sister in all but blood and pyramid team-mate Jean had come over to help him out a bit. Despite being ill still, though the worse was behind him, the cylons forcing him to work didn't help him any with getting better. He was still coughing and nowhere near as productive as he would be healthy.

But he didn't have a choice; he had to keep his head down. He couldn't draw any attention to himself, not just because he was a popular well liked person, hero of the Caprica resistance, but because of Kara. Being the husband of the most famous Viper jock the fleet knew meant he was recognized more for Kara's accomplishments than anything from his pyramid days. As all things, it came at a price, he had already learned that the model Twos were after Kara, though for better or worse seemed to vary, and Sam knew they might use him against her or vice versa.

Lying down covered in blankets, another coughing fit seized his body and Jean passed him water. He and Jean went back, way back, way back to when they were being scouted. They had tried a love relationship but quickly realized they were better friends than lovers or frack buddies. Not that the press hadn't coined them as a cute couple or some random bit like that, they were just simply best friends. The closet example he could think of to describe what he had with Jean was Kara and Helo.

He gulped down the liquid, the drink soothing his throat for a while. Sam leaned back against the pillow, which was starting to finally lose the scent of his wife.

It made him so frustrated, she was probably in some cell somewhere, shivering and in pain, while he could barely stand after a while of working. _Some husband I am_ Sam realized bitterly. _I can't even save my own wife from cylons after everything she did for me. _

Jean was reading some piece of paper that had been on the table. "Hey Sam you seen this?" Sam grunted a no, and Jean brought it over to him, her ponytail holding her long red-hair swishing as she did so. She passed the corner-less paper to him and he unfolded the paper curiously.

The handwriting was a neat like precision, if not for a few irregularities here and there he would have thought it had been typed on a computer. It wasn't anyone's hand-writing he recognized. No one had hand-writing like this, he would have remembered it.

While the handwriting was odd what the note said was far more important.

"_I know where Kara is."_

That was all. No name, no nothing. He looked at Jean who seemed just as confused as he was. He shook his head at the unspoken question of 'did he know who had written the note?'. This had to be some cylon trick or a cruel prank. But_ I know where Kara is_, he'd show it to the insurgency tomorrow or whenever the next meting was.

"Want me to hang onto it?" Jean offered, and he gratefully handed the paper to her. If he didn't get it out of his sightline he would start to go crazy. Kara was the only thing he had left anymore, the fact someone was using her to tease him, play with him, was disturbing in itself. What kind of person dangled information like that in front of someone unless it was a cruel game?

Jean silently made her leave then, and Sam was left in his once shared tent all alone. He tried to fall asleep than, only to be unable to. His imagination dredged up the kind of horrors she could be going through, maybe they had tried to put her in a farm again? Sam shuddered and it had nothing to do with the cold temperature.

After a while exhaustion from the day's work took over and he drifted into an uneasy but uneventful sleep. No nightmares tonight, for which he was grateful. He was given a day of rest tomorrow, of course it coincided with the cylon calendar instead of the colonial but he wasn't complaining, he wouldn't have to go build a water system tomorrow and could actually get better. And than, maybe than, he would be able to rescue Kara.

Note: In my BSG universe, the movie Razor happened except for the bit at the end where the hybrid on the old Basestar told Kendra Shaw "Kara Thrace is evil, will lead them all to their end is the harbinger of death" etc. I was never happy with the whole she's bad news plot-line and so that would be eliminated, but everything else in Razor stands, And since Kara had the pocketknife at the end from Shaw, who got it from Cain, I assume she kept it. Of course Thanks to my beta, and another note that since school starts up soon, it may have an impact on update frequency.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14-**

**Leoben-**

Leoben woke up alone in the downloading tank, not that he minded waking up alone, he'd certainly done it often enough to get used to it. It was the middle of the night and everyone was supposed to be asleep right now. Or just waking up he realized, his brain noting what time it actually was on the clock across the room, red letters showing the time and date. Six in the morning. Thank God today was the cylon day of rest or he would barely be able to function which would have a whole host of other unpleasant side-effects. Downloading was a tiring process, and it made him feel like a stranger in his own skin for ages after a download. He would be clumsy, unsteady as a new born colt after a while. The bodies were identical, but it still felt odd, like a stranger in someone else's skin.

But despite the download, Leoben was currently sitting mentally on cloud nine. Figuratively on cloud nine, not the exploded luxury liner of the rag-tag human fleet, the Cloud Nine expression humans had used to express a mental place of great happiness. Because the woman in his dreams had kissed him, and even though it was only to surprise him enough to kill him, Leoben didn't much care. She had kissed him and he would take what he could get, it may be pathetic, but he didn't care about that. He had thought of little else but what had occurred shortly before the knife entered his neck, since waking up.

The more he analyzed it, the more he realized it might do more harm than good if she assumed this tactic, as enjoyable as he found it. Kara had always used sex as a defensive mechanism, using it to hide herself away and to fight back. If he fell into the role of frack-buddy, or allowed himself to get caught up with it, it might be impossible to get out. Sex and love were different things to her, or so he had come to learn from studying her and visions of her past. If he fell into that role, if he let himself fall into that role, she would be able to keep herself closed off and there would be nothing he could do about it. He wanted her love, not just her body. He wanted nothing more than her everything, and gave himself in return.

He pulled on some clothes haphazardly, not much caring about what clothes they were, except that he was adequately covered enough to go outside. Sixes had tried to put together clothes to wear so you could just grab the thing on a hanger but very few cylons had actually taken them seriously about it. He didn't know what it was with them, but they felt everything had to, match or something. Something about color schemes, undertones and colors that brought out his eyes. Or some ridiculous thing like that, Leoben had never paid much attention to the clothes on his back except to give thanks to God they were there. He had listened to Caprica ramble on about it but never given it much mind.

Some part of his mind wondered if Kara would care if they matched and dismissed the idea as frivolous. Kara didn't care about such things, and he wouldn't have to go about asking Sixes for fashion advice. Besides, he rather liked this green shirt, although if Caprica had her way she would throw it out for it being too 'loud'. Or burn it, along with most of his wardrobe.

Exiting the resurrection rooms and heading down towards the landing bay to grab a heavy raider and head back down to the surface, resurrection would stay on the ships until a secret hub was created on the planet. It would be a tempting target for the humans and as Kara's raid had proved, they were not above blowing up grounded basestars. If they lost their resurrection they would be crippled, and it would be an opportune time for a human strike, farther taking the idea of living in peace away.

Not watching where he was going, in his clamminess, Leoben ran right into the One's Line Representative, the older cylon glaring at him. This One was a rather cunning cylon, and had been the main planner in the destruction of humanity. This One seemed older than the rest, smarter too, there was just something about him Leoben could sense was lurking behind the dark, nearly black eyes. They were cold, expressionless, un-flinching and cruel. This One had boxed many of his own due to 'programming difficulties' which Leoben had found abhorrent. Cylons like Jared, which deserved to be boxed and put away from others, human or cylon, yes the deserved the cold storage. But some seemingly normal Ones with no bad marks against them, did not deserve to be forever stuck on a computer hard drive.

Jared, however, had found favor with this One and as such the cylon man in front of him was the only reason the brother cylon had not been put in cold storage that than got erased. Leoben would love to do nothing more to Jared. Jared posed a threat to him, to Kara, and to countless others. His behavior towards the people down on New Caprica was enough of a crime alone already. Going through lines and lines of defenseless people, attacking, stealing, Leoben's only comfort about his inablity to get the monster boxed was that the day would come when God judged Jared for his crimes.

To top it off, this One, or John Cavil as everyone referred to him, hated Leoben. Oh politically he could do nothing about it as Leoben could see things in the future and four models besides his own respected that, leaving him with a majority. He would quickly be outvoted on any measures he chose to take against Leoben, leaving the One with nothing more than snide comments and acting like a young teenage girl, back-stabbing, drama creating, snooty young teen-age girl. Something many cylons seemed to find hilarious, mush to his confusion. He'd had to endure being the butt and punch line of so many jokes. Leoben just wished he could glue the man's mouth shut sometimes. However, unlike with Jared, he couldn't do cylon against cylon violence especially for something as small as 'a joke'. Jared he could do as much as he could, except box him, being he was a part of his own model. But not John Cavil, the One was another kettle of fish altogether.

"So Leoben, you and what's-her-face get a little too rough?" The One was baiting him, seeing how he would respond, a smirk pulling up the edge of his mouth and eye glinting with the promise of a chalengee. Leoben pushed his temper down. No one was allowed to comment about Kara, he could be the brunt of many jokes, and he would bear it, but they had to leave Kara alone. She didn't deserve it, and besides, he hated hearing it about her. None of them had the right to judge, even more so when they had never met her.

"No we did not." Leoben replied icily, a cue if any to back off. It only seemed to encourage John, the man's smirk turning into a smile as though Leoben was just not going to admit the truth. One took another step closer while he was walking determinedly toward the landing bay to take a heavy raider down to the surface. And than go back to bed and take a nap for a few hours. He wasn't going to get his temper up, he was not going to let now be the time he finally lost his control. Nope, he was just going to ignore him and walk straight ahead, and the day when Kara finally rested in his arms sit back and laugh at him.

Cavil looked like he was going to say something else but they passed a Simon's lab, the same Simon who had insisted on the farms to study reproduction in hopes of getting a hybrid. It was the same idiot who had gotten Kara Thrace in his grasp and gotten her to run away by getting her suspicions up. The very same one who had also neglected to tell him they had her in their custody until after they had removed one of her ovaries, at that point making it too late, something Leoben was still angry about. They could be closer now, if only the moron had not made a stupid elementary mistake.

"This is my stop." Cavil said without warning and flung open the door and entered without even knocking.

Leoben watched with slight interest as the older cylon shut the door quickly behind him. He hadn't known Cavil was visiting with one of the Fours, let alone enough to enter without knocking into that certain four's lab. Each Four had their own personal lab and it was taboo to go in their space without asking as it was with any model. Most of the copies each had a place that was special to them, and Leoben and just about everyone else knew not to break the rule of entering without asking unless it was an emergency. It was rude.

The Two pushed the oddity out of his mind; it was none of his business really. He shouldn't pry anyways, it was not his place to judge or condemn what they were doing, unless it was ethically wrong and would anger God, in which case he felt the need to intervene. They could just be having a chat or something, he needed to stop jumping to conclusions. Returning his thoughts back to what he was doing, Leoben returned to his quest to get a heavy Raider down to the surface.

He kept going over the events of the past few hours in his mind, euphoria she had kissed him was dulled by the fact she was using his attraction to her against him. It was clever and again something he had not expected from her. But what could he expect from her really? She was so unpredictable, defying logic simply by existing. She had managed to survive her mother, Zak's death, a nuclear holocaust, and so many things after. Logic pointed to her not being there right now, but she was. God was watching out for her, more proof that their destines were entertained.

Climbing into the Heavy Raider with another Eight as a pilot he ran through some of the facts about his current home situation in his head. Kara had a knife and was clearly not afraid to use it, and she had somehow gotten it in the apartment despite the initial searches they had done of her. _Because a knife wielding angry Kara Thrace was just what they needed. _His mind remarked at him sarcastically, sounding remarkably like a certain annoying two who loved to tease him, he'd have to get it away from her, somehow.

The Eight seemed distraught, distracted, and Leoben felt himself wondering why, he had exited the datastream an hour ago and nothing had seemed amiss to him. Leoben hesitantly, knowing how easily an Eight could change their emotions, asked her if she was okay. She just shrugged her shoulders. Leoben knew better than to push, Eights would talk when they were ready, a fact he had learned from Boomer, and pushing them to do something they didn't want to do was a recipe for disaster.

"Another Eight, Sandra, didn't check into her post half an hour ago. She's missing." She finally remarked. Leoben was forcefully reminded that they were occupying the human settlement and humans were not too thrilled about the change in status quo. There had been riots, gun fire, actual fires, and vandalism. Whoever it was, they were busy busy people. Despite keeping the people being questioned and imprisoned about the acts of violence, keeping people busy and imposing curfew, the attacks continued and it forced him to realize things existed outside of his comfy little bubble with Kara.

"Has she downloaded?" Leoben asked before he could stop himself. He was concerned, cylons did not just go poof, and than they were gone.

The eight perused her lips and glared at him for asking the question. "No." She answered back curtly and full attitude, letting him know in no uncertain terms he was an idiot for asking such a stupid question. "She's the second one to disappear." It was worrying news, cylons were starting to disappear and not be found or download. They had to be somewhere, but wherever they were was well hidden. No one was able to track them or had any idea of where they had gone, it was as though they had stopped existing all of a sudden. It scared him.

The rest of the ride was spent in silence, Leoben's mind a jumble of ideas and too little time to think of them. And he still needed to talk to Caprica later today. That was a meeting he did not look forward to, a part of him was still hurt the sister thought his love for Kara was wrong, and that his visions of them together were wrong, and that Kara would never love him. But he needed to mend the fences, she was a good sister after all, and she was only trying to watch out for him. It didn't hurt any less though.

He tiredly stumbled his way from the landing strip and back inside the apartment building. As his shoes made a clacking sort of noise against the concrete, he silently cursed himself for putting himself on the upper floors but there was nothing he could do about it now. It was a measure of safety to ensure she would be unharmed should humans manage to get in the lower sections of the buildings. He sishghed to himself, it didn't make the walk up any less tiring.

Finally arriving at the front door he pulled himself inside and down the stairs, careful not to trip over his own feet. It was just starting to get light outside but the apartment was still mainly dark. Kara was on the couch under her blanket and he assumed sleeping peacefully, Leoben resisted the urge to go check on her, he didn't want to download again. After his previous experience he had learned the lesson of he was not to bother her while sleeping, even though he wouldn't do anything to her. She had to know that somewhere, he'd never hurt her. He _loved_ her.

The bathroom still had her two sets of clothes on the floor, some just worn for a long time and some with blood on them. The towel was covering up some of the articles of clothing. Another thing to clean, he mused to himself. He opened the bedroom door and shut it behind him. He'd do it later. Right now he needed some sleep, badly.

* * *

><p><strong>Laura- <strong>

Today was a day of rest, not that the people in the camp would be getting any. Really how could you rest easy when those, those _things_, were walking around among the people? How anyone could be at ease, or even be expected to be at ease, around those cylons was really beyond her. They were most likely looking for weapons, or insurgents. Or maybe their missing cylons as Laura had discovered this morning.

She sat in her tent, mulling over the most recent development. Some of the insurgency had gone after cylons, and had already kidnapped two and held them far out from the city in a cave. The cave was relatively unguarded should any shiny metal show up, no one would be able to put a face on any of the insurgents, when the cylons were fed they kept bags over their heads and communicated through the computer reading out their questions. AS fool-proof as it was ever going to get she supposed. The two Eights, one named Meghan and another who called herself Sandra, the new one, were kept tied up, in different cells, and seemingly unaware of the other's presence. Laura had not even known it existed until a few minutes ago, when Tyrol had come by and felt the need to inform her about it.

Laura Roslin had to admit it was a good tactic, the Admiral would think so, it was definitely bothering the cylons. She already started to notice most of them walking in pairs whenever they went out among the human population. The only question was, if they escaped from their prison, what the insurgency do then? Humans would be in trouble, but if they measures to protect identity were as fool-proof as the former deck chief assured her than the only problem would be finding a new place to keep them.

On some level Laura wondered if what they were doing was wrong. They were taking prisoners, subjecting them to harsh conditions, interrogating, not torturing, them for information on cylon's plans. The only other argument she could think of was once they ran out of information and still had to be cared for as to not download, it would take lots of resources to be kept alive, and surely they would be found eventually. Or they would just be harder to kidnap.

But the former President of the Twelve Colonies could do nothing against it. Despite being a part, she was not in charge of it; something she had discovered bothered her during her time on the surface of New Caprica. She had grown so accustomed to being the one to call the shots when she suddenly did not, she was bothered. Laura Roslin had gotten accustomed to the Presidency, and now, she felt like she didn't fit in anywhere.

She watched as a group of Centurions stomped by, metal clanking together as their red eyes watched the humans scuttle by, no one wanting to attract their glowing gaze. The former President clenched her fists, wishing nothing more than being able to rip them apart piece by piece. The sudden blood-lust surprised her, she always considered herself to be a calm rational person, preferring to solve things with diplomacy instead of force like Richard Adar, her predecessor as president, had.

The cylons though, were just like the man had been. People were to work and work hard, with little to no benefits, they fact they weren't shot was to be enough, and that all the people weren't dead was supposed to make them grateful. She had gotten her lesson plans recently, and they included lessons on how nice and peaceful the cylons were, and all about their cylon God.

Laura wouldn't do it, not only because it went against everything she believed in, but in her lessons she tried to be as unbiased as possible, this wasn't a lesson, all of it was propaganda favoring the cylons and their machines. The humans were the monsters, the cylons were peace loving people who didn't want to hurt anyone but the humans forced them. Right, because humans had pointed a gun at the cylons and forced them to launch nuke after nuke after nuke onto their home world, leaving the children homeless in a rag-tag fleet of ships then proceed to hunt them down and try to kill them whenever they got the chance. _So peaceful indeed_ she fumed.

Stepping out of her tent, she decided to take a walk around the camp-site. It was early morning, the light not quite out yet but streaks were across the cloudy dismal sky. You wouldn't be able to see sunlight much today, far too cloudy for that. There were spots that got it here and there but not always. Sometimes it was nice out, and it really felt like she was under the Caprican sun again.

Laura moved through the city, marveling at how the air felt against her skin. The very air felt different. It had only been just over a week since the cylons had come and yet this place had lost any hope it had ever held for the people. Before the occupation New Caprica had represented a new start, a new world and for those who dared dream it a new place to forever call home. Now it was all washed away with a greater sense of hopelessness covering the air, an abundant amount of it filled the air like electricity; it felt like the attacks all over again.

She passed a few of her friends on their way to the market place, just briefly waving before continuing on their way. She took comfort in these little bits of contact, you may see them disappear or hear they were dragged away the night before. Nothing made her want to go and destroy centurions more than a little boy who had come to school yesterday crying because the cylons took his mommy away from him, leaving him to the care of their neighbors. How did she soothe the child, when his mommy may indeed never come back?

Rounding a corner she ran into a D'Anna model, looking at her and smiling. It was unsettling just how human they were, how well they impersonated the very people they were trying to destroy. She remembered sitting on Colonial One and meeting another copy, or it could be this copy for all she knew, to do a story on the people of Galactica. Her last thought had not been whether the woman was a cylon or not, it was whether this story idea of her's to get the people to calm down would come back to bite her where it hurt. How stupid she felt.

"Ahh Laura Roslin. Just the person I was looking for." Her Aerielon accent drawled and Laura forced herself to stand still and not give her satisfaction. Laura had wondered when they would come for her, being the former President it would have been unavoidable unless she had been on one of the ships that jumped away. She looked up at the sky, taking in the clouds and the patches of sunlight shining through. "I'm going to need to come with me." the cylon's manicured hands wave at a couple Centurions who stand on both sides of the former school teacher turned president turned school teacher again. Their metal hands reach out and grab her upper arms, leaving scratches and causing her to bite her lip to keep from crying out.

"Well come on _Madame President_, haven't got all day have we?" The cylon mocks and turns and struts towards the New Caprican dentition center, and the metal cylons force her to follow. She walks by and sees people freeze in their places, silently communicating to her with their eyes. Pity, and the promise to spread the word. It's the only thing they can do as she is forced to walk or let her arms get ripped to shreds by the metla fingers they have fashioned for themselves.

She had told Maya to flee should she ever become captured, to hide out with the resistance, she needed to make sure Maya got the message. Because Maya and Isis, could not, under any circumstances at all, be captured by the cylons. Isis was far too important to be let into enemy hands. Laura thought to herself, looking at as many people as she could, trying to make sure they might know who she was and tell the in case it was the last anyone saw of her.

* * *

><p>Note: The disappearing cylons was put in this story after I heard Ron D Moore's pod-cast of the season opener of Season 3, I forget which episode it was for but one of the first two which mentioned they were going to have the cylons disappearing instead of the suicide bombers that had the cylons freaking out. I liked the idea of the cylons disappearing and being picked off and decided to include it in this story as well. and my extreme apologies for the late chapter, my beta and I've been so busy with school I never got this edited.<p> 


	15. Chapter 15

**Note: Life has been busy and my beta is to so this if self edited so there are probably more than a couple mistakes, all of which are mine and I apologize for. As always thanks for reading and I'd love it if you reviewed. **

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 15-<strong>

**Kara-**

When she woke up, Leoben was nowhere to be found. At least where she was anyways, which meant he might have gotten the clue to leave her alone. The cylon knew so much about her, her history, her mom, it made her shiver. Just how long had they been watching her? How long had Leoben known about her before she knew about his existence? Had he ever been in her apartment before the nuclear holocaust? And why was she so special anyways?

Her mother had told her she was special, that she had a destiny, a fate, and that she had a gift. Kind of odd considering Kara had also been told she was a screw up. A gifted screw-up, who couldn't learn how to use her Gods given talents and hurt everything she touched.

The hands on the clock said ten in the morning, and Kara grudgingly pulled herself off the couch, which was uncomfortable enough to give her back aches that reminded her of days spent sleeping on the floor of her closet. She wished desperately she was still in her cot, with the warm body of Sam next to her. She hadn't known how much she missed it, sleeping with someone else, until she was forced to be alone again. But this time it was more of a choice, because she'd promised herself she would never betray humanity like that.

Raising her arms above her head, Kara gently stretched out her muscles, pulling them tauter and tauter until she can feel the pull of the stretch. It felt good, it felt alive. Rolling her neck to work out the kinks for the first time in the past few days she fully assesses her situation. Before she had been in shock, anger, and unable to think clearly due to hunger. Now she was hungry, but her body had more energy to burn towards a totally-nutts-out-of-the-box-plan-that-would-make-perfect-Lee-Adama-throw-a-hissy-fit idea.

She knew she had been captured by cylons. She knew they wanted her for something. She knew they were playing mind games with her, the fact this apartment and her own were mirror copies was not a coincidence by any means. She knew Leoben seemed to have an obsession with her.

So than, she thought, to escaping. She'd have to use the door, windows were three stories up and she didn't have a nice soft cylon to land on this time. Besides, there was no way dead or alive she could shatter that glass, something they had obviously gone to great lengths to produce. How special she felt.

After a few minutes of contemplating the bedroom door opens, and Leoben exits, for one of the first times since she had been dunking his head in a bucket of water, he looks disheveled, tired, and completely frazzled. He must have come straight home from his nice comfy downloading tank and straight to bed so he could go to sleep. Good to know, extra tiredness after a download.

Neither of them say anything, something for which she is grateful. She just used anything she could to kill him, and if she had to use his apparent infatuation with her, so be it. It was only surviving; she had refused to feel guilty about anything she'd done in the past, except maybe Baltar, she wouldn't feel guilty about it now. Just because she was married, held by a psycho cylon who didn't actually have feelings, just thought he did, and was stuck in an apartment while cylons slowly got rid of the last of her people, might have put a damper on some people's mood. Not her's. It was something that had to be done, as a soldier she understood that. Do whatever you need to do to get your mission accomplished.

Didn't mean it wouldn't haunt her for days to come, her mother's voice echoed in her head, laughing at her while confirming her suspicions about Kara, claiming that she'd been right from the start. That she is a nothing, a slut, the worst of the worst, and should have never been born.

She notices he is watching her out of the corner of his eyes, caution marking his every movement. He silently makes his way to the kitchen, looking like he would prefer to be asleep another couple hours. Well it wasn't as though she had forced him to come out and make food to eat. He could sleep till he died, again, for all she cared. She could feed herself thank you very much.

Not wanting to remain in the room with him, Kara prowled into the bathroom and sank onto the floor while he worked, not wanting to admit she was hungry, and wanted to get back into the regular habit of eating. If she was going to escape the habit of not eating would have to go, she needed her strength, and since if she didn't eat she would get dizzy when she did push-ups.

She doesn't really know what to do except bide her time and wait, certainly not encourage _it_. Her thoughts drift again to Sam, what he is doing, where's he's at, if he's feeling okay. She really should be up in the running for the worst wife award or something, get yourself kidnapped and unable to get out of this prison apartment while your husband may be stuck in a tent dying of pneumonia.

After fifteen minutes she decided there's nothing left to do here, and exits the room. The dull monotony of sitting around and her inability to sit still work against her, forcing her to move about. As she stood in the bathroom door-way, she took in the scene, all the while trying to appear like she's not really looking. Leoben's flipping pancakes on the oven burner, and the sun is shining through the windows. A nice day, they were rarities on this planet. Once again she wishes, if futilely, that she could be outside, running races with Sam again, kicking up sand and driving people nuts. It seemed like the last time it had happened it had been ages ago. _Gods please let me escape and see Samuel again._

Kara has made herself promise not to spend so much time looking, to do nothing to let this machine know how desperately she wants outside. The Galactica made up for being such an inclosing space by letting her fly, the planet made up for her loss of wings by being open and free. This apartment made up nothing; it was a prison, a nice one, but nevertheless a gilded cage. Now she didn't have her wings or her freedom and was closed in. Put in a box, left on the side to be forgotten about. Except by Leoben, and she wasn't sure which was worse.

The second she had graduated the academy, she had vowed to herself nothing would ever close her in again. She would only be somewhere she wanted to be, Zak had understood that, calling her a force of nature, something like the wind. Zak had been on her mind so much more lately, maybe it was because in this prison she had nothing better to do than think. It forced her to confront things, things she had run away from so long through a variety of means. Her methods of coping cut off, and she was only left with her ghosts and the thoughts they brought.

And her thoughts were loud. Deafening in fact, sometimes, when she was alone in the apartment, she could hear things she had tried to forget. A little girl's tears as the door broke her fingers, a viper crashing onto the tarmac, a gun-shot echoing around a bar. They came back full force, ready to tear her apart again, just like the actual sounds had the first time.

Leoben's voice breaks her out of her musing, "Eat." it's short and simple and yet the words convey more than they seem. He's trying to make sure she doesn't go on a hunger strike again. She knows, somewhere, instinctively, that he's upset she killed him last night. She can't bring herself to care. She sits at her designated spot at the table, wondering why in the 12 colonies she's already started thinking of it as her spot, she's going to escape and get out of here after all.

He's tired, very tired in fact. She can see it in the way he moves, the circles around his eyes and hunch posture. She knows she shouldn't do what she's planning. But if Starbuck didn't do anything she shouldn't than she certainly wouldn't be Starbuck.

"Thank you." she keeps her voice soft, delicate, something she's managed to perfect over the years. The cylon looks at her, searching for falsehood but she's become a very good bluffer. This game has a purpose, it's to push him and see how far she can make him go until he snaps. And of course, what kind of reaction she gets. It's playing with fire, but she doesn't mind the burns.

As he turns back around she queries. "Why do you put up with me?" It's a question, perfectly legitimate to ask. A part of her is curious, to see if his silly answer has changed. And than keep on making fun of him for it if it hasn't.

"I told you Kara. I love you." The words are softly spoken, full of tenderness and affection. And for a moment she believes he could have feelings. Almost that they could really be for her. But she dismisses it, what had she ever done to warrant such feelings, she was a screw-up, she wasn't loved. Except by a few lucky strokes of love, they came in the form of Zak, her best friend Helo, the man she considered a father, at one time maybe Lee, and than Sam. But they didn't come in the form of cylons with apartments who held her people under a strict occupation.

With that sweet and quiet Kara was erased and Starbuck took her place, in all her fighting glory. "Right. Of course you do, because you know, it's perfectly normal in a relationship to lock the other up in a fancy dollhouse. So stupid of me, please tell me where this is found in the healthy relationship handbook. I must have missed it my first read-through"

"Don't do that."

"Do what? Demand references?"

"No, put yourself down. You're more than what they've made you believe, made you think. You're not any of those things at all. And I'm trying to protect you."

"I can protect myself just fine" they both know this isn't easy banter but they're pretending it is. Because she certainly doesn't want to concede him any ground, by admitting to him that maybe she can't be protected by the resistance. That maybe the Great Starbuck had to fall someday, and when she was taken was the day.

"There are things that go beyond your own or Sam's control and ability to deal with." he said simply, not getting that much annoyed in the slightest. His words are spoken carefully though, and with a start she realizes it is the first time he has acknowledged the existence of Sam and the fact she is married, or at least connected with him, out loud.

"Like what?" She can handle herself; she doesn't need a cylon guardian to watch over her. She doesn't need anyone to protect her, because she's Kara Thrace and no matter what Kara Thrace always makes it out alive. Scarred and a little broken, sure, but beaten, never, killed, never, she has been close but she'll pull through.

"There are cylons who would kill you." He answers and she rolls her green eyes and makes a snorting noise.

"Really, how interesting. I never would have guessed."

"You don't understand." Leoben turned back around and gripped the edge of the counter, trying to keep up the facade that he was calm but she had seen it break enough in Lee to see it coming. So she pressed on.

"Don't I? Everything in my life, I've been fighting the odds-"

She was abruptly cut off. "But why keep fighting them? Let someone else protect you, someone who loves you more than Sam ever can, more than Lee ever has. And trust me Kara, There are things that are only kept at bay because I am a barrier between them."

"Yeah right." She snapped, it was unwise, he was clearly trying to reign in his temper and she wasn't helping him do so. But nevertheless.

Leoben is at this point very upset, and lets the pancake on the griddle burn as he rants at her, in an unusual long stream of words. He's normally so quiet, watching, not very verbally confronting, or loud. The silent dangerous type.

"I've defended you the second the cylons figured out who the Galactican top gun was. I was ordered to kill you before you saw me on the Gemininon Traveler but I didn't. I was supposed to kill you if I saw you afterwards but I didn't. The cylons at the farm wanted to put you in the machines right away but I wouldn't let them. The cylons in the fleet wanted to kidnap you and torture you to destroy morale, or even kill you and be a figurehead on what happens to humanity. I didn't let them. I was a part of the group that convinced the cylons not to destroy you on this rock. Without me you'd be alone and forgotten in a prison cell, waiting to be torn apart at some of my more violent familys' entertainment or dead.

"So don't you dare say there are things that I don't shield you from or that I'm not needed to protect you. There are cylons who would like nothing more than to mount your head on a pole. I don't let them, do you think you could stop them if you tried? You would fail Kara. I'm the only one who stands in their way. You really think a human can protect you? You're wrong. You'd be in too far deep to overcome the odds, I'm sorry but it's the truth.

"I've let them think I was crazy, insane, all in order to protect you. Cashed in on every favor I can, traded countless more, to keep you alive and keep you breathing, even though I know you could get yourself blown away by a Raider, which I was not allowed to tinker with, any day. Even so, without me you'd be dead right now, admit it like it or not."

How dare him. _How dare he,_ _what, keep you alive? _But there was nothing she could think of that supported his claims. Nothing to disprove them either, which was something that bothered her. The cylons were evil; they were against her and had tried to kill her on many occasions. It was just another lie, him trying to frack with her head, there was no way he would go to those lengths to protected her.

She gave him another hooded scowl before dropping back to her breakfast. He had a boiling point, and now she knew how to reach it. Even if the way to get there was laying out the truth that she was worthless out infront of him.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

He should have not gone off like that. Still, some part of him couldn't help it, he had faced so much anger, ridicule, and the last person he needed to hear it from was her. _Why can't she just accept that I love her?_ His mind demanded, even though he knew it wasn't that easy.

She was sullenly eating her breakfast and he silently composed himself as he turned off the burner. He was just under a lot of stress lately, and the added pressure wasn't helping. He had simply been pushed and some steam had been let off.

Leoben had always held a small amount of pride that unlike some of the other models, he could think clearly and objectively at all times. He had a cool head on his shoulders, and it never wavered. Until he was baited by her, she brought out his very best he realized, and caused things hidden deep to creep up. His anger at being made to look ridiculous at his love for her for instance.

Sitting down at the table across from her, he took a fork and began to cut up his meal for breakfast and than maybe go back to sleep, or spend sometime awake. He simply enjoyed her presence around him, it surrounded him like a bubble, inside the bubble, some things didn't seem to matter so much anymore, it was a feeling he liked, but the second he stepped away things got complicated again.

A rumble of a bomb went off in the distance, he can see her head snap up, silent fear it was someone she cared about. He could see the war in her features, despite her prowess at triad sometimes her game face slipped and he could see her emotions. He never let her know, in fear she would pull her mask tighter around herself. Her features showed two sides warring for control, to look at the bomb, the location, anything she could see, and the other told her not to give in, not to let him know she missed the sky, the open world.

He briefly wondered if Caprica was right, and if the advice given to the Eight named Boomer about Galen Tyrol was any good. _If you love something, let it go. _He dismissed the idea, he had seen she would be his, now he had to make her realize her place was by his side. It still haunted him, she was clearly unhappy and he wanted to make her smile, but only through him. Maybe he was being selfish, but this was for her protection God-dammit. Out there, as he had eloquently said earlier, Sam couldn't protect her, not even the former Colonial Fleet in all it's glory could have stood a chance.

But he could.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

The burning in his lungs as he ran away felt good. The dam that he had been forced to work on was now set back a few days, which was sure to irritate the cylons. The blonde bitch had repeatedly told the Two in charge to get it done, something about a deadline. Pity about that.

_That's for you Kara. _He added silently in his mind. There had been no word of her, he had moved frantically among the people who had been released from the prisons asking about her, but no one had seen anything. It didn't bode well, it left him uneasy. He refused to believe she was dead, and no one else did either. She was Starbuck, and his wife was a stubborn woman. She wouldn't die so easy, and it was hard to explain. He could _feel _she was alive. Just like he could feel when to make the perfect shot, or the perfect pass, or pull the trigger at a toaster. It was almost a sixth sense, and he knew she was out there somewhere.

Now just to find her.

Pulling his jacket around himself tighter, his C Buck's jacket a memory of an old time that was long gone, he headed to the chapel. Kara had gone everyday, and he'd sometimes joined her, never as devout as she was, but he knew her faith had been very important to her. He had learned why about four months into their marriage, and accepted it without hesitation.

_Kara had just returned from the tent and he looked at her, taking in the soft morning light that circled her, her blonde hair growing long brightened against the sky from the sun, and her jacket pulled around her slim, muscular frame tightly. She had a certain peace around her after she had left the place, it was close to what he felt after being on the court._

_"Kara" he starts out tentatively, knowing one wrong move would scare her away. She senses it, and her walls come up, surrounding her like a bubble. He can rarely see what's behind them, and now even less so. _She's getting ready to bolt _his mind piped up. _

_"Yes?" She demands, almost impatiently. He gets up, and pulls her tightly against his body. At first she tries to pull away but he holds her there, hanging onto her as if he didn't she would go. She probably would. Slowly she relaxed into his embrace, accepting it. _

_"I love you." he whispers softly, and her whole body tenses. At first he'd been confused as to why she couldn't say it. Each time he had said it, she gave him a look, her green eyes unreadable, and moved along, back to what she been doing on before, as if trying to push it under the carpet. But over time he'd understood, that she simply couldn't. For whatever reason it was, she couldn't say it, and he wouldn't force her to. Kara choose to be with him, and he would let her know, everyday, how much he loved her presence. Loved her._

_"Will you tell me something?" He asks and she nods her head, looking more than a little weary. He knows this is the part he has to be careful with, one misstep and she's gone for good. "Why are you so religious?"_

_"What? Tough viper pilots can't be religious?" She tries to joke, a half-hearted smile reaching both of their lips, and she realizes she can't get out of it that easy. He can see her indecision, to trust him, not to trust him. Take a chance._

_"I was raised that way I guess. Always taught to show the proper respect," Her voice is quiet and he knows she's getting very careful in what she says. He looks back down at her, his arms still wrapped around her, though the grip is loose and she could pull away whenever she choose. He wouldn't stop her. Couldn't stop her if he tried.  
><em>

_"But why?" He pushes and she tries to pull away and he only hangs on tighter now. He wants to understand. After a few moments and muffled 'frack' she stops and looks up at him with her lids hiding most of her eyes, her bright hair a tangle around her face. Something registers in his mind that she's scared, but of what he doesn't understand. "Tell me Kara." he asks her gently, "Tell me."_

_Her hands are playing a certain spot on her fingers, the spot is being rubbed absently, she's almost not aware of it. He's noticed she does that when things get serious, or she gets nervous. He wonders where the habit came from. "Are you sure you really want to know?" she asks him softly, small, like she's five instead of twenty-five. He rubs small circles on her back, muscles tensed and coiled, he notices, in a way of answering, keep her here, with him._ Not with Apollo_ his mind silently adds but he ignores it. Whatever it was they had, it wasn't here, on this planet, with them. It was just him and her, Kara ans Sam, Sam and Kara.  
><em>

_The silence is long, but he knows she needs it. He understands her, that she needs time and space, and not to push her into telling him something when she isn't ready. He's almost ready to say they can do this another day, that they don't have to talk about it now, when she starts to speak. "Once, things weren't bad. I was little and the worst I would get was a hour or so in the closet and a smack. Nothing bad, it never happened when my Dad was home. He was a musician, traveled alot so that wasn't much. I remember my mom would always get so anxious for those days he was there. I was five when he left one day and never came back._

_"It was worse than, she got angry, she'd always drunk more than she should but now it was a constant state. I kept hoping my Dad would come back, he never did. No letters, no phone calls, it was like we didn't exist anymore. She said it was my fault, if I had never been born he never would have left. I believed her, there had never been another reason for him to leave._

_"I remember once, she got angry at me because I didn't make my bed. Cracked my head open with a broomstick handle. Said there'd be neat and order in her house. I got back at her though, She used to be in the marines and was stained on Meadra. Fracken jungles you wouldn't believe, she hated the damn bugs. So I go out and I buy a whole bunch of these plastic bugs and spread them all over her closet." She abruptedly stops and he gently has to prod her to keep going._

_"What did she do?"_

_"She screamed her fracking head off." Kara said, with no small amount of satisfaction. It all vanishes with her next words. "She stuck my hands in the door jam, and slammed the door on them. Broke all my fingers on both hands, same spot. Said I deserved it, it was my punishment for being a whore and a slut and something no one would love." She's looking at the floor and Sam isn't sure what he should do. In all his dreams and musings he had never imagined this. But somewhere, she has to know it's not her fault, that she's not damaged, and he thinks she is far from broken.  
><em>

_"I love you Kara." It's all he can think of to say, and he keeps her pulled into him, as if just by holding her he can keep the ghosts from her past from sneaking up on her. "And I can tell you right now, you're not worthless. I wouldn't even be here without you. No one would. You're the strongest person I know" She doesn't answer him, and that's okay. He knows it is something very personal, and something she hasn't told very many people. _

_"Don't tell." She begged, her voice normally so loud barely audible. _

_"I won't."  
><em>

Stepping under the scarlet tent flap, with the notes he had been receiving or the last few days in his pocket he went towards the back and stopped at one of the statues on the shelf, the dark stone from the beaches of Aquarion having caught his eye. Artemis, the Goddess of the Moon, and one of those Kara held most dearly. _A warrior_ he remembered her saying, _just like I'm supposed to be_. His finger gently touched the cold stone, again feeling like it was made ages ago, in another life, and for sure on a different world. One without the ever present fear that cylons were going to come any moment now and kill you, those you care about. When things like pyramid tournaments and how many passes you threw mattered.

"You coming?" Cally softly asks, in a way the young deck chief understands, her hands on her stomach, her birth date fast arriving. He nods mutely, and removes his fingers from the gilded statue his wife had had a special place for. He has a job to do.

Sam follows the smaller woman into the center of the tent, ducking at times to avoid the tent roof. Cally never had to worry about that, but Sam, it was almost constant. Kara'd always laugh at him if he hit his head on something. His heart pangs in sadness as each time the memory of his wife brings the reminder she isn't next to him anymore. She's somewhere in that labyrinth of a prison complex. _For now._ He silently adds, _but I'll get her out. Somehow._

People mummer their congrats on a job well done and he shrugs it off. He'd blown up bigger things in his day, and he notices the Colonel is back. He looks a little worse for the wear, but other than he's the same man. White hair, glare, straight and to the point.

"I figured they'd go for her but had no idea she'd be held this long. And before you can ask," He took a drag on the cigarette he had in his mouth "I didn't see her." Sam's heart sinks, if they had a scrap of information then they could make some kind of plan, even if it was recon, and then he remembers the note.

"I've been getting these lately. They hint at knowing where Kara is, and which fracker took her" He pulls them from his pocket and spreads the three pieces of paper over the table-top. The people are curious, and peer over each other's shoulders to look them over. Before they can get too close the Colonel snatches them from the table and looks them over himself. Some things never change, maybe that's one of them.

"_I know where Kara is. I know which model took her. He's closer to you than you think. I can help you find him._ What the frack is this? Someone's obviously pretty full of information and not feeling like sharing. Or they're pretty damn confident they won't get caught enough to play this game" He looks over the people in the room, brooding over what it could possibly mean. "How you getting these Samuel?"

"I come home and there on my table, all folded up, not footprints, no one sees anything, nothing. They've just appeared" On the inside his heart is thumping, hope that maybe the Colonel knows where these are coming from. Hoping it's a friendly source who can help him get Kara back.

"Hold it back up to the light," Jammer instructs "I see something." Tigh holds it back up to the light and they room looks at the paper looking for whatever it was the deckhand thought he had seen. "There." He points "In the corner."

In the corner is the piece of the cylon seal, made for their dealings with the joke of a president's administration, hidden in a watermark. The intimidating seal is less than half-way there, but it is enough to send the room's temperature down a few degrees. Everyone is considering the ramifications of this new information, either someone is toying with Sam or they have a friend on the inside. But questions burn through the room, is someone they know a cylon? Is someone a double agent?Why would the cylons be nice and help him?

"Hmph." the Colonel grunts, mulling over the possibilities in his mind. "Write back, ask them some general questions and see if you can find out more, met them if you can and for frack's sake bring one of us with you. But don't say anything to them, you know better. And if they do give you a location. You know better than charge in like a hot-head." Sam nods and folds the papers back in his pocket. Hope swells up again, maybe it's a step towards getting her back, towards getting the cylons off the planet.

But if that's true, why does he suddenly feel uneasy?


	16. Chapter 16

Hi everyone, I realize this chapter is shorter than most, if only because I think the scene and chapter needs to stop there. It was kind of hard for me to write this, so if you have any critque on anything I can do better, please don't hesitate to tell me. And if you have any comments I'd love to hear those too. Thanks for reading and I hope you all enjoy. **  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

Sam: _Who are you?_

Note: _Someone who hates the cylon who took Kara  
><em>

Sam: _Which cylon took her?_

Note: _Not quite ready to give that up yet_

Sam: _Why not?_

Note: _Because it's not the time._

Sam: _When is it?_

Note: _Meet me at the river dam two hours before work starts. Day before next break day._

He and Colonel Tigh stand in the tent, staring at the note that specifies tomorrow's meeting. Sam wants to go, desperate to find something that can help Kara. The older man isn't so sure, Sam can see it in the lines of his face and posture.

"I don't know Sam." Sam groans in frustration. This is the best lead for her he has ever gotten, he can't just throw it away. He knows somewhere he needs to do this rationally and he needs military expertise, but to be honest he knows even if he gets the red light he is going to do it anyway. Kara needs him, he needs her, and he can't just condemn her there.

Tigh sighs and looks him over, dark eyes glittering with some unknown, unseen thoughts. He is weighing on a choice and Sam needs the choice to be he's allowed to go. Not that he has to sneak out.

"I think it's someone messing with you." He says finally, and Sam's heart sinks.

"You'd be jumping to go if it was Ellen instead of Kara." A part of him knows that it's not the man's fault, it is probably a trap but he can't help it. He has nothing but respect for the Colonel, but Ellen is a whole other kettle of fish.

He and Kara had gotten dragged into some dinner with the Admiral, the Pegasus Commander as his mind refers to Lee, and the Tighs. As if it wasn't awkward enough with Kara and Lee trading barbs doing something only the two of them understood. Even more so as Kara left to go use the bathroom and Sam found Lee's eyes following his wife's figure. Sam, in a fit of petty revenge, could have called him on it, and was about to, when Ellen's foot was suddenly in his lap.

Quickly saying he needed the restroom too, he made his escape from Lee's not so subtle glares, Dee's innocence to the entire affair, Ellen giggling with childish glee, the Admiral and the former president impassive and the Colonel drunk.

His comment earns him a hooded glare and an unmeasureable amount of silence. "Fine." The Colonel says to him grudgingly. "But only if I go with you, got it? Second there is trouble you bolt, fast as your legs can carry you. You forget about this old man and get moving. You can lead the damn resistance." As much of as threat as it is a promise, Sam is feeling better than he has in days. Saying a quick thanks he dashes out the door, having to go again, fix and work on the stupid dam.

_I'm coming Kara. _

**Kara-**

She'd finally come up with a plan to escape this hellhole. It was nothing short of brilliant if she thought so herself, and she certainly thought so. It was unorthodox too. So many times these past three weeks she had paced back and forth, hands running over the pastel blue walls, pounding at windows and doors until her hands bleed. She couldn't think in this mind-numbing place, it was so bland and dull, on Galactica people inspired her, here it was just her, a drabby color scheme, an open window facing a garden that desperately needed more than grass and weeds to be called such, and a cylon. Who didn't really count anyways.

She had decided she was not going to refer to him by name about a week ago, she'd taken to calling him toaster instead. Along with a slew of other things. He accepted it, telling her it wasn't his name, his name was Leoben, to which she replied he was a toaster anyway. He got silent after that.

She had taken her cargo pants and put in a few things, just a photo of her and Zak in some location her mind couldn't remember, but they looked happy. His bright blue eyes had been shining and her own were looking at him, happy and alive. _That person in the picture can't be me now, she doesn't exist anymore. _She thought sadly. The war had turned them all into someone, maybe even something, else, and while she and Sam had been happy, there were still the marks of grief and pain all around them, they would never have the same happiness as she and Zak had. Maybe it was because her and Zak's love had been the first, the most innocent, and in a world that wasn't fighting each day for humanity's survival.

Other than that, she had Admiral Cain and Kendra Shaw's handy dandy pocket knife that had already come to her aide once before. After that night she had tried to kill him, but not with an obsession. She had, to put it in tech humor, bigger circuits to fry. All it was for was for ideas, he didn't keep his keys with him, they didn't even use keys, there was no number pad, if she was going to get out of her cell, Leoben was going to have to let her out.

She stood in the middle of the staircase right at the bottom, waiting for the thing to get back. They had come to an impasse, he still jabbered on about streams and other nonsense while she tuned him out and didn't pay attention to any of it. He normally got back by now, having memorized the cylon's routine. The knife was in her pocket, the cylon no doubt having searched her belongings but unable to find it in her boot's sole, ready and waiting for her plan. It was risky and dangerous as heck, but it was better than being in this cage.

The door opens and he enters the apartment, a little surprised at seeing her at the bottom of the stairs. Once she had tried rushing past him but the gate had already shut, so she normally hid in the bathroom or extra office area/library until dinner so she wouldn't have to talk to him.

"Good Evening Kara." He says in a pleasant tone of voice, moving cautiously, as though it's another plot to kill him. _Not quite. _Her mind remarks to herself sarcastically.

She takes the knife out of her pocket and puts it on her throat, pushing hard enough a bead of crimson blood stains her pale skin, and acts like nothing is wrong. She watches the color drain from the male cylon's face and almost laughs about how easy this is. "Hi Leoben."

"Kara put the knife down." His voice has an undercurrent of apprehension despite being as calm as possible and he doesn't dare move for fear it will cause her to insert the knife deeper in her throat. She can see the indecision playing over his features.

"Frack no."

"Kara come on. Please put it down." He begs and she looks as though she is deciding. She never had any plans to kill herself, oh she's thought about it before but never actually had the nerve to do anything about it. It's all part of the master plan, and she'd be damned if she stopped it now. She firmly shook her head, not moving an inch, he moves down a stair and ceases to blink. She realizes he is afraid. "Kara please." He begs her, blue eyes searching her green ones in looking for falsehood and horror at the realization there isn't any.

"I won't if you let me out." Her voice isn't as strong as she wants it to be, Kara surfacing instead of Starbuck, but it has the desired effect anyways. The cylon looks stricken, fear trying to be hidden behind his features but he's not as good of a triad player as she is.

They stand there a few more minutes, the machine working out what to do and Kara praying she doesn't falter. She knows she'll do it if she has to, they both know it's not a bluff. She doesn't want to die, not really, she can deal with anything after all, but she'll do it rather than lose this game.

"Okay than." He says sadly, resigned to her attempt. She takes the stairs up carefully and he holds the door open for her and she waits while he shuts it behind him. She promises herself it's the last time she'll see what's inside of it. She's going to be free again, provided she doesn't screw up the next few minutes. The elation, try as she might, can't quite get out of her system and she has to force herself to walk calmly as he unlocks the steel door.

"Take me out of here." She orders and he wordlessly starts down the corridor, herself staying a few steps next to him. They don't run into anyone, and she silently commits things to memory. Three steps forward, middle fork, left ,right, left, until it all gets jumbled and confusing. Designed that way she is sure. Down another set of stairs and then the same sort of pattern to get to another pair staricases.

Only this time there's a cylon standing at the top of the stairs between levels three and two. Leoben freezes as though he is turned to stone. The man infront of them, is a two copy, that she is sure, but he doesn't look like the Leoben she is familiar with at all. His eyes are jet black, same as his hair, and he has this beat up leather jacket and a smirk on his face. He's looking at her and it reminds her of guys who'd look at her in bars, not even hiding what they were thinking, even while she was on someone else's arm.

"Taking the pet for a walk Leoben?" The cylon sneers and she bristles a bit at being considered a pet. She's clearly become just an object, a pawn in their little game of wills. "I've never seen her in person before." The cylon remarks in an icy voice that grates on her nerves and takes a step forward, unafraid of the knife and grabs her cheek turning her head to see her profile. "Pretty little thing." The moist voice whispers on her ear and she pulls away, causing him to laugh.

Every nerve in her is screaming run but to where she's not sure. Her plan is collapsing around her ears and she knows it. On one hand she's got the creepy new cylon and on the other is Leoben. She tries to take a step backwards again but the more sinister version of Leoben grabs her shoulder and effortlessly takes her knife away. "Where do you think you're going doll-face?"

Leoben's chosen this moment to move forward "Jared don't you dare touch her." The threat is filled with promise and Leoben's hands are balled into fists. It makes her realize Leoben and this cylon don't get along, but the realization is cut off from farther going along by her struggles, all of which are pointless. Eventually his left hand goes around her throat making her see stars, not the good kind either. He presses her against the wall and Leoben's moving back towards them. Leoben is angry; no, he is downright furious she's never seen him like that before. "Jared, If you think I won't punish you or this then-"

She doesn't realize until the gunshot, the new cylon, Jared, has a gun. She watches horrified as Leoben's body falls the concrete ground. He's still trying to move forward, to get Jared's hands off her neck but the cylon fires again into Leoben's gut. Courses in the Academy tell her shooting someone in the stomach is one of the most painful ways to die. Leoben's breathing is labored and the cylon smiles.

"Now who is better Baby bro." His oily voice moves through the air, his voice the embodiment of all the voices of things that go bump in the night and why children run to their parents in fear. "Don't worry about downloading, I've got a nice hard-drive for you to exist on forever." Leoben's eyes go wide at whatever the implication is, "Enjoy cold storage. And just think, if I'm nice you'll only be in there forever. Or maybe I'll get bored and take you out to use you as target practice. Either way." Jared cocks his gun again. "Have a nice life." And unleashes a fury of bullets, even after Leoben is dead is corpse is still riddled with the cylon's bullets, a never ending fury.

Kara's vision has dancing black spots and her lungs cry out for air. Her limbs go weak as she tries to conserve her air. Jared doesn't care, he watches her struggle and then lets go, as she recovers and tries to move away his dark eyes watch her lazily. He looks almost bored, like she is a toy.

His arm snakes out and grabs her wrist again. "We have some ground rules to cover." He says tonelessly as she tries to pull away, all to no avail. "Junior cylons call me sir. Others call me Jared. But you, you will address me as Master. Got it slave?" Before she can complain or protest this new development the butt of the gun is coming down on her forehead and darkness swirls around her. It claims her quickly, and she realizes she is probably going to have a concussion. She also realizes things just got very bad. And then the dark takes her completely.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17-

**Sam-**

His stomach is jittery, just like it was before a game of any kind. Before they went on a raid and had been his continued state of existence for a long time. Nerves and anticipation and adrenaline pulsing through his body, keeping him on edge and thus, butterflies in his stomach. He'd thought it had been gone, the weight that people depended on you, the weight of lives pressing down on you; the answer of 'what do we do next' expected to fall from your lips. But it seemed it wasn't the case, or as Kara would say the Gods had something else in store for him. Either way, he was back to doing this, searches and rescues, blowing things up in the process. Sam sighed, the cycle of violence and disappearances never going to change. At least not for a long way off.

He walks side by side with the Colonel whose gait is uneven and limping a bit. Despite being offered a cane many times the man had also refused them, saying he wasn't that said he didn't have to go, but the man had wanted to come anyways. He knew his wife and the colonel hadn't always gotten on the best of terms. But he supposed things changed, and Kara had mentioned he had given her the idea to get married, so Sam supposed indirectly the man was responsible for his marriage. His marriage, a hard word to have swallowed at first and now it seemed so small and insignificant. The fact they were married hadn't stopped the cylons from taking her.

The dams come into sight and the uneasy feeling that had accompanied him through the planning of this venture, despite the hope and optimism, returned. He thought he felt eyes on the back of his head, and it was unnerving. Sam convinced himself no one was actually there, it was far too early for that kind of thing, or so he had been told. There certainly weren't that many people outside this morning, the air still and quiet, only the noise of the Centurions' metal clanking as they were walking around. The things give him the creeps; he still had nightmares about what had happened to Coach sometimes.

He could see Laura Roslin off in the distance, blanket wrapped around her body tightly. She raises her hand a bit and he returns the gesture. Not much can kill his mood right now. If the notes are true, with some planning and luck, he'll have his wife back in his arms at last. It's good. Saul grumbles a bit, telling him he ought to keep his head down to not get noticed and Sam reluctantly follows his word. He can't think of anything better to do to say 'frack you' to the toasters than stealing his wife out from their noses. The model, Leoben the former President had said, was his name. From what he had gotten her to talk about, this model had history with her. Sam's mind dredged up all kinds of horrors, each leaving him shaking, her beautiful body, battered and bruised, starving, dehydrated, her intelligent laughing eyes dulled with pain and misery.

Sam forces himself to put the thoughts out of his mind, it'll all be okay soon, he's coming for her. She wouldn't leave him behind and he won't leave her. It's the story of their relationship, finding each other, rescuing the other. It's who they were.

Arriving at the dams, he and the Colonel mutually agree to take a look around, hoping to find their guest with the claimed information. The air is holding it's breath, both men moving farther apart and his hand is clenching around the knife at his waist, guns ventured too dangerous if it were a trap. His boots make the only noise besides his breathing, as loud as gunshots in the still air. Just as he wondered if this was a joke and they should call out for a person he decides to give them a few more minutes to show themselves, whoever they are. They don't have to wait long.

"I'd wondered if you'd come." A voice sneaks from the shadows, sending shivers down his spine. In the shadows two Centurions red eyes glow, sweeping back and forth, guarding a figure in the middle of them. He raises a hand to protect the Colonel and is poised to pull out his knife, for all the good it will do.

"Where is she?" Sam demanded, upset at being played or if his messenger had been killed already. Either way, it didn't really matter right now. There were cylons and one of them was laughing at him.

"What makes you think I have any idea where she is?" the cylon queried, amusement draping his cold features, not the good kind of amusement either, a sick kind, one that takes amusement at suffering and pain. Before Sam can speak again the cylon decides to speak up, quenching his doubts. "Exactly where I left her. Be assured Samuel, I'm a man of my word" The figure strode into the light, a dark leather jacket covering his lanky frame, sunglasses covering his eyes from the morning light. The lips curl into amusement at the sight before him. He makes a tsk-ing sound than jerks his head. "You know what to do." he orders the centurions, who move to obey without a question.

Without a word the cylon male pivots and walks down the road and the Centurions grab Sam by his arms and shoulders, nails cutting painful gashes into his arms and letting the knife drop into the ground, handle up, the silver blade sunk into the earth. The Colonel tries to push them out of the way, to help Sam, but is knocked out cold for his efforts. Sam struggles but he knows it is pointless. He has no advantage, no way he can win. He needs to be rational here. But there's a part that can't continuing to struggle, no matter how little, against the tight steel bonds of his captors' hands.

The cylons follow their fleshy counterpart, dragging him through the streets. Laura Roslin stops in horror as she catches his eyes and nods her understanding of what he wants her to do. Warn others, change hiding places just in case, protect people; take care of them for him. People look at him with sympathy in their eyes, no one daring move in fear of what would happen to them, but he takes a bit of comfort in knowing he won't die and no one would know what had happened to him. If you don't forget people they never stop living on, even if their body is gone.

Arriving at the gates of the compound, he takes one look back at the sky; the clear fresh air fills his lungs, and peaceful quiet of morning. It may be the last time he ever sees them. Despair fills him up. How is he supposed to save her now?

* * *

><p><strong>Lee-<strong>

Lee stares in the mirror and hates the person staring back. Hates the soft, weak man there with a burning fiery passion. The weight just gets to him, and he feels like he is losing his edge. Needing a war indeed, well he had one now. It wasn't what bothered him though. It was the fact this time he had the war again, full force. The problem was he didn't think he could fight it out alone now.

It wasn't the lack of manpower, resources, though they played a rather large part. It wasn't the fact he could control things by sitting in a viper, instead of staring at screens in CIC, giving the back of his neck and ache from looking up all the time. Now he knew why his father was so irritable sometimes. But even that wasn't the problem he faced, or the lack of knowledge he had, bits and pieces of war college coming in handy every now and then. It wasn't any of those things that made him wish the soft man in the mirror would just go away, taking any trace of the man that was left, if there was a man there at all, with him.

It had been weeks since the cylons had taken New Caprica, and even his father didn't want to speak with him. Lee wondered if he was disgusted with the man he saw, the man who Lee had been thinking had just been in hiding all his life and only now got to show. Lee wasn't strong; he wasn't great, not to himself or anyone else. If he were to leave now, no one would probably notice it. And if they did they would be glad, Lee had always thought and been viewed as strong, as having everything but nothing could have been farther from the truth. Maybe this was punishment for wanting things he couldn't have.

Lee's thoughts drifted into dangerous territory, towards a blonde pilot who was probably struggling for her survival right now. _And that of her husband _ a cruel part of his mind adds, wondering a bit as well if Sam is even alive or if his illness had claimed him. A part of Lee doesn't care if Sam was dead and the rest of him is horrified. There is a bit of himself never forgiven by the rest for not waking up earlier, fighting for her sooner, not letting her run away, not taking things back and not let Gais traitor Baltar cut in their dance.

He often wondered how she was lately, missing her more than he would admit to anyone. All the little things, like when she made him mad, or upset or just wanting to hit something, were things he treasured now. His relationship with Dee, having already been on fragile ground, now even more strained under the pressure, and Lee found himself wishing he could vent his frustrations as he often had to someone else. Her refuses to think Kara, his Kara, could be dead. He gets nightmares about it, day-mares and asleep or not. Dee doesn't ask, though Lee suspects he has mentioned it in his sleep more than once.

Lee is wrapped in anger on the outside, but inside, he just wishes everything was the way it was before. She was his pilot, he was her CAG, and he had thought their relationship was more complicated back then. What he wouldn't give to go back in time to go and shake his younger self into realizing he loved her and having the nerve to tell her. His Father and Laura Roslin were the decision makers, not Gais Baltar and certainly not Lee. It was a far better place to be than right now, in his cabin, with a woman who wasn't who he wanted, most of humanity's future looking quite grime, and without the familiar presence of Kara at his side, watching out for him, making things better, as wingman should.

Sighing and sitting at his desk he flips through the drawer on the filing cabinet, it having been rather messy lately. Since he can't sleep he might as well do something useful. It's as useful as he feels anymore, his position and what he does just a figure head. Organizing things always helped clear his mind before, as a child when he couldn't sleep he would re-organize his bookshelf and things like that. It took his mind off of things, making him hone in and focus on a simple task. There was no room for what if's when chronologically organizing things.

At the bottom of the drawer, he finds, after removing lots of papers, is card Kara had made him for his birthday. Inside is a hand drawn picture of the two of them together, one he had found and put in there for safekeeping. It was Kara's work, and it was beautiful, little splashes of color with the lack of colored pencils in the fleet. His eyes, her eyes, details of the hanger bay behind them. With the card had come a bottle of ambrosia he still had, in her handwriting the note said

_Happy Birthday. You are getting so old now, seems like yesterday we just met huh? Anyways, I went to **great** lengths to get this for you. So enjoy it. Or be your usual self and save it forever._

_Kara_

It might not seem like much but he knew it had meant a lot. He spends a while looking at the picture in his hand with the card. They seem so happy in it, carefree despite all that goes on around them. He wishes he could live in that picture. Tears prick his eyes but he doesn't let them fall. He misses her, and doubts run through his mind. Because he was a coward he left her there, with cylons who would probably try and kill her or more horrible things. What if they had another farm there? Even if Kara didn't want him, he still cared about her, no matter what he did to hide it.

Footsteps emerge from his quarters and he sticks the card and drawing in a pile and goes back to what he was doing, not letting her see his face. Dee watches him with interest for a while not saying anything for period of time Lee isn't sure of. When she speaks her voice is full of concern.

"Lee, why don't you come sleep?"

"Can't." he answers short and simple. It's a simple answer to something so complicated.

Her lips are pursed. "I'm trying Lee, I really am. Tell me what I can do to make this better."

_Be his wingman, best friend, woman he really feel in love with and ultimately lost, be Kara Thrace. _But Lee doesn't say any of those things. He shrugs and keeps his eyes on the things in front of him, going at the monotonous task with precision. Dee sighs and heads on back to bed, knowing full well it was useless to argue with him.

_Kara would have argued, she would know what to do. _But for some reason Kara hadn't wanted him, and now here he was, with a ship, living his father's dream for his sham of a life, a good wife, a ship of his own, too bad he doesn't want any of it even though, even before the end of the worlds' people would have fought hard to be in his place. If he had been down on the surface it would have been someone else's choice to flee. And he wouldn't have to live with the weight of the guilt on his shoulders. And wouldn't be haunted by flashes of blonde hair in the halls, reminding him again and again what wasn't his to have. And who he may have sentenced to death by leaving her behind.

* * *

><p>So, hope you are enjoying the story so far. And I've never written Lee for this story so I wasn't quite sure how he fit in to the story and what his exact feeling were, so if you have anything to say regarding that it is most appreciated, Lee's point of view is always difficult for me. And again thanks for reading.<p> 


	18. Chapter 18

**Note: As with many Occupation fics, things get dark. And I had a hard time writing it. So warning if you many not want to read very dark stuff.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 18-<strong>

**Kara-**

When she wakes up she is confused and dizzy, the hard concrete surface under her cold skin a sharp contrast to the warm blanket given to her by Leoben or Sam's warm body heat, or even her rack on Galactica if she were really going to think back. Slowly as her mind comes into focus, she struggles and opens her eyes, something making it hard for her to do so.

_A drug? _ her mind offers and she shudders inwardly. That is last thing she needs. Looking up at the male cylon, Jared, whose clothes are ruffled and she notes with slight apprehension, he has his pants un-buttoned. It takes her another moment or so to realize they stripped her of her clothes, and stuck her in this cell with the glaring light beaming down on her from all around.

He catches her gaze, and knows what she is thinking, a grin filling his entire face. "I still wonder why Leoben hadn't played with you yet. You're fun as can be" The words sent chills down her spine and Kara mentally begins to pray. This cylon is much worse than Leoben because while Leoben had told her what he wanted, he hadn't actually taken it. This one had, thought it was hilarious in doing so as well.

"What do you want from me?" her throat feels like sand paper, and her mouth is dry, though from the implications of what happened, the drug or just a plain need of water she doesn't know. Probably all of them. The cylon smiles again and puts his jacket back on over his black shirt.

"See, unlike Leoben in regards to you, I don't have this happy pipe dream with rainbows, puppies and unicorns. That isn't to say I don't have goals. Mine is to completely and utterly destroy you." The dark eyes take on a glint and everything in her head tells her crazy.

"See you weren't there but a long time ago a not very nice man named William Adama crashed my skull in. So in return, I am going to destroy everyone he loves, bit by bit." the cylon grinned and she feels sick. "I never liked Leoben either, so destroying his fantasy girl, added bonus. See, at the end of the day, it's not the sex from you I want, or Leoben's fracked up fantasy dreams and his pathetic visions of love crushed, or the power I hold over you, no what I want is you completely destroyed. You'll hurt and you'll know it's me, and you'll beg for me to kill you, until one day you get lucky and I'm feeling generous."

Hopelessness sinks in her gut everywhere, and the cylon laughs at her expression, silent hoping that he's wrong and terror of him being right. This isn't what she bargained for in being free, not at all. There's nothing in her that she can think of that will help her escape. A bucket isn't of much use, nor the camera mounted high on the wall out of her reach, or the one way window coated with something that can probably block missiles. Her mostly brilliant mind is fuzzy, and the only weapons in this room are on the cylon.

The cylon jerks her into reality by grabbing her leg and pulling her back towards him, the bits of rock in the concrete snagging on her delicate skin. He grabs his way across her body until he gets to her neck, holding it in the palms of his hands, able to snap it quickly and efficiently if he chooses to do so.

He pulls his hand back and she quickly realizes what is coming next, years under her mother's 'care' has taught her that much. She moves just slightly to it doesn't hurt as much, and the damage is less. But unlike her mother, who normally did one punch to get her point across, only resorting to more if she really felt the need to hammer it home, the cylon dished out more. Continuous blows, again and again, all over her body until her only option left was to retreat far into herself to compartmentalize it.

She had fared worse, the only thing was, each time she went to raise her arms the tighter the pressure on her neck until it was give in or get her neck snapped. She raised her arms down the pressure went away, and she was forced to endure, completely defenseless. One blow to her head lets her sink back into blackness again, which was becoming a real friend these days.

Maybe now though, the insurgency will have a better chance of getting to her. If she is in the actual detention maybe they'll pick her up on a raid, or maybe somebody will at least know what happens to her. She doesn't fear death, but she fears being forgotten.

* * *

><p><strong>Later-<strong>

**Sam-**

Sam was trying to memorize his way through the prison complex, to which cell he was at, but it was of no use, it was a maze of all kinds of twists, tunnels and dead ends. People could wander the cell-lined halls filled with screaming, moaning or even dead inmates forever and never find a way out of the labyrinth.

The Centurions gripped his arms tightly, not giving much chance for circulation to his hands and their metal 'fingers' if that was what they called them, was cutting into his skin and would probably leave scars. It wasn't the scars he was worried about, but it had a chance of marring his marriage tattoo and that had been something Sam had loved the second Kara had asked him about it. It said they were each others, it marked her as claimed. It was the same to him as her inking 'property of Samuel Anders' and him doing the same with her own name.

The cylon in front of him still walked with an arrogant, pompous air, and it was driving Sam nuts. He had never liked people with over-inflated egos, people who could talk they could play a good game but could never actually play said game when it came down to it. He hated people like that, they irked him to end and then some. It seemed things never went wrong for people like them, while him, when things went wrong, they went wrong so spectacularly.

Stopping at a seemingly random patch of wall with a keypad on the front, the cylon male stopped and than keyed a code into the keypad, long, and took more than a minute to punch in. _High security prisoner_ his mind muttered and he smirks to himself. He's important enough to the cylons that he gets locked up fairly good, with little to no chance of escaping alive. _Who would have thought Coach?_

Shoved in the cell and pushed to his knees, he can feel the jagged concrete beneath his clothing, the layers of cloth not enough to help him be padded well against the sharp edged rock. The light glares down on him from above, leaving two corners shrouded in darkness. A pail is placed by the door, it's use obvious, nothing else.

But it isn't what captivates his attention, curled up in a ball, back to him, is Kara. He can just see the edge of her tattoo sloping down her arm, and her bright blonde hair is as dead giveaway as any. But that isn't what horrifies him, it's the bruises, scratches that seem to cover all of her unclothed body. One or two appears to be a handprint while the rest are just blobs mishing and mashing from one prupled area to the next.

Rage fills his entire being, and if weren't for the fact the cylons had left without a word he would have killed them or at least inflicted some heavy damage. This, how could anyone do this to her? Hadn't she had enough pain in her life, she didn't need more, this was just, it made him angry. He wanted to destroy the cylons piece by piece, wait for him to download and than do it all over again and again and again. They all needed to suffer for what they were putting her through; she didn't deserve any of this.

He goes over to Kara, checking that she is breathing, he notes teeth marks on her neck and rage threatens to consume everything he is again. He needs to stay calm, and be strong for her, his mind having quickly guessed what the male cylon had done to her. He knew his wife was pretty, and he knew this cylon was twisted so it was a pretty fair assumption to think. He really hoped he was wrong.

He pushes the thought away due to the bile rising in his throat. He can't deal with that, not right now. The fact she was, it makes him want to hurt things and sickens him, and Kara doesn't need to wake up and finding him in a state of extreme anger or illness. She would blame herself, and feel guilt for it, though she had no control over the situation.

Sam gently picks her up, leaning against the wall and holds her, his face buried in her hair. It smells like strawberries, and something he only identifies as Kara Thrace-Anders. _Freshly washed, what the hell _his mind inquires but Sam pushes the questions off, he'll ask her later, right now he needs to hold her, to know she is alive, despite the injuries she has, she is still breathing.

The wounds are definitely fresh, not a single bruise faded from purple and the scratches not completely scabbed over yet, and he can't help but wonder where else she must have been this last month. No one had seen hide nor hair of her, and he refuses to think she would have run from them, she was kidnapped for crying out loud. So where was she, was the question. But it was useless thinking about it now, she was out cold, and he wouldn't have any guarantees she would be talking when she woke up. Besides, he was just happy to see her again.

Kara stirred in his arms and he held on to her tighter. He'd missed this, being able to hold and touch another human who knew him intricately. After a while her eyelids fluttered and Sam leaned forward, kissing her lightly on the mouth, nearly crying in relief. She had been breathing but there was always the chance. He showered kisses on her forehead, despite being in a prison cell, he felt better knowing Kara was okay, or was at least healable.

"Kara, Kara you're alive." he whispered into her hair, still holding her close to him. He'd never thought it may make her uncomfortable, so when her hand swings out and catches him in the mouth he is in shock, is she okay?

"It's me Sam, Kara can you hear me?"

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Her brain woke up panicked. With what had apparently happened last time, playing with her head or not, it had very real effect on her, and when she felt someone kissing her and being surrounded by a person, well, of course she was going to freak out. Her brain switched from Kara waking up to Starbuck fearless warrior in less then a moment. Her hand swung on years of training, not really any choice of her own.

The voice was recognized after a second, Sam. Guilt threatened to overwhelm her, this was how she greeted one of the few people to ever love her. Leoben didn't count. Comfort took over, maybe all of this had been a bad dream, and than reality set back in. She shivered, her body cold without a stitch of clothing, despite Sam's body heat.

"I'm sorry." she whispered, touching the spot on his face gingerly, not wanting to hurt him. He was in the cell with her, just great, this was going to be horrible, she had never ever wanted him to get dragged into this.

"Shhhhhhhh," he reassured her, kissing her on the ear and her body shuddered, unable to help it. He stopped and just held her tight then, knowing what she needed, when she needed space, affection, whatever. He had always been able to read her, and never judged her either. He made her feel loved again, and there had never been a doubt on if he did or not. "It's alright, I know you didn't mean it."

She closed her eyes again, not wanting to let herself relive what had just recently happened under the influence of drugs. But they wouldn't get out of her head; she had felt the after effects of a drug like it in her system, a boy at her high school having done the same thing Jared had done to prove himself to his friends. She swallowed, suddenly wishing she could be alone so she could figure out what it all meant without Sam being there. How would he react to knowing that cylon had touched her, how could he think of touching her again?

She pulled herself from his warm arms, not wanting to but forcing herself, shivering a little as cool air hit where her skin had been connected with his. He looked a bit hurt and she felt a little bad but it was better now then later. She crawled into the other corner, one of the two in darkness, and curled up there, her body as tightly compacted as it was going to get. She could sense his hurt and confusion, but before he could push it the door opens and _it's_ back.

"Trouble in Paradise?" The cylon taunts, mockingly acting sympathetic towards the two figures on the ground. Kara can't say anything, rise to his bait, nothing. She just stays curled up in her little ball, Starbuck having deflated, drugged or not.

This annoyed the cylon to no end so he tried a different approach. "I had fun bruising her up and look forward to it again. What about you Sammy?"

If Kara had been watching the scene, she would have known Sam's fist was tightening, and he had to use what self control he processed. Only Kara was allowed to call him Sammy, he had made that clear from the get-go. It was her pet name for him, given to him ever since that one time they had first gotten aboard the Galactica. He had threatened to call her Kare-bear, joking of course but she got quiet and he had known to stop. It had been a pet name her dad would call her.

"No?" Jared asked and she sensed him behind her. _Don't move, don't move, don't move. _It had been a technique that worked with her mom, pretend she was beaten, couldn't take anymore and sometimes she would show mercy, cursing her for being so pitifully weak. He crouched to her level and Kara forced herself to remain still. She couldn't, however, stop the shudder than ran through her when she felt his palm touch her side. "Something else then?"

"Don't touch her." Sam ordered and the cylon turned and looked at him.

"And I suppose you are going to stop me? Anything in this room, anything that happens, that I don't like, she gets it. Understand?"

Sam can't do anything but back down, she realizes it somewhere, but she takes a swing at the cylon, her blow deflected easily. "Obliterating you will be fun." are his parting words, put just before a "See you tomorrow. Sleep well." and the cylon is gone again.

_Fight till we can't. Fight till we can't. Fight till we can't._ The mantra is suddenly old in her head, and she can't help but to feel the hopelessness. They are obviously in high security, with no hope of getting out really, and a cylon who was hellbent on their destruction. Suddenly dollhouses didn't seem so bad.

She took a deep breath and began. _Lords of Kobol hear my prayer._

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

He feels even more sick to his stomach, but he knows it is the last thing Kara needs right now. He needs to be there for her, for each other, because even though they're going to die and there isn't anything he can do to change that, other than go out fighting. He still has the urge to comfort her in whatever way he can, the scars having shown, old ones on her back from stories she didn't want to talk about to the new handprints.

He moves over to where she is, determined to be with someone, needing to be with someone, who loved him just as much as he loved them. He announced his presence with a scuffling noise to let her know he was there, not wanting to startle her. She didn't move, which scared him slightly, this unresponsive person unlike her.

"Kara?" he said quietly, unsure what to do with her. He moved and carefully laid his hand on her shoulder, trying not to scare her. She flinched anyways, and he ran his hand over her skin, the muscle under tense and himself upset. The ways all of this was wrong flashed through his head. _Coming in peace, absolute bull,_ he thought sourly to himself. He picked her up, not knowing if it was a good idea or not, desperate to comfort her, despite everything that faced them, anything that would calm her down or comfort her, even a little bit, was worth it.

"I don't know what happened Sam." he can hear the fear in her voice, fear he'll probably never know being a man, and just holds onto her, giving her comfort. He'll fight to the end for her. "I woke up and then he started to hurt me and you were here and-"

"You don't have to explain anything, it's okay Kara. I don't care, I love you." He kept whispering to her, clinging to the woman he loved, not wanting to face tomorrow, the ticking time bomb an effective weapon. He could hear her muttering lines of scripture, and just held on to her. And refused to let go.

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica-<strong>

She had spent all morning looking for Leoben, sorry for what had happened between them and trying to make it right, only to be unable to find him anywhere. At first she thought he had been avoiding her, as well he probably should have being how much her words had probably hurt him.

Only problem was, she couldn't find him.

She checked his apartment, but it had been locked and no one was able to get in but himself, so she supposed he could be there, but she doubted it. He would have to come out sooner or later and for a few days no one had. She knew, she had been watching it for a few days. He wasn't working, Three had come up to her the day before last in a huff demanding to know what that 'vision seeing, love-struck fool' was up to.

Something was wrong. She could feel it in her bones. She could feel it the way she loved Gaius, she knew it the way she knew about God's existence. She knew it in her soul.

"You alright Caprica?" Gaius asked, looking up from whatever he was reading on his desk to peer at her. She turned to look at him, her whole reason for arguing for peace between cylons and humanity. So they could be together, at last.

_She heard a knock on her door, and she felt out of place with her bathrobe and still wet hair hanging down her face. She had decided she was tired of moping around, if she hid in her apartment all day what did that make her? A coward? Weak? She would go out there and work for the peace that everyone deserved, not just her broken heart. She needed to move on._

_She had spent days, just locked up in her, wishing, hoping, praying things were different. She knew she had hurt Leoben, her heart hurt. She didn't want to see him get hurt as he undoubtedly would if he was insisting on his journey to love. Maybe their problem was they both loved humans. Maybe cylons and humans were not meant to be together after all. _

_Opening the door, cylon living spaces were secured after all, she comes face to face with the man she had spent so much time missing. "Gaius." She part states part questions. She motions him inside, glad she had cleaned up a bit first. She had her apartment look like her old one, something that irked some of the other cylons but Caprica didn't care, it was comforting, familiar. She still had the painting Gaius had gotten her as a present once after he found out she liked a certain artist, to impress her she liked to think. _

"_Can I come in?" he asks, nervous, and Caprica is aware that this is the part of the story where she is supposed to kick him out, tell him no, that he can't mess with her anymore, she doesn't want to be his frack-buddy. But she motions him in, her entire being thrumming on hope that had led her to this planet. _

_She remembered him yelling at her to get away from him like it had been moments ago. She sits down on her couch, not playing good hostess and asking him if he wants anything. He follows her, herself noting for the first time his hair looks it hasn't been washed in a few days, his suit slightly rumpled. He seems tired and she can't help but miss him. She hadn't realized what he meant until she was faced with being without him._

_She had wished for days that she had been human. Maybe she would have died in the blast for good or escaped with him and he wouldn't have left her alone. _

_He sits down next to her, a space between them. There is a space there she had never known with him before, the man always moving close to her, a distance never in the customs. She wraps her arm around herself and becomes aware he isn't sure what to say._

"_I've been thinking lately." He starts off slowly, "About you, thinking about you." He pauses, as though listening to someone else, the Gaius in her head regarding him from a chair while asking aloud. "Am I really that odd now in person?"_

"_I want you to know that, and I'm here to work things out with you. I said some things that many not have been the right things to say and-" he stops again, her brow furrowing in confusion before she reaches a hand out and takes his in her's. Gaius looks confused a moment before cupping her cheek with his hand and kissing her softly. "I really missed you, you know."_

"I'm just looking for someone that's all."

"Who? I'm insanely jealous." She smiled a small smile, remembering the words so long ago, not what happened after, of course not, she knew Gaius didn't normally go for Brunettes anyways. Here in Colonial One, they could be in their own little world, if only for a few moments at a time.

"A two, Leoben, hasn't been around for a few days."

"Maybe he got picked up by the insurgency?" Caprica frowned, having thought of that. They just had another Four disappear and a Three had just vanished hours ago. They had people scouring everywhere, searching for them, but no one could find them. It was as though they had vanished. She thought if Kara was getting food, but the hall had been silent, her camera catching nothing, no one moving in or out. The hall simply deserted.

"Perhaps" something felt off. She could sense it. There was something not right here. She would do more checking later, in case it all came down to being the insurgents. But she was determined to find him one way or another, he was like her little brother. Leoben was family.


	19. Chapter 19

Hey! I hope I didn't scare anyone away, and to everyone else thanks so much for sticking with me on this.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

He couldn't tell how long ago it was that the male cylon had left them alone. Hours, days, minutes? It had all blurred together in this little cell with it's never ending light overhead and nothing to pass the time. Kara had closed her eyes but Sam sensed she wasn't sleeping, knowing she needed space but his mind burned with questions. He wanted to ask them, but at the same time, he didn't want to scare her or push her into answering them because she felt obligated. Where had she been, why did it seem she had just been freshly brought here to this cell, just like him? If that was true where had she been then? His mind briefly wondered if she had betrayed him but he cursed himself for thinking it, hoping she would never know. She would not sell them out, no matter what happened. He had seen her taken away in the heavy raider for goodness sake, there was no way she had betrayed them. He felt horrible and guilty just for thinking it.

"Kara" he called out quietly, to which she stirred but did not open her eyes to look at him, her body curled up into a ball didn't shift at all. It was as though she hadn't heard him, or was deliberately not paying him any attention. He was smart enough to recognize her walls when he saw them, this was no exception.

He moved forward, again making sure she heard him as to not startle her, and placed his hand on her shoulder, hating how she automatically flinched under his touch. The cylon would pay for this, even if it was the last thing he did. Sam realized it may indeed by the last thing he ever did if the toaster made true with his promise to destroy the pair of them. But it would be worth it, even if it didn't last long for the machine and he could erase his memory.

"Talk to me Kara." He asked, more of begged really. The quiet of the cell was getting to him, the sounds of his and Kara's breathing not enough to dispel the threat of what was coming for them both. He needed a distraction, something to take his mind off what was coming, he needed to know she was alive, and with him. He didn't want to be alone, he had tried being alone over a month and a half when she was first taken away, he didn't want it again.

"What do you want Sammy?" she asked, her tone meant to come out as annoyed but ended up sounding more tired than anything. She didn't understand, she was used to silence, able to stand the quiet, she had told him stories of days when her mother would not let her talk, but he had always been around loud, cheering fans at a pyramid court, a fight on the back streets of where he grew up, he needed noise like he needed to breathe. Loud was a part of who he was, and it was a part of Starbuck too, he knew that. This silence, it felt like death.

"Just talk to me Kara. Something anything, please." he asked her again, and she opened her pretty eyes, green gold, to stare at him. His own blue felt dull in comparison, but her's were unreadable. It was odd, sometimes he knew exactly what she was thinking and could predict her actions within milliseconds but other times he had no idea what went on under that pretty blonde hair of her's. She could read him like a book though, most of the time anyways. There were times when he managed to surprise her.

She looked at him a long time, and he reached down to grasp her hands, hating the way she flinched under his touch. She shouldn't flinch, she shouldn't be afraid, she should have no reason to fear, there should be nothing wrong happening to her. It made him want to hit something, starting with her mother and moving forward. The Major who had taught her flight class, a Captain and Commander aboard the Triton, Simon, Leoben, Jared, sometimes a certain Adama made the list when Kara talked about this or that that had happened between them. He wished he could destroy them all for her, kill the demons, and make her feel safe and be safe and secure, let her know she loved her more than he had ever loved anything and would fight for everything they had.

Kara seemed to sense something in his expression and moved to pull away from him "Don't." he chokes out. He moves to wrap his arms around her, and Kara isn't fighting him, and as he leans back with her tucked inside his jacket, curled up in her little ball to hide from the camera on the ceiling what was by laws of marriage his.

"I wish this was over." she remarked after a while. It is the first sign he has that this waiting is getting to her just as much as it is getting to him. All over, for better or worse.

"Me too."

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica-<strong>

_It just didn't make sense_ she mused to herself after she shut the door behind her that led to Leoben's apartment, the place was empty. Completely empty, no Kara Thrace, no Leoben, not a single living thing. It was as though it had been abandoned. Not recently either, things had not been run in a while, she could sense it, and the laundry had not been done. Her heart panged, Leoben had liked his routine and always cleaned clothing on a Monday. Today was Wednesday.

Logically then, that meant he disappeared after the Monday before last, but before the next Monday. She had seen him herself Thursday evening so that meant Thursday evening to the following Monday was the time frame. She sighed, not a lot to work with, and Kara remained a larger problem, where had the human woman gone? She had not escaped, she knew they would catch wind from the insurgency or more high scale attacks would be planned instead of smaller raids, it was a fact about her. It was so easy to believe Leoben had been taken by insurgents, but then what had happened to Kara Thrace? She didn't just vanish, and Sam Anders would have showed some kind of physical change if she was returned to him. Instead of the almost suicidal attacks they believed he was behind.

* * *

><p>She checked the logs in the registry from the main basestar, Sam hadn't checked into work, meaning he had disappeared as well, or something happened to him. Maybe he went into hiding, but she didn't like to think that, it wasn't his style. There were too many people disappearing and she wanted to know why. They were all connected, she knew it in her gut, but how was the question, followed by why. The cylon council would never believe her if she had no proof.<p>

Caprica exited the data stream, frustrated by the more questions then answers, and the answers she got were only more questions. A nearby Two, Leoben's second in line of succession, after himself this Two would make choices for the Council, noticed her mood. His name was Landon and he was nice enough. He was a bit of a strong personality, very upfront and tended to quote scripture a great deal and adored debating, but he was likeable enough. Caprica enjoyed his company when she saw him, it was always fascinating to talk with him about this matter or another.

"You alright there Caprica?" The Two asked, blues crinkling in confusion. "You look a bit upset over there."

"Just didn't find out what I wanted, that's all." Admitting it felt worse than she thought it did, the problem had seemed not as big as it did when she admitted it aloud. In her head it seemed more manageable, out loud it felt out of control.

"Anything I can help you out with?"

"Not that I know of, it's more of a pet project than anything, have you seen Leoben lately though?"

At the mention of Leoben, Landon frowned, his happy expression turning pensive in the matter of seconds. "Can't say I have, it bothers me. I'm going to have to fill in for him tomorrow, and I despise fencing with Cavil on anything. Stupid fracker acts like he is better then the rest of us mere mortals." Caprica laughed, the main difference between Landon and Leoben being Leoben didn't like saying things that may offend people while Landon had no problem with such proclamations."You haven't seen him have you?" Landon asked her hopefully.

"No, It worries me." she confessed, her own blue eyes lost in thought.

"Well, I'll keep an eye out for you and If I see him I'll tell him you're looking for him."

She smiled and almost said 'Thanks' before she remembered this copy found that offensive, something to do with not really meaning it and should only be used in extreme cases when more than a simple 'thanks was required. She turned and went toward the hanger bay, searching for a heavy raider to take her to the surface.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

If he closed his eyes and pretended enough, he could pretend they were back in their tent and he was sitting in one of their chairs that barely deserved the name, and enjoying a nice domestic moment. He had his nose buried in her hair, the scent of his wife marred by the scent of blood, sweat and something else he cannot identify. She was breathing softly, and he thought she was asleep, shifting slightly only to look up at him with her beautiful eyes, eyes that could make him do just about anything, and didn't say anything, just held his gaze.

"If something happens to me you can't tell him anything." Of all the things she could have said, this was the one topic he would have preferred not talking about. Despite the air seeming to tick down the seconds, he didn't want to think about anything happening to her, because then he would get angry and she took it to mean he was angry at her and then she would leave him alone. And the last thing he wanted to be right now was alone and Kara upset at him. "If he says he'll stop if you tell him things don't, no names, no positions, no supplies, no locations, frequencies, codes, nothing." He nods his head, knowing he can't give up the people out there who have the insurgency as their only means of defense, and yet, he thinks he'd give up anything if it meant saving her."I mean it Sam." She reminds him, making herself comfortable by his shoulder, "No information for me."

"Yeah okay, okay." he says, still the idea of letting her get hurt while he sits on his hands is not one he likes. She is his wife, he should save her, do something. the warning that if anything goes on that the cylon doesn't like that Kara will be punished flashes through his head, and his fingers unconsciously make fists. Was there a way out where Kara wasn't getting hurt?

The door flings open unexpected, and the cylon Sam has learned to hate within seconds lounges in the door, a few Centurions behind him, a lazy grin on his face and the bright lights above reflected off his dark sunglasses. He surveyed the scene and smiled a sick grin, and the fear he won't like what is coming courses through his veins. He hangs onto his wife just a little tighter, as though it would be enough to shield her from the cylon's gaze, thoughts, blows, everything the cylon infected.

"I think we'll start with you first Sammy." The voice drawls and it's speaker handed a whip by one the Centurions. Sam fights to stay calm, he can't let them know he is afraid of the coming pain, and afraid of what will then happen to Kara. He may not like it, but if he had the option he would take her lashings for her. Because she didn't deserve this, any of this. He was the insurgent, not her, she hadn't done anything. His mind argued she had shot cylons out of the sky and destroyed a farm, but it was he who was worth more in the long run, he was the insurgent behind the attacks on Caprica, this planet, and the humanoids had a personal vendetta against him. Not her. She didn't belong here. She was only here because of what he had done. It wasn't fair, she had more than enough of a life's allotment of pain already.

The Centurions move to pull him away from her and he whispers in her ear quiet enough to not be heard by anything mechanical. "I love you Kara Anders." They grab his arms again and pull him away from Kara and to his feet, another moving behind him to bind his hands. He steels himself inside, _This is not going to be any worse than the hazing at the pyramid training camp._ he reminds himself, though there the whip was a towel, not leather. But he can pretend.

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica-<strong>

She was distracted the entire ride down to the planet, thoughts swirling around in her mind, the Simon she was riding with was not very talkative, so she didn't have to make conversation. She still had more questions than she would like, and the longer she sat and pondered the less sense they made. They were all connected but how, she was missing pieces that bound the entire puzzle together. She sighed, maybe she would talk to Gaius, he was a brilliant man, surely he could help her figure something out.

The Heavy Raider went to land but bumped onto something. Before she could ask Simon what he thought it was the Raider exploded, and she exploded with it, and plunged into the downloading stream.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20! Thank you all so much for reading and the commentators for commenting! You all support me to keep going.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam-<strong>

Strung up by his arms with Centurions taking turns to whip him, never tiring, the machines infallible. It wasn't fair, not really. They had nothing in them, nothing to understand that this was wrong. They were tools, nothing more, nothing less. His vision is only centered on what he can see, which isn't much. Life has been reduced to nothing more than the pain in his back, hurting far more than the older boy's towel stripes on his back in the high school locker room. He was fairly sure somewhere he was yelling, but he couldn't much hear. There were other screams he thought mingled with his own, female screams. _Kara? _his mind asked but there wasn't much he could do to defend the woman he loved. The thought was yanked away as he was hit again, all thoughts of what else was happening driven away. everything but the pain gone.

Managing to look over he could see the cylon personally taking out frustrations on her, her milky pale skin coloring with hit after hit. His body spins again with the force another blow and she was yanked from his view. This felt like forever, even though he knew it couldn't have been that long. It had no beginning and no end, only this, the never ending now.

When it stopped, he knew his back was flayed, every part of it aching and he could feel blood running down, and if that wasn't enough he could see it on the floor. He forces himself to search for Kara, make sure she isn't too bad. The cylon had said death was coming, and he knew it would be a long ways off. He just hoped he could make it easier for her, let him die first, maybe it would give her a chance of being rescued. He was desperate at this point, just get her out. That was what mattered. He would die for her, or risk everything to get her out. She had certainly risked enough for him. It was his turn to do the helping, the rescuing. And even if he didn't make it this time he'd go to the Gods knowing he had tried.

The cylon stopped what he was doing to regard Samuel with a practiced eye, black and glittering with a machine coldness. A human couldn't do that, machines could. That was why they needed to be gotten rid of, they had no compassion, no sense of right or wrong, they just killed, they were evil. "Make him watch." the words take a while to sink in and the cylon has already knelt to the floor next to Kara before he can fully understood.

"No." he chokes out, but the metal bullet heads' grip is tight, forcing him to watch from his place on the floor now. And he can't do anything to help his wife, can't do anything but watch. Which is the same as doing nothing in his opinion. "No, let her go." he pushes against the restraints in the form of metal fingers to no avail, causing every nerve to protest in pain. He can't help her, he is leaving her there, suffering and alone. He is failing her. He has to do something, anything to get her away from this, to save her, protect her. Because she doesn't need this, she doesn't deserve it.

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica-<strong>

The resurrection hub was empty when she arrived, or at least her section empty. She remembered her terrifying first time, the second had not been so bad but this time, this time hurt a little bit. She pulled on her clothing, not bothering to dry herself off, each outfit available having already been designed by a sister Six, and leaned against the console, trying to stop the headache from blooming. She could only wonder what Raiders felt, going out each time again and again. Did Centurions feel this when they downloaded? Did Centurions and Raiders even feel? Leoben would know, he spent time talking to them, convinced it would be the best for a day should they choose rebel. His absence from her life had only been a week or so, but she still missed him. It ached, he was one of the closest things she had to a friend instead of an admirer when she returned aboard the Basestar. He didn't praise her, or coddle her. He made Caprica feel a bit like Gaius, not in a romantic love way, more like family.

Wanting to know if they had caught the humans responsible she searched through the stream, going through the logs to check and see if anyone besides Simon and herself has been downloaded. Nothing, she checked a little farther back to just make sure, and nearly fell away from the console. The last entry had been Leoben. He hadn't completed the journey back, or at least downloaded into a new body, he was still here, but not in the download stream. He was somewhere else entirely.

_He'd been boxed._

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

She'd given up fighting a while ago, if she was to die than there was no point making it hurt more than it had to right? She was currently toning it out, trying to make it all go away for another while. Pity there wasn't something alcoholic around. She was somewhere else in her mind entirely. Memories, smells, bare hints of things that just escape her vision, a favorite tactic she used to tune out her mother and the pain she brought. Just think of something else, be somewhere else, be someone else. In her childhood it had been her brief memories of sitting next to her Father, someone finding her and taking her home with them and not being mean to her. Now she was trying something else,

_A shy young blue-eyed Cadet asking her on a date..._

_Lee Adama standing at the door with flowers..._

_Zak asking her to marry him..._

_The Old Man getting her a present for her birthday..._

_A night with Lee..._

_Sam bouncing up and down with enthusiasm with her idea..._

_A game of pick-up Pyramid ending with her and Sam going home early..._

But it doesn't work, not really, she keeps getting pulled back to this, her mind never clearly able to focus on one her life's few happy scenes. it feels the cylon is the only thing she can remember. This one, cold black eyes, laughing at her weakness, her attempts to distance herself from it. "I'll have you present for every second" he tells her coolly and that is the part she can't stand. Every hurt, every bruise, every grimace of pain on display, for anyone to see. _Specifically Sam._ What he must think of her, now that the cylon had done things to her, what she was doing to him. The cylon had explained to her he was only trying to destroy Admiral Adama's family in revenge, and breaking Sam meant breaking her. She dragged him into this, she'd killed him with her love. That made two now.

Once a long time ago as a young Academy Cadet reeling from an incident with a higher up, a Major, having taken too much of a liking to her physique, she had promised herself that she would never be helpless again. No one gave her orders, she followed her own advice, no one hurt her, if they did she got even, no one did anything to Kara Thrace that she didn't consent to. It wasn't allowed to happen again, because than she felt like five years old, her father having just left and her mother on warpath. She had promised herself no one would have that control over her again.

But with all her weakness on display, laid out for anyone to see. It wasn't what she wanted, she felt stabbing pains all over, her wrists felt bruised, badly, and she didn't have a part of her that didn't want to die. Maybe Zak would be there, maybe she would get to go somewhere not so bad.

She was jerked down to the present when the cylon showed her a knife. Not just any knife, Admiral Cain's pocketknife, the one Kendra'd had and Kara'd gotten from Lee's first Ex-O. He'd gotten it somehow, and the eyes bubbled with mirth at her. "Seems to me you last longer than your Pyramid boy does." Sam blinks across the room, not understanding and she sees the damage done to him, it's far worse than her own. His skin likes flayed and his breathing is ragged. "Maybe we ought to put him out of his misery."

"No." she begs, but the longer they hold on the more of a chance they have, and she doesn't wait to be alone. That is the only reason she has said no, she doesn't think she can take dying alone, forgotten in this cell. She has known, known for a long time, that she would die one day, but she just didn't want to be forgotten. So many times she had been forgotten, maybe there would be the chance Sam would make it out, after all, he wasn't who the cylon wanted.

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica-<strong>

The blonde cylon paced back and forth, anxious as the downloading process neared its completion. Actually downloading took about an hour or so, it was the getting back to the actual data stream over a distance that was the time taker. The closer you were to the facilitates, the faster the download and the less it hurt. It held true the other way, the farther away the longer it took, and the less likely chance you would make it back in one piece. After all, a ship had died that way. When the humans destroyed the resurrection ship and some other the base stars, another ship had been put just in range for it to work. Much to many's' horror, only some of the cylons came back, and then except for about ten cylons they were only in parts. Not all their higher functions worked or they had gaps, those who came in before the ship was in full range for the full process, were right again and after a short discussion, mercy was shown and their souls were given to God. It was the first time the cylons had ever conducted what the hum,ans might call funeral service.

Now was the hard part. Caprica knelt to her brothers side as his body began to shake and tremble as he was downloaded into it. Some were silent, others cried. Leoben was often silent, but now he cried. Her name, over and over, a sense of urgency that only led more of her suspicions to go up. Something had happened to the viper pilot, she knew it now. She gently took his hand, careful not to let him thrash too much, least he hurt himself, and gently smoothed back his hair. She had no idea what had transpired, though she would soon, and could only wait.

The wait was the agonizing hard part.

Soft gentle words didn't seem to comfort him, nor did the reassurances that Kara would be table to take care of herself. So she stopped speaking altogether, only stroking his damp forehead and wincing a bit when his death grip on her hand got too tight or cut off her circulation.

Finally he gasped to the surface, taking stock of where he was, blue eyes that looked like her own, flickered around the room. "Leoben I'm so sorry for what I said and did." she confesses, but he doesn't seem to be paying her much attention, by which she is hurt. He had always been passive aggressive, but she preferred open conflict to go up against. "Leoben, I really mean it, I'm sorry."

He didn't care about her apologies, she thought crest-fallen. He just grabbed clothes from their slot next to the tank, cursing when he couldn't find his pants, and ignored her completely, the sense of urgency filling his every movement. "Leoben, what's wrong?" she queries, giving up on getting him to forgive her. Maybe it would happen in time, like it had with Gaius.

"Stay here. When Jared comes through to download restrain him, no ins or outs, complete isolation. He boxed me, and he has Kara." she can hardly recognize her brother, the quiet peaceful man giving orders like, like a soldier, but she nods without question, knowing the implications of what he had just said. It had never happened before in their history, ever. What it means is unknown, it has simply never happened before.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Her plea is unheard, and the cylon stalks closer to the other side of the room, knife in hand, black eyes firmly fixed on Sam's body, which is completely still except for a slight rising and falling of his chest. Kara desperately tries to force her aching body to move, and her progress is slower, much too slow. She is moving but not at the rate the cylon is. He seems to be slowing down too, pausing next to Sam's form, enjoying watching her struggle to make it to the former pyramid player's side.

She can't let him down, she won't let herself. She may have screwed up big time before, hell she had screwed up big time before, but she wouldn't let herself do it again. Sam needed to make this, he needed to be okay, they needed to make it out, they couldn't die here, alone and forgotten, with no one knowing what happened to them. _One of her biggest fears was being forgotten. _He deserved to die an old man with family around him, just another thing she wouldn't been able to give him.

Finally arriving at Sam's side, and the cylons feet, her breath is labored, gasping and her body is on fire. Everything hurts, and she can't help but wish it would stop. _Stopping is for weak people Kara_ Her mother's voice rings around her head _You just going to sit there and cry about it? _Maybe that was the entire reason Socrata and her hurtful punches and words had been put in her life for so long, to prepare her for this moment, so when the time came she'd be ready to do what she needed to do for survival, at least for a bit longer.

She reached out and grabbed the cylon's legs, swiping them out from under him. With a yelled curse, the cylon fell backwards and Kara was on top of him, hitting and punching even though she was not inflicting anything permanent considering how weak she was from the injuries her body had. that was not to say she gave it everything she had, and managed to break the cylon's nose, causing even more blood to hit the floor before the cylon got back to being in charge again.

Slamming her roughly into the ground, Sam forgotten, the cylon held her in place by her neck. Blood dripped into her face from where the cylon leaned above her, "You'll pay for that bitch."

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

_Faster Faster Faster._ Her mind urges him on, his lungs crying for oxygen but himself not stopping to give them any. Yes he just downloaded back but he only has one concern right now, and it's not himself. Moving through the prisons, the prisons he designed, he continues onwards, frustrated, slamming his hands into any data port hoping to find something. He doesn't expect Jared to be that stupid though, and he is right. Furious, he runs smack into a few Centurions, and what they have to tell him is his the answers he is looking for and his fears confirmed.

Making them come along, being Jared's senior they answer to him over Jared after all, and picking up any other cylon, humanoid or metal. He sends Boomer off to get medical involved and bring a Simon and something to transport her in down, having a feeling they'll need it with a nasty feeling in his gut. He followed the Centurions down the high security hall-ways, moving through them as fast as he could force himself to go. Arriving at the door he keyed it open, the door taking forever to hiss open, the smell of blood hitting his nostrils almost instantly. "Secure the Two" he barked, almost feeling like a soldier, while his eyes take in the horrible scene before him.

Samuel Anders, doesn't look good. Kara doesn't look much better, Jared poised above her, the cold black eyes turning to face Leoben. A smile lights up his face as the cylon moves to an upright, standing, position, bringing Kara with him, hands still wrapped firmly around her neck. Kara's blinking into sleep, her body shutting down trying to conserve the precious little oxygen it is receiving. She's dropped to the floor where she doesn't wake and Leoben begins to fear the worst. "Now here's your predicament Lover-boy." Jared taunts, words scraping across her brain. "Either Kara dies or Sammy does, but either way I'm not going out without a death." The black eyes are crazy, and Leoben knows he's lost it. "Don't think about shooting me." Jared said, seeming to read his mind. "I have time to snap your pretty little girlfriend's neck before I go."

* * *

><p>So that concludes Chapter 20. Again thanks to everyone for reading along.<p> 


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21-**

**Leoben-**

He's caught in a trap, the worst of kinds. If he chooses to attack, Kara dies, but if chooses to wait on attacking and let the crazed machine kill someone, someone died either way. "Go ahead, Make your choice" the copy of himself, his own features twisted into something Leoben can't decipher sneer at him and his hesitation.

He can see what is on the cylons features, and it scares him that one of his, one of his twos, as much as Jared is an oddball, Leoben has never seen him this way, never wanted to see anything this way. Revenge he would understand, but this, it's cruelty, it's anger and it's twisted malice Leoben has never before seen from one of his own_, _something only seen in stories the humans tell about one another._ 'You are truly no greater than we are' _Kara's own words, from so long ago, ring in his head and Leoben knows, maybe they started out machines but they have taken on humanity, the good, the bad, and the ugly.

"Don't hurt them, Jared we can work this all out. Useless deaths won't solve anything." He tries to negotiate, another cylon runs off for more medical equipment and he sees the first stretcher he'd told to find them in the building arrive, everything is paused, all eyes on the cylon crouched next to the two humans, brandishing a pocketknife ages old. No one dared to move, in fear one slight misstep would set the cylon off.

"Make me feel better." The cylon mummers.

"No it won't, it's not Kara or Sam you hate, it's Admiral Adama you hate." At his words the cylon pulls more resolve to kill around him, the words bringing an element of danger to the room. _Damn Adama men. _Leoben thought bitterly. He knows something bad is about to happen, he can feel it with everything he is. This is a place where the stream parts, two different destinies, two different roads.

"Their deaths hurt him, tear him to pieces and kill him," the cylon explained and waited for Leoben's answer on who to condemn, shifting the pocket knife to Kara's lovely throat, her skin pale and sweaty, her unconscious body trembling as it breathed. Beads of blood appear at the knife's point and Leoben knows he can't do this. He can't let her die, Losing Sam would kill her, but he can't lose Kara. He can't let her go. She means everything to him. He's nothing without her.

"Don't kill her. No matter what you do, don't kill her" Leoben orders, the voice that had been voicing his wants held no fear, and he was pleased in some part of his mind it didn't tremble. Black eyes met blue and made a choice. A choice was made, though Leoben wished it hadn't. Blood for blood, one life for another, an ever repeating story, the players changing but the story, this part the same. The moment before everything shattered.

"Okay. I'll kill Sam instead, just like you wanted" Jared said calm, as though they had just discussed the weather. He monitions for the Centurions to take him out, but Jared is too fast. Leoben knows inside the path the stream has taken, and he knows what happens next. Quick as wink, Jared is only holding the handle of the knife, the rest of the knife buried deep inside Samuel Anders.

Shoots go off, and Leoben is forced to watch blue eyes look up at him. They blamed him, it was all his fault, with his choice he had set off a chain of events that would shape the universe forever, again, just like the last cycle. Moving on instinct he gets the rest of the cylons to help him, and get Sam to Simon as fast as possible. He promises the dying man Kara will be okay, and not even waiting for the second stretcher to arrive, Leoben lifts her fragile body into his arms, taking a blanket that has come out of nowhere to cover her from prying eyes.

Everything is truly a blur, Leoben doesn't remember where his feet are taking him, what way they took him out of the cells but it's fast, the only thing that mattered was the lives of two people in the balance, His concern for Kara is first, her husband second. He knows it is useless, this hope that the story will change this time, spare them the pain.

At medical, a six dedicated to helping Simon took Kara from his arms and placed her on the bed nearby, moving to work instantly. Samuel is rushed into the operating room, and Multiple Simons appear, moving to try to work their art into saving the man's life.

* * *

><p>Hours pass, and he just sits on an uncomfortable chair, numb on the inside and out. The government has been by, but they agreed to incarcerate Jared until he could tell them what happened. He hears Kara should be waking up soon, and the scope of her injures was greater than it appeared. Internal bleeding, broken bones, oxygen deprivation, traces of drugs in her system, add in the mess of bruises and wounds she had, medical decided to keep her as isolated from the world as possible. Not a care unit, but just shut off without visitors.<p>

Its Samuel he has no news of, and he prays at least for Kara's sake he is okay. He feels the man hovering on the edge of the stream, and Leoben wills him back. He's decided to make every kind of bargain he can, to save this man, he made Kara happy. He'd let Kara go, watch her from afar like he used to, make sure they were safe. If only for her sake did he hope this man was okay so be it. If it meant losing Kara than he would take it, she didn't need this pain, she'd had enough grief and agony.

_Come on Samuel _the cylon urged with his mind as he felt the man near the edge of the stream again. _Hang in there. _But the man is slipping, farther and farther away, and it seems the harder Leoben prays for him to come back, come back for Kara, farther the man drifts out of the stream until he's gone altogether. Just like he had the last cycle. A minute later a nurse exits and tells him what he already knows.

Samuel didn't make it.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Her mind is blank, as flat and lifeless as she feels. She knows where she is, been there before in fact, it's gray and blank. She remembered it as a kid, not so much as an adult. After a beating sometimes it would come when she had been hurt badly, numb from the pain, numb from the world. She existed and yet she didn't. It was calm here, she was safe, nothing could get here right here, where she was alone. There was something hovering on the edge of her mind but she refused to remember it right now.

It was going to bring pain with it. She didn't think she could stand it, _just let me be for a little while longer_.

But it refused to be ignored, and as she clung to the edges of her make believe world, where nothing hurt and no monsters existed, fell away, memories came rushing back in. A cell, the smell of blood, blacking out, Sam dying.

Sam. The name burns itself in her mind, she killed another man. Didn't she? She can't remember anything anymore. The images confuse her, a knife, the knife Kendra Shaw had gotten from Admiral Cain, over Sam's body. A door banging open, hands around her neck, things going black, and then it stops. Nothing else is there.

She opened her eyes and knows right away she's in a hospital. It's not Galactica, she can't hear the ships familiar hum. It's nowhere she recognizes, which she knows should worry her. Taking in the sights she sucks in a breath as a Six, sitting in a chair meant for visitors pensively stares out the window, not noticing she's awake.

"Can we wait on round two; don't feel up to it right about now. How about two weeks from now? Should be enough time to sell tickets." Starbuck, from her long locked away place in Kara's mind pipes up and the Six turns to look at her. She's different from the others, Kara can see that, but she doesn't much care. The synthetic woman eyes widen at the malice in her words and than are replaced by something Kara can't understand at first until she looks a little closer. It only makes her angry, who is this cylon to pity her? How can they do that, break her world into pieces then claim they feel sorry for her anguish at what they did?

"I'm sorry Leoben isn't here, He has to be somewhere else, he asked me to stay with you, I'm Caprica." The audacity of the cylons makes her want to puke. Did they have a Tauron among them, how about Aquaria? Picon? Did they name themselves after colonies like a calling card? Another sick game cylons played? They probably took trophies, pieces of ruble from important buildings, a kid's sunglasses. It wouldn't surprise her.

"So I guess you must be the bitch that blew up my planet if you're called Caprica." Starbuck is in full form, Kara pushed to the back, hurts and wounds can wait, she can't let them know how worried she is about Sam. they'll use it against her, lie to her. The woman flushes, though from shame or modesty, Kara can't tell. Doesn't care either.

"I'm here as Leoben's friend." the cylon begins and Kara's curious in spite of herself, when did he renter the picture. She figured he must have downloaded and been stored somewhere, never to be seen from again. "He can't be available right this exact second but I'll go get him."

"I don't want to see him."

The female imitation paused than turned back around, "Then who do you want to see?" she seemed genuinely confused at the question. It was as though she didn't know that Kara would have no wish to see her captor, the one who locked her up in a dollhouse all that time, away from her people, Sam, her friends.

"Sam." Kara begrudged her and hates it when sympathy clouds over the bright blue eyes of the cylon. _No no she's wrong _her mind argues._  
><em>

"I'm probably not the right person for this, but" The cylon broke off, looking at something off in the distance, her head tilted as though listening to someone before continuing onwards with what she was saying. "He died, several days ago, when we brought him in, we did everything we could but-"

"Get out." the words are calm, but small. The cylon stops before trying to continue and Kara can't take it anymore. "GET OUT!" the words are ripped from her throat, making everything in her hurt but it's not true. They're lying to her again, nothing they say can be trusted. They are twisted, manipulative motherfrackers who got off on her pain, this is just another trick, another lie. It has to be.

The cylon looks like she wants to say something but thinks better of it, and calmly walks out the door to her room. The lock clicks and it's so much like Caprica all over again she has to fight down panic. But somewhere in her, she knows Sam couldn't have survived that abuse. She thinks she would feel it, feel he was alive like she had last time, no such comfort is there this time. Tears run down her face and sobs shake her body, as she mourned another man whose love killed him.

_He died because of me. _

* * *

><p>They bury him a few days later. Leoben has somehow gotten a coffin, and he had Centurions dig a grave. Still, not well enough to stand and because of the cylons insistence she not over exert herself, they've made her use a wheelchair, making her feel farther invalid. It's a very simple affair, just the two of them, in a place on the other side of the planet, surrounded by trees in a grove, with a headstone made of metal, 'so it won't wear away easily' or whatever Leoben said. She doesn't listen anymore.<p>

She may have married Sam to get away from Lee, but she still loved Sam all the same. It wasn't like it was with Lee, but it was just as special in it's own way. His calm blue eyes, never asking for more than she could give, with quiet ways of showing affection, playing pyramid and suspecting he let her win more often than not. Accepting what she had to give him without regrets or demands for more.

Pulling herself from the chair, under Leoben's watchful, silent gaze, she knelt on the ground, ignoring the twinges of pain the movement brought. They'd moved her back to the apartment from hell yesterday, only difference being it was Leoben who slept on the couch this time. Too tired to argue she hadn't pitched a fit. She simply didn't care anymore. Everything had been taken from her, her small hopes that had begun to bloom, maybe she wasn't a screw up, maybe this man really did love her, maybe they could have a family. It was all torn to shreds, especially with Simon's news that she had miscarried, having assumed she had known she was pregnant with Sam's child. _Not anymore. _Just another thing of him, taken away. _What did I do to deserve this Lords?_

She thinks she knows, not escaping from the cylon earlier, not fighting until she couldn't, for giving up, for being weak. _Girls like you never get happy ever afters anyways Kara. Always remember that. _Her mother's voice booms around her head, and again, Kara is forced to concede she is right.

Leoben had shown up by her bedside in the hospital room with a few pictures of him, which now resided in her pocket. His own blue eyes held a measure of grief, though Kara can't imagine why, he didn't kill Sam. Tears fall again, as she presses her hands into the dirt of Sam's grave, _he was really gone. _He had taken almost everything of her with him, and she wanted to join him more often than not. Maybe than things wouldn't hurt so much.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

Standing in front of the cylon high council was hard. It was hard enough dealing with them while on the council itself, let alone standing before it, Landon in his place, the man's almost-permanently amused expression now sobered with the situation.

Cavil looks none-too-pleased and though Jared is his favorite Two, his one ally among them, he can't deny the law that says a cylon who boxes another with the express vote is boxed themselves. It's just what Leoben wants to do to the drive the convicted cylon is on, that Cavil has an issue with.

"You want to destroy it. Go at like an ape over a banana still with its skin on it?" his disdain for this idea, destroying the drive he is on, is simply mocked openly by the One and Leoben must fight to keep his cool. He knows this has no precedent, but he knows for Kara's sake he has to do it; he thinks he is going to go crazy if he doesn't. He needs to get some kind of revenge for her, every time he looks at her sad, lifeless green eyes he wants to kill his brother two more and more, permanently seems like a good idea. This way he can never be around again, there will never be another.

Kara had been waking up in the middle of the night, screaming and crying, terrorized he was after her again. Gentling soothing her as she clung to him while her entire being shook, he reassured her he would let nothing happen to her. She'd called him Sam multiple times throughout the entire thing, and hadn't seemed to know who he actually was. It stung, but Leoben decided to accept it. He wanted to be able to reassure her Jared could never go after her again, after all, someone could be unboxed. But their information lost beyond the downloading range, impossible to recover. It seemed an ideal solution.

"Jared was, to put it simply, going off the deep end. He became what he despised, a cruel sadistic human-like cylon. If we accept that humanity is flawed, then imitating them and their manners that only some of the most barbaric humans do, what does that say about him? Humans that way generally have a medical illness of the mind, but he choose to take on that path, he choose to take that role in the stream, and for his actions he must be punished, completely erased. Gone."

The cylons mummer at the truth in his words, none of them liked Jared. Three smiles like a cat with a canary, always the devil's advocate, "You sure this isn't for personal reasons?"

"It is personal." Leoben argued, having seen this question coming. "Which is why it matters so much, if we let him loose he'll do it again, it destroys what we are, an insidious root, a corrupting virus. If he turned that way, how many others will follow before we destroy ourselves completely? If we kill the root now, we show, both human and cylon, that kind of behavior, is not tolerated on both sides."

D'Anna smiles and he knows he has won her over, just the Ones now. Black eyes glitter at him, full of arrogance and pompousness. "So, you're voting we stop all punishments against those who commit a crime because you find it inhumane? That's a bright idea there." the words sneer at him, and Leoben is gripping his chair with white knuckles, resisting the urge to scream that it was needed. Only Jared could reduce him to this.

"With all respect Cavil, there is a difference between roughing someone up because they did something wrong and raping a woman who didn't do anything besides exist." Why can't Cavil see that Jared needs to be killed, its better for all of them, and he can say he was right now.

Something shifts in the elder cylons face, and Leoben can't see what it is, but it is enough. "Alright fine, box him than destroy the drive." The vote is called, all in Leoben's favor and the heavy raider is prepped with the cylon in the drive on board, along with Leoben himself.

He plots in the data coordinates, jumping to full capacity, again and again and again until for sure out of range. Soon he stops than goes to the back, lifting up a hammer, revenge may not do anything for Kara, or her condition, or Samuel's death, but this feels good right now. It is a step in the right direction.

* * *

><p>Again, thanks to all my reviewers and readers, and I hope you liked this chapter.<p> 


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22-**

**Leoben-**

Kara hadn't been any better in the two days since she came home from under his brother Simon's care in the medical ward. He doesn't know what to do, and he can't seem to be able to do anything but watch helplessly from the sidelines. She is so lost, so broken and hurt. He wants to go back in time and fix this, and he, for what must be the thousandth time, curses this part of the story for making her hurt this way. Just because all of this has happened before and all of this will happen again doesn't mean it should.

Leoben is awakened in the middle of the night from his bed on the couch at the heart-wrenching sobs coming from the apartment's bedroom. He moves on automatic, his tired body responding to the pleas for help. He only moves faster as they intensify in volume.

Moving carefully to shake her awake and not get swung at in the process, he learned that lesson yesterday with a bloody nose, he gently shakes her limp form into alertness, providing the escape from the nightmares that plagued her sleeping hours.

"Lee." She called, her arms quickly snaking around his torso into a hug. Kara is hanging onto him now like he would disappear if she didn't. She sobbed the Pegasus Commander's name into his shoulder again and again and he just reassured her in whatever way he could, keeping her distraught body close to his. It hurt more than Leoben could ever say, she didn't want him, she wanted Lee, who didn't even deserve her love or affection from what he had been shown in visions, yesterday it had been Zak and before that Sam.

But that wasn't his concern right now. He would have time to agonize over that later. His only concern right now was calming her down and making things better for her. If it meant he was Lee today so be it. He'd pretend for her. "Shh I got you Kara, you're safe now. Nothing is going to hurt you."

"I'm sorry Lee." Kara apologizes for some rift between them, for what Leoben didn't know exactly. Leoben just rocks her back and forth, trying his best to comfort her, his hand rubbing circles on her back, doing whatever he can to help the tense muscles relax so she can sleep again.

If Jared had not already been gotten rid of, Leoben would have surely gotten rid of him in some horribly painful other way by now. It tore him up to see Kara, his strong and beautiful and unshakable Kara, acting this way. He remembered when he had first seen her, she had taken his breath away, strong, willful, unwilling to compromise on anything but her way. There was no trace of Starbuck or Kara Thrace in the sobbing woman in his arms, pleading for forgiveness.

"There is nothing to apologize for Kara, I love you more then anything, you know that." He feels bad about the deceptions but she doesn't seem to remember the times when he comes to comfort her in the night. At his words she only nuzzles closer to him, her head coming to rest where his neck met his shoulder, seeking out warmth and protection from whatever demons may be following her around. He sets her to lay back down on the bed and lays behind her, wrapping her up in his embrace, letting her drift into sleep.

He knows he should move once her breathing has evened out but he doesn't want to. _Just stay a little longer _his mind pleads with him desperately and he does. It's the clean smell of her hair, the feel of her soft skin next to his, their forms fitting together better then jigsaw pieces. He revels in the perfection of them together, where they belonged, where they were made for each other. She shifts slightly her head resting on him as she slept. He doesn't want to leave her.

But he knows if they wake up this way she will assume the worst. He can't ever let that happen, let her think he would ever use her, hurt her, violate her and damage her the way Jared did. He'd die before doing that to her, he'd never let anyone do that to her for as long as he drew breath.

But he had. Guilt overwhelmed his entire soul, Jared had taken her, on his watch, and it had almost seemed too easy, like the cylon had just seen what was going on and seized the opportunity. If he had done something else Samuel would still be alive. If he had done something else Kara wouldn't be so broken from her ordeal, she never would have been violated, tortured and had her husband stolen away. _Not that the fact Samuel is gone is that is much of a problem to you now is it? _Jared's voice, one that Leoben knows will never fully leave him, calls out from the back of his mind, intensifying the guilt he felt.

With regret and a longing to stay he lifts himself from the bed and looks back down at her sleeping form. Not even in sleep is she fully at ease, he can see her muscles tense and the sleep she is receiving is not good sleep. It may not be a dream-filled now but it is still not good. But it will have to do, like so many other things he cannot seem to be able to give her the best.

He tucks the covers back up to keep her warm and smooths the hair from her face and impulsively kisses her softly on the forehead, the contact between them electric for the second it lasted. Leoben indulges himself one last long look before he shuts the door behind him and returns to the couch where he is plagued by his own nightmares where Jared laughs, and Kara's eyes fully close forever. He hopes Kara sleeps better then he does.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

The days have passed by so slowly for her. She feels numb. Like she can't feel anything new happen to her, only remember the past, the images pass in front of her eyelids whether she wants them to or not, but she doesn't feel. She supposes it is a good thing, not feeling, but she has learned that even anger and agony are better than misery. This existence is just a nothing; she oddly enough wants the pain. If it only means she feels something.

'_Pain is good, it means you're alive.' _Socrata Thrace's word echo around her head, and Kara briefly wonders if some other kind of pain would suffice. But she looks at her bandaged hands, feels the wrapping around her ribs, fingers the stitches on her cuts and messes with the strap on the wrist brace. They may be letting her walk again but she is far from okay. They would just pump her full of more pain meds anyways. Simon has already told her he is doing what he can to minimize scarring but she doesn't care.

She wonders if she'll ever care about anything again. Everything has been taken from her, she can't win, why fight?

'_We fought 'till we couldn't on that damned moon named Meadra, fought' till men died and the insects ate them, don't you dare give up on me now you little brat' _Words that were said after she had thought death was preferable to her mother's rage, meant to punish once now offered a glimmer of hope to the adult.

Oddly out of all the ghosts that follow her in this apartment, her mother's is the strongest, but it no longer is it the painful whip it had once been, instead it spends its time convincing her to keep going. '_Don't be weak Kara, you need to be a warrior like me, you're different, you have a special destiny that surpasses anyone else's' _Maybe that was why she was put under her mother's care. Or maybe she is trying to make things up to make herself feel better. Poor broken Kara trying to rationalize things away so she doesn't have to face them huh? Yeah well, what else was new?

Leoben walks on glass around her these days, not saying much, asking her if he can help with anything or if she is in pain every now and then. She always shakes her head in refusal, but he helps her anyways, seeming to know in that uncanny way of his she is lying to him about it. She doesn't comment on where he has been and he doesn't offer an explanation for how he showed up beside her bed after her meeting with Caprica with a worried expression on his face.

She wakes up exhausted, her dreams strange, being rescued from Jared by Lee only to wake up and find she is still under cylon control. All the cylons were all the same, just mirror copies of each other. Somewhere she knows Boomer and Helo's copy are different, so why couldn't Leoben and Jared be different but that is something she simply cannot accept right now. Maybe not ever. They're all the enemy, just in different degrees and forms with different methods to break you.

Exiting the room, another thing she found odd. He had simply given her the bed, no questions asked, and moved his alarm clock out to the living room and slept on the couch, where she had used to spend her nights. No complaining or commenting on it, no real reason. It had just happened.

Leoben was making eggs, scrambling them and adding cheese. _Like the way Zak used too. _She doesn't bother questioning how he knows this way is her favorite, takes too long and hurts too much to remember back to Zak. When he sets the plate before her with bacon along with a piece of toast on the side, she mindlessly reaches for it, her brain on automatic, a machine herself in a way these days.

Leoben settles on the other side and as always prays before he begins his meal. He doesn't pray out loud anymore she's noticed. She doesn't much care about that either it's just another thing she can't bring herself to pay attention to. She eats some of her food, pick the food up with her fork, put in her mouth, chew it, swallow it, and repeat it. Again and again until her food is all gone.

Kara stifled back a yawn and observes for the first time that Leoben looks just as tired as she does. What he has to be tired about she doesn't know either, he just spends most of his day here with her, not working anymore but being here with her, his presence unable to escape, and when he did leave it wasn't for long. No more than twenty minutes at the most. She feels as though he has eyes watching her, even then, she can never escape the feel of his gaze. Afraid for something she might do, afraid of her taking what might be her only way out.

"Kara." His voice is quiet and she looks up. "If you are having problems sleeping then we can talk to Simon about getting you something to help you sleep better at night."

"No." She isn't sure why she is refusing, maybe it is because of a fear of what will happen if she blacks out. A fear of drugs of any kind after what Jared claimed he had done under their influence might be the cause. Leoben seems to notice and his expression softens and she hates it. Hates that no matter what she can't get away, hates that the cylons keep taking things from her, hates that it has to be her they take things from.

"Okay. But if you ever want them just ask and we can get them for you." It's moments like this she knows she is fracked. The cylon is being nice to her. Kara has felt a small amount of kindness in her life, but not from her enemies before. The idea that one of her enemies, could be so kind to her, loving and caring towards her made her feel sick to her stomach in so many ways.

Pushing herself violently away from the table Leoben looks up in concern. His blue eyes study her face for what she is up to, trying to make sense of her. "Kara you need to eat more than that. You need to gain your strength back."

"Why do you love me?" It's not even what she had been going to say, the sarcastic retort her brain had come up with dying on her lips, the question itself just tumbled out, from some dark place in her mind. She really wants to know, what makes this machine so determined to have her love him too, he should know by now that her love killed men.

"What is there not to love Kara?" He asks instead and before she can answer the obvious 'everything' he is standing by her side, close enough to reach out and touch and yet far enough away it is not uncomfortable to the point she needs to flee. "I love the way you are, dedicated, determined, smart, the way you don't let anything stop you. You are more creative then anyone I know and you have a sprit, a will that is impossible not to admire. You're beautiful, strong, intelligent stubborn and a gifted pilot. What is there to not love?"

Before she can answer his crazy speech he has picked up her plate and is going back to get her more food. "Sit down Kara, and eat some more. You need strength." And so she gives in to the insanity. There isn't anything to fight for anymore. Not her home, her family, her dignity and pride. Those things were all striped away from her. All she has is reminders of what used to be those things, and that has to do.

Because girls like her just don't get happily ever afters. Maybe being here with a deranged cylon is her punishment for daring to think things could ever be different. It's her destiny, her fate to suffer, she learned that lesson long long ago.

* * *

><p><strong>Laura- <strong>

Just recently taken out of her cell where she had been held for Gods knew how long, the former President turned school teacher could only follow the blonde cylon, the Six keeping a slow pace so Laura could follow her. It wasn't as though she had a choice really with the half a dozen centurions that had fanned out around the pair.

_Damned nice of them, going slow for me when they are the ones who hurt my leg in the first place. _The injury sent fire up her leg from her knee till it reverberated around her body, each step feeling more painful then the last. Behind her a Centurions eye glows in the sun, making sure nothing happened to her. She felt a pang of sympathy for Starbuck and for the first time fully appreciated how hard it was for the woman to rescue herself off of that red moon.

"Where are we going?" Laura queried, the Six just turned around and shook her head, blue eyes not revealing anything to Laura. Were they taking her off to kill her? A Worry that had been around earlier seemed more and more likely with each step she took forward away from the heavy Raider they had loaded her up earlier this morning.

Nearing a grove of trees the cylon stopped, and looked back at Laura sadly. "This is the place." Place for what she didn't know until she stepped close enough she could see, they had taken her glasses away so it was harder to see then one might expect. It was a grave, a gravestone, made of metal that glinted when the sun hit it at a certain angle.

"We thought this would be easier then an announcement," The blonde started out tentatively, Caprica that was her name, "And the cylon who killed him has been destroyed and will never exist again. His name was Jared. The Two with the black hair"

Laura almost fell down in shock. At the foot of the grave was a bundle of flowers, handpicked by the surroundings, obviously recently left there. But it was the name on the grave that really got to her. Samuel T. Anders. Sam was dead. Kara's husband was dead. And he'd been killed by the cylons. Here was another name to be added on a long list of people and if the Galactica was around another picture to put up.

"Does his wife know?" She can't help but ask, and the unfairness of it all collapsed around her. The people hadn't seen hide nor hair of the viper pilot and Laura couldn't help but to wonder if somewhere farther off in the distance Kara had been put to rest.

"She was there." Caprica stated, and Laura's hate of the things grows deeper. They probably made her watch them kill her husband, who knows what else those monsters were doing to her, images of the farm creep into her head and Laura is even more horrified, just because they stopped taking in new subjects didn't mean they didn't stop the testing. From what she knew they were very interested in the brash blonde pilot, what kind of horrors had they subjected her to?

Sensing Laura's disgust the cylon quickly tries to make amends. "We got her out, she's okay now, she's doing better and-"

Laura broke her off "There is no excuse for anything you have done. You've murdered people, torn apart families, destroyed things, Raped woman in the name of research, and yet the fact you gave her a little bit of medical attention somehow makes it better?"

Shame flooded the elegant imitation of a woman's features and she said quietly to the Centurions "Get her everything she needs and let her start teaching again." The cylon looks sad, remorseful and as though her face is full of guilt. But Laura doesn't much care. At the end of the day they are just lying machines and though they've let her go now, it's only a matter of time before they try to kill her. Just like they were trying to kill them all.

Peace? _What complete and utter bullshit_. The former school teacher thought angrily. _What complete utter bullshit._


	23. Chapter 23

Hello again! I know, it has been a long time but some real life stuff has gotten in the way, that should be clearing up soon so updates will hopefully be more frequent. Oh and as a side note, this chapter is dark, but things will get brighter soon, And as always thank you for reading.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 23-<strong>

**Leoben-**

These last days had been nothing but worse, not better. Nothing indicated she was recovering, or even beginning to start the process. With every day passing, he felt as though he was losing more and more ground. The few words she had spoken afterwards had turned to silence. Each day she ate less and when he went to comfort her he could tell she had lost weight. He could even see it in her eyes, whatever light Jared had been unable to extinguish in his initial attack had flickered to nothingness, the green eyes once so full of expression turned to blank, emotionless orbs. Beyond the grave the cylon was still laughing at him and his inability to help this woman. Leoben was more than sure of that.

His tired body moved on automatic from the couch to the bedroom, her cries making him move faster without even giving it any thought. Tonight seemed like every night that had preceded it after she had been discharged from Simon's care. He would spend a good half hour to a full two hours comforting her to fall back asleep, and then the day would start again. After she woke up, she would take a shower, and then maybe she would go to eating area and pick at her food, maybe even eat a little bit. The rest of the time she spent staring out a window, completely silent until the next meal she could pick at. He had asked her multiple times if she wanted to go outside, maybe to go visit Sam's grave even. She had not answered him and after long time he had stopped asking her such things. She didn't even really acknowledge him anymore, just silently accepting the fact he was there and was not going away. He didn't know what was worse, her fighting him ever second of the way her complete lack of fire. She hadn't even tried to kill him or hurt him in some way, and if that hadn't been a big indicator something was wrong, he didn't know what was.

A part of him wondered if she been this way after Zak had died and his mind just as quickly had answered his own question. Of course not, she had gone to work on the Galactica, and one thing he had learned from Boomer was that even during peacetime, everyone on a Battlestar worked. Here he had nothing to occupy her, no job for her to get up to. He knew what she had gone through also played a very large role in her reactions. He just didn't know what to do. He had brought her various things to hopefully get her away from just listly staring out that damned window. He brought her all kinds of things, puzzles, books that were not in his library, models to assemble. Nothing had worked. Each time he brought it to her, the small hope that, maybe this time she would come out of her mind's dark recesses, was diminished as she accepted his gift, set it next to her, and never touched it again. A small pile of them had accumulated on his coffee table until he added the books to his alphabetized library and put the puzzles and things on a shelf. He told her where they were. She had never once gone looking for them.

Once he entered the bedroom, he scooped the figure in the bed up; a trick he had learned for calming her down, once she awoke was it helpful for her to be in someone's embrace. She had called out for multiple people in the last weeks. The list grew, Lee, Sam, Zak, her best friend Helo, The Admiral who served as her father figure, even her own father who had left her all those years ago to suffer her mother's rage. Not once was his name ever called, a fact Leoben had only recently come to accept. Kara did not love him the way he loved her. And now because of Jared maybe she never would. They were biologically identical, despite all the physical changes Jared had done to himself, a fact he knew was not lost on her. Sometimes out of the corner of his eyes, he thought he saw her watching him with hate. He never quite caught it, but it would not surprise him. As far as she was concerned, he had effectively killed her husband, every single cylon had. They were no different in her mind. They were all the enemy to her, all to be hated and all to be killed.

And yet, in a way he had. He had chosen not to shot the cylon monster the second he arrived, able to take him by surprise and kill him instantly. He had instead wasted time, valuable time that could have made the difference between Samuel's life or death. It was something he didn't think he would forgive himself for. _And the whole business of making him choose. _He felt as though he had as good as ordered his death: because in the end, Kara was more important to him. He knew deep down his choice and it was Kara all the way. Leoben's own nightmares never let him forget that, maybe not on purpose, but his actions had helped lead to the former Pyramid Player's demise. There was no denying that, and it was something Leoben would have to learn to live with, for he refused to erase memories that were unappealing to remember. It was his pence he decided, his punishment for his death.

Kara stirred in his arms from the nightmare and he gently rocked her back and forth, shhing her to provide comfort in any way he can. He loves her even if she doesn't love him. He knows she is all he has, nothing holds the same attraction as before, and he only goes out of his apartment for council meetings. He doesn't want to leave her alone, the action feeling a little bit like abandonment to him. She reminds him of a lost kitten he had once rescued when he lived on Caprica and given to someone on his street. The kitten had been scared, lost and left all alone with no one to take care of it, to love it and to give it meaning in the world. In more than one way, Kara was like that little kitten.

She stirs in his arms again and he holds her tight. Sometimes, during these nights, he entertains the notion that things are different, a fantasy for his mind to hold onto. Kara loved him in these dreams, and it was him, not Lee, she said I love you to and asked not to leave her alone. He knew what it was. It was pathetic and he knew that little fact very well. But he couldn't quite stop himself for pretending for a half an hour each night while comforting her that this woman in his arms loved him too. That she said it to him, and the times she had sought affection from one of the men she loved instead of refusing her because it was another man she was thinking of, she had wanted his affection and his alone. It would lead to nothing but heartache in the end, but he simply couldn't help himself.

Her head moves from his shoulder to peer up at him and he wonders who he is tonight. Perhaps he is Lee Adama again, he had been yesterday. Her eyes quickly close themselves again and she returns to her original position in his arms and goes still. And he knows something is different this time.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

Not much topped a disappointment of thinking you were in one man's arms and then realizing you were in another's. That had happened. More than once. With multiple different men. Not that any of that really mattered anymore. In fact not much really did matter anymore. If she was being honest with herself, she had only lasted this long because for some reason she thought things would change, things would get better, a resistance member would come for her.

But they hadn't. They probably thought her dead with Sam or they simply realized that they were better off without Kara screwup Thrace. Sammy's name brings another wave of pain just as sharp as the last ones. She had been hoping it was his arms she was waking up in. The fact they were Leoben's just made it worse. Scrambling away from him she gets to the other side of the bed and closes herself off from Leoben. The nightmare is still fresh in her mind. The pictures refuse to go away, the images burned in her brain. They will never leave her, just like seeing Zak's viper hit the tarmac and burst into flame will never leave her. Just like trying to get to Sam and the cylon standing above him with her knife smirking will never leave her. Everything replays in her mind again and again. Maybe it is the Gods punishment for her role in their deaths, forced to watch them die over and over again.

"Get away from me." Anger colors her every word and she feels more alive then she had in days. "Don't touch me. Gods what you must have been doing all this time and I never found out." The anger feels good, it brings a tiny spark of life back into her body, and it gives the lost woman a purpose. For now at least.

"Kara I'd never do that." he interjects in her sentence loudly, desperately trying to move by her side and take her hand but she snatches it away and pulls her arms around herself. "I would never ever hurt you that way. Do you understand. Ever. I was only trying to give comfort to you from your nightmares." Yeah, right. The same people who caused them wanted to make it all better? Because that made a whole bunch of fracking sense. Then again, nothing made sense to her anymore. She wondered daily if she was losing it, and decided she might be. Things that used to be a simple accepted truths were now thrown up in the air for controversy.

"Right." She doesn't know she is arguing. Her tired body just wants to sleep and the comfort of someone, anyone to cling to. She instantly dismisses the idea, pushing it away in her mind as to not think about it. Leoben is not someone to take comfort in. She should never accept help or anything like it from a cylon. Liars, traitors, and monsters every single one of them.

But the anger she now feels is good, she feels a bit more alive then she had been. Though when her anger is spent she knows it will come back. At the end of the day Sam is still dead along with their barely formed child who had been six weeks old. The fleet is still gone, and her life is still controlled by a cylon who is convinced he has feelings and no one cares enough to even try and see what happened to a former viper pilot who had held the top gun title.

"Kara please, listen to me. I just want to help you-"

"Help me?" Fury reigns and anger is the only thing she can feel. In a way she is glad, it numbs her pain sos he can't feel it. "Can you bring me back the unborn baby I lost? Can you bring me back Sam? Can you make the cylons stop hurting us and let us all be? Because if you can't JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" She hates that her voice quivers, hates that the words bring back memories attached and she just wants to cry. She only lets herself cry in the shower where he can't hear her, where only she can hear her weakness.

Silence follows her outburst then his voice, quieter "I had no idea you lost a child." He genuinely sounds sad and pained. He had no right, they were the ones that killed them. Him, them, all of them. A part of her was angry he should act like he cared, another was simply too tired to argue.

"It's not like you care."

"I care very much. I know you don't think so but I do. I always will care. That baby was innocent. Sam was innocent. Their deaths did not go unpunished."

She turns around to face him, still sitting on the bed, a rumpled white tee shirt and a pair of shorts. His face is earnest and she can't help but wonder again if maybe Karl was right and these things did heave feelings. Disgust welled up inside. _Bonding with your captors? How weak of you Kara. _Her mother's voice sneered and she turned back around, away from him and everything he said. _He mixes lies with truths._ His hand gently reached for her shoulder and he moved so he was next to her.

She didn't look at him, didn't want to either. She couldn't comprehend what it all meant anymore. She was tired of fighting and wanted it all to go away. He slowly wrapped his arms around her and she didn't stop him, the anger drained and the pain inside her back. The never ending, soul crushing agony that came when you lost the people you loved. The kind that came with having everything that makes you weak exposed. The kind that came with those weakness exploited. A pain no cylon would ever know. What did they care about such things? They couldn't care at all. They couldn't care less that she had lost her husband, a man she loved, and his son or daughter all in the same day. They didn't have the nightmare of each night believing you were back in that cell, experiencing pain to the point you begged for the mercy of death. But they acted like it.

Scratching at her eyes, she couldn't stop the tears that formed there as thoughts of those she had loved and lost came to the front of her mind and stayed there. Her gentle loving husband who never doubted her and never wavered in his loyalty, he had been a far better man then she deserved, and now he was dead. The tears turned to sobs and Leoben wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She tells herself it is only because she doesn't have the strength to push him away anymore. Stroking her hair and letting her cry on his shoulder. No words she could say could even express how utterly wrong this was, he was the enemy, he was to be killed not used as a fracking shoulder to cry on and yet, "Please don't leave." Her voice wavers through the sobs and she hates it. She hates that she is needy, hates that he knows it and is here to hear her, hates that they've reduced her to this and hates most of all that her entire soul feels on display for him.

"I'll never leave you Kara. You know that" He said and he gently laid her down tucking her in the bed. Her sobs are not as violent but she is still shaking and he lays down next to her, wrapping his body around hers, the comfort of warmth passed from one body to another. He strokes her hair from her face, the other arm wrapped around her torso keeping her body spooned with his and she falls asleep this way, her sobs quieting as she cried herself to sleep.

It didn't make sense, none of it did. Everything hurt still. But she felt safe curled up where she was. She would analyze what it all meant when she woke up, but for now, it felt good to feel protected and cared for. Even if it was just a fantasy that wasn't going to last.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

The first thing he notices upon waking up is that he is waking up alone. Not that he didn't expect it, he knew Kara would not be interested in being around him for a while, a man can dream though right? He still had not realistically expected her to still be with him after last night, but he felt that maybe she was finally starting to heal. She had opened up to him; at least a little bit abut her lost child and let him seen a piece of her pain. The pain she must be in after everything, even things he had not known about. She had even let him stay with her, even asking him not to leave like he normally did in the nights when he.

He pulled his body to his feet, he would have to tread carefully now, mistakes could be deadly. Did she regret letting him see that side of her? Would she block him out? Was there any part of her grateful he comforted her, providing a function that few were allowed the privilege of. There was only one way to find out the answers he was looking for, he quietly searched the apartment. He was unable to find her on his first look through, and a quick peek through revealed she was not in the hall way. Nor was she in any of the closets. At first he had thought she had escaped.

Relief filled him at the sight of the bathroom light on. She was probably just in the shower, he could hear water running after all. Just as he was about to turn away and go back to sleep, water began to leak from the bottom of the door. And he knew, almost instinctively, that something was very very wrong here.

"Kara?" He called out, fear layering every letter. He is greeted with silence. Banging on the door receives no answer and fear creeps up in him, close to the one he had while searching the prisons for Kara in a race against time. _No God, please no _He tries to open the door but he can't, she has managed to block it somehow. His imagination takes over providing his head with images while panic puts his body on overdrive in trying to reach her.

Ice grips his veins and he pushes on the door with all the strength he has, hoping and praying he isn't too late. He can only think of one reason that she wouldn't answer him, and it isn't pretty. _Was what he had done not enough? _Finally throwing his weight in for what must be the fifth time the door opens and he splashes in the water trying to get to her. The scene that greets him isn't what he expected. Water ran from the faucet down over the vanity pooling in the floor and at first he couldn't see her figure from her hiding place until his second scan of the bathroom.

A metal object hits the ground, blood splashing from it and he can see Kara, pressed up against a corner in the area created between the sink and the toilet. Her head is down, and she won't meet his eyes. Whether it is because of fear or shame, or some mix of the two he doesn't know. He turns off the water and reaches down to be on her level. She still averts her eyes, refusing to look at him. Refusing to acknowledge what she had tried to do to herself.

He reaches forward for her arm and she offers no resistance. The cut, not even fully formed still has blood leaking from it. His heart aches and pounds, how can he do this? How can he make a woman who so obviously wants to die want to live again instead, let alone love him? God had told him they would be together but not even Leoben could have seen this many challenges on that road. He has to forcefully remind himself that can't think of that now, Kara is soaked to the bone and has started to shiver and he needs to get a bandage on her cut and have Simon look at it later when the rest of the world is awake.

He silently reaches under the sink for a first aid kit and takes out everything he needs to bandage her wrist. Throughout the entire process she offers no explanations and neither does he. In a way, he somehow thinks he should have been expecting this a long time ago and was surprised it had not come sooner. He had made no process and she had only been getting worse. Maybe he had not seen this coming because he simply hadn't wanted to.

"We will got to Simon and have him look at this later today so that it doesn't get infected." He starts unable to think of what else to say, at her nod he can't help but adding "I love you" almost impulsively. The need for her to know that she is loved and valued by him almost overwhelming. She ignores him as usual and he pretends it doesn't hurt. Maybe she can play pretend but he can't, he can't stand to see her this way. He reaches out to cradle the side of her face, gently pulling her eyes to his. He can't see anything in them, nothing beyond a pain in them that makes him want to get a copy of Jared again and completely destroy him. How one of his own, could even have agreed to cause this amount of pain reflected back at him, let alone had delighted in causing it, he would never know. "I do love you Kara. I love you very much." he tries to get her to realize this, get her to realize that without her he is nothing, but she ignores him. She had retreated back into her own little world and there is nothing he can do to pull her out of it.

He picks up the bloody object, part of the toilet, cleans it, and fixes the piece back into the toilet. Another thing he will have to modify to keep her from hurting herself. He pulls out some spare towels and begins to mop up the water, while Kara gets to her feet.

She goes out of the bathroom, her wet feet leaving behind footprints on his floor and has gone over to her window again, her fingers idly playing at the bandage on her wrist, her green eyes just staring out the window and onto the landscape. She doesn't say anything, and he knows that despite what happened last night, with the exception of the visit to Simon, today will be like all the other days since he got her back.

He knows he has failed her spectacularly. If he hadn't, then she wouldn't have tried to kill herself. He had to give her a reason to live, but for now until he thought of something eh was simply out of options.

Leoben knew of an Oracle that a Three had gone to see about something. Maybe the Oracle could help him. He didn't believe in the human religion, yet meeting someone else who had foresight could maybe point out to him where he had gone wrong. It was the only thing he could do. He had simply exhausted all other options.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24-**

**Caprica-**

She normally never liked being on the basestar. Sure she could project, but if you had the choice between imagining fresh air and fresh soil, and actually having it, wouldn't you pick the real thing? But there was a cylon council meeting in the next few hours and she had to attend it. She was not actually a representative for her line, that honor belonged to a Six who had named herself Natalie, but they wanted her input due to her multiple dealings with humans. They meant well, but sometimes she hated it, she felt like she was betraying Gaius even more when she told them how the human mind would think about a new proposal. Then she felt just plain silly.

The meetings had been held in Colonial one, until the line representative for the Fives had gone missing right after the meeting ended. Literally, he walked out the door and not twenty to forty steps away from the ship been snatched by a human group and disappeared into the night. More and more cylons were disappearing without a trace, humans, for that was the only explanation, were growing bolder by the day. Caprica could see no way to win, and more than once prayed to God a solution would present itself. She was not naive enough to think things would just work out and everyone would just play nice, not after what had happened. Peace would be a long and arduous process.

Just in the last week, a note had been nailed in public places stating all cylon captives would be returned alive and unharmed if all human prisoners were released and all bodies be returned to them for their burial. Cavil sternly denied them what they wanted and a few heavy raiders had taken the toll in what was sure to be the first of many strikes. Caprica didn't know how or where they made explosives, but they were undeniably effective. Nothing the cylons had was safe, not even her church that had been bombed, completely destroyed and defaced with paint by a group calling themselves the Sons of Aries. She had come back after a few days to pray in the little building and had been unable to stop the tears at the sight of the rubble. Was nothing sacred anymore?

The cylon leaders had publicly condemned the attacks and offered high incentives for their capture, but they had gotten no words, tips-offs, or any information since the offer went out days prior. Humans would often turn on each other, squabbling and disagreeing, but one thing they seemed to all agree on was the treatment of the cylons that had destroyed their homes. Why, just this morning an Eight had gone through the settlement and been repeatedly harassed and attacked, found near death when she had managed to escape her attackers who had not been caught, and had smartly worn masks to disguise their faces.

Cavil and D'Anna had high hopes for the New Caprica Police force, people had shown up in numbers, but privately Caprica thought they were fools. Handing these humans power along with knowledge of cylon activities was not smart in her opinion. But still, she had no real power; she was a voice of many. It was not her division of control in the settlement anyways, she had no real power, there would be nothing that she could do even if she did have authority.

Caprica stopped when she heard an unusual noise. She was outside a Four's lab, and while noises were not unusual coming out of labs, this one was different than all the other noises like whirs of machinery and a voice ranting, frustrated at not being able to find something. It was more like a cry to her than a normal lab noise. Something helpless, small and injured, like that one time she had convinced Gaius to stop the car to help a cat that had gotten its tail run over by some other careless driver. Gaius had hated the cat, but until she find a place for the cat he had tolerated it.

Caprica knew she probably should not intervene, it simply wasn't her place, but she simply couldn't help it. This Four was known by many to be a bit odd and there had been talk of boxing him, he had vehemently protested the closing of the farms and begged for more time, more subjects, anything. They set him on creating a hybrid, but nothing had been successful so far. Or so everyone had been told, the high council included because she had asked Leoben once, and he knew absolutely nothing.

First she knocked on the door then told herself that he must have already gone to the meeting or was out and about for some reason. Everyone was allowed to attend if they wanted, but only a few were allowed to speak. Leoben was out again, forcing Landon to take his place, something had come up with Kara apparently. With her knock the crying increased in volume, and she was unable to justify the reasons she should walk away. Something in there needed help and had a reason to cry out.

The cylon model pushed open the door and moved in. There was medical equipment everywhere and it was messy. Different theories were anywhere, drawings and charts of data posted on the walls haphazardly. All the desks and work spaces were covered to and she wrinkled her nose a bit. how did he find anything? It was clean and completely sterile she was sure, but in that mad scientist kind of way, and the blonde felt very uncomfortable. But she pushed on; forcing herself not to forget what was going on.

She moved past rows and rows of beds, or incubators, whatever they were. The noise was in the back and she stopped a bit. There was a little girl there, crying. She couldn't be over a year or so, her light white blonde hair was not clean and she was crying, though Caprica had no idea why. Than she saw and got angry. Next to the bed were notes on wondering how she would react to various drugs, or different kinds of stimuli. Simon was experimenting on her, learning what made her tick, studying her. And it made her absolutely angry beyond belief.

"Hey there little one." Caprica reached a hand down to soothe the distressed little girl. "God is surely watching out for you, he sent me to you. I'm going to get you out of here, I promise. Don't worry." After about fifteen minutes she was able to soothe the cries into small whimpers, and she kept stroking the little girl's hair.

She was furious that anything had been treated this way, even if this little girl may turn out to be fully human, there was no excuse for treating her this way. But she wasn't fully human. She was a hybrid if the little plaque next to her with all of her information was to be believed.

Next to a date, and the word female, and the designation hybrid were the girl's parents, Leoben Conoy, Cylon model Two Copy number One, and Capt. Kara Thrace. Leoben was going to be in shock. The entire cylon council was going to react in shock this had been kept a secret. She knew for a fact there had been no announcement, and everyone had been told the experiments failed.

She did some quick math, and realized with a start this child must have been conceived when the farms were still open. The secret had been kept that long. The Farms had even been shut down because they had not been successful. But they had, for whatever reason God had gone into that place and allowed a miracle to occur. So why was the secret covered up?

"I'll be right back little one." Blue eyes looked up at her, innocent blue eyes. "Yeah, I'll be right back, and things will get better I promise. I'll take you to meet your Daddy. You'll like that won't you? He's a good man."

She quickly and quietly left the room after the girl had fallen asleep and bumped into Natalie on the way out. For a moment the two just stared at each other, confusion etched all over the Six's face. The sister Six was surprised to see her come out of a Four's lab and opened her mouth to ask questions, most of the Sixes disliked the fours and vice versa, but Caprica quickly cut her off. "You've got to see this Natalie. It's important, really important"

Caprica turned on her heel and walked back into the lab, Natalie following behind.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

He felt all hollow on the inside. Like someone had gone through and made everything inside him numb and feelingless, like nothing at all. He felt truly like a machine for the first time he could remember, moving on automatic on someone else's commands via his programming. Only one thought played on loop through his brain over and over again _Kara tried to kill herself, Kara tried to kill herself, Kara tried to kill herself. _It played back in his head, like a broken record, never letting him forget, never letting him stop remembering. It was a constant reminder he had failed in helping her. That despite what he had done to help save her from drowning, she just went even farther under the water and had now stopped struggling for the surface where air and safety was. She didn't even want to swim up anymore, she was perfectly content to just go under and stay there. Forever. Gone. Away from him. Away from everything.

Kara was walking next to him, and she didn't move to touch him and he knew better than to touch her without her permission, the last thing he wanted was to scare her away. He knew on some level his touch, no matter how innocent was the same as Jared's, it was unavoidable being they were biological identical. Her arms were wrapped around herself, and the bandage peeked out from under her jacket's sleeve. She wasn't looking at him, instead eyeing the gray wall on the corridor, or the concrete floor, or the ceiling with it's fluorescent light bulbs that ran down the length of the corridor leaving no corner shrouded in darkness. Not that was any way unusual. She walked slower then she had used to, the bounce in her step was gone, as though she was an automaton herself. _Just going through the motions, but inside she didn't really care anymore. _And no matter how hard Leoben had tried he couldn't make her care. Not about him, not about life, not even for anything he could think of. Kara Thrace had really given up, and the fight he saw in her when he was first acquainted with Starbuck was gone. Starbuck had died in that cell, Leoben realized, and Kara was following her pilot ego. It just had taken her a while longer to get to that point.

He was bringing her to Simon, unsure of anything else he could do. Simon was just a doctor for physical wounds; he could not help Leoben very much on the ones in the mind, spirit and soul. But this was his very last hope. There was nothing else he could do beyond this and pray, he had no other alternatives. And though God worked in mysterious ways, Leoben knew Kara needed a lot more help than prayer could provide her.

"Come on Kara this way," He said taking her to an elevator, not wanting to trigger any bad memories with the stairs. She complied with his command wordlessly, not looking at him at all. Though she followed his command, it seemed like Leoben had not said a word at all. There were no smart comments, derogatory remarks, just simple following of his directions. He couldn't read her emotions, was she ashamed, was she upset he caught her? She was expressionless as a stone, a wall he couldn't get breach, and now he realized maybe he never would.

It was not a comforting thought.

The Elevator ride was tense. One the second level a Three came onboard and nodded slightly at them, "Two." She said, not even acknowledging Kara's presence. For her part Kara just stood in the corner and gazed down at the floor of the lift. They both got off at the first floor. While the Three turned left to a separate elevator, the one that went to the prisons lower floors, with just a turn to the right and he arrived at the centers Medical ward.

There was a Six waiting who had been informed of their arrival. Wordlessly she opened the door and disappeared. A minute later she came out with Four. Simon took her inside, and told Leoben to stay outside. Kara followed the Doctor's motion without even looking back at him. So he was regulated to waiting outside, she didn't even call for him to come with her. He didn't know of a reason she should have, heck, it would probably be better for her to not have any reminders of the Two that had hurt her and killed her husband. He still can't help but feel rejected somehow, pained by her lack of need for him. then again this is Kara, who would die before she asked him for anything, that was just who she was.

The chairs that were outside the heavy metal doors in what resembled to a waiting room, though why there was such a thing he didn't know. Cylons did not wait outside hospital doors for one another, and they did not put humans here. He couldn't recall putting a waiting room in the plans. It has originally been another part of the sick bay. Then he shook his head to clear his thoughts, it was inconsequential. As seemingly required, the chairs were not comfortable, and he soon stopped sitting down on a chair, instead just leaning against the wall, trying hard to not run over to the door, stare through the window on the door at eye level, and find out what was going on inside.

Leoben had been nervously watching the door for maybe five minutes when a Six who had become a nurse shyly approached him. "Two, you are supposed to go up to the main basestar right now. Something important requires your immediate attention." she said quietly, afraid of aggravating him or doing something that would irritate him.

"Can't it wait?" He asked, and proceeded to mummer of few choice words under his breath, a luxury he never really let himself indulge in when things got bad. Landon could handle things fine without him, why was he being summoned then? He had nothing to contribute to today's agenda. Which was lucky because Kara needed him more than they did. This had better be good to be called right now.

"No, the message says it can't. I have no idea what it is about; just that something extremely important requires your attention." The Six said timidly, afraid he would attack the messenger probably, and he sighed and closed his eyes a moment. _Of all the times to need him _This had better help Kara somehow, or he was just giving Landon the damned seat just to spite him.

"Wait for me to come back and pick her up then?" He asked and the nurse nodded. Resigned he walked back out the door to go find a heavy raider to take him up in the airfield. The Airfield was luckily close by being he had tried to keep the area the cylons used as close as possible. He prayed as he walked along a Centurion pilot, _God please show me a way to help her. _

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

After being ushered into Simon's office, or lab, or whatever the hell this room was called, she wordlessly sat down on the exam table and her fingers played nervously in her lap. Even after all these years, it was a habit every time she was in a medical facility.

He might as well go mad scientist on her, her mind morbidly decided; it wasn't like she would care if he did. She didn't care about anything anymore. Maybe then she would still be useful for something after all. Wasn't she useless now, couldn't fight, couldn't be anything anymore? Not a wife, not a soldier, pilot, respected officer, a nothing, a waste of space that got people killed. Now, Kara Thrace was nothing more than just a poor and pitiful excuse for a human being, she knew that much. _Mama was right. I was just too stubborn to listen._

"So I am told you've hurt yourself." She shrugged, not bothering to find the words to defend herself anymore. She had always had this feeling, hovering on the edge of her consciousness, but something or someone had always been there to beat it back. Whether it was flying or a person to cajole her out of the dark corner, it had never managed to take her this far in this much. Not even while hunting Scar. The dark had always been there, but never overwhelmed her so much like it did now, drowning out the light until she didn't know which way was up anymore.

"I don't know what Leoben expects me to do. I can make sure the wound doesn't get infected but beyond what I know of basic psych, I'm not help to you at all." The Four muttered as he put on gloves, more for his benefit than hers. Kara didn't mind, it was a bit better than the silent stares and Leoben walking around on eggshells like she might break into a thousand pieces any second. He looked up at her seriously "If you ask me he is expecting a miracle."

He motioned for her to put her arm out, and so she did as instructed, not even wincing as he wiped the wound with anti-septic. Simon talked throughout the entire process which she found oddly soothing, if cylon doctors could be soothing. The last one she had met had been pretty quiet. But what did she know? It wasn't like her opinion mattered anymore, especially not to cylons. Maybe if it had they wouldn't have killed Sammy.

Kara had stopped caring what the cylons did to her anymore. They weren't going to let her go, and they weren't going to let her escape, by any means. They trapped her in some little frakked up fantasy world, if Leoben was to be believed it was to be a Haven. But in reality, it had been more of a hell for her, constantly watched, supervised, and under someone else's control. And that wasn't even going into what happened with Sam.

"So you got any coping methods?" The cylon jerked her back to the present while he scribbled on his clipboard words she could not read. His creators had even given him the messy, unreadable scrawl of most doctors. Clever. Terribly witty really. She might make a joke about that if she was back on the Galactica and the reigning queen of the pilots' recreation room. But she wasn't, and probably never would be again.

"Drinking?" She asked, muttering her first word in a few days that she wanted to actually say. Mindless, weak pleas in the middle of the night did not count. She had decided that in her mind. Nothing that happened at night counted, she forced the memory down, cutting off its life. It, like so many other memories, would never again live to see the light of day ever again. Only would she relive it when the Gods judged her.

"No can do, sorry, too much of a risk to loose you to the bottle." He shrugged apologetic and Kara closed herself off again, though she would rather not. It was truly pathetic how much she craved for any contact, human, cylon, just anything breathing to get Leoben out of her frakking mind. Something, anything just something else than what her life had dwindled down into. Heck she would even settle for a cat.

She let herself amuse the thought, wasn't like she had much to do besides think about things these days. It would be a little she cat, black and white with short and soft fur and her name would be Starbuck. She would scare dogs away, play fetch and sit up on her hind legs like a dog, and yowl until she was fed food.

Simon's next words pulled her back into the real world. The one she was desperately trying to avoid. "Anything else?" She almost shook her head, but stopped as a thought came to mind and then she shut it off. She had been going to say painting but the last thing the toasters needed was another weakness to exploit. Hell, knowing Leoben he would probably go and 'interpret' every single one she painted. She could picture him in her head, 'This green right here represents your inner turmoil as you push against your destiny.' Yeah okay. Some destiny then, killing everyone you ever cared about.

"No then?" The cylon asked again, and she shrugged him off. "Okay fine, have it your way. There is a bed over there you can sit on, nap on, whatever until Leoben comes back. He got called up on official business, something important that could not possibly wait. I want to check you over again in two weeks or sooner if that looks infected. I'll give you some extra bandages and I want you to gain more weight and sleep more okay, if you need meds to sleep we have those too okay?" The cylon went off and held her gaze until she nodded. She pretended to be annoyed as she stalked over the bed he pointed at and flounced down but privately Kara didn't mind.

It meant she could be alone for a little while.

* * *

><p><strong>Caprica- <strong>

Natalie had been appalled as she had been, maybe even more so. Caprica remembered Natalie had been among humans in her mission of the colonies, but it was a very different mission. The Six had wanted to have a child, and tried until the end of the worlds to get pregnant to no avail. She left the colony Picon shortly before the world's ended after her second miscarriage.

Upon the sight Caprica had to show her, Natalie set her jaw, picked up the little girl right out of the incubator, and walked into the meeting with the baby in her hands and Caprica at her side. The room grew even quieter, became very still, and began waiting for the next move of the Six, who had suddenly become quite unpredictable and scary. Sixs had an infamous temper, while Eights were slightly bi-polar, a Six's temper was something of legends. When they had the angry glint in their blue eyes, with a set jaw and clenched muscles you prayed you were not the object of their wrath.

"Caprica, send a message to Leoben that something has come up and we need him right now. As for the rest of you, if you are not a member of the council, excluding Caprica and Landon who can stay when Leoben arrives, you are to leave." The words were quick and sure, and Natalie excluded an air of command that would send most people scurrying off to follow instructions.

Grumbles ran through the room as various cylons in various states of shock at the female cylon giving orders, but they all began to move. Some like Eights went wordless, whispering to one another about the baby. Others went close up to Natalie, telling her this violated their rights, a group mainly headed by the Ones and their pet Fives. Natalie simply ignored them all, not making a single noise and only looked annoyed. Once the small group discovered they would make no headway, they quickly made themselves scare as the baby started to cry under the onslaught of noises.

"What is the meaning of this Six?" Cavil demanded, furious she had dared start making orders even though they were technically a democracy. Cavil always seemed to hold the final say, the final word and unless he got trapped by some law, the cylon nation was at the whim of this machine. Though he had never steered them wrong, Caprica for the first time wondered if that was a good thing.

"According to notes in a Four's lab. This child is a hybrid." Natalie glared daggers at the Four, who seemed as shocked as herself. "A four who had worked in the farms failed to report a success, and has been testing the child ever since she was born under unnatural circumstances. She is about 12 months of age, she feels underweight, and she needs to see a real doctor immediately to be sure she has no lasting health concerns from what God-knows she was injected with."

"And you just happened to stroll into a Four's lab now?"

"Does it matter Cavil?" Natalie bit back, some of her anger seeping through her hardened demeanor, "She's a hybrid, our future, and she was being mistreated! Which is absolutely unacceptable! She's a little girl not some frakking lab rat to play insert the substance with!" Natalie was very upset, and Caprica stepped into to explain, hoping her sister would forgive her for it.

"I discovered the child. I was walking to the meeting, the door was ajar, and I heard her crying in distress," She explained quickly and to the One's raised eyebrows "I couldn't just leave her there, so I went to tell the Council but found Natalie first."

"And yet, we need a way to reproduce Six. If you bothered to think with your head you would realize that this child holds the best interests we have, we ought to study-"

"Study nothing!" an Eight interjected over him, furious. Caprica always held the idea that the fact an Eight had fallen in love and gotten pregnant by a human that, successful pregnancy or not, the idea being possible had made them more sympathetic to humans. Or humans that fit in their fairy tale of a family of their own one day anyways. "It's just a baby, who should be with her parents."

"Who are the parents?" Three demanded excitement in her own voice along with a touch of reverence. Threes were some of the cylons who regarded children as a miracle of God, this was sure to be no exception.

"Leoben and Kara Thrace." Natalie answered.

"Awwww the pet human, how quaint." Cavil mocked before Natalie snapped at him to be quiet, as their voices' volume has started to bother the baby. As usual One listened to no one."Come on Six, you can't deny the possibility of that being her parents is cute. I mean honestly, it's probably his dream come true. Now he can really play doll-house."

"That isn't the problem here," Four said, for the first time speaking. "The problem is, how did this escape under our notice for so long, and how do we punish him?" the cylon rubbed his eyes with his hands, looking suddenly very tired. There was one word on every ones mind that came to mind instantly; boxing.

Caprica knew that the increase in boxing was not good. There would come a time when boxing would not be the right answer, or would be impossible as a solution, and they could not come to rely on it. But the idea that anyone could hurt one of their own like that, it was so horrid to her. This baby was their future, why take the chance you might accidentally extinguish the flame with some crazed experiment?

"Four obviously had help; he couldn't have hidden it from our inspector's notice." The Five added to the conversation, "Someone has been screwing up, or has been helping him." There were nods around the table, at the very least they could all agree on that.

"All in favor of returning the child to her parents say aye, all of those not in favor of returning the child to her parents say nay." Natalie commanded and her grin grew on there were only two voices of dissent, nowhere near enough to swing the vote. "The ayes have it, now we can move on to other parts of the meeting, in the meantime where the frak is Leoben?"

The doors opened and a harried Leoben entered. "This better be," he trailed off noticing the infant in Natalie's arms. Natalie smiled softly at Leoben and gestured him closer then she proceeded to hand him the infant. "She's absolutely," But the Two couldn't seem to find the words to describe what exactly it was he was feeling. Caprica remembered him telling her about a little girl he had seen. Was this the little girl he had seen?

"Leoben this is your daughter," Natalie made the introduction and the Two gently cradled the little girl and reached down to shift a lock of bright blonde hair away from her face. His hand lingered and softly stroked her hair. The sleeping baby woke up to look at him with curiosity. How quickly things can change, Caprica mused noting the happiness mixed with wonder written all over his features for all to see, how fast things become different.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

His brain had shut down. Under the stresses of the past day, he simply couldn't deal with much more at the current moment in time. He was vaguely aware of walking towards Natalie and taking the baby from her arms. He wrapped the blanket a little tighter around the little girl, who felt light, he didn't think a baby should be this light. But reaching down to stroke her hair and watching her open her eyes, Leoben was already loving the baby in his hands.

She was absolutely perfect Leoben decided. Her bright blue eyes were alert and regarded him with curiosity, a curled fist with tiny little fingers to make up one of her hands. Her bright blonde hair was dirty, but he would find out why later. His brain automatically picked out some of Kara's features, she had the same face, it was all Kara but the eyes. The eyes were all his, and who knew, they could even change to the beautiful mix of green gold. A walking breathing reminder of Kara, a fixture that even if Kara did not want to live in the universe, she still lived.

But even more than that, a child was the ultimate form of love two people could have, God would not allow this baby to be created if it wasn't for love. Leoben knew that, and sent a prayer to God, thanking him for his blessing and gift along with the amount of trust that was being placed in him to raise the cylons' future.

"We need to get her to a Doctor," Caprica told him gently, a soft smile on her face. She seemed happy, bubbly, and he wondered way, a pang of regret filled him at being so consumed in Kara's struggles he had neglected his closest cylon family. "Why don't you and I take her down to Simon on the ground complex's Medical center?"

"No, is there one closer?" He asked, starting to really think after the shock that he had a daughter, he really did have a daughter with the woman he loved. Even though no one had said her name, he knew. He could see her face in this little girl. At the looks he received, "I'd rather not spring this on Kara just yet." Leoben explained.

"The basestar's medical facility should be fine, We have an Eight who can take care of her." The Eight spoke up. "I think we should avoid putting her in Four's presence for a while, it might bring back some bad memories. At the very least give her some time to distance it, and make sure this Four was not helped by another" She added. "I'll call her now so she knows she is to be expecting you."

"Alright. Landon please continue to take my place in the meeting for the time being" The fellow Two, normally so bitter about politics nodded his head, either not offering a comment or realizing that the child was more important Leoben didn't know. He could make out a slight smile on his face though, as Landon stuck his hand in the data stream. It was a mark of pride, the Twos had Fathered the first cylon hybrid and he was sure every cylon would know soon.

He could sense Cavil fuming and idly Leoben wondered if the One had known about the child before she was revealed to the Council. Then he decided going after it was pointless, nothing could be proved until later, and accusing now would be worth nothing. Or if Cavil was just mad things had obviously not gone his way and there was nothing he could do about it. He had figured out long ago Cavil was better informed than all the rest of them, and purposefully kept it that way, there was just no way to go about proving it, or even a reason as to why that was. Maybe he was just a power hungry maniacal cylon.

"Caprica, why don't you and Leoben go down to the Nurse and make sure the baby is taken care of." Natalie said quiet, it was clear enough of a dismissal but Leoben stopped a moment. Obviously he and Caprica would not be a part of whatever investigation there was, and that was fine by him. He knew he was too close, and as long as the Four was punished and he could keep his daughter with him, he felt no reason to complain.

He frowned, lost in thought a few moments. The girl needed a name, she couldn't just be, the baby. He'd like to ask Kara, but she probably wouldn't say a word to him. As the euphoria of the news started to wear off he nervously wondered how she would react. But then, all at once, a name came to him, as though someone had whispered it in his ear.

"Kacey," he said, slightly correcting Natalie. "Her name is Kacey." And she nodded in approval, while several cylons returned their hands to the data stream, probably to inform all the other cylons of this new update. He looked at his daughter all the way to sick bay. _I have a daughter and her name is Kacey. Kacey Annabel Conoy._

It fit her.

* * *

><p>Notes: So tell me what you all think! And I am sorry about the delay and the much longer length of this chapter, I meant to stop it somewhere in there, but I could never find the exact right spot to cut the chapter off, so here it is all together. Also, if LiveJournal is more your thing this fic exists over there with the same author name. Thanks for reading.<p> 


	25. Chapter 25

Hey there Everyone! First of all, the next chapter of my other story will be coming soon so don't worry, and I am super extremely sorry for the delays. I have had all kinds of real life drama go down, and it really isn't any fun. But hopefully thigns are calming down now, which will make updates come faster. And as always, thank you for reading along.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

He paced outside the steel door across the concrete floor nervously. The nurse still looked at him, unsure quite what to make of him. Although probably her interest was more along the lines of the child Caprica was holding. _His Daughter _his mind corrected him. Leoben yawned, simply unable to help himself, it had been a very long night and a full day, and now he had to pick up Kara. Which was sure to be eventful, as though dealing with politics was simply not eventful and tiring enough for one day.

A rather large part of him was actually relatively afraid of what the news would do to Kara, already at a low point and the blonde woman was extremely unpredictable even at the best of times. He knew she had, 'issues' to put it mildly. He knew she had lost her unborn child, barely even formed. Was this God's way of giving her a second chance, but would Kara even see it that way? Would she refuse to care for the child? What if she thought he was lying to her?

The last one hurt, he had hated deceiving Kara in the past, and he would never do it again. But if she were to come right out and say he was a liar and the child wasn't his, he didn't know what he would do. The time frame was right, and Kacey had been premature. All the facts pointed to the fact Kacey was theirs. She was a bit smaller than she normally would be, and was fragile. But Kara had tendencies to throw all those gut feelings and logical reasonings to the wind even at the best of times, was he able to make her see the truth if she didn't want to?

The Eight opened the door for him, and he went inside the quiet ward. There was one other person besides Kara in here, Laura Roslin. _Frak. _The last thing he needed was to see her again, and his stomach churned with the thought. He hadn't liked the woman before, and the way she had just tossed him out an airlock without as much as a second thought to his lie that Adama was a cylon both unnerved and impressed the Two.

She watched him, and suddenly he motioned Caprica to stay out there, the woman didn't need to know everything. He knew Sharon and Agathon's child had died, though under mysterious sounding circumstances that were a little convenient for her, and that was the end of that. Roslin did not need to know that there were more hybrid children, she might see them as a threat or tell someone who certainly thought his child was an abomination. Caprica looked confused, but followed what he wanted and motioned she was going upstairs.

That was probably best, and it would give him some time to prepare Kara as opposed to waking her up and saying 'you have a child. Here she is her name is Kacey, isn't she adorable?'

Her pale skin and bright blonde hair stood out in sharp contrast from the black tank top she had chosen to wear when she got dressed. The edge of a strap from one of her black sports bras peeked out from the fabric, only to be covered by her hair, her long soft hair. The athlete's body was curled up on the bed into a fetal position, knees tucked in, arms close.

His senses were all too aware of being watched by Roslin as the Doctor did something for her knee, Leoben gently shook the woman he loved's shoulder, the tense muscles under his hand seeming to draw even tighter as she woke up from dreamland and travled back to the world.

Leoben looked at himself through her eyes, and truly wondered if this was even good for her anymore. All that seemed to happen was hurt, hurt after hurt piling on top of each other, all hurt for her. The news of a child wouldn't be accepted joyfully and happily like it had for him. It would be accompanied with pain, and even more painful memories.

When had his care for her stopped being about Kara's protection and needs and turned into what he wanted, which was for them to be a family? All his thoughts seemed to go over the days since he had pulled her from that cell, going over her every move and word. When had she first thought of hurting herself? Killing? Had she ever known it was him comforting her those nights instead of her family of people? Had there been something he had missed, a sign he needed to see but had missed, had it been wrong to take care from the cell back to his home?

Doubts shook the cylon down to his core, he didn't know what was right anymore. Would he turn this woman's world upside down, again, just to have his dreams? If he told her to walk out the front door of the complex and never look back, would she still try to kill herself? Would she go out in a blaze of glory, killed by the Centurions, or from the blast of a bomb only to be remembered in heroic stories that told of a warrior dying for the cause.

"Time to go home sleepy-head." He said, and felt the glare on his back from the former schoolteacher turned President turned schoolteacher again. Oh what the woman must be thinking, how he was off to hurt her, and do other horrible things that belonged inside horror movies as opposed to the real world.

_But was keeping her really helping her, or was he just hurting her as much as Jared did but in a different way? _A voice he was unable to push away mocked. Tonight would be a sleepless night in between taking care of Kacey, Kara's nightmares and his own moral dilemmas.

Bright, gold flecked eyes still half closed with sleep blinked up at him and he felt his heart constrict. He would do anything he could to stay with this woman forever, even if she never loved him. He could live in his projections, of them in a two story house by a wood, with their two children, and a garden, and a cat named Ella.

"Home's Galactica." she absently corrected him, not really paying much attention to what she was saying. Simon noticed she was awake and came over, carrying two vials of pills. The sharp glare of a pair of brown eyes from across the room looked at them both with undisguised contempt. If Leoben knew he had nothing to fear he would have been scared, even without the title of President when she wanted to, the woman could be very intimidating when she felt like it. _Just like another woman he knew. _

"Okay, so this one is for antibiotics to make sure nothing gets infected. Change the bandage out once a day after washing and be gentle with it. I want her extra careful so have her take one of these at dinner for a while." The Four handed him the first vial while Kara drifted back to a doze, not paying attention to either of them.

"This one." Simon tapped with his fingers against the one with more pills inside, "Is sleeping medication. Give it to her an hour before bedtime and she will be out a full eight hours. Couldn't rouse her even if you had hundreds of Centurions doing shooting practice. I gave her a tiny dose earlier for her nightmare, but it should wear off pretty soon and she will wake up, so hopefully this helps her sleep"

Without uttering a word Leoben put both in the pant's pocket. "Now, if she refuses to take her sleeping pill it can be dissolved into water, just make sure she drinks all of it and no one else does," Simon already answered his next question, but if she didn't want to take the drug, Leoben certainly would not force her to take it. that was wrong, and she deserved to have a bit of control of what she took to help her sleep.

"You going to hurt the Captain more?" Roslin finally spoke up, anger covering her matronly-looking features. "Just let the poor girl go, she woke up crying earlier."

"I'm not going to hurt her." Leoben was honestly tired of arguing this point now, everyone assumed he had her in some kind of BDSM set-up inside his apartment but that was most certainly not the case. It hurt and confused him as to why cylons seemed to think that, even his own brothers and a vats majority of snickering Ones. He was trying to get her to love him, and he'd wait forever if he had to, not get her to hate him for doing even more horrible things to her.

"Oh really?!" Roslin snorted, not going to get up and pace because of how her knee had been injured but Leoben was sure she would have if able. "She sure looks like she is in one piece to me, not broken or grieving at all, Gods what you have done to her, beyond anything that-"

"I didn't do anything." the words were dead still, calm and collected outside but seething on the inside. What was wrong with people? Was it really that hard to believe that he loved her, and that he had a vision that showed him that Kara would one day love him too.

"Doesn't matter. She's broken and if you don't let her go she's going to be broken forever." The former President warned but Leoben was no longer listening to her, he picked up the still sleeping Kara, the doctor must have given her something or she was simply faking, and made to leave. God, he could not go an entire day without someone, anyone, pointing out the seeming obvious that Kara didn't love him. He was fine with that, it was true after all, what bothered him was the assumption that would contuine, he had seen the future, and they did have a future together and she would love him, and they would be able to live happy ever after. It wasn't a fantasy, it was real and it would happen.

"I hope your knee gets better." He called back to the angry figure as he walked through the door with Simon's silent gaze following him out with a vengeful one from the brunette. He shifted the woman in his arms to hit the elevator button and sighed. It had been a long day that was only going to get longer. Sleepily Kara nuzzled closer to him, warmth passing between the two of them. He took a deep breath, he would get through this and the would all come out better for it.

* * *

><p><strong>Laura- <strong>

She hadn't known why the cylons chose to pull her from her class that day and stand there and wait while she hobbled along besides the Centurions with her make-shift crutch, her knee still giving her problems despite doing whatever Cottle told her too. She swore some of the exercises were purely for that crotchety old man's own amusement though, _Gods if Bill was here he would find it hilarious _The thought came up before she could stop it. Simply thinking of the way things had been made her sad.

But he wasn't, and they would simply have to make due with the fact he might never come back, and she may never see him or the proud ship he commanded with practiced ease ever again. She ached, but she never cried. Laura had not cried in a very long time, and now was not a time to mourn. It was a time to stew and plot, hide in the weeds and when the time was right, strike the enemy. How very militarily oriented thinking she now had.

She was understandably confused when a Centurion along with an Eight came to pull her from her class, again. The last time they had wanted information about the Resistance, information she simply did not have, she was as clueless as they were on where the missing cylons went when they vanished; now she had thought it was because she had not followed their state approved curriculum to the exact letter. Why the cylons cared how children learned about the works of Kataris she didn't know, but they had a curriculum for it.

But it seemed they wanted to play check up. She had found the medic ward odd. It was large, and yet at first she had seen no one in it except for the nurse Eight and a Four, the four claiming he wanted to check her leg.

"Why?"

"Because, if you don't take care of it, you could have pain the rest of your life." he explained gently, and she was taken aback at first. A) what was his game in being nice, and B) she was so used to gruff and demanding Sherman Cottle, his demeanor unsettled her completely.

As he examined her, he suddenly stopped and said he would be right back though it took her a minute to hear what he heard as well. A soft crying followed with whimpers. He walked back to the back room, and returned with a pill and glass of water and moved to almost the other side of the room. Laura pulled her glasses up from the string around her neck, and nearly jumped, it was Captain Thrace.

No one had seen hide nor hair of the legendary pilot, and many had assumed her a casualty, a loss, a picture to go on a memorial wall. Anders had not given up on his wife, but he had disappeared and days later she had been taken to his grave out in the woods. His death served as a warning, and investigations into where prisoners went became much more hush hush among the Insurgents. Laura had personally believed she had been on a Basestar, quite honestly that was where Laura would have put her if she had those resources at her disposal. Why keep her on the ground where it was much much easier for her to escape?

To see her had been a shock in itself, least of all here, her body was relatively unmarked but on closer inspection that she could see, a bandage covered part of her arm, and older wounds still seemed to be healing, a long white scar ran through the wing tattoo in her arm and it had not been there before. She was asleep, but had began to fidget and cry out. Laura moved to stand and go over, but the cylon waved her off and she stood unsure of what to do. Everything told her to go comfort the woman inside a nightmare, on the other hand, said woman was under cylon control, and Laura knew cylons hated their affairs messed with.

"Sam." the whimpered plea broke Laura's resolve to stay still and she moved while the cylon shook her awake, calling her name and rank over and over again, until her green eyes blinked open. Without a word the cylon put the pill in her mouth and lifted the glass to her mouth while at the same time tilting her head up to make sure she did not choke, its implications clear: Drink.

The Doctor, or as she preferred to think of him after learning of the farms, Mad Scientist playing at Doctor, laid her back down after she gulped down the water without even being given the chance to find out what it was and proceeded to walk back towards her. Behind him the Captain curled up, arms holding her knees tightly to her chest while her head rested in her arms, soft sobs shaking her body, gentling as she feel asleep, half covered by a blue blanket. "Get off the knee, you will hurt it even more." He chided gently as he sat down in his chair and began to look over her knee again.

Laura was still confused, how did the Captain get here, why was Laura herself here with her at the same time, what did it all mean, what had really happened to her and where was she being kept? Was there any way at all to free the poor woman? She had never seen the woman have active nightmares to the point where she called for someone, even down on Kobol she had been quiet as a mouse. For someone loud and vibrant while awake, asleep she could be mistaken for the dead. Was she herself just here to show the insurgents they had Kara, and were capable of prolonged captivity of people? With cylons, like politics, you always had to look for a less obvious reason. The extra ulterior motives they had about things, extra possible reasons, and as clichéd as it sounded, nothing was truly as it seemed. Toasters were tricky bastards.

After being poked and prodded and told to keep doing what she was doing, the cylon seemed in no hurry to have her leave. When asked when she could he just responded with "Soon." or "Your escort to the gate is busy." the silent medical ward was creepy. It was provided for very well, furnished with all kinds of things she suspected Cottle may even trade cigarettes for just to make his life easier. You could put lots of people here, and they would get better care and be more comfortable then in the tent Cottle had put together, unable to do much else with a lack of equipment from the _Baltar administration _Yeah right. _President Gaius Baltar_ did whatever the drugs, alcohol and the voices in his head told him to, not because it was right.

Finally, the doors opened and Leoben entered, he waved to someone outside before, heading straight to Kara. She remembered the Six's words, "A two" was this the same Two that had killed Samuel, or even if not the same one, had he had a hand in the man's death? Hell, every single cylon had a hand if you thought about it. If they were as all connected as Sharon aboard Galactica claimed, then they could have figured out the monster's intent long before the deed had been done.

The blond cylon gently shook Starbuck's shoulder, murmuring words that Laura could not hear. Laura believed that it was well within her right to be alarmed. The Twos were masters at manipulation, and had nearly caused a big rift between herself and Adama, all because he told her Adama had been a cylon. A reason Laura hated politics was all the lying, she could not even stand those little white lies she was told when asked how she looked. Fine? Why not better, you could really tell when they had not been paying attention.

Simon left her side, and went to his back room to go grab something, the sleepy soldier looked around without seeing before she shut out the world again. Probably whatever the Doctor cylon had given her earlier, Laura was sure of the fact she had been drugged with a sleeping pill. The woman she knew and the words docile did not belong in the same paragraph together. And yet there the fiery blonde was, dozed off and blinking, trying to wake up but unable to make herself do so.

Her previous alarm grew when they mentioned medication. _What cuts? What wounds that might get infected? _It was obvious Kara was still being hurt or had been hurt very recently, whether physically or through some nasty mind game Laura wasn't sure which. Nothing good came from prolonged activity with cylons, of that she was certain beyond a shadow of doubt. Time and time again, all that happened was cylons and humans going to war again and again in a never ending cycle of violence.

A sleeping medication, out for eight hours. As a woman, Laura quickly jumped to worst case scenario on what the male cylon could be doing to Galatica's finest. Asleep for eight hours, unable to resist or fight back or even have a chance to defend herself, Gods what the poor thing must be going through on a daily basis.

Laura felt she was right, when they talked about her refusing to take it. So what they were giving her was essentially able to be slipped into food or drink, and of course the Captain would not have any idea what they were doing to her and would be out asleep before she was any wiser to this fact.

"You going to hurt the Captain more?" She asked aloud, at first not even realizing she had spoken until two cylon heads snapped her way, seemingly shocked that she chose to interrupt their little chit-chat. "Just let the poor girl go, she woke up crying earlier." Her words grew stronger and went into the tone she used during press conferences, the kind she had also used as a teacher when one of her students was misbehaving and in need of correction. Laura usually got what she wanted whenever she used the tone.

"I'm not going to hurt her." The words dripped with arrogance and condescension, accompanied with a ice blue-eyed glare.

"Oh really?!" She snapped back, her fingers holding onto her cane with a death grip, knuckles white and clearly wishing she could be bashing the piece of wood into the sick creature's head. She was not prone to violence, but this was far worse than they had done to anyone else in the settlement. "She sure looks like she is in one piece to me, not broken or grieving at all, Gods what you have done to her, beyond anything that-"

"I didn't do anything." Came the deadly calm reply, the calm before the storm and the rage.

"Doesn't matter. She's broken and if you don't let her go she's going to be broken forever." Laura said before adding _if she isn't already _in her head. Forced captivity, doing Gods know what, torture, mind games, lies and deceit. It was a wonder to her she seemed in as good shape as Laura could tell, no serious injuries or crooked looking limbs. And she was pretty sure the Captain was functioning at full mental capcity as best she could while drugged.

The cylon stopped responding to her, ignoring her completely as he picked the pilot up as though she were a child's light-weight doll. Walking out of the medic ward without a second glance her way, he called back spitefully "I hope your knee gets better." Which made her fume and hate the damned thing even more.

She sighed in frustration, Men, human or machine, they simply always had to have the last word in an argument.


	26. Chapter 26

I'm so sorry this was not completed earlier, I have had been sick, life got extra stressful, and all that jazz. But I'm not giving up on any of my writing projects, and never ever will. So if you are still reading, thank you for reading.

* * *

><p><span><strong>Chapter 26<strong>

**Leoben-**

The male cylon sat on the edge of the bed and sighed, running his hands through his messy blonde hair. It was only 20:30, and it had already been enough to wear him out, extra robot strength or not. His hands automatically ran over his face, and he couldn't decided whether to stay up a bit and try and get more done or just crash and sleep until tomorrow morning. And then have more to do in the morning. His work would never be done.

Kara had not taken Kacey well. At all. She had gotten very quiet and retreated back into the bedroom upon discovering the little girl in his arms with Caprica. The attempt to draw her out and at least look at the baby, and meet her, had resulted in screaming, yelling and Kara fighting back until he let her be. She may not be in the best shape ever, but the viper pilot could still give him a bloody nose. She had curled up on the bed and was still there hours later.

Kacey had been easier. Leoben was terrified he was going to make a mistake, and had asked an Eight on some general help. He felt like he had gotten feeding her, and changing her down, but he had no idea if he was even close. And unlike her mother, she had eaten her dinner and not made a fuss. He was scared he would mess up this parenting thing and do something awful, or make a mistake and not know it until much much later. Humans seemed to say follow your instinct, but he was a machine. He knew nothing of following his instinct, or doing what felt right. He just wanted it to be right.

Leoben already adored the little girl, and he felt a feeling in him he didn't know quite how to deal with. He knew it was love, but he had never known love could take on more than one kind. Everything the cylon knew said love was all the same, just like sadness, or anger. There was one type. But there actually wasn't. There was the love he had for Caprica Six as his sister and friend, there was the love he had for Kara, a bright spark and a romantic love, and than there was the love for Kacey, a protective instinct and a want to make her life as happy as possible. No wonder humanity wrote of being in love so much, the emotions both dazzled and confused him. And he understood, why humans did some of the things they did, anything to experience the warmth of the feeling was worth it.

Shortly after dinner he had gone out and gotten one of the medical ward's beds and modified it into a crib for Kacey in the bedroom. Kara had sullenly ignored him, and had completely paid no attention to Kacey, whom he had set nearby, happily babbling. He didn't think she had any real impressions of what had happened to her, and at least the Simon had interacted with her. From what he understood, if she had not been interacted with, her mental development would not be so far. Of course, a lot of her farther development would depend on Kara, having one person pay you attention and another ignore you had to be bad somehow right?

Kacey had been premature, but she was overcoming it very well. At least the information, what little there was, on child development on file told him so. That would have to be remedied but that was a project for another day. And he wasn't sure how to go about it, ask a human obviously, but how to do that without making the insurgency have a panic attack that the cylons were out to steal their children was the trick question. The insurgency was bad enough, no need for them to needlessly panic over his parenting questions.

There had been more cylon disappearances lately, and no one was safe anymore. No longer did any humanoid go out alone, or even in pairs. They followed the same curfew humans did, and after it was dark out, only Centurions were in the streets. That police force that D'Anna was trying to put together was supposed to turn the tide in cylons vanishing, but he doubted personally it would do anything. Or maybe it would even increase, as the insurgency, and it had to be the insurgency, may even be in her little volunteer task force. New Caprica was far more dangerous for any cylon than any human. Of course being human they did not see it that way, but Leoben knew it to be true.

He rubbed his temples hard enough to turn them red. There had been so much going on, and he didn't know how much more he could really take on here. He had no idea how to make Kara want to live again, and had no idea how to be a father. And yet, he had to try. He had to do his job, he wouldn't fail either of them.

Leoben stretched out on the side of the bed, the tired muscle in his back at first protesting the stretch, than sighing into it. Kara was less than two feet away, but ignoring him. He could only see the curve of her back and her bright blonde hair. She was faced away from him, her legs brought up and had gathered herself into a ball. The viper pilot hadn't moved since she laid there originally hours ago.

With great caution Leoben put his hand on her shoulder, and tried to relax the tensed muscle there. _Just like petting a tiger _he thought amused, remembering back to the magnificent creatures in the Caprica Zoo. Her body did not want to budge and that only made him try harder, pushing at the knots. Kara didn't move, and was simply ignoring him like she had earlier. Her entire body was blocking him out, and not even her muscle would shift under his hand.

She had already been on edge, waking up in a strange place would probably do that to anyone. However, the little girl he was holding didn't really click in her brain until he introduced her to Kacey. She had instantly turned and practically fled back into the bedroom. When he tried to draw her back out to the living room to meet her, Kara had kicked, screamed and hit at him until he accepted she was not going to do this today.

He told himself she just needed time, she was under a lot of mental stress and fatigue and the last thing she had probably needed was the sudden responsibility for another life. But maybe, he hoped, it would be good for her to realize just how precious life could be, even in a dark place. And to help her realize, she wasn't her mother. they were two different people and the daughter was not like the mother.

After a few more minutes he gave up trying to sooth Kara, and sleep began to call for him. But he had things to do before he could sleep.

First he checked on Kacey, who was sleeping soundly in the crib on the other side of the room. There was probably another ideal place to put her, but Leoben had wanted to make sure he could check on her if need be. She was the first living cylon hybrid, excellent care was essential. It also reassured him that she was there, and that she wasn't going anywhere.

Second, he had to check on his other girl. He sat down by her feet, and she didn't acknowledge she was aware of him at all. She was in some remote corner of her mind, and no amount of baiting, or drawing, or pushing, would get her out until she damn well wanted to. that was a lesson he had a hard time learning with Kara, she did not give you any of her thoughts unless she wanted you to know them.

"I'm going to get you a glass of water and your sleep medicine."

He got a blank stare in response.

"You can take them if you like, the option is yours, but I'm still here for you if you need me."

Leoben ran his hands through his hair again when she didn't respond to him or answer him. He knew Kara and Starbuck was alive in there somewhere, she just didn't want to come out in front of him. And that fact depressed him. She should be able to be herself in front of him more than other people, he wasn't like other people. He would never hurt her, he loved her, cared for her and would do anything she needed to make her smile.

He tried to smile at her but he felt it didn't work. He just went to the kitchen, grabbed one of her pills and filled her up a glass of cool water anyways. He said he would do it for her, and he kept his promises. She had to know that. He would never lie to her. He still received no response in putting it on the nightstand and he sighed.

Leoben Conoy was giving up for the day and going to bed early. After he was ready for bed he slipped under the covers on the other side from Kara, explaining it was for Kacey to an unquestioning gaze. He was able to sink into a dark sleep almost instantly, which was the rest he needed.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

She waited until his breathing fully evened out before she moved. Every fiber in her protested at her stretching out after being held still for so long, and cried out their displeasure at her stretches. Kara could not find it in her to care very much. She couldn't find much in her to care for anything anymore.

Jared had called her dollface. Because that was what she was to him, a toy. A doll to be used for his own amusement in whatever way he saw fit. She was every inch Leoben's doll as she had been Jared's, even more so a doll to Leoben. If Jared had been the mean older brother who kicked the dolls through the mud just because he could, Leoben was the one who took excellent care of them, and never let them get scoffed.

She lived in his dollhouse, a play version of her own Caprican apartment, similar to reality but tweaked to his preference and liking. She only had options to do what he wanted her to, he controlled her life just like a child might control her doll's. She couldn't get out of his dollhouse either, not even death could reach her here. It was all under his control, his game and he decided how she would live her lie. Just like a child decided a doll's.

And now there was a new addition, and this scared her. Leoben had said that they would have a happy family and live happily ever after, but the addition of the baby, Kacey, made his words extra real. It was one thing to say Leoben was missing a few screws, but for it to actually happen? It meant he was either really an oracle, not likely being his God wasn't real, or that he planned it out this way from the start.

It also raised the question of, since he wanted her to love him, what would he do for it? He said he wouldn't hurt her, but then again so had her mother after hitting her and look at how that had turned out. Or maybe even what had he already done, Leoben had drugged her before, when he first kidnapped her, kept giving her pain pills that made her sleepy after Jared, and now falling asleep in a medical ward and waking up in bed. If he had no problem drugging her, and clearly he didn't, what was he doing when she was out. What was he doing when she was defenseless and had no way to remember?

Were his sleeping pills part of his diabolical plan to slowly break her mind? She felt like she was slipping, her faith in a resistance rescue had long since eroded, and the chances of Galactica returning grew slimmer as the more time passed, and the more cylon fortifications could be built. she wasn't going to loose faith, she had never stopped praying to the Gods despite what happened to her, and she couldn't afford to think Adama wasn't coming back. Because that would mean he didn't think she was family anymore, and Kara couldn't lose that. She had already lost too much.

_Maybe he and Jared had even been in it together,_ her mind reasoned, h_e got to be her rescuer and got rid of Sam all in one swoop._ Plus he broke her body and spirit.

Which was the first step, because Kara Thrace was convinced Leoben was after her very soul.

_Think Thrace, think _She commanded her brain, only to draw a blank. Escape had been blocked, and Leoben was not going to just not come back. Specially now he had a little girl in here too. There was no way out, and she was stuck in this stupid fracking dollhouse with a baby, and a deranged cylon who pretended to be in love with her.

Kara pitied the child's mother, because there was no way in Hades she had a child. The Gods could surely not be that cruel to her, take away her husband's child, dying before he even had a chance to form, and instead give her the child made through a means that was horrifying and a twisted sick means. No, not even a God who wanted to punish her could be that cruel, they simply wouldn't do that to her. Her own baby boy was in Elysium with Sam, his name would have been Zakary Alexander, his favorite color was green, he would have been great at pyramid, he would have always been getting in trouble because he was so curious. He'd had his whole life ahead of him, and the chance to live had been snatched away before he had even been allowed to breathe for the first time.

The little girl had to belong to someone else, there was no way she could be Kara's. Kara wasn't allowed to be around kids, she would frak them up and taint them if left to her own devices. Or worse, she would turn into Socrata Thrace, and Kara could not live with herself if she inflicted that kind of pain and fear on a child.

There were lots of blonde women in the human settlement, the cylons had simply gone and snatched a baby from one and brought it here. That was all. She was probably completely human, and even if she was, how could she love something half the enemy? Something half cylon, the things that destroyed her world, humanity's world, without a single second thought or moment's hesitation? Love for a child was supposed to be effortless and unconditional, or so all the stories and the scriptures said. And yet, Kara didn't think she could do that for a hybrid. It was half evil, half what killed Sam.

Kara gently laid herself back down. Funny how she used to never be able to sleep in the bed, and now she couldn't think of sleeping anywhere but? Somehow or another, it had become associated in her mind as a safe place, one where Leoben didn't bother her. Used to anyways, then she had discovered he hugged her all night long. She got nightmares, but it was the only place besides the shower she could count on being completely left alone. But not anymore, now the tiny bathroom wasn't even sacred as Leoben took it upon himself to knock every five minutes to check on her.

What if she hadn't gotten her shower alone and simply didn't remember? The thought scared her a great deal, what if she just simply didn't remember? She hadn't remembered being woken up by Leoben every night like he claimed until yesterday, what if her mind was just blocking it?

Would she ever be able to know what was real and what wasn't? Maybe Leoben had messed her up so much she couldn't tell facts from fiction anymore. What if he was brainwashing her? Her nightmares were confusing and scary enough, and being carried into the real world was a huge concern.

_They can't follow you if you don't have them. _Her mind sang out, and she looked at the glass and the pill next to it. The glass had already left a ring of condensed water on the dark wood, but she didn't care. It was the small white pill that captivated all of her attention, in its small, round, white smooth surface.

It looked like every sleeping pill she had ever seen, but her mind questioned the 'what if' portion. What else could the pill do to her? Would it be worth the possible outcome to have just one night, free and uninterrupted? She wouldn't be dragged back to the prison she sought to leave no trace of in her waking hours.

Kara Thrace made the choice, and swallowed the pill. Some demons she didn't want to remember.

* * *

><p><strong>Leoben-<strong>

He awoke with a start at the grand lovely time of 2:43 AM, panting and shaking covered in a sweaty sheen. He understood the concept of nightmares, understand that they were the mind playing out a rational fear when the rest of your brain was asleep.

But that didn't quite change how much it shook him up. He never wanted to go through that again, and he was not sleeping anymore tonight without some extra help that was sure. he felt a pang of empathy for Kara, going through that once was bad enough, he couldn't imagine the fear of going to sleep and being ragged back to the place where your mind was the enemy night after night. Until now.

He really should know better, Jared was dead. Leoben had killed Jared with his two hands, in a manner of speaking. Jared couldn't come back, Jared would not hurt Kara anymore. Jared would not be able to hurt anyone anymore. He only existed in memories, there was no present form of him, only past.

But Jared was still hurting her, and now from beyond the grave the cylon was hurting Leoben too. The dead look as she had cut into her own skin in an attempt to end it scared him. Everything in him knew humans were designed to protect themselves, above all things to protect their own survival and that of the rest of mankind. What could cause someone to lose that most basic instinct, Leoben didn't understand.

But he began to sympathize with her more than he ever had before. His nightmare had him running back through the halls, her screams echoing down the hallways as he searched frantically, only to find the male cylon leering at him over Kara's dead body, empty glass eyes still etched with fear. The idea that Kara could die was more real to him now, and he needed to do something to protect her from the demons that swirled in her mind. He had to do something, lest he lose her to them.

Something had to be done, that was very clear. That and he was running out of time, and if he didn't so something fast, Kara would be gone, a whisp of smoke, and it would be her he put in the ground next to Samuel Anders. Kacey would grow up and never know her mother, and the fate of humanity would change. Leoben did not know how or why, but Kara was a key role in the saga of humanity's survival.

Leoben looked carefully over her sleeping form, as though the answers were there in front of him, waiting to be understood if only he studied hard enough. She was still curled up in a ball, but much looser, and her breathing was relaxed and even. The pill he had left on her nightstand was gone, and he only hoped she had taken it, she did not need to start a stash and kill herself that way. He resolved to watch her take it, just to make sure. He knew she hated being watched, but she needed to be watched. the chance of him losing her if she was left to her own devices was far to great.

He gently reached a hand out, and followed the curve of her shoulder to her waist. She was there, solid, and breathing. She was alive, and he would make sure she was okay. Kara had a destiny, and it did not include dying at her own hands. She was going to keep living, and she was going to raise Kacey. She would have a family, a real family.

Scooting closer to her he gently scooped her up and hung on to her, her light form fitting in with his like two pieces in a puzzle. Not dead at Jared's feet. Breathing here with him, far away from where anyone could hurt her anymore. She was safe with him, the outside world of pain and grief couldn't get her in the apartment. He wouldn't let it, and would stop at nothing to make sure nothing could hurt her.

It was a fantasy world, a utopia, but Leoben didn't mind. He knew the world of New Caprica was not meant to last, but that did not mean he could not try and shield her from the hurt of it as much as he could. New Caprica had been horrible to her, but it also gave her things, like Kacey. His job was to soothe as much of the bad as he could, and bring joy with the good. Kara deserved some joy more than anyone else he knew.

He still was trying to wrap his head around the fact. They had a daughter, a baby girl. She was so fragile, so little, she was dependent on them in every way. Out of all the cylons, God had actually chosen to give him a daughter. The second hybrid they knew of and the only living one. He knew nothing about how to parent, but he knew how not to parent. He just needed Kara to realize that, she knew how not to parent. And he needed her to help him with that, every step of the way.


	27. Chapter 27

Hey, so I have not fallen off the face of the earth, I've simply had one health issue after another, followed by Doctors' offices and all the fun things that go along with them, but I'm getting better everyday and finally managed to write something that made sense. so please enjoy, and all critique is welcome.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 27-<strong>

**Leoben-**

He woke up to the sound of a baby crying and for a minute thought he was in another dream again. It wouldn't be the first time that had happened to him, many of his visions occurred that way. But this was real, and he was awake. He pulled his arm from around Kara's waist as she stirred, afraid he would scare her by being that close to her while she slept. It didn't take an expert to know she would have a hard time being close to people for a long time to come. Specially with touch, every Six had known and felt some of the ramifications of what had happened to Gina, and reminded him multiple times of it, comparing Gina's situation with her's. Kara was already struggling, he wanted to save her from drowning not accidentally pull her under. Leoben pushed his tired body to its feet, moving on automatic and went to the make-shift crib where the sounds were coming from.

Kacey looked like anything but the cute little baby he cuddled in his arms yesterday. A small part of his brain wondered what had happened. Her face was red, and tears rolled down her little face and she hadn't made these crying noises. _Think Leoben, what does she want? _He obviously wasn't good at this parenting thing, and turned around to look at Kara, hoping something in her manner would give him a hint on what he was supposed to do or give him a place to start. Despite the fact most cylons would love a child, with the exception of maybe the Ones, Fours and Fives, no single cylon had any real idea on how to raise kids. That had always been humanity's department, not theirs.

She looked back at him, clearly annoyed. Her hands ran through her ruffled blonde hair and she blinked at him. Her tank was twisted, revealing the soft white skin it hid and had just a hint of a pink scar, twisting around under her arm. He couldn't help but stare at the skin, spellbound. He knew exactly where that scar looped before it intersected with another on her ribcage, he knew the shape it made and the jagged end that stopped suddenly. He knew from Simon where all her scars twisted and met, he could picture them, bright red contrasting with the pale white of her skin. He knew where her physical scars were, old ones from her mother to the new one on her wrist. He'd memorized them all.

A high pitched shriek made him realize he was staring overtly. Leoben quickly dropped his gaze from the woman to her child, a slight red flush heating his face. _God what she must think of him_. If she didn't think he was weird before she surely did now. "Do you know what to do?" He asked tentatively while Kacey's cries grew in volume. Leoben quickly began to shh her, attempting to soothe her and tried to rock her back and forth but to no avail. The little girl was upset, and everyone with ears on the entire planet and on a ship in it's immediate atmosphere was going to know about it.

All he got in response from Kara was a glare mixed with some other emotion he couldn't identify. Before he could comment farther she walked out of the room and shut the door behind her and he assumed went and hid in the bathroom or the office. Not like he blamed her. He should have known better than to stare. Now he was on his own, with a crying baby and no idea on how to change her from crying to the happy he had played with last night.

He tried to run through the checklist of everything he could think of. Did she need to get her diaper changed, she was probably hungry too, maybe she was just bored and decided to scream at him and wake him up. Lord knew he couldn't get a decent nights sleep. Leoben briefly wondered if he would ever get one again before he yawned.

* * *

><p>Half an hour later Leoben was quite pleased with his victory. He had managed to change Kacey without making a mess, and put her in a new set of clothes that had been lying around Simon's lab. The corners of his mouth turned up when he remembered Caprica had nicely demanded she be allowed to make some clothes for Kacey. Sixes had a thing for clothing. As much as the Six models were diverse, clothing was the only thing that could really seem to pull Sixes together. The only word he managed to get in was the clothing shouldn't be frilly or pink. Kara would hate that. Caprica had laughed and agreed to make some clothes for the little girl.<p>

The little baby was quiet now, and it completely awed Leoben something so little and fragile could make so much of a racket. She had some powerful lungs, and was not afraid to use them. Maybe she got that stubborn streak of not shutting up from the Starbuck side of Kara. The thought made him shake his head in amusement. He had thought he had known for a long time just how precious life was, clearly he was just learning.

If Kacey had been cooperating yesterday, she was clearly not this morning. In the chair Leoben had quickly fixed up to pretend to be a highchair, Kacey did not want to eat anything. He had been sitting there for quite a few minutes trying to get the little girl to open her mouth and accept the train, viper, food, spoon. But no matter what he called the utensil, or no matter how much he cajoled her, she wouldn't open her mouth. Little blue eyes blinked at him interested, but wouldn't respond to his pleas she eat her breakfast. She clearly got some stubbornness from Kara.

He even tried giving Kacey the spoon so she could try herself if that was what she wanted, and while her little fingers grasped the metal, they immediately lost interest in the soft food on it. Instead her tiny hands began to play with the spoon itself, a fascinating new thing to an eight month old child.

Leoben sighed and gave up. She would eat sooner or later, and Kacey wouldn't starve herself. He went to the kitchen and grabbed a bowl from the cupboard to whisk eggs in. It was only the beginning of what was going to be a long day. Multiple cylons had announced their intentions through Caprica to visit today, and many cylon models were going to be knocking on his door, hoping to get a glimpse of God's miracle. Even Caprica herself wanted to come by again, claiming she wanted to make sure she was getting Kacey's measurements right in order make her some clothes.

The male cylon privately suspected Caprica had another reason for stopping to visit the apartment. He was the only one he knew of that was privy to Caprica's secret want of a child. He had sat there and listened to her go on about her dream of a family, although why she picked Gaius Baltar to have it with, Leoben still wouldn't understand. He knew she wanted two little boys and a little girl. Caprica wanted the boys to be born first to be good older brothers to the little girl. The oldest boy was going to be named James, the second was going to be named Benjamin, and the little girl named Lily. She had wanted to live out in a typical suburban house on the far outskirts of Caprica city, by the lakes and the tree line. Close enough to nature for comfort, and close enough to Caprica city to be near all the things about city life she didn't want to give up. It was her dream life.

He knew she was a more than a little jealous of the fact he got a child and she did not, but he hoped he could remedy that by letting her spend time with Kacey. While chopping up tomatoes, he reflected that as his sister Caprica could say she had some kind of family relationship. She was certainly the only other cylon he really trusted enough to possibly watch Kacey without him there. He considered her a sister, that made her family, and an Aunt to Kacey.

All these new choices and responsibilities suddenly crept up and dawned on him. At some point Kacey was going to go after boys, or girls, he would support her either way, and he would have to deal with it. He might even get to be a grandfather one day. He had of course daydreamed about a family, and every now and then get a vision with one, but Leoben had never stopped and considered just how much his life would change. It wasn't just about Kara anymore, it was Kara and Kacey. His daughter and the mother of his daughter. His family. The word was so foreign, he had never before been able to really apply it to himself this way before. He had a family with Kara, a tie, a bond that she couldn't deny or erase away.

Speaking of Kara, the bathroom door creaked upon and she peered out, gauging the situation. Her hair hung in wet strands around her face, and the bathroom released hot humid air. She had taken a shower, or at least run it, and he hoped that she felt better. Everyone felt better cleaner, it was a cleansing thing, washing away all the things that made a person feel dirty with warm soapy water. All the dirt and bad things were swept away down the drain, and only the good and pure remained.

"I'm almost done with breakfast. You need to eat because there are lots of people coming in and out of the apartment today." He tried to keep his voice cheerful and focused on making the omelet in front of him rather than her reaction to him being an optimist. He was sure she would be unhappy with tons of cylons coming in and out of the apartment. "They all want to see Kacey." he explained to her unasked question, hoping that by knowing that her nerves would not be frazzled.

He finally looked up to see her half way out the bathroom, standing in the doorway, looking for all intents and purposes a deer in the headlights. He couldn't blame her, it would be unsettling for her to go from near isolation to having what had to be half of the cylon population on New Caprica waltzing through the bars that served as her barrier from the outside world. He faintly hoped she would see cylons weren't monsters, that they had feelings and that they value the life of a child.

Then again, Kara was more stubborn than anyone would really give her credit for and he could try all he wanted, she wouldn't believe anything unless she damn well wanted to. He had made that mistake enough times to realize that. He could not make her believe anything until she felt like believing him.

"Will you try feeding Kacey for me? She won't eat for me." He kept his voice light but he couldn't keep the tension out of it. Kara needed to start accepting Kacey, Kacey was her daughter. Her flesh and blood. Her DNA. Leoben hoped that if he got her to be around Kacey a little more, she would grow to love her. Leoben couldn't fathom how she didn't already. She was the most adorable little girl there ever was in his opinion.

Leoben looked up to see Kara still frozen. "Kara," he gently called. "Kara. Kara?" The third time finally got her attention before she looked at him. "See if you can get Kacey to eat." He tilted his head towards the table where Kacey sat, happily babbling to herself and playing with a spoon, still not putting it anywhere near the food.

The viper pilot didn't move, remaining frozen to the spot. "Please?" He didn't mean for it to come out as a question but it did. His exhaustion was already starting to take a toll on him as he flipped the omelet off the pan and began to make another for himself.

It was going to be another very long day.

* * *

><p><strong>Kara-<strong>

The plea of please actually got to her, crawling under her skin and internalizing itself. This was his little game, why did he have to pretend it wasn't? It made things worse in the end, and she did not trust Leoben any farther than she could throw him. Being that that she hadn't exercised in a while and had a lot happen in between then and now, it was unlikely she could do more than lift him off the ground. Maybe not even that. Pretending made it so much worse, because one day she knew she would probably start to believe him.

She absently padded over to the place next to the little girl. Kara felt another pang of sympathy for the child. She didn't know what was going on; she was caught in the middle between all kinds of things a child of her age would never be able to comprehend. Things she shouldn't have to comprehend to begin with. Leoben brought over a box of crackers and set them on the table before returning to the kitchen "Would you try feeding her some of those too? See if she likes them any"

_Didn't lots of people visiting to see her mean she was the real thing?_ Her mind queried but she shut the train of thought down. Kara didn't think she could handle that, why would the Gods take her little boy away, and she had known in her head ever since Simon confirmed she had been pregnant it would have been a boy, why would the Gods take him away but give her this little girl? Not that the little girl shouldn't exist, but it just wasn't fair. Why did Leoben's child get to live but Sam's didn't? Sam hadn't done anything wrong, Leoben was a cylon, he destroyed their home planets. Millions, no billions, of people died because of Leoben. Sam had only killed cylons, who didn't count anyways. Sam had been the hero here, Leoben the villain and yet the villain won. That wasn't supposed to happen.

It just wasn't fair she bitterly lamented. The injustice of it left an acidic taste in her mouth and rage at everything that had happened to her began to uncoil the longer she let the train of thought go on.

And then she stopped, guilt at being angry consuming her soul. Shame grabbed at her and didn't let her go. Her mother had been consumed with rage at all the bad things that had happened, that Kara had been allowed to exist and look at what had happened as a result of that rage. No matter how much anger she had inside, Kara had vowed a long time ago that she would never ever become her mother. She had no plans on breaking the promise made long ago.

Her hands automatically guided the spoon into the food and guide it to the little girl's mouth. Bright blue eyes looked up at her trustingly and with curiosity. Her throat choked up, this little girl was so innocent. She had never learned to fear her, never learned that Kara was a frak-up who ruined everything that she touched. Kara's fingers slid below the seam of the box, and withdrew a handful of small crackers and placed them in front of Kacey. Small little hands grabbed them, and she testingly put them in her mouth. She must have liked them, Kara mused, because she didn't spit it out.

Had she ever looked like that as a little girl? Had she ever looked at her own mother that way? Had her mom even cared about her? Had her mom ever done any of the stereotypical mom things when she was a little girl, did she fed her and rock her to sleep? Kara's childhood were full of holes and blurred memories, it hurt too much to remember and what was clear were things, events and people she would rather forget. Those questions she wasn't even sure she wanted the answers to.

Why was Kacey here? Surely Leoben, who knew her history all too well, should know better than to bring a little girl in Kara's presence. Kara glanced down, watching the child, she was getting the hang of things, eating the bite-sized crackers with her hands without a problem.

She felt the cylon's ice blue eyes watching her. Kara didn't make any comment. She wasn't doing this because he told her to, though she would let him think that if it made him feel better. She was doing it because Kacey was an innocent child and shouldn't be ignored. While it was true Kara didn't want to be a parent, she would never be able to live with herself if she did anything that could be considered neglect of a child. That would mean she was her mother, and thousands of things her mother had said to her over the years would have been right. That she frakked everything up, and that she messed it all up.

"Thank you." Leoben said softly and it caused her to jump slightly. He was a lot closer than she had thought he was, his words raising goosebumps on her skin. Her perceptions were beginning to mess up, her judgement on distances failing. Her personal space was too close to being invaded by the cylon. He hung on the edge, keeping a thin balance. He was close enough to make her uncomfortable, but not close enough she felt like she had a right to freak out about it without seeming insane.

Leoben placed an omelet at her spot, funny how she didn't even question that anymore, just the way she had liked them, ham, cheese, tomatoes, and lettuce. She had stopped wondering how he knew her food preferences a while ago. A few seconds later he placed a fork down along with a glass of water. He did the same for his own spot and invited her to take a seat with the nod of his head.

Kara did, she didn't know what to do anymore. She was an automaton, there was no way to get out of this. Even her day dreams had been torn to shreds by her nightmares. She could never think of Sam without again seeing the cylon standing over him, holding a knife, while Sam's normally handsome face marred with blood and pain, complaining she wasn't who he thought she was and how she had failed him as a wife. Lee didn't care she was here, and he only came to yell at her in her dreams, reminding her that she would never be good enough to him, and that she should never ever forget that. Even gentle Zak, who had never judged or raised his voice at her in the entire time she had known him, didn't want to have a thing to do with her, avoiding her altogether and refusing to even look at her.

Her life was this pointless thing, kept only alive for Leoben's amusement. She would have no use as a pilot, her nerves far too frayed and jumpy to have the skills to pilot a plane. If she were to be on a battlestar right now and hear condition one called over the intercom, she wouldn't trust herself in a plane. And if she wasn't a pilot, she was a nothing. Just like her mother had told her she would be.

Kara Thrace had finally made it to rock bottom, just where her mother had predicted she would end up. Alone, unloved, and useless. A waste of air, a waste of space and good resources. Well what else was new?

"Kara please eat your breakfast." The cylon asked her, voice low. She fully studied him from across the glass table, and he looked tired, wrinkles at the corners of his eyes, dulled with lack of sleep, and he rested his head on one hand. He was tired of putting up with her, and Kara knew it. Normally she'd feel guilty. But not anymore, now all she had to do was get him to give up.

"No." She fired back. Resisting was futile, she had learned that a long time ago, bad things happened to Kara Thrace whether she liked them or not. But she was tired of this game, tired of his control, and him having the upper hand for so long. She had promised Sammy she would fight until the end, just like she should, even though giving in would be so much easier. _Giving up doesn't hurt as much,_ a voice in her head reminded her, sounding a lot like the cylon who'd killed her husband. Kara wanted to just give up and fade away into nothing so very badly. It would make the pain stop.

"Please?" He begged, trying to get her to eat. She glared at him with her arms crossed her chest, the poster girl for the word No. "Why not?"

"You can't control me anymore." she replied back. She would eat, eventually. The food tempted her already, Leoben, despite everything else, could really cook. That was the only good thing about cylon prison with Leoben, she got to eat real food again. Such a small payoff for everything else she had lost.

"Kara, I am not controlling you." He was earnest, and he seemed to really believe what he was saying. But did he really, the Admiral's words still echoed in her head _The problem with Leoben, isn't that he lies. That'd be too easy, it's that he mixes lies with truth. _It was far more likely Leoben was simply playing his ignorance, trying to lull her into seeing things his way. That's all cylons did, lie and hurt people.

"Yes you are!" She snapped, more force coming out with the words than she intended. "You control everything I do, and you keep me in here, none of my choices are my own anymore," She trailed off, unwilling to talk anymore. She dropped her eyes back down to the food in front of her. She was so lost she finally admitted to herself, she didn't even know what she was supposed to be doing anymore.

_Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit_. She hadn't meant to confront him. That was never part of the plan. The plan had been not eat anything, and go back into the bedroom. Hide all day. Avoid all his visitors, and especially avoid Kacey. Maybe later tonight she could cry herself to sleep and not have a nightmare. Rinse and repeat until she managed to escape her cell, in any way possible by any means possible.

"Kara I give you choices, I let you do whatever you would like, give you options, ask your opinion on things, it's you who keeps yourself locked in your mind."

"No you don't." The words came out soft enough she wasn't sure he could hear them. Even now she wasn't sure she even understood what she was trying to say. She was used to acting on the whim of others, hell that was how the military worked. But there had always been the option, the option to mutiny, or hit that superior asshole right in the mouth where he deserved it. She didn't have that option here.

"How don't I?" Blue eyes had their complete attention on her now, the small child munching on crackers forgotten, the food on the table forgotten, nothing was given any mind. He watched her and it eerily reminded her of a Centurion, locking its eye on whatever thing it wanted to shoot.

"You don't let me die."


End file.
